I want to get a dog but....

[mariolatry]

....I can't seem to find one.

Here is our background: I am a SAHM. I have two kids, ages 3 and 5. My timeline to adopt would be in about 12-24 months, which would make them 4ish and 6ish years old. I want to have a solid 12-18 months to train and bond with a dog. We live in a home with a huge yard, invisible fence but no regular fence. I will be staying home full-time for another 3 years, then I will work probably 2 days per week. I did not grow up with dogs, but my husband did. I recognize the significance of owning a pet, which is why I'm really taking my time and doing proper investigation.

-There are two animal shelters within 20 miles of my home. I volunteer at one of them and literally all they have are adult pit bulls and bull mastiffs. The paid staff tell me which ones were surrendered for aggression or behavior problems (most of them). Their policy is not to adopt these dogs out to families with kids under twelve. The second shelter is under investigation for knowingly adopting out sick dogs, including a dog that went to an acquaintance of mine. I would be very nervous about adopting for them

-I tried 5 different rescue organizations. I got turned down for having children under the age of 10/not having a fence of at least six feet high/not being able to guarantee that I would stay home full-time for at least 3-5 years/not having enough "dog experience".

-I've had a few breeds in mind, so I thought I would visit a few breeders to check out the dogs in real life to see what I thought of them. I cannot even get the breeders to return phone calls or emails, except for one who told me the whole visit would be a waste of time because she would not even consider adopting to me until my kids were at least 8/I had a fenced-in yard/someone was home full time. She also said I should be able to provide 3 letters of reference and 6 months of bank statements so that I could prove I had the resources to provide for an animal.

-I would not consider craigslist.com due to seriously bad experiences I had there.

-Petfinder makes me nervous because I had a friend who ended up getting a Great Dane with parvo dumped on her knowingly by the previous owner.


I understand that young children should not be left alone with dogs. I am home full-time and fully willing and able to provide constant supervision. My husband has vetoed another biological child and I want to adopt a furry child to love, as my children are beginning the natural separation process of becoming school kids. How do you get "dog experience" if no one will give you a dog? Isn't it easier to count on someone being home full-time if the kids are a little younger? I wouldn't want to adopt a dog while I was working and unable to give it the training and attention it needs.

If I knew someone who had a great dog that they had to adopt out for situational issues (moving or divorce) and they could vouch for that dog, I would love to do that.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

 

[npmommie]

what part of mass are you in?

 

[mariolatry]

Central Mass

 

[minkydog]

Bank Statements?? Maybe you should throw in your SS number and tax records, too.

I can understand why breeders/rescue groups are hesitant to adopt to you though. You have your hands full with two small children already. AGes 6 & 4 are still small children and even though I'm sure your kids are well-behaved, a lot of kids are not gentle with animals. Lots of risk for injury to the child and the dog. And no fenced in yard? I kinda see their point. My experience with the underground fence was that my dog was willing to take the "snap" to get the reward of running through the neighborhood like a nitwit and then he was afraid to come back into the yard. As far as being home full-time, though, I don't see that as being a problem so much, since you are planning to be home until the last kid goes to school in about 3 years. That should be plenty of time for a dog to adjust to the household and complete training. Certainly it's ideal if someone is home all the time, but very very few pet owners can afford to do that or even want to do that.

My suggestion is contact some veterinarians. They always have clients who are looking to rehome their animals and I doubt they will be as anal about it.

 

[mariolatry]

I can't seem to get the Dis boards to load today!

I thought of a few clarification points
-I would actually prefer an adult dog, as I know the havoc that puppies can wreak. I just feel nervous adopting a dog with an unknown history, you know?

-The local shelter did just bring in a few mix breed dogs. My "contacts" have filled me in on a few details that might disqualify most of them. I also think it's a bit early to adopt one NOW, you know?

-I would never leave a dog alone outside. If the dog is outside, it will be on a leash.

 

[npmommie]

I sent you a PM

 

[minkydog]

Personally, I'd prefer an adult dog, too. I've raised 3 from puppies and I think I'm done now. The great thing about an adult(I'm talking 5yrs or more) is that you *do* already know a lot about their personality. A good rescue group will have temperment tested the dog, will know if it's good with cats and kids, whether it's had its shots and if there is any history of aggression. An adult dog is more likely to be housebroken and have some obedience training.

Certainly, any dog you get could turn out to be bad-mannered, whether an adult or a pup. But for my money(and energy!) I would go adult all the way. Puppies are too much like babies, and I don't want another baby either.

 

[Mickey's Minion]

....I can't seem to find one.

Here is our background: I am a SAHM. I have two kids, ages 3 and 5. My timeline to adopt would be in about 12-24 months, which would make them 4ish and 6ish years old. I want to have a solid 12-18 months to train and bond with a dog. We live in a home with a huge yard, invisible fence but no regular fence. I will be staying home full-time for another 3 years, then I will work probably 2 days per week. I did not grow up with dogs, but my husband did. I recognize the significance of owning a pet, which is why I'm really taking my time and doing proper investigation.

-There are two animal shelters within 20 miles of my home. I volunteer at one of them and literally all they have are adult pit bulls and bull mastiffs. The paid staff tell me which ones were surrendered for aggression or behavior problems (most of them). Their policy is not to adopt these dogs out to families with kids under twelve. The second shelter is under investigation for knowingly adopting out sick dogs, including a dog that went to an acquaintance of mine. I would be very nervous about adopting for them

-I tried 5 different rescue organizations. I got turned down for having children under the age of 10/not having a fence of at least six feet high/not being able to guarantee that I would stay home full-time for at least 3-5 years/not having enough "dog experience".

-I've had a few breeds in mind, so I thought I would visit a few breeders to check out the dogs in real life to see what I thought of them. I cannot even get the breeders to return phone calls or emails, except for one who told me the whole visit would be a waste of time because she would not even consider adopting to me until my kids were at least 8/I had a fenced-in yard/someone was home full time. She also said I should be able to provide 3 letters of reference and 6 months of bank statements so that I could prove I had the resources to provide for an animal.

-I would not consider craigslist.com due to seriously bad experiences I had there.

-Petfinder makes me nervous because I had a friend who ended up getting a Great Dane with parvo dumped on her knowingly by the previous owner.


I understand that young children should not be left alone with dogs. I am home full-time and fully willing and able to provide constant supervision. My husband has vetoed another biological child and I want to adopt a furry child to love, as my children are beginning the natural separation process of becoming school kids. How do you get "dog experience" if no one will give you a dog? Isn't it easier to count on someone being home full-time if the kids are a little younger? I wouldn't want to adopt a dog while I was working and unable to give it the training and attention it needs.

If I knew someone who had a great dog that they had to adopt out for situational issues (moving or divorce) and they could vouch for that dog, I would love to do that.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

6 months of bank statements? That is absolutely ridiculous. And I am pretty involved with the dog show/breeder world.

I am sorry that my fellow dog people have been so unreasonable. Have faith that not every breeder is like that.

Although, the invisible fence is not a plus in your favor. Most breeders won't sell to somebody that relies on an invisible fence, not because it won't contain the dog, but because it does not keep anything out. Your dog is a sitting duck in a yard with an invisible fence because any wandering dog, child or predator can enter the yard and get at the puppy.

I would recommend becoming a member of this list:
http://showdogs-l.com/
This list has most of the top breeders in the country subscribed to it.

Explain exactly what you have explained here and ask how you can improve your chances of getting a well bred puppy from a reputable breeder?

Much like the DIS, you will get some snippy answers but you will also get lots of good advice.

If I was still breeding, I would happily sell a puppy to you. You sound like a wonderful home that is very willing to do what it takes to raise a puppy right. I know there will be plenty of other breeders that feel the same way.

And since you want an adult dog, you sound like the perfect candidate for a retired show dog that a breeder is not going to use in their breeding program.

 

[mariolatry]

I am so grateful for positive input! Thanks all.

 

[KandD]

I'm PMing you.

 

[si-am]

We don't even have kids and can't seem to adopt a dog because we don't have a fence. Yet SO many people live in townhomes and apartments without yards and they get to have dogs!

 

[crjack]

We used a great rescue group here it MA that has primarily mixed breed dogs so I will also send you a PM.

We adopted our dog just over 7 years ago and my children were around 6 & 8 at the time. Our main concern was tempermant, since like most families we have an active household.

Our dog is amazing and is probably the most popular resident in our neighborhood! They did a great job of matching up our family with a dog who loves people and doesn't get overwhelmed with people coming & going, etc.

He was very well socialized and was already netuered and housebroken. The vet estimated he was about 7 months old when we got him. This group brings a lot of dogs up from the South in areas where pet populations are high and shelter space is limited.

I never worried about size or breed, only personality. Just like the rescue group we wanted it to be a good fit and a forever home for any dog we adopted.

Best of luck and try not to get too frustrated. Not every group works the same way and once you find the right fit it will be a great addition to your family.

 

[Jynohn]

I agree that the breeder who was asking for bank statements was completely out of line. While it's extremely rude not to answer your emails or phone calls, perhaps part of the reason why you're not getting too many responses is because you say your timeframe is up to two years from now. Many breeders are innundated with inquiries, some serious, and some just looking for information for future reference. I do my best to respond to all inquiries as quickly as possible, but I'm sure there are some who are overwhelmed with responses, and put the inquiries for future litters to the side for a while. Not to excuse their actions, because if you took the time to write a well-thought out email to a breeder you deserve some sort of response, but that MAY be what's happening here.

You sound like the sort of family I'd be thrilled to place an older puppy or retired adult with. What sort of breeds were you looking at? Maybe if you let us know we can help guide you in the right direction.

 

[PlutoPony]

The lack of a visible fence will be tough to get around. They just aren't particularly well respected in the "dog world".... you'd be surprised at the number of dogs that will ignore the shock and run through them to get to whatever is on the other side. And unfortunately they're not a deterrent for animals and people coming into the yard. Any chance you could fence your yard?

You might want to visit a few dog shows in your area and walk around looking at the dogs. Many breeders love to talk about their dogs - as long as they aren't busy getting ready for the ring - and if they see your children respecting the dogs (don't run up to an unknown dog, ask the breeder if it's OK to approach their dogs, etc.) they may be more willing to consider you as a potential owner. They are often a source of good adult dogs as well as puppies.

 

[LaurenLC]

I think the breeder you worked with is a bit out of line. We purchased an uncommon breed and we weren't asked to provide months of bank statements…That’s crazy! I would suggest contacting another breeder.