Jennifer's Journal - I don't want to die, I want to go to Disney! (comments welcome)

[TigerCheer2009]

AMEN!!!

I eat salad, tomatoes and cukies! (cucumbers)

Have an awesome day!

 

[jwann]

Okay -- second week of First Place and I lost 2 more pounds. The keeping track of exchanges continues to be a pain and I have discovered that I will go days without eating a vegetable. I can tolerate a salad as a side and carrots as a snack but I need options (btw, I don't like tomatoes or cucumbers).

ANyway, just got back from seeing my favorite Bible teacher, Beth Moore, from an event in Indianapolis. She, and the praise band (Travis Cottrell and others) were AWESOME!

I did well on my eating but haven't exercised in 5 days.
I will tonight.

Bible verse of the week:
"If you beleive, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22

Lord God, please grant me the strength to avoid bingeing, to eat healthy, and to be motivated to exercise. Also, I lift up the others on this DISboard as they continue to overcome their stronghold of food. Amen

 

[TigerCheer2009]

Hi Jennifer! You can do this! Spruce up your vegetables, adventure out, try new veggies. Since you don't like tomatoes or cukes, try other veggies in to other foods. Spaghetti sauce=chop up veggies like onion and green pepper (cooked correctly, there is no taste). Veggie lasagna (yum!) Muffins and breads=add pureed carrot. Meat loaf=get creative. Add in pureed cauliflower (wonderful, I tell you, and I hate most veggies). Soups=corn chowder with broccoli and carrots chopped really small so you can't tell they are there, or beef stew with pureed or minced veggies. Macaroni and cheese=add in corn. Bear in mind that I don't count exchanges, but there are about a zillion and one ways you can hide veggies so that you actually eat them. Good luck!

AMEN! I love your prayers and verses and quotes! Keep it up!

 

[jwann]

Excellent ideas, TigerCheer2009!!
I'll just have to pretend I'm hiding the veggies from my kids when in fact I am hiding them from myself!!

 

[TigerCheer2009]

Egg-zactly! Enjoy! Oh...and make sure to include which ones you used!

 

[jwann]

Update:

Lost 1 pound this week!
I have walked 2.5 miles each day for the last 3 days!
I have been binge free for 10 days!!

Go me!

 

[jwann]

Good news and bad news....

Good news: I have starting doing some jogging during my walks. I discovered a 10-week training program that takes you from walking to running. My husband and I have decided to do the half marathon at Disney in 2007. In order to start training for that, it is recommended that you have been running consistently for at least 1 year. Since the training program for the half marathon is an 18 week program, I have to start running consistently by Sept. of THIS year. I can't see myself ever running 13.1 miles BUT I think I can walk/run it -- especially if I am close to my ideal weight!

Bad news: I have binged 2 of the last 4 days. I don;t know what my problem is! I think I am stressed over my kids' baseball and the fact that our A/C broke down yesterday, and we have $177 to get us through to the end of this month. I just need to let that go!! I do NOT have to be numbed to life's ups and downs!!

One of my favorite songs says "Jesus I am resting, resting, in the joy of what Thou art. I am finding out the greatness of Thy loving heart." I'm gonna let that be my theme and hopefully that will help be stop the binge before it happens!

Thanks for listening.

BTW, I have discovered the prepared bowl salads at the grocery that come with lettuce in one compartment, chicken or ham or turkey in another, cheese in another, and a packet of dressing. Though they are $3, I have been better at getting my veggies in! Also, I have added cut celery to my tuna salad and have been buying carrot chips for snacking. Thanks for all the suggestions!

 

[TigerCheer2009]

Oh, Jenn!!!!!!!! C'm-ere! It sounds like you need a hug!

Kudos on the jogging. I'm having eating problems too. Turn off the voices in your head that say eateateat and ignore them. Allow yourself one free day a week, but be good all the other days. Congrats on the downage poundage!!

Good for you getting your veggies in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so proud of you. Look how far you've come!! Now hurry up and keep looking forward.

Hugs of assorted shapes and sizes are floating your way, girl! I'm pulling for you! I know you can beat the binge monster. Have you been drinking your water? You should try that instead of snacking.

Most importantly, remember that today is a NEW day! Fill it positively...those days are in the past and gone forever. I know you can do this!

What also helps is writing a letter to the Binge monster! For some examples, look in my journal. They realign your stars so you can get going again. I've written to TOM, the Binge Monster, and my chubalub. It helps a bunch!

Hugs and positive thoughts,
From: Me!

 

[goldcupmom]

Binges happen! We just have to move on!

Congrats on the loss and on deciding to do the 1/2. That's totally incredible.

Just keep on going ....you're doing GREAT!!

 

[calena]

Congrats on the decision to do the 1/2. I am also thinking about it for 2007. I am jogging too and walking to build up to running right now, so I know how it feels. I think the extra energy jogging does make us hungry. Eat some protein - nuts or cheese or a slice of deli lean turkey - to ward off the hunger pains. Stay away from the refined carbs. The important thing is to get back on track. You can do it. You are doing it! "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me!"

 

[jwann]

I am humbled by all the kind words, words of encouragement, and tips that I have had on this journal. My journey has brought me 5 pounds lighter, an acknowledgement that I am a compulsive binge eater, short term (1derland by our trip in OCt.) and long term (1/2 marathon in 2007) goals, run/walking for 30 minutes 4 times a week, and step by step closer to God's will for my life. WOW! Some stupid binge (or two) will NOT STOP this journey. My friends, your words of encouragement touch my heart and keep me going.

BTW, goldcupmom, I see in your signature that you've reached your goals. WAY TO GO! I love seeing other's reach their goal. It makes me say...hey, I can do that, too!


Tigercheer, here's my message for my "binge monster" aka "my will over God's will"....
You come quietly enough. You hide in my cabinets and my refrigerator. You say, "I'll just wait right here until your husband goes to work or your family goes to bed." You seduce me with thoughts like "Just have one" or "You did great today, you deserve a reward." You show me opportunities like - "if you take just one, you can eat it on the computer, hide the wrapper in the bottom of the trash can, and no one will know." Or perhaps, binge monster, you are the extra couple bucks I have in my purse -- calling out to be spent on french fries or Krystal burgers. "You have enough time to drive through, eat, and throw away the wrappers before you get home. A piece of gum will hide your sin and driving with the windows down will blow out the stench." I say stench because before the binge it is a "smell" of McDonalds but after the binge it is a "stench" of guilt and self-loathing. Once you have your hands on me, binge monster, the flood gates open. You have wet my appitite for food and nothing but an over-stuffed belly will stop me from bingeing. Only when I am numbed by the aching stomach and the after taste of two extra stength maalox lingers in my mouth do you leave -- slithering on your stomach out of my sight. Like the serpent in the Garden of Eden you say, "Did God REALLY say that you shouldn't eat that?" And there I lay, on my right side hoping to let gravity move the food out of my stomach into my colon so I don't vomit. Thinking to myself, "Where are the fig leaves? I want to hide from people and from God." But now you are in the light, binge monster. You are being shown for what you really are. No more hiding. If I eat -- I will eat in front of those who love me. I will NOT forget you but I have learned to RECOGNIZE you. That is where you are to me now -- OUTed -- for all to see. Be warned! My God is bigger than you. My God is stronger than you. MY GOD will trample you under his feet!!!! Take THAT, binge monster.....

Good, I feel better now.

 

[TigerCheer2009]

WHOA!!!!!! Loved your letter. Tell it like it is, sister! Keep up the awesome work, have a positive day and remember you CAN beat the Binge Monster!!!

 

[Lesli54]

Congrats on the lost lbs.

We all have days that are not so good, but just remember to keep on going back to your program and in the end you will win with a healthier you. Moving on past the bad days makes all the difference in the world.

Keep up the good work.

 

[calena]

How are things going? Hope you are doing well with the jogging. It has been so hot here I have been doing more swimming than jogging, but I love to swim, so it is great.

 

[TigerCheer2009]

Hey Jennifer!!!! I thought about you at ALIVE...all week. Just popped in to let you know that!

 

[jwann]

Hey Jennifer!!!! I thought about you at ALIVE...all week. Just popped in to let you know that!

Thanks TigerCheer, I hope the Spirit moved in you during the concert and God was glorified!

Just wanted to post to say that I'm sick with strep throat so I haven't been able to walk/run until I'm 100%. The kids are at camp this week and I had such high hopes of getting things done, not to mention the rendevous with the husband. Now it looks like I just have to rest and get better. I don't know who's more disappointed me or my dh!

 

[Lesli54]

Sorry to hear that you are not well. Hope things get better for you soon. Tell your DH that you will reschedule the rendezvous.

Sending for a speedy recovery.