Is there a man-code that says men can't diss each other?

[foolishmortal]

wow now there's a Thanksgiving the kids would remember...!!!!!

and a very good lesson, violence solves everything...

has anyone considered that the husband did nothing because he was trapped between a rock and a hard place..., on one hand his father was wrong with the way he handled things, on the other hand his wife was wrong for not addressing the issue beforehand with the adults, rather than getting the nine year olds hope up over the movie, and then sticking the nine year old in the middle . the average 9 year old would do the exact same thing if you tell them they can watch a dvd at a certain time, they will assume they have permission, and change channnels to watch the dvd,,,unfortunately the permission was indirectly granted by someone not in the room watching the tv, rather than those adults who were watching the game..

ITA,

My son who is almost 10 would have did this without me telling him. He would have just remembered 5 pm and thats that...the only difference is he would have put it in his room and invited everyone in there

Well I take that back my son would have been outside playing and would have forget everything I told him that day!!!

 

[GoofieRuthie]

I didn't take time to read ALL of the other posts, but the FIL was out of line. No ifs, ands, or buts! To act like that over a stupid ball game is extremely childish. The OP stated that in hindsight she should have mentioned it first, but it's too late for that now. Thankfully, football is not a tradition in my home nor any of my family's homes. So, this is something we don't have to deal with. Even if it were, Thanksgiving is a time for family, and I can't see anyone objecting to watching a wholesome movie as a family over a mere ball game. (puts on flame retardant suit now)

 

[Blueeyes101817]

i didnt read all the posts..but i wanted to comment---the FIL was definitely wrong for treating the son like that--there was no reason for that..

i know in my family, if someone turned off the game, it would not be a pretty sight...Football is a tradition here and about half of us sit and watch the game (males and females) no matter what the case, i feel bad that your son was yelled at!

 

[foolishmortal]

I didn't take time to read ALL of the other posts, but the FIL was out of line. No ifs, ands, or buts! To act like that over a stupid ball game is extremely childish. The OP stated that in hindsight she should have mentioned it first, but it's too late for that now. Thankfully, football is not a tradition in my home nor any of my family's homes. So, this is something we don't have to deal with. Even if it were, Thanksgiving is a time for family, and I can't see anyone objecting to watching a wholesome movie as a family over a mere ball game. (puts on flame retardant suit now)

no flaming from me but this part..hmmmmm.. one of the games on (actually the game in question) was the Denver Broncos and since I am born and raised here it wasn't just a mere game....lol.

I agree thnaksgiving is a time for family but the majority of my family is sports nuts so most already know what is going to be going on...games outside followed by games inside.

 

[mill4023]

wow now there's a Thanksgiving the kids would remember...!!!!!

and a very good lesson, violence solves everything...

has anyone considered that the husband did nothing because he was trapped between a rock and a hard place..., on one hand his father was wrong with the way he handled things, on the other hand his wife was wrong for not addressing the issue beforehand with the adults, rather than getting the nine year olds hope up over the movie, and then sticking the nine year old in the middle . the average 9 year old would do the exact same thing if you tell them they can watch a dvd at a certain time, they will assume they have permission, and change channnels to watch the dvd,,,unfortunately the permission was indirectly granted by someone not in the room watching the tv, rather than those adults who were watching the game..

Hence the reason I would never actually do something like that, especially in front of my children.

IMO, there is absolutely no excuse for treating a child that way, regardless of your opinion on anything else.

 

[foolishmortal]

Hence the reason I would never actually do something like that, especially in front of my children.

IMO, there is absolutely no excuse for treating a child that way, regardless of your opinion on anything else.

ITA with you as well, but this whole situation could have been avoided easily IMO.

 

[Chuck S]

Could he have moved YES, should he have moved YES. But does that give anyone the right to just up and change the channel or the likes, NO.

Except that his own disabled wife ALSO wanted to watch the movie with her grandson, or doesn't she count? Would SHE have had the "right" to switch it to a movie? If your answer is yes, why is it different situation if the child does it instead? His Mom told him that his grandma, she and he would watch the move at 5 o'clock. The "guys" were informed of this an hour prior (yes, by the child, it should have been an adult), so why didn't the DH have the common sense to be prepared and turn on another TV during a commercial and move the game group there earlier? Do you think FIL reaction would have been any different if the OP announced, "It is 5:00, we are changing to the movie, you guys need to go to the other TV to finish your game.?" I think the FIL would have had a similar reaction, he's just childish.

 

[disykat]

I still think some people here didn't really read the OP. The OP stated that she herself had told them they were watching a movie at 5 (followed by another anouncement by her son), she was the one who said "movie time" at 5. The son was involved by going up to the tv and putting in the video, something he chose to do himself - not a position he was put in. The OP, MIL, and DH were all telling the grandpa that there were other tvs and that this was not the son's fault - he just kept choosing to blame the 9 yo boy and throw his tantrum.

I don't consider it rude to give people an hour's notice that you'll be needing the tv, when there are clearly other tv's they can switch to - and commercial breaks they can do it in. They were given plenty of warning, not suddenly forced to switch for no reason during the best part of the game. The tv was needed for the group who wanted to watch the movie because MIL wanted to watch and the other tv's were not accessible to her.

I also maintain that unless hosting a super bowl party it is not the host's job to prearrange football watching for the guests.

 

[foolishmortal]

Except that his own disabled wife ALSO wanted to watch the movie with her grandson, or doesn't she count? Would SHE have had the "right" to switch it to a movie? If your answer is yes, why is it different situation if the child does it instead? His Mom told him that his grandma, she and he would watch the move at 5 o'clock. The "guys" were informed of this an hour prior (yes, by the child, it should have been an adult), so why didn't the DH have the common sense to be prepared and turn on another TV during a commercial and move the game group there earlier? Do you think FIL reaction would have been any different if the OP announced, "It is 5:00, we are changing to the movie, you guys need to go to the other TV to finish your game.?" I think the FIL would have had a similar reaction, he's just childish.

I never once said the FIL was in the right!!!

You are right an adult should have been the one to state that they want to watch the movie.

Also I am thinking they didn't hear the kid. If he is anything like my son he would come though the room (in passing) and say it but not make sure anyone heard it.

Sure the MIL has the right, but there should also have been the right to make sure EVERYONE was on the same page before just going in and changing the channel. If the child just said it in passing it may have been a total shock as they were enthralled in the game and didn't hear the child and were now mad because they felt like they were getting forced out.

 

[foolishmortal]

I still think some people here didn't really read the OP. The OP stated that she herself had told them they were watching a movie at 5 (followed by another anouncement by her son), she was the one who said "movie time" at 5. The son was involved by going up to the tv and putting in the video, something he chose to do himself - not a position he was put in. The OP, MIL, and DH were all telling the grandpa that there were other tvs and that this was not the son's fault - he just kept choosing to blame the 9 yo boy and throw his tantrum.

I don't consider it rude to give people an hour's notice that you'll be needing the tv, when there are clearly other tv's they can switch to - and commercial breaks they can do it in. They were given plenty of warning, not suddenly forced to switch for no reason during the best part of the game. The tv was needed for the group who wanted to watch the movie because MIL wanted to watch and the other tv's were not accessible to her.

I also maintain that unless hosting a super bowl party it is not the host's job to prearrange football watching for the guests.

I have to diagree..read this line from the OP

"OK, here is where I admit, we made a mistake. We did not inform the men that this was our plan ahead of time. We should of, and that is our fault. Still no excuse for what FIL did."

So they had no prior knowledge except for when the child annonced it..which again if he is like my son he would be running by saying it and not bother to see if anyone heard. By the actions of the "men" I would say they didn't hear the child, hence the reason the husband didn't say anything because he too was surprised, but being the wiser of the 2 just shut up and was willing to move but FIL wasn't smart and said things he shouldnt have said.

 

[poohbears5]

So, I told DS to announce to the men they had a one hour warning on the TV. The movie was going to be put in at 5PM. I said this loud enough for them to hear ME. DS gives them the message, and MIL and I chat The child should never have been put in the middle of this way childness on all the adults involved.

 

[foolishmortal]

.....

 

[foolishmortal]

So, I told DS to announce to the men they had a one hour warning on the TV. The movie was going to be put in at 5PM. I said this loud enough for them to hear ME. DS gives them the message, and MIL and I chat The child should never have been put in the middle of this way childness on all the adults involved.

I will be the first male to admit this to females....lol

If we are watching the game sometimes we don't fully hear what you have to say I know my wife doesn't fully listen to me when she's watching apprentice or ER....that's why I dis or play with my sons at that time.

It should have been understood well before an hour before anyway.