Jeb outlaws tape recorders
Florida citizens urged to be on the lookout for these vile contraptions.
Tallahassee, Fl. -- Governor Bush issued an important warning to Floridians about the inherent dangers of so-called "tape recorders" today, as he quickly pushed a ban on the devices through state legislature. Anyone discovered to be in the possession of these hazardous electronic recording machines will face immediate detention.
"Based on anonymous warnings that I can't get into, I'm putting a ban on tape recorders immediately," said the Governor. "We'll look into instituting a waiting period on these devices in the future, once we're sure the citizens of Florida are safe."
Governor Bush denied that his latest act of swift leadership in the fight against terrorism had anything to do with recent politically-driven left-wing news reports that he was tape recorded making controversial comments.
Socialist news outlets have reported that the Governor had implied that a missing Miami girl's caretakers were "lesbian feminist Nazis" and that his position on smaller classroom sizes include "devious plans" like combining public schools and prisons.
Members of the media are the group most likely to be affected by the new ban on tape recorders, but Bush has graciously offered to give every journalist a printed copy of "approved statements" made by the Governor for use in their various publications.
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Florida citizens urged to be on the lookout for these vile contraptions.
Tallahassee, Fl. -- Governor Bush issued an important warning to Floridians about the inherent dangers of so-called "tape recorders" today, as he quickly pushed a ban on the devices through state legislature. Anyone discovered to be in the possession of these hazardous electronic recording machines will face immediate detention.
"Based on anonymous warnings that I can't get into, I'm putting a ban on tape recorders immediately," said the Governor. "We'll look into instituting a waiting period on these devices in the future, once we're sure the citizens of Florida are safe."
Governor Bush denied that his latest act of swift leadership in the fight against terrorism had anything to do with recent politically-driven left-wing news reports that he was tape recorded making controversial comments.
Socialist news outlets have reported that the Governor had implied that a missing Miami girl's caretakers were "lesbian feminist Nazis" and that his position on smaller classroom sizes include "devious plans" like combining public schools and prisons.
Members of the media are the group most likely to be affected by the new ban on tape recorders, but Bush has graciously offered to give every journalist a printed copy of "approved statements" made by the Governor for use in their various publications.
Jeb02.com Home
