"I'll Pray For You" - Article from yesterday's newspaper

[Towncrier]

My wife took the time to read this article from the Saturday Akron Beacon Journal to me this morning. It really struck a nerve. I've seen this topic come up time and again, and I thought that Terry Pluto really hit the nail on the head with this excerpt from his book.

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If you say, `I'll pray,' then do it


Last in a series of excerpts from Terry Pluto's new book, Everyday Faith.

I'll pray for you.

How many times have you heard someone say that? How many times have you said it? And how many times have you actually prayed for the person?

I don't want the IRS auditing my account on this item.

Most of the time, when someone says they'll pray for me, I want to believe it. But I sort of doubt it.

Countless times, people have asked me to pray for them...

And I said I would...

And I didn't.

The words sometimes sound lame as they come from my lips: "I'll pray for you.''

I've even said it to people to shut them up. They start telling me their troubles. I've heard some of the problems before. Or, maybe, I just don't want to hear them now.

And I know I can't do anything about them.

"That's too bad,'' I say. "I'll pray for you.''

And I'm gone.

Great. "I'll pray for you'' has been turned into an exit line. I bet God is thrilled with that.

I've had people tell me, "I'm praying for you.'' And I'm amazed they'd take time to pray for me, given all the problems they must have in their own lives.

These people usually are very dedicated to their prayer life. They keep lists. They look at the names and the notes next to the names. They take time to raise those names and prayers to God.

I'm not one of those people.

I doubt most people are those people.

So what does it mean to say, "I'll pray for you''?

Absolutely nothing -- unless someone actually prays.

A few years ago, I heard a minister admit he had a lousy memory and rarely remembered to pray for anyone. That did wake up the folks in the pews, a few of whom were probably praying for a shorter sermon.

The minister said his new approach was this: If someone asks him to pray, he prays.

Right then.

He may take the person's hands and just pray for him. Or put a hand on the person's shoulder. He'll make some sort of contact and then raise words and hearts to the Lord.

Why not?

How long does it take? You don't have to recite the entire Old Testament. Just pray: Someone is sick, someone just lost a job, someone is thankful.

Take a moment, talk to God about it.

At the very least, you kept your word. You promised to pray, and you did. And the person knows you prayed because the person was there with you -- hopefully, praying, too.

Several years ago, I was going through a spiritual crisis as my father was in a long battle with a stroke that eventually led to his death. I mentioned the trials and frustrations to a member of the clergy, who sympathized and promised to pray for me.

And he was gone.

I told this story to a friend, who at the time was challenging me to read the Bible, to get serious about faith.

"You mean the guy didn't even pray with you?'' he asked.

I shrugged.

"Let's pray now,'' he said.

He took my hands. He prayed that I'd have the strength to handle whatever came next, that God would help me financially with the mounting bills, and that my father would find peace and comfort as he dealt with the debilitating stroke.

I'm sure he stumbled around through the prayer, but it sounded like poetry. This guy was talking to God for me.

"That's prayer,'' he said. "Talking to God with respect, but also like you know God.''

For years, I was uncomfortable praying out loud. I figured I sounded stupid to the people around me, but even dumber to God.

I finally came to the conclusion that God isn't grading on style points.

It's the heart.

Now, I try to pray for people on the spot. A few months ago, a woman at a fast food place told me about raising a child alone and how she had applied for a new job with more pay. She asked me to pray for her.

Right at the drive-through window, I prayed something about getting the job, taking care of her daughter and giving her peace about what happened. It took about 30 seconds.

A week later, she said, "Hey, I got that job. Thanks for the prayer.''

I felt better than she did -- at least at that moment.

Some people can pray up a storm; others do it in barely a whisper.

Don't compare yourself to others. Besides, God seems to favor the person in the back of the church, head down, heart breaking, the only words coming out being: "Lord, I am a sinner; God, please help me... ''

Yes, God does hear our prayers, even if he doesn't answer them as we want, or when we want.

I need to keep reminding myself of that because it's so easy not to pray, or just to run through some ragged prayer like: "Bless us, Lord, and these thy gifts, pass the corn, and don't forget the fish.''

There have been times when I've tried to pray about something and didn't know what to say. The situation was such a hopeless mess, words seemed useless. Often, praying with someone else, letting them pray for me, has helped me.

Having guts enough to ask someone to pray along with you -- that may be one of the best prayers of all.


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From Everyday Faith: Practical Essays on Personal Faith and the Ethical Choices We Make in Everyday Life ($19.95, hardcover, 224 pages). Available in Northeast Ohio bookstores, the Akron Beacon Journal Public Service Counter and online from Amazon.com. Published by Gray & Co., 800-915-3609, www.grayco.com. Originally published in the Beacon Journal on Oct. 26, 2002.

 

[ASFCurly]

I have to say, up until several years ago, when people used to ask me to pray for them, most of the time I forgot and it never ended up happening, then a couple of years ago, someone asked me if I really prayed for someone when they asked, I said sometimes, but a lot of the time I forgot, and they said that do it right then and there, no matter what they are doing, so that they don't have to worry about forgetting later, they have already done it. So I started doing just that, and have ever since.

 

[tiggersmom2]

Yep, I always stop what I am doing and I pray right then and there.

 

[DoeWDW]

Whenever I say I'll pray for someone, I do it right then, or I'd forget. I especially do this when I'm DISing and someone asks for prayers. I often remember the situation later that day or a few days later, and I pray again, right then.

 

[KristaTX]

Originally posted by DoeWDW
Whenever I say I'll pray for someone, I do it right then, or I'd forget. I especially do this when I'm DISing and someone asks for prayers. I often remember the situation later that day or a few days later, and I pray again, right then.

Me too. This is how I pray for strangers on the DIS and also for family/friends (DIS or otherwise). If I say I'll pray then I pray right then. Later, as thoughts of that person/situation enter my mind, I pray to God on their behalf again. Usually my prayers are just a few sentences long (if they can even be described in such grammatical terms), but they are all a part of a kind of continuing conversation with God.

Krista

 

[Otto's Doll]

I do the same thing as the above two posters. I find if I pray right then, God will often bring the person/situation to my mind again later for more prayer. This was a great article, John. Thanks.

 

[LucyStorm]

Another right then pray-er. Most time it can only be a one liner--Please God help Jane Doe thru this--now how long does that take?

God hears all prayers, no matter how long, how short, how eloquent or not. It's what is in your heart that counts.

God bless all of you....

 

[Pembo]

Believe it or not, I miss reading those columns by Terry Pluto in the ABJ.

Thanks for that one!

 

[Towncrier]

I ordered Terry Pluto's book this afternoon. I am looking forward to reading the rest of the book that this clip is from.

For the record, much like Bonnie, I say a prayer right then and there. I also make the effort to remember all those who have asked for prayers during the time of silent prayer during Sunday worship services.

And I don't always reply to threads asking for prayers. But I do say a prayer for those folks as well. And most recently I have been saying many prayers of thanksgiving for the quick and relatively painless healing that I have been blessed with.