I look forward to the day I will truly marry my everything. He is my best anything and all I could have ever wanted. There has not been one single moment in any day we have spent together that I have not known his arms and heart is where I want to spend my life here and in the next with. I have never questioned his love for me. Not once. Not for a millisecond.
I feel lucky to have had him been by my side for this long and only look forward to our lives being more blessed and growing together as we grow older.
My grandparents were the light of each others lives. Next door neighbors from 3 & 4 years old, married for 60 plus years and my grandpa gave me the best advice I could ever hoped for and I have held onto it forever.
When we had the wake and everyone had left but immediate family, he threw himself on her coffin, heaving, like his heart had been ripped from his chest. It took his 4, grown sons, to pry him off and he wailed on the floor like he had lost all emotion from his being. Like his suffering was an offer to God in hopes of bringing her back.
I never believed anyone could love me like that. I assumed I just would not have that connection in my life and although it broke my heart, it also strengthened my spirit because I felt so incredibly fortunate to have witnessed and been a part of anything attached to them.
Then there was Dan and I can only hope we can have 1/2 the years in marriage and life together that they did. At first I felt cheated but then, I realized that the hard times make me awe over what we have even more and there is not one piece of my life I would change because it would alter how beneficial I feel each moment I have with him.
This is how I feel about Brent. I feel a little cheated that I had not met him earlier even though our lives had intertwined many many times through out the years, starting when I was in MIDDLE SCHOOL(!), before we did meet when I was 28. But then I think about my children and how much I love them and how I would not have them if we had met earlier. Plus I was immature in my first marriage and it probably would not have worked out no matter who it was too(unless it way Taylor Lautner maybe, mmm mmm mmm).
Anyhow, I know I call him my husband now, its just easier and feels that way even though we aren't married. Someday, when the time is right we will get married. And you are right Dawn, it won't be about the wedding and all the details. It will just be about us and our kids and the he!! with anyone else and their opinions. Granted I will take into consideration what my close family and friends think, but outside of that this is my life. The time is just not now. He had a horrible divorce and his ex-wife is truly awful, so he is just scared to pull the trigger and do it again. I am ok with that and ok with being patient. I know he isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We want to have a special to us wedding when eventually do get married similar to what you are planning, but we have other financial obligations that we would like to finish up before we start our lives together.
Besides, we already live together, why do I need to buy the cow when I get the milk for free already?!
at your emotional purge but in a good way. I totally understand. Love is worth waiting for. I'm fortunate enough to have found my true love, the second time around, at a younger age. Thank you for reminding me how blessed I am by that fact. 
There are days I wish I hadn't been married twice, divorced etc. BUT I learned so much from my first marriage, of what to do and what not to do. And I wouldn't take anything for my son from my first marriage (or my second son for that matter.... 
(ok pick yourself off the floor) 
I said there aren't to many people out there these days that can say they have been married that long so we are going to do it big! First it was Hawaii but then he suggested europe. Hey you don't have to tell me twice. This trip has been 3 years in the making and we are so excited. 
You and Dan deserve it!
I guess I can't have everything
