I invited 4 kids to a movie. Should I pay?

[MrsPete]

I'm with the majority here: If you invite other children to take part in an activity, you pay -- especially since cost wasn't discussed up front. Yes, it would've been wise to check the price up front, but I probably wouldn't have done so either; I would've just assumed that it's a regularly-priced movie.

At this point, I'd just suck it up and pay for the tickets . . . but I would tell them, "no snacks this time". My own kids know that sometimes I'll pop for snacks (no pun intended), other times I won't.

Now, there are some circumstances in which the kids might end up going "dutch". For example, a bunch of our kids love going to "skate night" once a month, and we moms take turns driving them. It isn't like the mom who drives particularly invited them to go -- instead, it's a school event. So they all bring their own money. And if teens make plans to get together, that's more of a kids-planning-their-own-thing deal, not a parent inviting other children to take part in something.

 

[kimberlym4]

If I invite, I pay- movies, bowling, vacations, whatever---if I invite then I expect to be paying. My daughter is going in a few minutes to see the movie, she is going with her friend, the mom bought 15 tickets and told her to invite who she wants- they are paying and then going out to applebees for lunch afterward.

Did they say up front they were paying? That's a lot of money to lay out. In this situation I would totally assume that I was going to pay for my child and be thankful that someone else has done the planning, the acquiring of tickets, the transporting and the supervising of 15 young girls.

I knew that all of your responses would be "you invite, you pay" but I just don't think that "rule" always applies. I always offer to pay my kids share (unless it's a birthday party) and consider it rude not to offer. For example, yesterday was a snow day and one kid call/e-mailed a bunch of kids in her class about going to a movie. Her mom called me and said she would pick up the girls. I would never assume in that case that they would also pay for her yet nowhere in the conversation did the other mother say "don't forget the movie costs $7".

In the OP's situation I guess I'd eat the cost but really hope that there were some thoughtful parents that sent money with their kids.

 

[Deb & Bill]

If you invited them, you pay. That's what we have done for years whenever we allowed our son to invite friends to go to the movie or a concert or ice show, whatever, with us. The kids usually bring some money with them, but we pay for the tickets and we usually spring for the snacks, too.

 

[robinb]

Thanks everyone!

We had a "trial run" today since everyone was geared up to see a movie. I had originally invited everyone for today's show but it was sold out. The local theater runs a "Frosty Flicks Series" for only $2.50 and that includes a free small popcorn. The $4.50 Icees are extra, of course. We saw "Alvin and the Chipmunks" and then we went for pizza. When I called the parents to let them know that the Hannah Montana thing was postponed I did mention it was a "cheapie" movie of only $2.50 and all but one parent sent money to cover their kids. I *think* the other parent sent money too, but the little girl said the money was her allowance. She's a big fibber, but I took her at her word. I would never take a kids allowance away!

I think I'll just roll with it. If someone gives me money I'll take it. I was pretty shocked when the price tag was $15 each! I expected less than $10, but the Hannah Montana Juggernaut costs a lot to power.

Lesson learned: be clear on what I will pay for when I invite kids.

 

[Heather1101]

If we INVITE someone to the movies, lunch, or whatever...we pay.
If we say you are welcome to come along...they pay their way.

 

[aprilgail2]

Did they say up front they were paying? That's a lot of money to lay out. In this situation I would totally assume that I was going to pay for my child and be thankful that someone else has done the planning, the acquiring of tickets, the transporting and the supervising of 15 young girls.

.

Yes, when I asked how much they said it was all their treat.

 

[momx2]

Since this invitation seemed more like you were not expecting them to pay for it, I would go into this expecting to pay 100%. That way if the kids bring their own money it will be a nice surprise and if they don't bring a dime, you won't be shocked. Most parents these days will send their kids with the money to cover everything, but not everyone has caught onto that idea yet.

In our area that isn't an idea any of us have. Invitations to movies or any events the inviting parent pays for it. Most of the time the parents will ask when we invite. I say "no, just send money for snacks or whatever." It is the same way if my DDs get invited somewhere. None of the parents I know would send their kids with enough money for the event plus snacks. If they did I wouldn't take it unless I had told the parents up front to sent it. I think it would be rude to go ask for the money now. I got stuck in a worse situtation this fall. I had no idea how much Hannah Montana concert tickets were going to cost me when I invited 2 of my DDs friends!