Thank you guys for the answers. I'm glad it came across as I intended, curious, not troublesome.
I agree with Kate that it is a balancing act, even though I've never had to deal with a lot of these issues. I also think it's a balancing act in a different way. Expectations vs Experiences/Accomodations. I think everyone should be given a way to experience Disney with their accomodations, regardless of disease, syndrome, handicap or issue, within reseasonable expections. My post really stemmed from seeing lots of posts about how Disney should be doing more for those with autism or austitic like disorders. I've always thought Disney goes way out of their way this type of thing, and not to keep using the word, but how far realistically could they be expected to go? I think the people on this forum, for the most part, try to educate themselves and figure out touring plans that will work best for them, using the accomodations in ways that work best for their situations. It's the people who....blow it out of proportion for lack of a better term....expecting to be accomodated in ways that are perfect for their austistic child and get angry when things don't happen immediately or exactly how they want that confuse me. I don't mean to say that the majority is like that, or that it's wrong to want something that will help, just how do people find that realistic balance that gives them a good trip.
I think, for me, the balancing act is taking things one step at a time. I plan, a lot, even for a day trip to
Disneyland (I live 6 miles away), and then I do my best to take my needs one by one. If something is not working, I talk to the nearest CM about how to make things work better. If it cannot work that time, I move on to the next thing.
I too have encountered those few people who go over the top in their demands. In general, it seems to be those people who play the "I/my kid is worse" game, and want Disney to change their policies on the spot to suit their needs, either real or perceived. For example, there are times the wheelchair/alternate entrance to Peter Pan is very long in Disneyland. There can only be one wheelchair/mobility need on at a time, so the line can move slowly. I have had people, usually with children with some need, go right past me and explain that they
know there is a line but their kids has [fill in the blank] and needs to go
right now. So, yeah, we encounter this sometimes too.
I think the most important thing to remember is that Disney is supposed to be the happiest place on earth, and that things are never going to go as planned. There will always be SOME issue that pops up (like finding out the wheelchair boat on Jungle Cruise died that time, so I could not ride it as planned). Or the time that I had two VERY rude elderly people on WDW scooters cut in front of me at American Adventure, then refuse to go all the way across the row. When I told them to continue moving, as they were holding up the line, the man got irate and began shouting. I just tell myself karma gets them in the end. Because they cut in front of me, they had to sit all the way down the end in the worst seats in the house. I knew this, so I let them cut me. They can be snippy and rude, but I still got the best seat in the house.
Also, I got to sit with a very nice young man in a wheelchair (at that point about age 25) who was dying from a brain tumor. His mom, who was caring for him, knew I was on my honeymoon, but waited til we were all in the theatre and then told me her son thought I was cute. It made him turn BRIGHT red (sons are never too old for mothers to embarrass!). It was one of the highlights of my honeymoon, honestly. By this point, the young man has probably passed on, but I will always remember his bright red face and him telling his mom to shush.
Balance is important. I know my rights and I know disney policy, but I also know that things don't always work perfectly. So I just do the best I can and take it as it comes.