Lisa, you've touched on one of the reasons I hate the holidays. It all just seems so superficial and hollow. My in-law clan holiday turns into a who can outdo whom fest, since my BIL is very well-off and uses the occasion to lavish gifts on his not-well-off parents (which, I do understand), but it makes D try and keep up with the Joneses (which, ironically, we already are).

lmao:

)
So, the net result is that my in-laws spend too much money that they don't have on us, rather than keeping it which is what they should do, and then mine feels bad because we can't keep up, etc. Fun times. I wish we could go to name in a hat but that never seems to work.
And this year, it is even worse because we are giving all of them a family fiasco of a WDW vacation (BIL is paying for tickets and food and we are kicking in 300 DVC points) yet I imagine we will still have to get stuff. Sigh.
And my family, is even worse because I barely even know my brother, so we exchange a bunch of hollow crap that was either previously requested, or turns into gift cards. I hate gift cards* as I think they totally go against the spirit of gift giving.
*Except in the case of, say, a new grad that is furnishing a house, or giving something to someone not a loved one like a teacher, pet-sitter, etc.
Okay, rant over.