disnutt said:
I'm going to be a SAHM starting next Friday at 4:00 p.m.
I never thought I would want to do it and one reason was the fact that I couldn't imagine doing housework all day.
Me, too!!!
I quit my job last August to be a SAHM. I also had never seen myself as a SAHM. I hate housework, and I thought the kids would drive me nuts, and that I would miss the adult interaction. I had a hard time going back to work after my 2nd son was born, and at the time we couldn't afford for me to stay home. A year later, after re-working our finances, a pay raise for DH and DS5 being old enough for kindergarten it all fell into place.
I love not getting up at 4:30a.m. to be to work by 6:00. I love not having to 'discuss' with DH which of us had more important stuff at work and who should stay home with a sick child. I love seeing my boys' faces in the morning. I love walking DS5 to school, and taking a leisurely walk around the neighborhood with DS2.
I don't miss the stress of the office. I don't miss the office politics. I do miss my friends, but make a point to go into the office for lunch once a month (with the kids.) I do miss the social interaction, but DS2 and I take parent/child classes together (music, art and gym) and have a lot of fun with other moms and toddlers.
You know what? The job change didn't turn me into Susie Homemaker. I still hate housework. I thought I would have more time to do it, but with kids underfoot 24/7, I actually have less. And since we're home more than before, there's even more mess to clean up! But I didn't quit my paying job to clean house for free; I did it to spend more time with my children, so that's what I do, and I clean when I can.
For all the squabbles, mess, dishes, cooking all our meals at home, I really am loving it. I worried that I was making a selfish decision, that it would put too much financial burden on DH, that I was depriving DS2 of the socialization and educational opportunities by taking him out of the Montessori school/daycare. But my DH tells me nearly daily how grateful he is that I did this. No stress about home life for him anymore, no worries that the kids are OK, no push on the weekends to get all the errands and chores done before Monday. We have more time together since we don't have staggered work schedules, and our pace of life is just slower, simpler, and more fun.
On other websites I visit, any issue always seems to wind up in a debate on whether mothers should work outside the home, which I hate. Why can there only be one right way? Why do people think that, as diverse as we all are, that there's a one-size-fits-all solution? I've done both, I've enjoyed both, and everyone has different needs and desires. For me, at this time in our life, this is the right decision. For my working friends, all of them wonderful, loving mothers, their needs and desires vary and they've made decisions that work for their families.
I hope that, whether you work outside the home or are a SAHM, that you do what's right for you and for your loved ones. Give them the gift of a happy, loving mother, and you can't go wrong.
And PS. I'll be looking into flylady, MOMS and MOPS! Thanks!