if anyone can help.....

[Robbya]

Hey guys
I was just hoping to get some pixie dust my way....a day ago i had to break up with my girlfriend and it has really been hard. She was my first true girlfriend and i am in a state of feeling as if im back to square one and no one will ever want to go out with me again...i know this is probably dumb...but well...i suppose i have a very tough time actually coming up to girls to say hi since i just dont know how to do it....wow this is a lot of typing and it probably makes no sense but thanks for listening

 

[splashmountain86]

I know exactly how you are feeling at this point, and i agree with you that it is not a great feeling. I have recently been going through some tough times with my girlfriend and understand how it feels to be "lost" when you are not with the one you feel so strongly about. Luckily, things have been getting back to normal for me, but i feel if it were not for my family and friends this would not be the case. So my advice to you is look towards your family and friends (including all DISers) for support and as a way to keep your mind off the difficult situation you are in. I know it feels like you will never find another person that "gets you", but dont give up hope.

I will send some pixie dust your way!

Best,
SM86

 

[miss missy]

I sure know nothing hurts like heart ache from a break up. When I was young, I actually went to the ER saying it hurt in my chest. They did tests and nothing was wrong. I didn't realize till I got older and went through that again, it was actually heartache Physical pain- who would have know at a young age.

Anyway, that was after a break up that I thought I would never get over. Well, I have been married 17 years now and hardly remember that relationship from years ago Life is funny, we make it through things all the time, things we think we could never get past.

So be sad for a while, mourn what you see as a loss. Take a couple weeks. But if you do not start to feel better after that, I suggest therapy. It can be such a great thing! You may only need a couple visits, but it gives you someone to express your feeling to. It also can show you how to change your thought pattern on it. Sometimes we get stuck on one thought and do not realize that thought is not really correct, or not the only way to think on something. It can also help you get through dealing with how to move on and date again. It does wonders to have that one on one with a real live human lol.

Hope that helps. Just know we have ALL been there!!! Now you have to learn healthy coping skills. A healthy way to process and get past this.

I promise, one day you won't even remember much about this time in your life. It will be a blurr.

 

[prettypixie]

Try not to worry, I know it's hard! First loves are difficult to get over...I am still affected sometimes by my first true love lossed and it's been several years. The point is life moves on and things do get better. Focus on yourself and discover new things that make you happy. Before you know if there will be a new person that will come along who will make happy again... "Someday your princess will come"

 

[SGB13]

 

[elemusing]

Heartache stinks. Hugs and pixie dust!

 

[klam_chowder]

Heartbreak is hard but time does heal all wounds. Take time for yourself now - do the things you lost time to do when you were in a relationship: learn a different language, get to know your faith better, discover a new skill...pamper yourself just taking it a day at a time.

And the Dis is always a good place to vent if you need to. My best to you!

cheers,

 

[rockundergirl]

I know how hard it is to go through a really bad breakup, I have been thr! When i feel really down I actually like to think about times I have been sad/depressed in the past.. the very fact that i have the memory of feeling bad, and then feeling better means that my current sadness will pass. This wont be forever trust me.. plus being single can be fun

 

[Tissa]

That stinks, I'm sorry you are going through this. I broke up with the love of my life and I thought my world was over, he was the best and I couldn't do any better, I'd be alone forever etc.. Well several years later I realized I am so much better off without him. Life goes on and you will love again.

 

[Robbya]

thank you everyone i know now that there is truly a very caring group of individuals out there. Thank God for the Dis!!!

 

[yitbos96bb]

Hey guys
I was just hoping to get some pixie dust my way....a day ago i had to break up with my girlfriend and it has really been hard. She was my first true girlfriend and i am in a state of feeling as if im back to square one and no one will ever want to go out with me again...i know this is probably dumb...but well...i suppose i have a very tough time actually coming up to girls to say hi since i just dont know how to do it....wow this is a lot of typing and it probably makes no sense but thanks for listening

Its happened to all of us. It hurts, but everyday it hurts less.

Don't worry, you are young. There will be plenty of other girls out there. As for being scared to say Hi... Well that comes with confidence. As you do it more or grow older, you will feel better about doing it. I know the fear of rejection sucks... but always remember, its never as big a deal as you think it is. I know when I was younger, I was scared that everyone would know and it would be the end of the world and I'd be humiliated. As I got older, I realized a very important thing... people don't care. They really don't. If she rejects you or says no, no big deal... talk to another girl. Just go up and say Hi... keep saying hi until you find one who says Hi back and is worth talking too. I recommend doing it as much as possible... you will feel more confident.

The secret to talking to women is simple... confidence. That's it. You don't have to be the smartest, funniest, richest or best looking. But becoming and portray confidence is the best "secret" to getting first dates, etc.


Good luck!

 

[DISNEYNV]

I agree with all the above posters! OP...hang in there I know it's hard and it is for everyone going through a breakup or divorce when you really did care about the person and it just didnt work out for whatever reason.

Dont blame yourself, just give it time, and move on. Everything happens for a reason and you will meet someone great one day...trust me.

The trick is to get to know someone who has similar interests as you do...same wants...life expectations, etc. Perhaps you could take a class or join a gym to meet new friends and to keep your mind off the breakup in the mean time...you never know where your soul mate may be "hiding".