I just needed to talk to someone today

[tigercat]

It is late and I really should be in bed but it has been a hard day today. My son died 25 yrs. ago today and I think every year that I will be okay. THis day though I just can't seem to get through without being upset. No one wants to know about it or let me talk. I have to be sad away from everyone. I am normally fine with it, just not on his anniversary. He would have been 25 yrs. old on Mothers day this year. I tried bringing it up with 2 people today so that I could talk to someone but my Mum dismissed it and then proceded to talk about politics. My good friend, after being told that it was 25 yrs. said that's nice and then told me about her visit with her Mum on mothers day. No one except my sil has EVER let me talk about it. They have always hidden it away. As I said though I don't go on about it even on the anniversary, I would like to say something on that day though. I am asking too much? I feel so alone.
tigercat

 

[janette]

 

[Stepharoonie!]

 

[Pin Wizard]

Hugs, tigercat! I'm sorry no one will listen. I have days like that on anniversary dates also. And sometimes I just want to scream and pull my hair out on those days. It seems so insensitive that there's no one to listen. It always will be a tough day for you...it was your son! Hugs and prayers for you!

 

[Dan Murphy]

Just sent you a PM, Tigercat.

 

[Planogirl]

I'm so sorry tigercat. I'm glad that you posted here because you're definitely not alone.

 

[piglet too]

I am so sorry that your son died. I can not even imagion my life without one of my kids. Please know that we are all here for you. I know it is not really "talking" but feel free to tell us what you want to. You are not alone here in your grief. http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?s=&threadid=561141
There are a lot of us here on the CB, as you can see in this thread.

 

[tigercat]

THank you everyone for listening to me. I am going to try and go to bed now so my dh doesn't wake up. I just needed a cry and can't do that around him or anyone else for that matter. It's the one period of time I could really use a sleeping pill LOL. The hugs feel great.
tigercat

 

[Dan Murphy]

's Now scoot off to bed, tigercat, so nice talking.

And remember, a mark he has made, forever. Also, somebody is most always here, regardless the hour, if you feel you need a shoulder or two. A wonderful link there that Kirsten posted too, I've read a lot of that one, very supportive.

{hugs}

 

[mamajoan]

a big hug for you ... an an open forum at the Dis....

sometimes it helps just to write it down and know that someone else is reading it....

after my son Marcus died, 22 years ago this month, the local priest told me something I have never forgotten.

Every life has a purpose. Some lives take 98 years to accomplish their purpose.... for Marcus his purpose was accomplished in his three days upon this earth.
Please know that your son had a purpose too.

God love and keep you close.

Joan

 

[Robinrs]

Tigercat...

There is no limit to the years a Mother grieves. She grieves for her child till she dies, it never goes away.

My son died 17 years ago. Every year I think of what he'd look like, what my life would be like, who he'd be. When I lost him I spoke to a woman who lost a child in 1961 who STILL grieved. It made me realize that I would never forget him.

Like you, NO ONE in my family wants to talk about it. I had to realize that all of them have filed it away because they have their own pain to deal with. It will never be the same as a mother, her connection to the life growing inside her will never be theirs. Your pain is YOURS, don't expect them to understand because they can't.

Realize that you will always grieve for your child and it's alright. Fnd a source, as you did here, and relive and release. It's a healing process that we all need.

PM me if you want to talk.

God bless,

Robinrs

 

[Pooh93]

Many {{{{HUGS}}}} sent your way. You are not alone.

 

[powellrj]

I am so sorry you are going throught this alone tonight,just know that you are in others thoughts

 

[Pop Daddy]

hey

 

[browneyes]

You're not asking too much. What was your son's name?

 

[Serena]

Tigercat, I'm really sorry. Just know that you aren't alone.
I found the best place to cry without bothering anyone is in the shower. It allows the release without making anyone uncomfortable.
And the dis is great. I was able to let out my feelings and someone was always there to talk to. I'd get hugs, advice, someone would make me see things in a different way, or just make me laugh out loud. I don't know what I would have done without that.
Take care, your son is with you always.

 

[Poohstyx]

You are not alone! DH & I HAVE (not had) a son who died 17 yrs ago. We still celebrate his b'day with pizza - his favorite food! We still talk about him and the goofy things he would do. Our 11 y/o DgrD knows all about him. We have pix of him on display - just like the rest of our family pix. He did not cease to exist for us when he died. We do find that some people get uncomfortable when he is mentioned. When they find that we are ok talking about him - they seem ok with it. I think they just don't know what to say to us. David is still very much a part of our lives.
Our son was a Navy Corpsman at the time of his death (auto accident). He was 19½ when he died - he would be 37 this year - I still think of him as 19! I really wish he could be here to enjoy our grandkids.

PM or e-mail me anytime. I love to talk about my son! You can talk to me anytime about anything.

Take care ~
Phyllis AKA Poohstyx

 

[holycow]

I'm so sorry no one will listen....(((((((HUGS))))))))))))) to you
I can only imagine how difficult it has been over the years.


Lisa

 

[KristiKelly]

, I'm so sorry, I can't begin to imagine how you're feeling, but will listen

 

[dizneenut]