Is a Friday Night Weddding inconsiderate?

[lillygator]

op just send your regrets...I am sure if they knew how you felt they may rescind the invitation.

 

[Inigo]

Haven't read any responses but I'll just say you would HATE my DD's wedding this summer because it's on a THURSDAY night! We were surprised they picked it but after they explained, it did make sense. It's July 2nd and the next day, Friday, is the holiday for the 4th of July so we really were trying to make it easier for out-of-town guests to come, figuring most would have that day off.

See, I wouldn't go to your DD's wedding unless I was very close to her as I would have other plans for the holiday weekend, and probably wouldn't be able to make it to the wedding and for the holiday. But she's not having the wedding for my benefit, but for her's and her soon-to-be DH's, so who cares what I think.

 

[aprilgail2]

Haven't read any responses but I'll just say you would HATE my DD's wedding this summer because it's on a THURSDAY night! We were surprised they picked it but after they explained, it did make sense. It's July 2nd and the next day, Friday, is the holiday for the 4th of July so we really were trying to make it easier for out-of-town guests to come, figuring most would have that day off. We fully anticipate there will be some who simply can't do it and we understand and will be sorry they can't come. We're not so much "all about us" that we think people should go to great lengths to make it work out!

A holiday weekend would be a tough one too, many people have annual things they do for the 4th of July weekend, thats the week many business shut down for vacation so people go away.....and that Friday is not the holiday for most people I know, Monday is so it wouldn't work out anyway.

 

[barkley]

I only quoted your post because you mentioned a holiday weekend and I just happened to have mine on one.
I was just saying that it wouldn't have mattered if someone didn't want to come to mine because it was a Holiday weekend, but I was lucky that nobody seemed to care. Didn't take offense or mean to offend you with my response

just want to say that often times with a holiday weekend wedding it's not that someone does'nt want to come-they simply can't without much more notice than is traditionaly given to wedding guests.

we and a number of other invitees to a family member's wedding ran into this a few years back. the wedding was schedualed for a holiday weekend (holiday on sunday so most people were off work monday) and the b/g apparantly did'nt take into consideration that since the location was one where EVERYONE would have to travel at least 5 hours to reach (bride's parent's home location-NOONE save the bride's parents lived there) lodging was an absolute must. well, they must have considered it because they did provide information on lodging options in the wedding invite-BUT they did'nt take into consideration that since it was a holiday weekend all of the lodging was booked up for those dates 2-3 months before the invitations were sent out (and even if there had been availability it required a 3 nite minimum stay which for most people is a financial consideration in attending). i know the groom's parents are still offended for what they perceive as alllot of people's "not wanting" to attend their son's wedding-that was'nt the case at all, it simply was'nt possible given the date, time and location the b/g chose-and the amount (or lack of) advance notice.

the other issue with a holiday weekend (even if a wedding is local) is depending on the holiday (and where during that weekend the wedding falls) people can have other plans or work committments that much as they'de like to they can't change. at the place i retired from it was a minimum 6 month advance request to get the friday (or any portion of it) off before a monday 3 day weekend.


i think anyone planning a wedding needs to simply choose what their personal priorities are. if a particular day/date is make it or break it, despite the impact it may have on who can/will attend-then make the choice and stick to it (but don't give people who choose not to attend a 'bad time'), if having the greatest number of invitees being able to attend is a priority, then look to what you can reasonably anticipate as being the most convenient (so long as it's within your established budget-if it's not, then you need to look at your priorities again).


btw-for those who detest friday nite weddings: make some adventist friends. you'll never be invited to a wedding on a friday nite or anytime there's still daylight on a saturday. of course the trade off is at the wedding you'll also never get a cup of coffee, an alcoholic beverage or (in most cases) any food that contains meat (and don't even think about dancing).

 

[LoraJ]

Not everyone can take off early from work

Then they reply no on the invite and send a gift with their regrets.

 

[tzolkin]

We had a Friday evening wedding and I honestly didn't give much thought to it being "inconsiderate". The family that came from out of town stayed for the entire weekend and those that were close were within a 20 min drive.

Our wedding actually lasted most of the weekend. We got married Friday evening and then had a late dinner/reception with tents at my parents' home. Everyone either stayed at a hotel or at my parents' home. DH and I stayed that night at the inn that most of the guests were at and we had a formal brunch there Saturday morning. That afternoon we had a BBQ at my parents' and a bonfire that evening. My mom made breakfast the next morning for any guests still left and then they headed home.


My mom just went to a wedding a few weeks ago that was on a Thursday. The couple's families said this was becoming a common practice to get married on a weekday where they live.