Inspired by recent wedding threads: 2nd (or 3rd) Weddings

[happybratpack]

Trying to figure out how to word this.

For those who have been married more than once, did your second (or third or whatever) weddings feel "less" to you than your first? Like you didn't have that same feeling, excitement, etc? Did you do a big or fancy wedding for one other than your first?

and

If you're invited or hear of someones 2nd (or whatever) wedding, are you less inclined to celebrate or go to the ceremony? Do you think someone should do the registry, showers, big wedding if it's not their first?

I'm NOT trying to start anything, I'm just really curious. I think you should just do what feels right, but this was a big debate here today and then the various wedding threads on here so thought I'd ask.

 

[disneymama73]

The first time I was married, we eloped, but my parents gave us a casual reception a few months later.

When I married for the 2nd time, I had the big blow-out church wedding with a fancy reception.

 

[Aidensmom]

My first marriage we eloped, my second marriage we had a church ceremony and reception, and did the registry thing. The same feeling and excitement was there, and actually even more so the second time. Our friends and families did not have a problem with having all that for my second marriage (and it was DH's first marriage). If the people we invited felt we were wrong to do so, they are entitled to their opinion, but it wouldn't influence my decision.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

If I ever get married again I'm hitting Vegas. Elvis can marry us.

I had the big blow-out the first time. It was NOT what I or my ex wanted. But because we were both only children, our mothers wanted a huge party because it was their "only chance." I don't remember much of it, but I really didn't enjoy it. If I do it again, I hope to have something very small and informal.

 

[Shugardrawers]

In formality and cost, both my weddings were about the same. I wore a real gown and veil both times. I was divorced 10 years before I married Dh and I looked long and hard for just the right one. This time I was much more excited about the marriage than the wedding. I don't care if someone has been married 10 times, if you are close enough to be invited you should be happy that they at least think they've found the real thing. It's kind of like having multiple grandchildren. The first may be something new but that doesn't make any subsequent ones less important or exciting.

I didn't have a shower the 2nd time because I had recently moved there and really didn't know anyone to invite. I did get gifts from family and friends and truly appreciated it. Both of us were coming into this with pretty much nothing and needed everything. I think it really depends on the circumstances of the couple. Many 2nd marrieds don't really need toasters and towels but a lingerie shower for the bride is always fun or a ladies luncheon instead of a shower.

Weddings are a time to celebrate love and hope. Just because it went belly up the last time doesn't mean the person is any less deserving of your best wishes and congratulations.

 

[happybratpack]

Weddings are a time to celebrate love and hope. Just because it went belly up the last time doesn't mean the person is any less deserving of your best wishes and congratulations.

Very good way to put this, I wish I had said it that well at lunch when we were all debating it.

 

[PoohPrincess76]

We decided on Sunday to get married the following Saturday when I married my first husband. His parents threw us a small reception for his family with a promise for a second with my family in the near future. The second never happened. So, when DH and I got married in July we did the church wedding and bigger reception. We had about 100 guests. It was perfect for us and just what we wanted. I got a bridal shower this time, and didn't feel akward about it being a second since I never really had a "first" to enjoy with my friends and family.