Invited to twins birthday- gift for both?

[Pea-n-Me]

I think having same sex twins is different then having b/g twins even. By 12 my twins no longer wanted joint parties. If someone had brought DD a gift at DS's party she would have thought that was strange. Our kids have a lot of the same friends and they are VERY, VERY close but they don't want to have joint birthday parties any longer.

Sure, and every set is different. (Mine are boy/girl also.)

We have a large group of friends that we not only hang out with in daily life, but we vacation with, take day trips with, etc. It's natural for this whole group to be together, and there are kids of all different ages as well. We've offered alternatives but this is what they prefer.

As I said, to each his own.

 

[luvmy3]

I would probably bring a token gift for the brother, like an Itunes card or something. However at 12 years old I don't think its necessary to bring a gift to a child that your dd isn't friends with.

 

[golfgal]

Sure, and every set is different. (Mine are boy/girl also.)

We have a large group of friends that we not only hang out with in daily life, but we vacation with, take day trips with, etc. It's natural for this whole group to be together, and there are kids of all different ages as well. We've offered alternatives but this is what they prefer.

As I said, to each his own.

This isn't the same as what the OP is posting about though. If you are only inviting family friends then yes, the answer would be bring a gift for both but if you were inviting some friends that your DS only played with would you still expect a gift for your DD or vice versa??

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

I would probably bring a token gift for the brother, like an Itunes card or something. However at 12 years old I don't think its necessary to bring a gift to a child that your dd isn't friends with.

I agree, and I think its pretty insensitive of the parents to just put both kids names on the invitation. If the twins want a joint party fine, but why should you be expected to buy a gift for someone your DD isn't even friends with.

If she hung around with both of them, like a pp stated her twins do , fine. But it seems like these twins have different friends. And yea if an invite came with both twins names, I would feel like I had to buy a gift for both, which as I stated isn't fair because the mom is only paying once for your DD to attend.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

This isn't the same as what the OP is posting about though. If you are only inviting family friends then yes, the answer would be bring a gift for both but if you were inviting some friends that your DS only played with would you still expect a gift for your DD or vice versa??

I think I answered that in post #18.

 

[mjkacmom]

If she hung around with both of them, like a pp stated her twins do , fine. But it seems like these twins have different friends. And yea if an invite came with both twins names, I would feel like I had to buy a gift for both, which as I stated isn't fair because the mom is only paying once for your DD to attend.

Now that I think about it, dd13 has been inviting her friends to her parties either verbally or a text, for a couple of years now, same with ds11. I'm not making invitations for a 12 year old - they're old enough to do that themselves.

 

[hegsag]

I would buy a regular gift for your dd's friend and a much smaller gift ($5 range) for the brother.

 

[teacups]

I would buy a regular gift for your dd's friend and a much smaller gift ($5 range) for the brother.

Yup. This is what I am going to do.
I asked hubby what he thought and had to laugh when hubby looked at me like I was nuts for even thinking of buying the brother anything.

Sometimes I wish I lived in his world.

Thanks for all the ideas back and forth!

 

[mtemm]

if the invite says to both kids, bring a gift for both...or one they could share!

when I do invites for my twins, who still share a party (they are 5), I invite the boys to my son's, and the girls to my daughters, that way only one gift for people to buy (and less stuff in my house). some people do bring 2 gifts, but honestly I am happy to see people just bring to the twin they are invited to.

 

[Toot Sweet]

If the party is for both kids, you should get a gift for both kids. I am a twin and I remember birthday parties all too well. We particularly hated when people would get one gift for us to share. What the heck is that all about? We had our own rooms, how were we supposed to determine which room the present went in?

If your child is not friends with both children, then I agree about giving the other child a token gift or some money in a card.

 

[Skywalker]

I also think one gift, the one for your child's actual friend, is the way to go. I think of it like, if the daughter was not involved and just the son was holding a party would he invite your child? If not, no gift.

Not to rehash an old thread, but I did post about something somewhat similar back in May. But in my case the parents "helpfully" instructed on the invite that we were to buy two gifts, one for each boy, and furthermore, the gifts should be equal in value to avoid hurt feelings! lol But since my son was only friends with the one boy in this joint party, and the second boy would pass my son in the street and not even say hi, I did not obey their orders (after getting some much needed courage from the Dis). They are probably still talking about me, lol.

 

[teacups]

But in my case the parents "helpfully" instructed on the invite that we were to buy two gifts, one for each boy, and furthermore, the gifts should be equal in value to avoid hurt feelings! .

That is the rudest!