(Inspired) I Can't Believe They Did That-Inlaw Stories

[Nancyg56]

Then, one day, my Mom calls her and tells her that she needs to cut the crap and act right. She reminded MIL that her son chose me, not her. She doesn't need to like me, but she needs to tolerate me better. MIL called that night and apologized "for the last 10-years worth of s--- she gave me." That was 2-years ago and we've been good friends since. It opened her to spending time with her 2 oldest grandkids and we do things together now like before I married her son. It is the way things should have been for the last 12-years.

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!! You have one fiesty Mom!

 

[kbkids]

At aforementioned SIL's wedding, the photographer asked for all of her kids to get into a picture with her. When I went to get into the photo, she says that she only wants her children in the picture. There was no need to have a picture with me in it.

Same thing happened to me at DH's brother's wedding. They got married two months before us. DH was obviously not the favorite son, so consequently, I was certainly not the favorite DIL. His brother and his fiancee lived in a different town, so I never really did get to know them very well. MIL drove me nuts demanding that I was being selfish for not wanting to do a double wedding. - with practically a total stranger?? Don't think so! She said I was wasting everyone's money who was having to travel twice. Uh, even future SIL didn't want to do a double wedding. We honestly didn't even expect MIL to show up at the wedding, but she did - but trust me, the ceremony was planned purposely so that she could have been written out at the last minute.

Anyway, at DH's brother's wedding, when it came time for the pictures, they called for the family, DH (or would be in two months) stood up and reached for my hand. MIL said, "NO! He said family!" DH went to say something, but I stopped him, rolled my eyes, and said, "Consider the source."

 

[nealymouse]

The dinner story reminded me of something my IL and family did to DH and I.

I made Christmas dinner, Had everyone in DH family over. Had a ton of food, table set, It was fanstaste and I was beaming knowing I made Christmas dinner.

We were eating buffet style because we had a very small home. No one would get up to eat. I announced dinner several times and still no one ate.

DH and I figured we should start the line and still no one else was eating. What was going on !!!!

My DH then asked why no one was eating and his Mother said "Oh your sister in law (who was there) is having dinner for us later on and we dont want to ruin her dinner !!!!!

And the real boot was we were not invited to the latter dinner !!!!!

Last dinner I ever cooked for his family.

MIL was also not coming to our wedding (it was dh 2nd) We got married at my grand parents home over looking the ocean. My family was welthy (I AM NOT) and the house was very beauitful.

I was getting dressed upstairs in my childhood bedroom when my future SIL came in and sat down beside me and said "Well Beth we never expected you came from this" I looked her square in the eye and said "If you had known would you have been nice to me" (no one in DH family was ever nice to me EVER) She looked at me and walked away. My sisters and Mom were dying laughing.

 

[doxdogy]

Wow I am so grateful that I had great in-laws. FIL lived with us for about the last 10 years of his life and it was great. But DD's MIL is a piece of work. They had originally scheduled the wedding for Saturday March 13 but she pitched a fit and her son talked DD into changing the date. The reason...Saturday the 13th was bad luck. Then she stayed at their apartment to take care of the dogs while they were on their honeymoon and she totally rearranged all of their furniture. Went through the dresser drawers in the bedroom (looking for thumbtacks). DD had her wedding flowers hanging upside down to dry. She had even told her DON'T TOUCH THE FLOWERS. You got it, she moved them. She has made snide comments to DD in the past. Even told one of her granddaughters that she hated her (the kid was five). The reason, the granddaughter said the same thing to her. I have told DD to warn her husband that if his mother ever says anything bad about her in my hearing or tells one of her granddaughters that she hates them, that I will not keep my mouth shut.

 

[christineann]

My (thankfully, former) MIL's birthday is in early October. On September 21, 1989, we lost our house in hurricane Hugo. Five days before that happened, my 17 month old daughter had a finger taken off in a door and re-attached (MIL said that was no big deal when I called her to tell her).

She was furious with me that I did not send her a birthday card. She is one of the coldest people I have ever met..........haven't seen her or heard from her in 12 years

 

[kimmikayb]

This makes me not feel so alone. My MIL isn't that bad but she has her moments. She was suppose to bring all the plates, service, drinks and decorations for our rehersal dinner. One hour before it was to take place she told us she had returned it all to the store. At our rehersal she was suppose to say the prayer and when called upon, refused. She also wouldn't dance with DH.

She has told the rest of the family that I turn off DH's breathing machine at night and that DH keeps changing his cell phone number so she can't get ahold of him (same number for 5 years).

She can do anything she wants to me, but it breaks my heart to see how she makes my DH feel. Looks like we're not alone.

 

[Nancyg56]

I thought that my inlaws were whacked, and I guess that I am not alone. First of all, this is my second marriage, my first husband dies when I was 23. I adore his Mom and love his sister, and they are included in every family gathering. DH is fine with that, and would not tolerate it if they were treated with disrespect. Now his mother and sister are beyond the pale! He barely speaks to them because of the way they treat me and my family. Well, 2 years ago,his GM passed away, and he, his brother and his nephew were palll bearers. For some reason, the family did not get a car for the pall bearers. Amyway, the mother made no arrangement for me, and his sister was heard to say: "Just put her in the back of the pack." I did not say anything because my DH was seething by that time. Imagine their fury when these compassionate men walked out to my vehicle and stayed with me in the procession. After the service, the mother aandoned another sister in the cemetary because the other sister would not let her in the car. We sent her son to bring her with us. After the fiasco, my DH said that he cannot understand how they feel that their behavior towards me does not affecxt him, and why they continue to complain that he never visits, but don't care that he won't go without me. Why you ask? I am a widow who had 3 children, and I was not of the same ethnic background, therefore I was not an acceptable candidate for a DIL.

I could go on and on, but you get the drift. I just hope that they have a bunch of long term care insurance, because I won't be looking after either one if there is an illness.

 

[RUDisney]

I just hope that they have a bunch of long term care insurance, because I won't be looking after either one if there is an illness.

I always told my DH that no matter how badly his mother treated me throughout our marriage, that when she became too ill to live alone, we'd take her in. If only for that brief period of time she would have seen that I'm a good person and a fantastic wife for her DS, that would have repaid the years of torment.

My Mom was treated horribly by my Dad's family. Mom was the only female that tended to my GM's needs at the end. Her DD's said that the couldn't bear to see their mother like that. Her other DS said that he had a weak stomach... so Mom and Dad to the rescue. The thing my Mom will always remember is the night my GM told her that the reason why everyone treated her so badly is because they were all jealous of her relationship with my Dad and with their kids. She apologized to my Mom that night and when she died a few days later, her conscience was clear and although she won't forget all that happened over the years, she forgave my GM.

That's why I would help her in the end even if we had remained at odds. Thankfully it isn't so anymore. Yes, my Mom IS very fiesty. Thank God for that!

 

[Nancyg56]

I always told my DH that no matter how badly his mother treated me throughout our marriage, that when she became too ill to live alone, we'd take her in. If only for that brief period of time she would have seen that I'm a good person and a fantastic wife for her DS, that would have repaid the years of torment.

That's why I would help her in the end even if we had remained at odds. Thankfully it isn't so anymore. Yes, my Mom IS very fiesty. Thank God for that!

I would do anything that my wonderful DH wanted me to do. He has always been supportive when I have helped with my Mom and his cousin as well as my first husbands family when there was a need. I doubt that he would take this woman into our home because the way she treats me is indicative of the way she feels about him. She does not approve of teh way he makes his living and has always showed disdain, he is a truck driver and a farmer. Works long hours. Now when his Dad was ill, she refused to care for him and was going to place him in a nursing home, DH and his brother took turns working and sleeping in his room to make sure that he was cared for. We were not married at the time, but I went over during the day and looked after him, and fixed the family meals. I also shopped on weekends tomake sure that he had the things he needed. We both adored this man and wanted him to stay in the home he loved.
Now her Mom was too old to stay alone, she refused to bring her into her 5 bedroom home. This woman passed in a nursing home. Her sons first wife who she was horrible to visited her the most.

We have a beautiful little DGD who my DH adores. He has raised my children as though they were his own, but she is not a "blood" DGD. He took her with him to his sister's house when he went to visit his nephews. This nasty woman refused to even look at her. She was only 2 at the time. I think that this was his breaking point. He had trusted that she would not be so vicious towards an innocent baby.

He has never spoken to her or stepped foot into her home since then. He was opposed to inviting his mother into our home for a family gathering, but I did extend an invitation. She never even had the courtest to answer one way or another. For him the insult to me was the last he said he would overlook. What is sad is that I have been told that it is my fault that my DH avoids these members of his family, but the truth is that he avoids them because they cause him so much pain.

I am so glad the you were able to have a nice relationshil with your MIL, it is nice for you, but so much better for your DH. I know that I love my firat husbands mother, and have always ensured that my children have a strong relationship with this branch of our family. She has always recognized my Dh for the good husband, strong father, and wonderful loving Pa that he is and for this I am forever in her debt.

 

[agotta]

I am so glad that others have similar stories!!!

From day 1 my MIL never liked me. Was constantly telling DH that we shouldn't be so serious and he should date other girls. Well he was about to graduate college, I think this was in March and we told his parents we had decided to move in together. Well they just freaked. Absolutely not, there was no way there son would be doing this. Against everything they believe in. Well, if he did don't bother even trying to talk to them because they wouldn't be his parents.

So we decided to get married. MIL fought tooth and nail to move the wedding from January to June. Didn't want to help AT ALL (and I don't mean financially, which they didn't do either). The majority of his family, including maternal grandparents, refused to drive the 4 hours to our wedding. Oh and here's the kicker, his mom called my mom a month before the wedding trying to convince her to help her CALL OFF THE WEDDING!!

So now it's the night before our wedding. Dh told his parents to leave their house early because a huge snow storm was to hit along their path (Western Mass to Upstate NY). Well they left there house late, got half an hour away and MIL realized she FORGOT HER DRESS. It was the one thing she needed. Needless to say they hit the snowstorm and arrived in town right when our rehearsal was about to begin. Instead of heading straight to the church, they went to the hotel to freshen up and arrived just as we were finshing and heading to dinner.

Oh and it's my fault that DH hasn't gone for his masters yet...What a bad person I am Needless to say, his parents have caused some major problems.

 

[RUDisney]

Geez, Louise!

I wasn't trying to judge you about what you posted about assisted living insurance. I was just trying to offer a different perspective.

If my MIL was a narcassistic as yours, I'd have to go along with your thoughts... only I don't know that I'd hope that she could afford it. One of those sometimes reported, filthy state-funded nursing homes sounds more like the right place for that evil-monger.

While I'm sorry for the loss of your first DH... and so young, at that. I'm happy that you, your children and your DH have the relationship with your first MIL that you do. I'm sure that the children will treasure the time that they had with her when they are older and she is gone. The poetic justice in this is that you have had one of the best MILs... and that she is still in your life... still supportive of your life and your actions. You sound like a wonderful testament to the DS that she had.

 

[swanmom]

Ok....some of you have read my MIL stories before so I will try not to stir up more 'ill will.' But this most recent episode is pretty amusing. We were out-of-town when we got a call from our alarm company. The police were at our house because my MIL had set off our alarm when she let herself into the house. BUT she doesn't have a key, wasn't supposed to be there and lives three states away!!!! What happened? She knew that we were not going to be home and decided to visit a distant relative - using our house as a stop-over along the way. She did not ask us or tell us of her plans. I truly think to this day that, she planned to do this in secret, and wouldn't ever had told us she had been there if we hadn't found out. The key? Turns out she used our spare key to make a copy the last time she visited us (and then returned the spare key to its spot so we wouldn't know she had a copy made.) She only 'fessed up when confronted with the fact that the police told us she had a key on her when they arrived. In the past, I've locked up our financial records, etc. when she has visited because I know she snoops through everything - now I'm afraid she's got copies of those keys, too!!!! I guess she learned her lesson, though, we DO set the alarm when we're not home!

 

[Sandy V.]

Ok....some of you have read my MIL stories before so I will try not to stir up more 'ill will.' But this most recent episode is pretty amusing. We were out-of-town when we got a call from our alarm company. The police were at our house because my MIL had set off our alarm when she let herself into the house. BUT she doesn't have a key, wasn't supposed to be there and lives three states away!!!! What happened? She knew that we were not going to be home and decided to visit a distant relative - using our house as a stop-over along the way. She did not ask us or tell us of her plans. I truly think to this day that, she planned to do this in secret, and wouldn't ever had told us she had been there if we hadn't found out. The key? Turns out she used our spare key to make a copy the last time she visited us (and then returned the spare key to its spot so we wouldn't know she had a copy made.) She only 'fessed up when confronted with the fact that the police told us she had a key on her when they arrived. In the past, I've locked up our financial records, etc. when she has visited because I know she snoops through everything - now I'm afraid she's got copies of those keys, too!!!! I guess she learned her lesson, though, we DO set the alarm when we're not home!

Oh my goodness.

Looks like it's time to change the locks again.

After reading these in-law stories, I'm very grateful for mine. They irritate me at times, but nothing close to what some of you have endured.

 

[2sweetangels]

my in-laws are horrible, I can't stand them at all. Ever since I had my 1st DD in January 2004, my MIL started crap with us when DD was 2 weeks old, she wanted my DD to spend the night at her house every weekend after she was born and I said no and she went and started talking crap and thretened to call the state on us and grandmother's have legal rights, all over me not letting my newborn child stay the weekends with her, over the year things got worse, ok so 2nd DD was born August 2005 and things got worse and this time they actually did call the state on us and SIL told them all kinds of lies, like I had part of my brain removed, I was nuts and needed to be in the nut housr, I endanger my girl's, I beat my girl's, all these horrible lies. I only giving you all the nicest version of my in-laws that I can think of, if I got into detail's Iyou all would be reading for hours. I didn't even get into the horrible stuff MIL told her son, why and how he was conceived, that is just to horrible to write.

 

[Nancyg56]

Geez, Louise!

I wasn't trying to judge you about what you posted about assisted living insurance. I was just trying to offer a different perspective.

I know, and I appreciated your story.

If my MIL was a narcassistic as yours, I'd have to go along with your thoughts... only I don't know that I'd hope that she could afford it. One of those sometimes reported, filthy state-funded nursing homes sounds more like the right place for that evil-monger.

While I'm sorry for the loss of your first DH... and so young, at that. I'm happy that you, your children and your DH have the relationship with your first MIL that you do. I'm sure that the children will treasure the time that they had with her when they are older and she is gone. The poetic justice in this is that you have had one of the best MILs... and that she is still in your life... still supportive of your life and your actions. You sound like a wonderful testament to the DS that she had.

I hope that she feels that way. It was hard for her and my FIL because the loss made them so raw, so I was happy that we both made the effort. Initially it was for the kids, but was both know that we benefited also.

 

[Stitchfans]

All I can say is it feels good to know I am not the only one who has horrible in laws. the only normal, decent one in DHs family was his dad who passed away 11 yrs ago and his brother. MIL and SIL's are pure evil. I have nothing to do with them and never ever will. Much happier this way.

 

[disneydiva58]

When I was engaged years ago my mother had passed away of breast cancer.I was living at home with her at the time.I have a very small family ,only sis and I .My soon to be husband was very supportive and with me alot during the last weeks of her life.WELL...fast forward to the wake-funeral... my sister and I,along with my future husband were sitting in the front row and my future MIL comes into the funeral parlor,says her prayer at the casket and then walks up to all of us in the front row.She bends down,kisses HER son(my future hubby) and proceeds to tell him "Just remember you are still MY SON"....Never a word spoken to me no condolences...nothing!!!! What an evil evil woman.This happened 18 years ago and it still Pisses me off. As fate would have it, we ended up breaking the engagement and I have been married to a wonderful caring man and to top it off...I HAVE THE BEST MIL IN THE WORLD now!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[RUDisney]

my in-laws are horrible, I can't stand them at all. Ever since I had my 1st DD in January 2004, my MIL started crap with us when DD was 2 weeks old, she wanted my DD to spend the night at her house every weekend after she was born and I said no and she went and started talking crap and thretened to call the state on us and grandmother's have legal rights, all over me not letting my newborn child stay the weekends with her, over the year things got worse, ok so 2nd DD was born August 2005 and things got worse and this time they actually did call the state on us and SIL told them all kinds of lies, like I had part of my brain removed, I was nuts and needed to be in the nut housr, I endanger my girl's, I beat my girl's, all these horrible lies. I only giving you all the nicest version of my in-laws that I can think of, if I got into detail's Iyou all would be reading for hours. I didn't even get into the horrible stuff MIL told her son, why and how he was conceived, that is just to horrible to write.

OMG!!! How long did it take you to get the state off your back? AND, most importantly, did you file a PFA against them so they can't come within so many feet of you or your house!?!

 

[mickeysgal]

OMG! I read the first OP and I thought that that story was horrible. Now I'm on page 3 and each story is worst than the next. Its just so sad - how do people warp into being so cruel and unfeeling?

Gotta love family! NOT!

 

[Marseeya]

My MIL did this before I ever met DH, but it set the tone for her future relationship with DH and me. This story is over 15 years old, so it may have some inaccuracies, but this is it as best as I can recall.

His mom and dad got divorced when he was 16 or so. It was a bitter, nasty divorce and MIL tried to take FIL to the cleaners. DH really went through a tough time with it, having to switch schools his senior year and had to move to another town, then she got together with a guy who was really awful to DH and his younger brother.

Anyway, MIL always told DH that FIL wouldn't pay child support and she constantly bad-mouthed FIL to DH, filling him with lie after lie.

When it came time for DH to go off to college, MIL told DH that it was in the divorce agreement that FIL would pay something like 80% of tuition and MIL would pay 20%, although she cried that she couldn't afford even that. She claimed that FIL refused to pay, so DH had to come up with the money on his own. He took a full time job and tried to put himself through school. After a while, he realized he just couldn't swing it, so he tried getting student loans, which as you may or may not know, at his age he couldn't do it on his own since he was considered a dependant. He tried getting his mother to help him with a student loan, but she gave him this whacked story.

She said that she had taken FIL to court over the college issue and the judge decreed that she couldn't apply for the student loan until FIL paid his share of tuition. She told DH he just had to do it on his own or drop out. Again, he would have gladly gotten the loans himself, but he couldn't until he turned 24/25 or whatever age it is that you're no longer a dependant.

Fast forward to our marriage and he told me this whole thing. I told him that it was totally messed up and couldn't be accurate -- no judge would make a stupid ruling like that. I ended up talking to FIL's wife and we got to talking about it and FIL totally flipped out when he found all this out. It turned out that he had been paying the tuition all along but was sending checks to MIL. She took all that money for herself, and told FIL that DH dropped out because of his grades.

When DH tried to find out his mother's side of the story, all she would say was that he just didn't understand her point of view. What's to understand??? Oh, and to add insult to injury, about a month after all this came to light, MIL decided to go back to college herself and just raved on and on to DH about it.

There are plenty more stories where that came from too.