Insp. By The Hillary Thread, The Cheating Factor...

[eclectics]

Whenever these Hillary threads come up I must say that I'm amazed at the number of women who seem to be MOST upset with her because she stayed with Bill and that her politics seem to come in second. I also wonder, if the same situation happened to them IRL, would they be so cavalier in tossing their cheating hubby under the bus. Ladies, and Gents also, any thoughts?

 

[Disney Doll]

You know, I think the public humiliation of it would have caused me to leave.

I mean, normal (and by that I mean not public figures) women get cheated on every day. Some marriages survive, some don't. But I don't think most normal wives have to deal with knowing every detail...the cigar thing, the blue dress, the "stains" and so forth. The "idea' of the cheating is sort of "nebulous" for normal women...you know there was someone else, but you don't really know what they did, where, when, how often and so on. You don't have to hear a blow by blow (no pun intended ) description of everything. You don't have to listen to your husband try and wrangle out of everything. You don't see the woman's face on every magazine, newspaper, the nightly news.

There's a part of me that can give her credit for staying and presumably fixing it. There's a part of me that thinks she's pathetic for staying. There's a part of me that thinks she's conniving for staying, if the only reason she stayed was to try and ascend to the Presidency. I don't know how much of my soul, my "self" I'd be able to give up for power.

 

[Sandy V.]

You know, I think the public humiliation of it would have caused me to leave.

I mean, normal (and by that I mean not public figures) women get cheated on every day. Some marriages survive, some don't. But I don't think most normal wives have to deal with knowing every detail...the cigar thing, the blue dress, the "stains" and so forth. The "idea' of the cheating is sort of "nebulous" for normal women...you know there was someone else, but you don't really know what they did, where, when, how often and so on. You don't have to hear a blow by blow (no pun intended ) description of everything. You don't have to listen to your husband try and wrangle out of everything. You don't see the woman's face on every magazine, newspaper, the nightly news.

There's a part of me that can give her credit for staying and presumably fixing it. There's a part of me that thinks she's pathetic for staying. There's a part of me that thinks she's conniving for staying, if the only reason she stayed was to try and ascend to the Presidency. I don't know how much of my soul, my "self" I'd be able to give up for power.

That sums it up for me too.

 

[Honu]

I guess I'm somewhat guilty of that. I wouldn't throw anyone under the bus for trying to make their marriage work, but I think in that whole fiasco Hillary came off as very cold and unsympathetic. I think many people have trouble relating to her, and liking her, because she doesn't show her emotions.

I have a hard time trusting in someone that is so guarded. So while I agree with her politics, I would have a hard time voting for her.

 

[JunieJay]

I think the people who complain about her staying would be the first to throw her under the bus if she left.

I've come to the conclusion some people (surprisingly many of them women) don't like her because she isn't demure. No matter what she does, they aren't going to like her.

Personally, I admired her for staying with her husband through thick and thin. I can't say what I would do for sure, but I'm inclined to say that I would stick it out as long as he wasn't in love with the other woman. If it were just a physical thing, I think I could get past it with lots of therapy (think being the operative word! ).

 

[SwedishMeatball]

I don't think she's pathetic and I never looked at her as standing by her man. If she didn't have political ambitions, I think she would have left him. It was a calculated decision with the end goal being POTUS. In her mind, the end will justify the means. I used to feel some pity for her, but she made her choices and seems fine with it. She's determined, I'll give her that.

 

[tonilea]

I don't think it would have been so bad if she hadn't said she wasn't a country music stand-by-your-man-woman and sounded so...I dunno. That left a foul taste in my mouth. Besides, this wasn't BC's first rodeo. He was accused of cheating while the govener of Arkansas.

 

[Nikel]

I guess I'm somewhat guilty of that. I wouldn't throw anyone under the bus for trying to make their marriage work, but I think in that whole fiasco Hillary came off as very cold and unsympathetic. I think many people have trouble relating to her, and liking her, because she doesn't show her emotions.

I have a hard time trusting in someone that is so guarded. So while I agree with her politics, I would have a hard time voting for her.

Women in politics are pretty much in between a rock and a hard place, IMO. If a woman shows her emotions, she's weak and not a good leader. If she plays the game and keeps her emotions under wraps, she's cold and heartless. It's a no win situation, and it's complete garbage, IMO.

Her marriage is none of my business and really makes no difference in if I'll vote for her or not. I really don't get why we (Americans) are so concerned about everyone else's sex life.

 

[eclectics]

I don't think she's pathetic and I never looked at her as standing by her man. If she didn't have political ambitions, I think she would have left him. It was a calculated decision with the end goal being POTUS. In her mind, the end will justify the means. I used to feel some pity for her, but she made her choices and seems fine with it. She's determined, I'll give her that.

That's what I'm trying to figure out. Do the women (and men too) that fault her for staying with Bill think she was weak to stay with a cheating spouse, or do they feel it was merely a cold calculated decision and that she feels nothing for Bill anymore? Whenever I hear "I hate her for staying with him", nobody seems to elaborate as to why.

 

[wvjules]

I don't think she's pathetic and I never looked at her as standing by her man. If she didn't have political ambitions, I think she would have left him. It was a calculated decision with the end goal being POTUS. In her mind, the end will justify the means. I used to feel some pity for her, but she made her choices and seems fine with it. She's determined, I'll give her that.

Isn't it possible she stayed with Bill because *gasp* she loves him? Why does everyone automatically assume she stays/stayed with him for political reasons?

 

[JunieJay]

Isn't it possible she stayed with Bill because *gasp* she loves him? Why does everyone automatically assume she stays/stayed with him for political reasons?

I've always thought she stayed because she loved him. You can tell by the way she looks at him. I remember one candid shot of them walking along the beach (this pic is pretty recent) where they looked completely in love. Pictures say a lot, imo, not to mention their long marriage prior to the affairs. I really doubt she stayed with him all these years because she's ambitious.

 

[SwedishMeatball]

That's what I'm trying to figure out. Do the women (and men too) that fault her for staying with Bill think she was weak to stay with a cheating spouse, or do they feel it was merely a cold calculated decision and that she feels nothing for Bill anymore? Whenever I hear "I hate her for staying with him", nobody seems to elaborate as to why.

I think people who already don't like her can just spin this to use it as another reason. Personally, I think it's rather amazing how she is able to present herself in a rather emotionally detached manner in regards to this topic. We'll never know what goes on behind closed doors. I always got the impression that her overall emotion towards Bill was annoyance. As if she didn't care so much what he did, but have the common sense not to get caught and have it paraded for all to see. I'm sure she's shed her fair share of tears, but I think she made up her mind to carry on. I think it just made her resolve that much more stronger. I don't agree with her on much politically, but this is an area that is just not of much interest to me.

 

[eclectics]

I've always thought she stayed because she loved him. You can tell by the way she looks at him. I remember one candid shot of them walking along the beach (this pic is pretty recent) where they looked completely in love. Pictures say a lot, imo, not to mention their long marriage prior to the affairs. I really doubt she stayed with him all these years because she's ambitious.

FWIW, that's what I always thought also. I personally think it takes a lot of strength and courage to forgive someone who cheats on them. Abuse is a whole different story, of course.

 

[SwedishMeatball]

Isn't it possible she stayed with Bill because *gasp* she loves him? Why does everyone automatically assume she stays/stayed with him for political reasons?

Anything is possible. She hasn't done much to convince people otherwise imo. I don't think she presents herself that way to the public. Ambition isn't a dirty word.

 

[Pigeon]

What I find humorous is that so many people who absolutely hate her are from the so-called religious right, who expouse the family values baloney out their ears. So, here's a woman who decided to try to make her marriage work, and she's villified for it.

 

[Crankyshank]

I've always thought she stayed because she loved him. You can tell by the way she looks at him. I remember one candid shot of them walking along the beach (this pic is pretty recent) where they looked completely in love. Pictures say a lot, imo, not to mention their long marriage prior to the affairs. I really doubt she stayed with him all these years because she's ambitious.

I always thought the same thing. I mean seriously, wth are we to judge why someone decides to stay in their marriage? Shouldn't we be applauding someone who decided to stay and make her marriage work when we've become such a throw away society?

When I've heard her talk about Bill, there's always been affection in her voice. I saw the same picture of them on the beach and it definitely looks like 2 people who have great affection and love for each other.

 

[Holly]

That's what I'm trying to figure out. Do the women (and men too) that fault her for staying with Bill think she was weak to stay with a cheating spouse, or do they feel it was merely a cold calculated decision and that she feels nothing for Bill anymore? Whenever I hear "I hate her for staying with him", nobody seems to elaborate as to why.

Probably because they don't know why. They feel threatened by a strong woman and feel the need to be critical.

One can only guess the specifics of the Clinton's private relationship.

I often hear her criticized for staying with him by the same people who attack her femininity. She's cold, she's a *****, she's a lesbian- the typical ways in which a strong woman is maligned.

Remember what a martyr Kobe Bryant's wife was painted as? That poor woman sitting there looking so sad and demure and wearing a cross. People made such a big deal out of how great it was that she stood by her man and made her marriage work. Why is it so different for Hillary?

 

[eclectics]

I think people who already don't like her can just spin this to use it as another reason. Personally, I think it's rather amazing how she is able to present herself in a rather emotionally detached manner in regards to this topic. We'll never know what goes on behind closed doors. I always got the impression that her overall emotion towards Bill was annoyance. As if she didn't care so much what he did, but have the common sense not to get caught and have it paraded for all to see. I'm sure she's shed her fair share of tears, but I think she made up her mind to carry on. I think it just made her resolve that much more stronger. I don't agree with her on much politically, but this is an area that is just not of much interest to me.

I think she (and he also) have been trying to hang onto any amount of privacy that they can, in an affair that was very, very public.


As for annoyance, I can relate! lol. When you've lived with someone for 16 years, annoyance is pretty much a given!

 

[Mkrop]

Probably because they don't know why. They feel threatened by a strong woman and feel the need to be critical.

One can only guess the specifics of the Clinton's private relationship.

I often hear her criticized for staying with him by the same people who attack her femininity. She's cold, she's a *****, she's a lesbian- the typical ways in which a strong woman is maligned.

Remember what a martyr Kobe Bryant's wife was painted as? That poor woman sitting there looking so sad and demure and wearing a cross. People made such a big deal out of how great it was that she stood by her man and made her marriage work. Why is it so different for Hillary?[/QUOTE]


Who in the world thought that?

I think her and Hillary "stood by their men" for the same reason- money and power.

 

[rie'smom]

My friend's husband was on SS detail. He said no love lost between Bill and Hil. Could barely stand the sight of each other. Staying with him was politically expedient. This guy was there for all 8 years. She's foul mouthed and a bully. Not my words, he was there.