I know this sounds terrible, but would you do it?

[sabrecmc]

Well, I guess I'm Mean Mommy b/c for a 12-year-old, I'd say eat it or sit here quietly while we enjoy ourselves (assuming the child didn't have allergies or special dietary needs). Sometimes, its ok not to cater to your child! Heck, at 12, we were running all over the parks by ourselves having a ball back in the day. My parents wouldn't have dreamed of bringing my brother and I to a nice restaurant like that, let alone worry about whether we'd find something on the menu for ourselves, lol.

 

[crisi]

Since we are on picky eaters - my girlfriend has a nephew who she takes care of a lot (like he goes on vacation with them - and us) - the kid is an absolute terror when it comes to food (he is ten now) and has been permitted to be. He will eat peanut butter on white bread, non chunky. He will drink milk.

However, at ten he doesn't know how to make a peanut butter sandwich, and on our last vacation (we share a cabin up North) I ended up in charge of dinner - which he didn't eat - and he demanded his peanut butter. I said no, make it yourself - and I think its the first time anyone ever has with the kid. If a kid wants to be so picky that all they eat is PB (he doesn't even do the J) - fine, but don't expect some near stranger trying to feed twelve people dinner to stop what they are doing to meet your demand. Make the PB yourself! He's ten, not two!

My girlfriend watched me while I explained to this kid that he was going to need to make his own PB ("But I don't know HOW!!!!!" "You are ten, you can figure it out or go hungry. I have to get dinner for twelve people." - She started to get it for him and I looked at her and said "don't you dare, he'll figure it out himself or he won't - but he won't starve in one weekend."

There are valid food issues - and then there is being a spoiled brat. If all the adults around a child jump to meet the kids needs and coax him with his favorite foods (he gets Twinkies if he is hungry), you can't wonder why he won't eat meatloaf.

 

[EnchantedPlayroom]

I think a year old should be able to go to any restaurant and order like an adult. He can have a salad or have something made for him. It's like being a guest at someones home and being quiet about what is served-it's only one meal.

I don't know. I'm 30 and I still can't always order like an adult. I occasionally surf the kids menu.

 

[EnchantedPlayroom]

Well, I guess I'm Mean Mommy b/c for a 12-year-old, I'd say eat it or sit here quietly while we enjoy ourselves (assuming the child didn't have allergies or special dietary needs). Sometimes, its ok not to cater to your child! Heck, at 12, we were running all over the parks by ourselves having a ball back in the day. My parents wouldn't have dreamed of bringing my brother and I to a nice restaurant like that, let alone worry about whether we'd find something on the menu for ourselves, lol.

I do like this idea. Let him run wild while yall eat at the restaurant. Get some of those walkie talkies. Make sure he knows the rules of not leaving the park, not going with any strangers, etc. But my mom would def have just let us go play and ride something else while they ate if I didn't want to eat there.

 

[1hero2princesses]

I agree that some kids are just picky eaters. I guess we need to know what he will eat to try to figure out if it will work? My guess is they may be able to make a plain version of something (like the example of the plain steak). I also really do think they should let him order off the kids menu if that works for him. To those who thing that you can force your kids to be adventurous and love all kinds of foods I just laugh. You get the kids you get, yes, you can influence them but know you can't make them love unusual foods (or textures etc) unless they have some inclination towards that. My DS would eat anything at 2. Vegetables were his favorite and he adored green beans. Won't touch a vegetable now if his life depended on it. Gags and often actually does get sick. And no we don't give them special foods or make them special dinners. Ever. And yes we constantly offer and get them to try new things. And no after a few years of this nothing has changed. My husband will eat darn near anything so we try new things. Honestly I have never been adventureous, still like basic food. Always have, always will, they probably get it from me. Boring taste buds I guess. I have a friend whos son was so obiedient, so well behaved, she was very self righteous to people about their kids behavior. Till she had her second child. Just like the person who said she raised her 3 kids the exact same way and they all had dramatically different eating habits. You get what you get and work with it!

 

[EnchantedPlayroom]

I agree that some kids are just picky eaters. I guess we need to know what he will eat to try to figure out if it will work? My guess is they may be able to make a plain version of something (like the example of the plain steak). I also really do think they should let him order off the kids menu if that works for him. To those who thing that you can force your kids to be adventurous and love all kinds of foods I just laugh. You get the kids you get, yes, you can influence them but know you can't make them love unusual foods (or textures etc) unless they have some inclination towards that. My DS would eat anything at 2. Vegetables were his favorite and he adored green beans. Won't touch a vegetable now if his life depended on it. Gags and often actually does get sick. And no we don't give them special foods or make them special dinners. Ever. And yes we constantly offer and get them to try new things. And no after a few years of this nothing has changed. My husband will eat darn near anything so we try new things. Honestly I have never been adventureous, still like basic food. Always have, always will, they probably get it from me. Boring taste buds I guess. I have a friend whos son was so obiedient, so well behaved, she was very self righteous to people about their kids behavior. Till she had her second child. Just like the person who said she raised her 3 kids the exact same way and they all had dramatically different eating habits. You get what you get and work with it!

I'm laughing thinking of my mother right now. I am, to this day, a pretty picky eater. My mom would give us the "well, pick it off/scrape it off/don't eat it" if we didn't like something. But now that she has a GRAND DAUGHTER.... Burger King doesn't have this satisfaction guarantee like her kitchen does. "Have it your way, right away!!"

 

[decker96]

After reading all these posts about picky eaters...how does one raise a child to not become one? At what age do you start their food adventures?

Somtimes it doesn't matter what you do, they are still picky. My DS is 8 and does not let any piece of fruit pass his lips, EVER. We have tried and tried, but he will not eat any. Even if we can get him to put it in his mouth (which is rare) he spits it out immediately. I think it's a texture/sliminess thing. It started when he was a baby. He never even really liked baby food fruit. He would eat applesauce sometimes and rarely peaches. And I offered him fruit every time I fed him. Once he moved to table food, he refused to eat any kind of fruit even though we continued to offer it all the time and gave him all different types. He was very picky about alot of other foods as well and has gotten better over time, but still eats much less of a variety than my daughters. I always try to have one thing at dinner that I know he will eat (usually meat or a veggie), but I do not make him special meals. Our rule when I make something new is that you have to try one bite. He always does, but rarely ends up liking it. My DH and DD5 will eat pretty much anything. My DD11 and I are less adventurous, but not picky by any means. So how I ended up with a child as picky as him, I have no idea. Just the way he is.

 

[pta-mom]

I've had to go back & read the OP's question because as I've scanned through this thread, I've noticed an awful lot of parenting advice that I don't think she asked for! Why do people feel it's OK to judge how a parent parents her kids when it does not effect you in the least?

To the OP, you asked if anyone thought it might be tacky to bring in another restaurant's meal to feed your 12 year old...yes, in my opinion, that would be tacky.

 

[edk35]

I can understand the OP situation to an extent. We have a VERY PICKY 15 year old. We have NEVER taken in food from another restaurant and we have never tried DDP. I have always felt like the DDP would be a waste of money on him for certain restaurants and we don't always eat at a TS every day. Anyway.....when we do eat at TS places we try to pick places that has something on there he will eat. The restaurants are also good about letting him eat off the kids menu too. The buffets work out the best but again you pay that adult price and he ends up eating rolls/chicken nuggets off the kids buffet. It is frustrating. I understand your situation believe me. He would be perfectly happy eating at the chicken nugget/fry cart close to Canada. I would either ask for something off the kids menu or have him eat before hand and maybe he can get a dessert.

 

[maxiesmom]

I've had to go back & read the OP's question because as I've scanned through this thread, I've noticed an awful lot of parenting advice that I don't think she asked for! Why do people feel it's OK to judge how a parent parents her kids when it does not effect you in the least?

That is what happens when you ask for advice on a public forum. You even get advice on stuff you haven't asked for advice on. Just think how boring it would be if everyone gave just yes or no answers.

 

[ModestMouse]

I've had to go back & read the OP's question because as I've scanned through this thread, I've noticed an awful lot of parenting advice that I don't think she asked for! Why do people feel it's OK to judge how a parent parents her kids when it does not effect you in the least?

In fairness, another poster asked how to introduce foods to eaters to deal with pickiness. People shared their thoughts and experiences on that, which was a much broader question than the OP's.

 

[jm106]

To address OP question, maybe in a new environment he would be more relaxed and willing to try new things? Maybe let him choose a place he would really liek in trade for going and trying a new place. He seems old enough for a compromise.
My DH is much more adventurous on vacation. He used to be picky and I was lucky enough to steer him to the side of enjoying food. His mother catered to the kids and never tried to encourage new things-if kids said they didnt like it they never had to taste it.
As for how- we were expected to try a bite of everything, and I expect the same of my kids. My 3 yo doesnt want kid food, doesn't want french fries, ketchup or nuggets- he will eat salads, meats, spicy... If he turns his nose up at any food, he still needs to try it. Tonight he wanted more salad and bread, and didnt want to try shrimp. Well in order to get what he wanted he has to take a bite. Turns out, he loves it. I dont only give him what he wants, I give him what I am serving, along with it is at least one thing I know he will enjoy(for us its usually veggies he wants more of).

 

[kaytieeldr]

I've had to go back & read the OP's question because as I've scanned through this thread, I've noticed an awful lot of parenting advice that I don't think she asked for! Why do people feel it's OK to judge how a parent parents her kids when it does not effect you in the least?

Honestly? I may be missing something, but I don't see where anyone is giving the OP parenting advice.

A couple of pages before the post I quoted, a different poster asked for advice on how to not raise a picky eater - not in criticism of the OP in ANY way, but as advice for herself.

So, since that question, some responses have been addressed at the OP's specific questions/situation, and other responses have been responses to the other poster's question.

It happens. A lot. Threads get sidetracked. This one seems to be working extremely well - posters are offering advice to both issues.

 

[cdrn1]

he thought it was a fish stick, and he liked it.

Now, there's a tag if ever I saw one!!! Where's a TF when you need one???

 

[ModestMouse]

Now, there's a tag if ever I saw one!!! Where's a TF when you need one???

Uh oh--I'm the one who wrote that, did I do something wrong? I don't know what a tag or a TF is.

 

[kaytieeldr]

No no no! Seeking the Tag Fairy for something someone else posted is a GOOD thing!!!!!

See, right under your id in the left column, it says "Mouseketeer"? That's your tag. That one is standard, based on your number of posts on the DIS (75 moves you from "earning my ears" to "mouseketeer").

Well, you can change that. Go to your User Control Panel, then in the left column, click Edit Your Details.

The second block on that pages is Optional Information, and the first item in that block is Custom User Title. You can put anything you want in there (well, within the DIS guidelines ). Once you save it, that's your "tag".

The Tag Fairy has special powers, used at random, to change any DISer's tag - the ones you see in color, like cdrn1's, were created and granted by the Tag Fairy.

While nobody knows who the Tag Fairy is, and being 'tagged' is entirely random (and flattering ), your "he thought it was a fish stick, and he liked it." is a great line and in the opinion of at least one DISer, deserving of attention by the TF.

 

[JerseyJanice]

After reading all these posts about picky eaters...how does one raise a child to not become one? At what age do you start their food adventures?

You start from the beginning. When a baby starts eating, you start by feeding him much of the same foods you eat for dinner. Feed him the same beef or chicken or pork you eat cut up very small with mashed potatoes or rice. Give him pasta with regular sauce. I think feeding a child normal food from the get-go prevents the "toddler food" syndrome so many American children have.

Another thing to do is have your child help you cook. Preschoolers can help mix things. I learned from my mother by having my toddler stir Jello when he was 2/3 years old. When he got a little older, he helped measure ingredients when I baked. To this day, he helps me with my holiday cookie baking. He loves to roll little balls of dough for thumbprints and Russian teacakes.

Now that he's a preteen, I'm teaching him how to handle a knife by chopping salad ingredients. It's been a gradual thing. Most kids love eating food they helped to make. I say involve them in the kitchen from the get-go and you'll raise a child who appreciates good food.

 

[StrwLady]

My son is 11 years old. He eats limited foods. He eats off the kids menu when we are at Disney. We do the dining plan. For TS restaurants that have a menu we pay out of pocket for something off the kids menu. A kids meal can not be paid for with and Adult Dining Plan TS. Goodness only knows why. They would be making more money off of that. I guess its just some way their system is set up when creating the bill. At buffet meals we use his Adult TS and he normally eats the kids offerings. Then with his unused TS credits we can plan a few extra TS meals (which we again buy him a kids meal)

 

[livinlife25]

Havent read the entire thing...Thought Id throw my 2 cents in..I am 25 and still a picky eater.... If I had to go back and do my childhood over I wish my mom would have made me eat more adventurously instead of always making me something different or bringing me something else to eat....

 

[gigi1313]

You start from the beginning. When a baby starts eating, you start by feeding him much of the same foods you eat for dinner. Feed him the same beef or chicken or pork you eat cut up very small with mashed potatoes or rice. Give him pasta with regular sauce. I think feeding a child normal food from the get-go prevents the "toddler food" syndrome so many American children have.

Another thing to do is have your child help you cook. Preschoolers can help mix things. I learned from my mother by having my toddler stir Jello when he was 2/3 years old. When he got a little older, he helped measure ingredients when I baked. To this day, he helps me with my holiday cookie baking. He loves to roll little balls of dough for thumbprints and Russian teacakes.

Now that he's a preteen, I'm teaching him how to handle a knife by chopping salad ingredients. It's been a gradual thing. Most kids love eating food they helped to make. I say involve them in the kitchen from the get-go and you'll raise a child who appreciates good food.

i did all that, ds is an accomplished cook and is going to two weeks of culinary camp this summer... YET, he was still a picky pain in the patooty eater for at least 5 years... it's only in the last two years he's starting to eat more than bologna/hot dogs/burgers but only the fast food kind w/no "grill marks"... he wouldn't eat the hot dog at lecellier because of the grill marks 3 years ago!

now, he has broadened his horizons... most of his "new food" discoveries came at WDW... mainly due to free dining 'cause he was permitted to try something and if he didn't like it, get another meal... 9 out of 10 times he skipped the "'nother" meal!