I need tips on how to stop breastfeeding!

[Mouse House Mama]

It's just another way for some parents to feel more superior to others. And it's a load of bull.

It is not a load of bull. Do your research. I have had to because of allergy issues. It has nothing to do with being superior.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

It's amazing we all survived our parents ignorance when it comes to these things, isn't it?

It's funny that people have been drinking cows milk for as long as we've known how to milk cows. Why then, all in the sudden, is it so horrible?

Well I had quite a few things as an infant that research has now shown are not good things to be giving an infant. We evolve, we learn more, our environment in general changes. All of these thing effect us.Everyone didn't survive their parent's ignorance. They still don't. Although I don't think they were/are ignorant. I think that the knowledge was not there so they could not have known.

 

[crashbb]

Rice milk. We can't have any animal milks in our house. (allergies) Some people use soy milk but too much soy is not good for boys or girls. Especially the way that soy is processed to make soy milk. There are plenty of foods that are calcium enriched and/or full of calcium naturally. Orange juice is one of them. Leafy greens also.
Bumber is actually right in that it takes your body more energy to process the proteins in milk than you will actually absorb in terms of calcium.

What does using energy have to do with absorbing calcium? Absorbing calcium is not supposed to give you energy, so the fact that it takes energy to process the proteins is a complete non sequitur.

I do agree that other sources of calcium are readily available for those who choose to/cannot drink milk or eat dairy.

 

[Liltx]

I give my girls half a viactive each day. It tastes like a tootsie roll. Our pedi OK'ed it. Be sure to ask yours first. They both eat cheese and yogurt but I don't allow them to eat enough that they get enough calcium from it. Be careful with yogurt as most of it is VERY high in sugar. If he doesn't like milk then he for sure won't like natural yogurt. They both drink a cup of milk at school.

Monica

 

[Mouse House Mama]

What does using energy have to do with absorbing calcium? Absorbing calcium is not supposed to give you energy, so the fact that it takes energy to process the proteins is a complete non sequitur.

I do agree that other sources of calcium are readily available for those who choose to/cannot drink milk or eat dairy.

I think you are miscontruing the term energy. When your body processes all the proteins in milk it deletes almost all of the calcium because of the way your body breaks down the milk. Meaning is uses so much energy to break down the milk that is depletes the calcium from what you took in. Does that make more sense?

 

[princessmom29]

I know I am stepping into it here, but have you considered the psychological impact of prolonged nursing?? I just don't think I would be comfortable with my child being able to remember being nursed by me. I have 2 friends who nursed until age 3. Admittedly i am only talking about 2 situations here, but their kids are very clingy, needy and insecure without mommy. I think that the attachmnt to the breast for so long has something to do with it along with the fact that in their cases mommy needed baby to nurse more than baby needed it. One of them just wanted to keep her baby as long as possible and the other is very insecure herself and needed to be validated. Not saying that is the case in evey situation, but the impact that it has on the child is something to consider. If I wasin your case I would be stopping sooner reather than later. it is like passies, bottles,sippies, blankies and other security items. If you stop it before the child is old enough to develop a psychological attachment to it the trama is not an issue. My DD was off the bottle and passie by 10 months and sippies by 2. I didn't want to take them away, but it was what was best for her so I had to deal with it.

 

[princessmom29]

I think you are miscontruing the term energy. When your body processes all the proteins in milk it deletes almost all of the calcium because of the way your body breaks down the milk. Meaning is uses so much energy to break down the milk that is depletes the calcium from what you took in. Does that make more sense?

I am A biochemist and i can tell you that this is NOT true!!! You cannot just "delete" calcium. It doesn't work that way. While not all of the calcium in milk is processed by the body you DO NOT deplete calcium to break down protien. That is just BAD science. I don't know what your source is for this info, but I do not think I would take any more advice from them. Calcium has nothing to do with energy use by the body. That involves two molecules called ATP and NADPH. Neither of these contain or use calcium. They are tellin you what they want you to believe and not giving you the facts!

 

[mjmoon]

I know I am stepping into it here, but have you considered the psychological impact of prolonged nursing?? I just don't think I would be comfortable with my child being able to remember being nursed by me. I have 2 friends who nursed until age 3. Admittedly i am only talking about 2 situations here, but their kids are very clingy, needy and insecure without mommy. I think that the attachmnt to the breast for so long has something to do with it along with the fact that in their cases mommy needed baby to nurse more than baby needed it. One of them just wanted to keep her baby as long as possible and the other is very insecure herself and needed to be validated. Not saying that is the case in evey situation, but the impact that it has on the child is something to consider. If I wasin your case I would be stopping sooner reather than later. it is like passies, bottles,sippies, blankies and other security items. If you stop it before the child is old enough to develop a psychological attachment to it the trama is not an issue. My DD was off the bottle and passie by 10 months and sippies by 2. I didn't want to take them away, but it was what was best for her so I had to deal with it.

I donno- while I didn't breastfeed (pumped for each child though) I don't see the harm in allowing children to have comfort items. I'm a firm believer in allowing them to give up things in their own time (within reason). My son gave up his paci at 18 months, bottle at 2 (yes, horrible parent I am letting him keep his bottle until 2) and still sleeps with his favorite blue knit blankie! What is so wrong with that? I don't know of any child permanently scarred because they sucked on a paci until they were 3, or have a special blankie or teddy to sleep with. There are lots of opportunities for our kids to grow into secure young adults.. pulling their comfort items at 10 months old is unnecessary, IMO. (and with all due respect)

 

[crashbb]

I think you are miscontruing the term energy. When your body processes all the proteins in milk it deletes almost all of the calcium because of the way your body breaks down the milk. Meaning is uses so much energy to break down the milk that is depletes the calcium from what you took in. Does that make more sense?

No - YOU are misconstruing the term energy. But, even if you weren't, your explanation still wouldn't account for the "fact" stated earlier that drinking milk takes calcium out of your bones. Your body may, according to you, take some of the calcium in milk as "energy", but it still wouldn't take calcium out of your bones.

Anyway, this argument is not germane to the discussion, so it should probably end.

 

[princessmom29]

I donno- while I didn't breastfeed (pumped for each child though) I don't see the harm in allowing children to have comfort items. I'm a firm believer in allowing them to give up things in their own time (within reason). My son gave up his paci at 18 months, bottle at 2 (yes, horrible parent I am letting him keep his bottle until 2) and still sleeps with his favorite blue knit blankie! What is so wrong with that? I don't know of any child permanently scarred because they sucked on a paci until they were 3, or have a special blankie or teddy to sleep with. There are lots of opportunities for our kids to grow into secure young adults.. pulling their comfort items at 10 months old is unnecessary, IMO.

pulling the bottle and paci before age 1 is very important form a dental health standpoint. It can cause tooth decay as well as an overbite. I am simply saying that IF it is a problem FOR YOU sooner is better than later. I took the paci and bottle because it was medicall necessary not only for dental health, but because the were contributing to my child's ear infections. I would have waited until age one had my doctor not advised me to do it sooner. She is 5 and still sleeps with stuffed animals, but they do not create an attachment issue. She can sleep fine without them, and never wants to take them out of the bed and carry them around ect. I have no problem with comfort items unless they become an issue in that you cannot ask the child to leave it at home without major drama.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I am A biochemist and i can tell you that this is NOT true!!! You cannot just "delete" calcium. It doesn't work that way. While not all of the calcium in milk is processed by the body you DO NOT deplete calcium to break down protien. That is just BAD science. I don't know what your source is for this info, but I do not think I would take any more advice from them. Calcium has nothing to do with energy use by the body. That involves two molecules called ATP and NADPH. Neither of these contain or use calcium. They are tellin you what they want you to believe and not giving you the facts!

I know that I am not describing it right but our doctor who happens to be very respected in the biomedical field has explained it to us. The bottom line is that you do not absorb that much calcium from milk. If you want to argue why and how it happens then have fun.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

No - YOU are misconstruing the term energy. But, even if you weren't, your explanation still wouldn't account for the "fact" stated earlier that drinking milk takes calcium out of your bones. Your body may, according to you, take some of the calcium in milk as "energy", but it still wouldn't take calcium out of your bones.

Anyway, this argument is not germane to the discussion, so it should probably end.

I never said that milk takes calcium out of your bones. That is ridiculous! I guess I am misusing the word energy so it is not clear. My point is that you don't really absorb much calcium from milk itself. Better?

 

[crashbb]

I never said that milk takes calcium out of your bones. That is ridiculous! I guess I am misusing the word energy so it is not clear. My point is that you don't really absorb much calcium from milk itself. Better?

You said that Bumbershoot wasn't wrong and since she said that milk takes calcium from your bones, I thought that it was a reasonable assumption that you thought so as well.

I have stated a few times that calcium absorption from milk isn't 100%. Your explanation with energy is totally confusing to me, but I think we actually agree to some extent - though we may differ on the extent to which calcium absorption from milk is reduced.

 

[aanderson5]

I know I am stepping into it here, but have you considered the psychological impact of prolonged nursing?? I just don't think I would be comfortable with my child being able to remember being nursed by me. I have 2 friends who nursed until age 3. Admittedly i am only talking about 2 situations here, but their kids are very clingy, needy and insecure without mommy. I think that the attachmnt to the breast for so long has something to do with it along with the fact that in their cases mommy needed baby to nurse more than baby needed it. One of them just wanted to keep her baby as long as possible and the other is very insecure herself and needed to be validated. Not saying that is the case in evey situation, but the impact that it has on the child is something to consider. If I wasin your case I would be stopping sooner reather than later. it is like passies, bottles,sippies, blankies and other security items. If you stop it before the child is old enough to develop a psychological attachment to it the trama is not an issue. My DD was off the bottle and passie by 10 months and sippies by 2. I didn't want to take them away, but it was what was best for her so I had to deal with it.

I breast fed DS till 29 months and he is is one of the most secure, independent, outgoing kids I know (really, I'm not biased ). I know people who didn't breast feed or weaned early and their kids are extreemly clingy. Kids have different personalities and a needy child is not made to be needy because they are allowed comfort objects, whether it be a paci, a stuffed animal or mommies milk.

I know you are making your statement based on your friends experiances but from your description it sounds like there are other issues going on in those cases than just extended breast feeding. I think you will find, if you are interested in reasearching, that extended breastfeeding is believed to make children more secure and has a positive psychological impact.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

You said that Bumbershoot wasn't wrong and since she said that milk takes calcium from your bones, I thought that it was a reasonable assumption that you thought so as well.

I have stated a few times that calcium absorption from milk isn't 100%. Your explanation with energy is totally confusing to me, but I think we actually agree to some extent - though we may differ on the extent to which calcium absorption from milk is reduced.

I think we do agree but it is getting lost in how we are saying it.
I apologize because I didn't really pay attention to Bumbershoots whole post so that is my fault.

 

[Missin'Disney]

I breast fed DS till 29 months and he is is one of the most secure, independent, outgoing kids I know (really, I'm not biased ). I know people who didn't breast feed or weaned early and their kids are extreemly clingy. Kids have different personalities and a needy child is not made to be needy because they are allowed comfort objects, whether it be a paci, a stuffed animal or mommies milk.

I know you are making your statement based on your friends experiances but from your description it sounds like there are other issues going on in those cases than just extended breast feeding. I think you will find, if you are interested in reasearching, that extended breastfeeding is believed to make children more secure and has a positive psychological impact.

A lot of research does in fact corroborate what you are pointing out....that children who are given the freedom to nurse until they are ready to wean develop more secure attachments to their caregiver and are thought to be generally better-adjusted.

I would personally rather be my kids "comfort object" than some piece of silicone any day.

And to the poster who suggested "disciplining" a toddler who is acting out of frustration (throwing boppy) at not being allowed to nurse: this evidences some serious insensitivity to children, IMO.

OP: there may be some natural distress if your child is not the one leading the weaning process & I hope that you are sensitive to it if that is the case. Good luck to you....I will be right there with you next month when I leave for Disney for a training seminar for 6 days and my little 21-month nurseling is left behind with Daddy. I'm so upset about it, but it will be time. I wish us both luck, we'll need it.

 

[toesmom]

I have to admit, threads like this can be very frustrating as a mom to kids who loved to breast feed. I would never try to encourage anyone to breastfeed, although it was my choice. I do agree that it's really really tough to help a toddler wean once they learn to love breastfeeding. And anyone who has nursed past 1 year might understand the attachment toddlers can have to the breast. I would equate it to the attachment that child has to her favourite teddy bear or favourite blanket that they need to sleep with or take everywhere. Taking it away is difficult, basically a complete change in behaviour for the child.


Every parent thinks they are making the best choice for their kids, whatever that might be.

I won't openly acknowledge how long my kids nursed for because it seems people love to comment, but around the world, it is not uncommon for kids to self-wean by the age of 6.


Now, back to the OP's question to stop nursing: best tip would be probably to send little one with grandparents for a night or two (or anything to change the routine for a few nights), and follow up with a change in routine between you and the little one.

Such as, when he reaches for the breast, cover it up, and distract with something else. If you keep doing it, eventually I think he'll figure it out. And let dad do night time. Hope that helps.

 

[mom2taylorandemily]

When DD was 2, I was wanting BF'ng to be over. I needed my breasts back, or rather I needed her to not be so attached to me. I think the day I decided was the day we were grocery shopping and as I was busy getting coupons out, she tried to lift my shirt up and was loudly saying num num mommy! and right as a family with teen boys walking by. I was so embarrassed, that she could just lift my shirt and out and out ask so verbally for it. I knew that day, it was time. So, when we went in for her next well child check up, I mentioned it to Pediatrician so, after he was done with her exam, he told her that he was taking mommy's milk so the new baby coming in later could have it. She said ok, then later that night she asked for it and I reminded her of what Dr. had said and she said ok and took her sippy cup of water to bed with her instead. She never asked again. It was that easy. If I hadn't have lived it I'd have never believed it.

 

[snoopy5386]

I'm going to have to go with cow's milk being bad for kids as BS.

Not only could my mom not produce milk, but she couldn't afford formula. My brother and I were both raised on Cow's milk. Him from about 3 weeks on and me from birth. The only difference is that we both started on very runny fortified infant cereal early so that we were getting more calories.

As for weaning, soy milk is sweeter, or if they are over 1 year old a little local honey will sweeten the milk and make it more appealing. But I think if it's mainly a comfort thing then finding a alternative like cuddling or being allowed a special item to comfort is appropriate. But do whatever is comfortable for the two of you.

My kid drinks cow's milk, but I don't think it being bad for you is all BS. Plenty of cultures around the globe do not drink cow or any other milks. If you do some research, you'll find that the worldwide weaning age is somewhere between 4 and 7. I believe that if we as a culture nursed our children for that long then, no then wouldn't need cow's milk in the quantity that we as a culture consume it. I do believe human milk is made for human babies and children and cow's milk is made for baby cows but will do as a substitute for human milk. My DD drinks between 1 and 2 cups of cow's milk a day. I give it to her because it is a quick and easy source of calcium, but more importantly for us protein. I have a really hard time getting protein rich foods into her and milk fits the bill.

 

[mandynee22]

It's amazing we all survived our parents ignorance when it comes to these things, isn't it?

It's funny that people have been drinking cows milk for as long as we've known how to milk cows. Why then, all in the sudden, is it so horrible?

I think it's because things WERE different back then. For one, the cow milk they drank/people drank as babies certainly didn't have all the hormones the stuff we have today has. There was even a story about organic milk companies not actually being organic (and no, I don't have a source, read about it a while ago, didn't care to save. I'm sure google would find it)
FTR- I AM a huge breastfeeding and child-led weaning advocate BUT I also drink cow's milk, as do my kids- even the still breastfeeding 2 yr old.
Also, the "cow's milk is for baby cows" thing is more about formulas being cow milk based and still said to be "as good" or "about as good" as breast milk. It's just a way to say that that's for baby cows and breast milk is for baby humans