IEP experts, help needed

[kirstenb1]

I have our 4 yr old's IEP meeting in 2 days. She attends special ed preschool 5 days a week. She has high functioning ASD.

Lately, she's been very contrary. To me it's normal sometimes if you say, "bath time" and your kid says, "I don't want to, or 5 more minutes". That is to be expected.

Zoe is a whole different level of contrary. For instance, in the morning, I go into her room, and say "Hiya gorgeous". She looks at me and sort of groans, "I'm not gorgeous". Or you say the sky sure is pretty today. She'll say, "no it is NOT". What the heck?!!

She also has several short-lived tantrums a day. Her teacher says she often gets overwhelmed by her emotions.

Would it make sense for one of her IEP goals to be,

"In 80% of interactions with peers and teachers, Zoe will use socially acceptable language and gestures". I'm sure there's a better way to say this. But we've got to get this contrary attitude under control. Who wants to be friends with the Grouchy Ladybug?!!!

Our older dd was never like this. She'd protest normal kid things, like having to go home, bathtime, new foods, etc.

 

[bookwormde]

The contrary attitude comes from very real causes and that is what you need to get under control. Unfortunatly with our kids social platitudes do nto have the saem impact as with NT kids.

For the IEP first you need to have an effective structured socia skills program. Setting goals befoer you know what skills she has deficits in and what she needs to learn those skills is backwards (although many schools like to do this since it checks th box) The first palce to start with any IEP is with a good honest fuctiinal statement . Everything else for our dids works of of that.

It is also important nto to loose track of the sensory and EF issues that intertwine with the social skill deficits.

bookwormde

 

[kirstenb1]

Thanks Bookwormde. One of the accommodations for next year on the draft IEP is a sensory diet. I have a few books on sensory processing that I'm working my way through. Maybe she's just hitting the terrible 2's rather late?

 

[bookwormde]

In a sense I guess that is true for all our kids when the social and EF demands and sensory overload.

bookwormde

 

[deerhart]

also you need to understand what is meant by socially acceptable language and gestures. Her responses to you ARE socially acceptable language. The problem being is that she's AUTOMATICALLY disagreeing with you no matter what you say. This can stem from control issues and is a common way that some kids take back control over things from parents (btdt with both my kids).

Our behavior therapist just had us switch our language to more compromising, softer language, and offering choices. Amazing difference in my son and about a 90% decree in butting heads with him.

When my son had the 75% socially acceptable language and responses in his IEP, it was geared more towards actually responding to what was being said (for example they may talk about fairy TALES and he would discuss puppy TAILS or they would talk about MAKING a fire from WOOD and he would start talking about different types of TREES). It was also geared to work with him controlling emotional responses when he got upset (crying, screaming, tantrums and of course the first skill gone was language)

Sensory diets are also good for kids with hyperactivity and anxiety. It was a KEY piece to my son's IEP for years to deal with these two areas that really flared and made a mess out of what otherwise were fairly easy things to work with.