I love WDW and DH can't stand it!!

[Ms. WDW]

And yes; we own over at the BWV. Go figure. He actually purhased for me and DS who are the WDW fanatics in the family.

But...he has never seen our "investment" and I thought a "family vacation" was in order.

So I go and make ressies for Mid July in a 1 BR Standard, pick up airline tickets and think all is well.

HA! Last week he made some type of remark about how this will be his last time going to WDW. I told him that if he really didn't want to go then don't! But he said it was ok.

Lastnight reading the NY Times, there was an article on WDW in 36 Hours and he asked me if I wanted to see it. I said not now. He then says again "I'm not going to WDW anymore" and at that point I snapped back " then do me a favor and don't go".

What should I do???? Leave it be and see what happens when I go to purchase our Park Passes prior to the trip?? Or reside myself to the fact that he's not going and it's going to be DS, me and the friends we'll meet down in Fl. later that week???

I don't want to argue over a "vacation" but I also don't want him with us if he's going to piss and moan the entire week.

Please....any suggestions???

 

[helenabear]

Linda, I so feel for you. It has been 4 years almost since my husband has joined me on a WDW trip. I am hoping for this year, but we will see. Anyway, all I do now is ask "Do you want to go?" and I let him decide. If he wants to go, fine, if not, fine. I was the instigator for DVC in my family and he agreed to it knowing it was the best thing for us in the long run.

I would just quietly keep planning as if he were coming and if he gets a little "cranky" remind him of other things he can do in the area while down there. In the future just ask him what he wants before you go, and see. You might get lucky and he may join you. He could be like my DH and just be burned out from WDW (going 2 times in about a year did it for mine). Sorry that he is being so "bad" about it, but I wouldn't dwell on it too much. Just enjoy it when you can with your DS and friends

 

[Judique]

Originally posted by Ms. WDW
And yes; we own over at the BWV. Go figure. He actually purhased for me and DS who are the WDW fanatics in the family.

But...he has never seen our "investment" and I thought a "family vacation" was in order.

So I go and make ressies for Mid July in a 1 BR Standard, pick up airline tickets and think all is well.

HA! Last week he made some type of remark about how this will be his last time going to WDW. I told him that if he really didn't want to go then don't! But he said it was ok.

Lastnight reading the NY Times, there was an article on WDW in 36 Hours and he asked me if I wanted to see it. I said not now. He then says again "I'm not going to WDW anymore" and at that point I snapped back " then do me a favor and don't go".

What should I do???? Leave it be and see what happens when I go to purchase our Park Passes prior to the trip?? Or reside myself to the fact that he's not going and it's going to be DS, me and the friends we'll meet down in Fl. later that week???

I don't want to argue over a "vacation" but I also don't want him with us if he's going to piss and moan the entire week.

Please....any suggestions???

Don't ask him to go again, or even bring it up. Start a list ...prominently attached to the refrigerator....of things that need to be done while you are gone. Next to the list of things that need to be done, start a list that shows your itinerary, where you'll be eating, movies you might see at DTD, time to be spent by the pool, things you need to bring such as that new bikini with the thong style bottom (<g>), things to pick up such as wine and beer and snack food......

 

[pmcpmc]

WE combine Disney with many other things in Florida

 

[JimC]

When vacation planning and preparations start becoming a point of contention and ******* take a time out. Maybe a discussion of family priorities is in order.

 

[SugarBear]

I don't suppose a new husband is an option?

 

[Granny]

I can't think of anything worse than taking anyone on vacation if they don't want to be there. Obviously, it wouldn't be a case of making magical family memories if one of the members had no interest in being there.

I agree helenabear and pmcpmc....there are plenty of other things to do in the Orlando area. Is it going into the parks that he dislikes?

While you're at the parks he could be playing golf. Or relaxing at the ESPN Club. Or taking a day trip to Kennedy Space Center. He would still be around in the evenings to enjoy some great restaurants both on-site and off-site.

I think JimC made a very good suggestion as well.

 

[disfountainofyouth]

What are his objections to going? Have you pointed out options for him
besides the parks: Golf, fishing, Just RELAXING.

 

[Beca]

I'm SOOO sorry!!! I cannot imagine who could not find SOMETHING to enjoy at WDW...even if it is just watching the people you love MOST having a WONDERFUL time!!! God willing, on our next trip, I will be pg (Please, God please)...and will be able to do very little...but, I wouldn't miss that trip for the WORLD!!! And really, if you have to be miserable...where else would I rather be miserable...home or WDW???

I agree with JimC...maybe he is getting too caught up in the "this is not what I want to do for a VACATION", and not caught up enough in the "I want to see that big smile on my son's face", and "spend relaxing time with my family".

Maybe if you both compromise, and allow HIM to plan certain days of your vacation. I don't know...everyone has different experiences based on the nature of their relationships. Some people LOVE separate vacations...if that is the case, tell him to plan his OWN trip to WDW, and you and DS will join him when you can. Or, maybe you can plan to meet up for ONE activity a day.

Life is SOOO busy...I think maybe he does just need to be reminded how wonderful spending stress-free time together can be...and, also how soon your DS will be too old to want to go to WDW with you (sorry to depress you...they just grow up SOO fast!!)

I'm sure you've had talks ad nauseum, but maybe if he knew this trip was a "bonding" trip, it might change his focus.

Good luck!!!

Beca

PS...you just made me very happy that I actually married "Peter Pan"!!!!

 

[vernon]

I think there are so many things in Central Florida to do that I defy anyone not to find something they enjoy. From reading your post (that he's never seen your investment) I get the feeling maybe he lacks interest and knowledge as to what's available to him. Many people think WDW is just about MM and a few lame rides, we know there's a lot more to it than that, sometimes you just need to broaden your ( and his) horizons a little to find things that will get him to appreciate what's on offer.

If you both want to vacation together then finding some common ground would be one option, or finding some things for him to do ( that he enjoys) while you're at the parks is a second.

If he doesn't want to vacation together then that's a little more tricky and may need a few chats as to why, but some people do need some private space at times and maybe he needs to go off on his own camping or something. I don't think arguing over the situation is going to help things much, maybe if you suggest a couple of things that you know he likes doing might help to nail down if its WDW or going away together is the problem.

 

[TheRustyScupper]

1) OK, I (painfully) admit to the world.
2) Not all members of my family are as Disney as I am.
3) I know, shameful, but true.
4) I wonder if the Disney-gene missed a few folks.

5) With that said, we get around it easily.
6) We all go, but let those not interested do other things.
7) As long as we get together for a breakfast or dinner, it works.
8) We let others
. . . veg on the beach
. . . veg at the pool(s)
. . . rent boats
. . . do other "resort" activities or crafts
. . . visit other attractions (Sea World, Universal, Kennedy,etc)
. . . bum around Orlando

We stress that this is a vacation and a time to relax and gt rid of the work-cow-webs. They don't have to do Disney, but come along for the family vacation. Under these conditions, we all seem to have a good time.

 

[Margie J]

Looks like a compromise is in order.

As others said, let your DH do his own things if he goes to WDW with you. Help him discover the world beyond the parks if that is an issue for him.

Try to plan vacations outside of WDW too. With DVC we can travel the real world if we choose to. Even our own Resorts such as HH and VB offer a change of pace .... for everyone. Get him involved in the vacation planning process. Maybe a trip to WDW every other year could make him happier.

 

[Sirius]

I so sorry to hear that. Maybe the best thing to do is to just not bring it up again. When he sees how much fun you are having planning and preparing, maybe he'll get the WDW bug.

My Dw and I both love WDW. We always have the best time. My biggest fear is that a future child of mine will hate going to WDW! Crazy, I know.

Anyway, Happy Thoughts!

 

[teh fish]

pay for me to go in his place....i'm sure that will change his mind.

 

[Pooh's Pal]

Originally posted by teh fish
pay for me to go in his place....i'm sure that will change his mind.

 

[BibbidyBobbidyBoo]

My DH isn't exactly in the "I can't stand Disney World" category- but I guess he's kinda close. He only tolerates it because he knows how Disney-obsessed I am and have been for basically forever (LOL) and he also enjoys seeing the kids have a good time there... but I can definitely see like in the future when the kids are older (or grown) that he might not enjoy going often at all...

The 2nd trip we took (less than a year later- but almost a year later LOL) with DH we just did some different things too. not JUST Disney World theme parks... things we hadn't done on the first trip like miniature golf with the kids, water parks, Disney Quest, ate at some restaurants at other resorts we weren't staying at/had never stayed at, spent more time at World Showcase at Epcot, as well as a night out at PI with the kids babysat at the resort. All in all it worked out well- because DH enjoyed those things more than the theme parks... and it was intermingled with the theme parks in a way that he didn't feel like the entire trip was something he personally did not really enjoy- which is Disney World (but he also just really doesn't enjoy theme park rides either- it's not just a Disney thing with him).

Next time we go on a strictly Disney World trip (ie: not the cruise we already have planned with a few days at WDW thrown in) we're going to compromise even more and go in our TT and stay at WF - it will be more like camping out to him and we'll do things like boating/fishing/etc. He's fine with WDW trips as long as we're also doing things he enjoys.

 

[Reginak]

Why does he not like about WDW? When you went in the past did you "go commando style" and not take a day off for a break to just hang around the resort or does he just not like all of the commercial prepackaged entertainment? Has he been zillions of times? Perhaps if you know why you can find a resolution.
I am a commando-type, I want to squeeze every drop I can out of our trips, but my husband would hate this: he likes to sleep in, sometimes to eleven o'clock!; he says that this is a vacation and to relax, we will come back again. So I restrain myself; I go with his flow, not mine. Perhaps he is the opposite and wishes that every minute was scheduled with at least three sets of contingency plans.
Ask him to help you plan or not plan the trip the way he likes and consider going to Vero Beach at the end of the trip. On your next trip, do an II exchange or World Showcase Exchange, something non-Disney so that he can get value out of those points too and to break up all of your Disney trips.
Ask him what he would like out of any trip and out of any trip to WDW. But Don't Hound Him! And, next time, consult him before you make any plans, perhaps he is just upset that you did all of this planning without asking him first what he would like.
I have had to learn all of this the hard way; my husband likes to pick the approximate time and approximate destation, then hear nothing else. He will say, how about we go next December to this or that place. I then try to make it happen and he hates being bothered about all of the details; however, I can get his input about about decisions along the way as long as I don't bug him.
Finally, what was the article about in the NYT, perhaps this is one key to why he doesn't like WDW (either something in the article or, like my husband, he was trying to make a peace offering by giving you the article and when you said that you would read it later, you hurt his feelings. For some reason beyond my understanding, my husband always takes this as meaning that I only have time for him when it is convenient for me (i.e., he is not important to me - which I find to be a ridiculous assumption). Nonetheless, he is hurt by it, so I have learned to stop and listen.
For what it's worth, I hope that this helps,
Regina

 

[Disney Doll]

You guys are all really nice to your husbands!!!! When DH and I first met, he was not a vacationer...he had been on 2 vacations in his entire "adult" life!!! I, on the other hand, LOVE to travel, and made it pretty clear that with or without him, I'd be travelling. He now loves to travel. I like Judique's idea...put the plans for your vacation next to the plansd for what he needs to get done while you;re gone and watch how fast WDW becomes #1!!!!

 

[Ms. WDW]

Originally posted by SugarBear
I don't suppose a new husband is an option?

LOL....that's cute. But don't get me wrong here...he's a great husband and great dad. We've been together almost forever . We just can't agree on going to WDW "together". He has no problem with me and DS going. He's had it!

I was asked what happened that he disliked WDW so much....Mickey burnout! If you look at my signature, all but the last 3 trips I took, he was with me.

But thanks for all the replies and suggestions. I think the best thing now is just not to bring it up until absolutely necessary. And if he should decide that he really doesn't want to go, so be it. As Granny pointed out, making someone go somewhere they really don't want to be is NOT a vacation. Hummmmm...posting the plans on the refrigerator is another idea. But the "thong bikini".......well I'll have to think about that!

Again, thanks for your kind words and suggestions.....I'll let you all know at a later date what happens!

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

I started a thread a couple of months ago about "Grumpy" spouses, and you would be surprised how many (men AND women) don't like WDW. It boggles the mind.... I have a "Grumpy" spouse who goes along to watch DS4 and DS6 have fun. He joins in too, and sometimes I think he secretly does have fun, but he DOES a lot of complaining, too. Brings his laptop, cellphone, whatever distraction he can. So I just do my thing with the boys, and pretty soon he starts tagging a long. He just doesn't get it and he never will. That is something I will have to accept. At last he has decided that the 10 hour car trip is too painful, so we will start going only (ONLY-I have to keep reminding myself that some people only get to go every 5 years or so!) once a year, and we will fly. Seems like a nice compromise, I hope it works.

Sorry, I don't have any advice about your DH. Why not just let him lay by the pool all day while you are there. My DH would LOVE that, but I need help with the boys for now. And you have your DVC, and your DS, so maybe if you leave DH behind one time, he will realize that he misses it....