I wish teenagers knew they're not invincible....

[Fishbone†]

I grew up right here where I live (or within a few hundred feet) and our next door neighbors have lived here longer. All of us kids grew up together, and I babysat every one of the grandchildren except the last one. Last night one of those kids (grandkids) was killed in a car accident. He was going to turn 16 today. It just doesn't seem right..... there were five kids in the car, a teenage driver, and they rolled over on a curve..... sadly enough, they rolled over because they hit a road approach that could have easily been avoided if the driver had known how to react. They left the road long before the road approach and rather than to turn into the ditch/field, she tried to recover. Now instead of celebrating a birthday, they are planning a funeral. That is so painful.

Last night as I watched people come and go from the house, I thought, OMG that could be my niece.... she's 13 and she will be getting into cars with friends soon......young "invincible" drivers without experience. I know adults make mistakes, and drive just as menacingly, but living in a county with the highest teenage death rate in the state, I've lost way too many classmates, friends, and aquaintances.

How do you parents of teens make it through these years without dying of stress. I might be one of those "mean" moms someday who think real long and hard about saying yes when they want to get into a car with a teenage driver.

You'll be missed Matt.

 

[Serena]

I've got one of those invinsible teenagers. Luckily she doesn't have her license yet.
I thought I was too at that time. I learned the hard way.

I am missing things today.


I am so sorry about Matt.

 

[helenabear]

That is so sad... I lost a friend to an invisible teen driver as well... he was in a "vegetable state" for 4 years before he died. I am so sorry for the loss of Matt

 

[debster812]

Oh Heidi.

So sad for them and for you. I lost a dear friend to another teen driver in high school (oh so many years ago ) and stories like this always just rip my heart out.

{{{hugs}}} to you, and pass one on to the grandparents (your neighbors) they'll be needing lots of them in the days to come.

I'm here if you need me.

 

[SuiteDisney]

I've worried about my son driving since the day he was born. Fortunately, he has no desire to drive even though he's 16. He's a bit intimidated by it.

I'm so sorry to hear about Matt and my heart goes out to his family.

 

[Pooh93]

Thinking of my kids driving petrifies me. I am so sorry for that family.

 

[Goofyposter]

Heidi...I'm sooo sorry about Matt....I too...as a teen...lost several of my 'friends' to "non smart" driving...You're a great person to even think about him/this.........I'm sorry that you'd had this loss in your life.

 

[ead79]

How horrible. My heart breaks for Matt's family and friends. {{{HUGS}}} for you all. All Matt's family and friends are in my prayers.

 

[#1 Disney Fan]

 

[nativetxn]

This is so sad

 

[Jingle]

I feel so bad for all the families involved when things like this happen. I know I worry all the time about my kids driving. My DS has had his license for a year now. Fortunately, no accidents. My DD should be getting her license in December.

I have taken both of them for a lot of practice driving. I am constantly talking to them about the dangers and responsibility of driving. I will also peek out the window when they leave just to make sure they all have their seat belts on. I also show them every newspaper article I find about car accidents, especially teens or those where people are not wearing seatbelts.

MY SO's brother has been paralized from the waist down since he was 20. This was from a car accident. We also have some good friends who's son was killed in a car accident last summer, right before he turned 18. All I can do is make sure my kids are very well aware of these situations.

That still may not be enough! So, I also pray that they are kept safe and do an awful lot of worrying.

 

[TimeforMe]

I have been thinking about this very subject a lot lately since one of our high school students in the school district for which I work got killed last week in a car accident. She was only 16 and had been driving home on a Sunday morning after being at a sleepover the night before. She fell asleep at the wheel and lost control of her car. This precipitated a very heartfelt talk between DD (14 1/2) and myself. I am so worried and stressed about her driving because she is a little "preoccupied" with other things (like the way she looks) a lot and all it takes is one little mistake. I have already decided I will discourage her for as long as I can in getting her driver's license and she will not be allowed to have passengers until she's had her license for one year and has gained some experience. I, too, will be one of those "mean" moms, but it will be worth it to me.

I'm so sorry to hear about this tragedy and my heart goes out to his family.

 

[LindaR]

I, too, have a teenage daughter that will soon learn to drive. For over a year now, I have been talking to her about driving. I have also set some very strict rules (which I believe are already law here) and we talk about them regularly. I have always been a very strict mom in every aspect so she knows that "driving" will have the same tough rules.

No driving after dark unless I'm in the car.

No passengers (teenage) until I give my approval (depends on how confident I am with her skills) until age 17 or 18.

She may not RIDE with another teenage driver.

Violations, even one, will result in permit/license being confiscated by me.

 

[cinlee3]

My heart goes out to this family. A very dear friend of ours lost her only son when he was barely 16. That was 15 years ago and she is still suffering.

My 17 yr old son has learned some hard lessons about teens driving in the past few weeks. He has a friend who was in an accident and his girlfriend was killed. The friend was seriously injured and will be in a wheelchair for at least 6 months. My son had just seen this girl two days before. So sad that she would be gone two days later - it really shook him up.

A few days later he was on his way home with some friends and came upon an accident that had just occured. He saw a young girl who was obviously deceased. He could not sleep that night.

He is a very good driver, but now has seen how lives can be changed in an instant.

 

[Tiggeroo]

I have twin 15yo sons who I worry about constantly. Right now it is the sports they are in, football, surfing(especially), cross country.
But driving scares me to death. One of my sons has a coach who thinks nothing of the older kids driving younger kids to practice. After reading this I became an even bigger jerk about this. You may not ride with anybody under 21 unless I know about it, know the person very well, have given approval well ahead of time, and know you are the only two in the car, and also that it is not dark.
I have an 18yo dd who has recently begun driving alone in earnest. She lives at home while attending college. I worry every single day. Believe it or not, I have just gone back to work more hours. The reason is that when I am home and she goes to school, I worry, worry, worry.
My kids have never lost anybody close to them, or even that they really know in an accident but I have. What really worries me is that one of my sons is an extremely I'm invincible, teen. He constantly tells me I worry too much and would like to put him in bubble wrap. Duh!! I tell him if he doesn't start demonstrating some common sense and a more self-preservation instinct I will never help him get a car on the road.

 

[Tiggeroo]

I just found out that the running practice my son is going to Sunday will have again the seniors driving. It is very far, and he is begging me not to drive him. He believes he will be the only kid to have his mom drive.

 

[Fishbone†]

Tiggeroo - Stick to your guns. It's just not worth it.

As a side note, I did find out that these kids (all of whom were sophomores) were "goofing around" (possibly some form of racing or drag racing) with another car full of teenagers. They did not hit...... the girl driving the car Matt was in took a corner too fast, and over corrected. What a terrible waste of a beautiful, happy, full of life and mischief kid. And a mistake Rebecca will have to live with consequences of for the rest of her life.