I was yelled at after Finding Nemo - was I wrong?

[Mama Who]

I'd have left and asked for an FP to return later when she felt better. As a sometimes noisy asthmatic myself it is *embarassing* to be the person everyone is staring at. It might be more comfortable for the child to not be in that situation. I know as her parent you feel like everyone should just be understanding but they won't be and it is awkward to know everyone is looking at you while you wheeze.

That said, the lady had no business raising the issue in front of your kid.

 

[cam&phoebsmom]

I am sorry your DD has asthma. My best friend's daughter also suffers from it and I know she is very aware of when an attack may be coming on.

That said, I think you should have taken her out when you saw she was under distress and the inhaler was not working. What may sound to you like a slight noise/coughing issue can be very noticeable to others who are not used to it.

My DD was not quite 2 the 1st time we went to WDW and got freaked out when we went to It's Tough to be a Bug (we had forgotten that it gets intense in there). After that anytime the lights went off she would grab us and cry. We hopped up and removed her immediately rather than waiting to see if she would get better. Most likely she would have stopped or just whimpered, but she is our DD and we have to be responsible if she was going to ruin somebody else's experience.

People that were jumping on the bandagon and yelling at you were not behaving kindly and I would not want to see anybody cry at AK. However I do not think the original folks saying something to you were totally in the wrong and had you taken your DD out when you realized the inhlaer was not effective you would have avoided irritating anybody around you.

I hope your DD (and you) had a better rest of the day.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I am so sorry for you and your daughter. I think it is so sad that if they had all that to say that not one of them could see if your poor daughter needed any help. Shame on them. And what kinda people yell at a mother in front of her child. Im mad for you, but here is a hug. Take care of your daughter and you and let mean people keep talking it show there true colors. Hope you had a great trip anyways.

I agree.

 

[mjohnson96]

We have been there as well

If I know DD might have a problem during a show then I usually will sit in the back as well. But if and when she does start and it gets bad enough that I feel others are being bothered by it I will remove myself from the show.

I don't feel the people that decided to take it upon themselves to make a scene regarding the situation should have done so. If it was bothering them that bad then they should have asked to see the next show or told a CM to try to assist you if it was that bad.

I hate when other people tend to feel they were or are better parents than you are. Only you know your child and unless you were doing something extremely harmful they should have butt out.

 

[GinnyEmma]

I would have left. You don't disrupt a live show for others. Sorry. I guess that I wouldn't have chosen the play if I was concerned there'd be problems. I'd have headed to firstaid.

People want to be able to hear and enjoy programs. I don't think anyone should have been rude about it, but really it was rude of you to stay in the program.

 

[imthatgirl]

While I do think the woman shouldn't have "yelled"(though I do wonder if she actually yelled or just said something)....I absolutely do think you should have removed your daughter from the performance.

IDK...it just seems like common courtesy.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

She sat on my lap and coughed/wheezed throughout the show. She wasn't loud, but it was noticeable.

For some reason, I misread this part. I had it in my head that she was breathing loudly and wheezing and maybe coughing here and there. Not constantly coughing throughout the show. If she was indeed coughing through the show, you should have removed her. Still no reason for a crowd of people to attack you, though.

 

[livndisney]

For some reason, I misread this part. I had it in my head that she was breathing loudly and wheezing and maybe coughing here and there. Not constantly coughing throughout the show. If she was indeed coughing through the show, you should have removed her. Still no reason for a crowd of people to attack you, though.

I must have missed the "crowd of people" attacking. I read one older lady and her husband.

To the op if my child is disrupting others, we leave.

 

[DisGirl819]

I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. I hate when bystanders think they can parent your kids. I have asthma so I know what you and your daughter are dealing with. I would have told them to mind their own business and that I don't need their advice...and my husband would have given them a piece of his mind too. I'm sure you were doing everything you know to do for her and weren't being irresponsible at all.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

I must have missed the "crowd of people" attacking. I read one older lady and her husband.

After the show was over an older lady turned around and said, "I hate to say this, but you should have removed her from the show so she wasn't disrupting everyone."

Her husband then jumped in to tell me I should get her medical attention and if she can't stop coughing I should be calling 911 not sitting through a show.

It got so bad I started to cry and everyone around us was jumping in the conversation. Not only couldn't I make my daughter feel better, but I was getting yelled at by strangers.

That would royally stink.

 

[kandb]

I am a firm believer that if a child is being disruptive (crying fit, temper tantrum, vomiting, continual coughing etc.) that they should be removed from the situation, be it a restaurant, show, movie etc. I have 3 children and if anyone of them is being disruptive, my husband or I remove them. Period. I don't think it's right to ruin other peoples enjoyment.

 

[Tiger926]

I don't think that you're a bad mother. And the older woman was rude if she yelled at you. I cannot imagine a whole crowd also thinking that it was their business to chime in as well. Don't people have anything better to do while they're on vacation?

BUT (and this is a BIG "but") you were wrong to subject others to the distraction of your child's coughing and wheezing during the performance. And it's also wrong to think that someone else should get up and move from their seat because you are doing something that is disturbing them.

The appropriate thing for you to have done would have been to leave the theater with your daughter so that you could attend to her without ruining the experience for those around you.

Not much that you can do about it now. But something to keep in mind for the future. I hope your daughter feels better and you can enjoy the rest of your vacation.

ITA! Not appropriate for them to be ganging up on the OP at all.

That being said, we also have asthma here too, and we would have left the theatre for sure, and have done so in several instances. We have removed our children for varying reasons, so as not to bother people, and several of those times cost us money, tickets, etc., but it was the right and necessary thing to do.

Tiger

 

[daisyduck123]

I would not have let my daughter's coughing interrupt the enjoyment of others. I would've taken her out.

 

[livndisney]

That would royally stink.

Learn something new everyday. Never knew people "joining in the conversation" could be read as "attacking".


To the op when you were attacked, did you call for a CM or security? What was the resolution?


I hope your dd began to feel better and you were able to enjoy the rest of your day.

 

[mom to minnie&mickey]

Sorry OP, while I realize your mind was on your dd and trying to get her better, you did the easy thing rather than the right one. It was easier for you to stay put rather than get up and go to another cool location like baby center or first aid. You chose to stay where people were enjoying the show even though I am pretty sure you knew that your situation was bothering the people sitting close to you. I saw that show last year and if I remember correctly it is pretty long. My family too would have been pretty irritated by your lack of consideration and I am not surprised you got an earful (not saying that was OK) if those people had to sit through 30 minutes or so of coughing. It was not for them to get up and change seats or come back to see another showing of NEMO. Still, I hope you had a magical trip.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

Learn something new everyday. Never knew people "joining in the conversation" could be read as "attacking".

She said she started to cry and was being "yelled at by strangers". Hoping maybe some of those "joining in the conversation" were at least supporting her and not all yelling.

 

[Hannathy]

I would not have let my daughter's coughing interrupt the enjoyment of others. I would've taken her out.

Agree!

A live show was not first aid or the baby center. You should not have disrupted the other peoples show with your DD. It wasn't the appropriate place to have her. It was very rude.

 

[okeydokey]

If my child was disrupting the show for others, I would have left. I have no right to be noisy in a show even if we can't help it. Sucks, but it's true.

 

[Disneybound!!]

So I ask the Disers - what would you have done?

I'm so sorry that happened to you! I'm sure you are a wonderful mother, and it sounds like you were doing the best thing for her at the moment. Some people just lack compassion and self control, and I'm sorry that those people were so thoughtless. We all get irritated sometimes by things others do (sometimes rightly so and sometimes not), but usually if we stop thinking about ourselves, we realize that it just isn't worth hurting someone over. They should have kept their thoughts to themselves. I hope your daughter is feeling better now.

 

[Hannathy]

I'm so sorry that happened to you! I'm sure you are a wonderful mother, and it sounds like you were doing the best thing for her at the moment. Some people just lack compassion and self control, and I'm sorry that those people were so thoughtless. We all get irritated sometimes by things others do (sometimes rightly so and sometimes not), but usually if we stop thinking about ourselves, we realize that it just isn't worth hurting someone over. They should have kept their thoughts to themselves. I hope your daughter is feeling better now.

Why should they be held to a higher standard that the OP?

There show was ruined and they were upset and angry I know I would have been, except I would have asked her to leave before it was over.

If she can't be expected to act with consideration why should they?