I have a problem, a big problem....

[minniecarousel]

It's very common for pediatric dentists to not allow parents in the back office. Kids usually do better without their parents around. I believe every one of these offices are a large workroom, with no hidden areas - no place for a child to be completely alone with any one adult.

I never had a problem with my kids seeing the dentist without me.

As far as a physician, they didn't go into the exam room without me until they got to be maybe 12, I'm thinking. If they wanted me to go in, like with a broken bone, I would. And the ER, I stayed with my 17 year old!

 

[chager]

I understand a dentist, since DS14 goes back by himself both there and the orthodontist. The only other time he goes in alone is with his psychologist or his physical therepist. He does not go back alone in any other medical situation. First off he would never remember instructions, he would probably forget to give a symptom, and he does not know his family medical history. He is only a child and shouldn't be expected to know all that.
At any rate I think it is time for the OP to see what is out there.

 

[lisadr]

I wonder where the Op went now that they got everybody in a frenzy

 

[Teresa Pitman]

It's very common for pediatric dentists to not allow parents in the back office. Kids usually do better without their parents around. I believe every one of these offices are a large workroom, with no hidden areas - no place for a child to be completely alone with any one adult.

I never had a problem with my kids seeing the dentist without me.

As far as a physician, they didn't go into the exam room without me until they got to be maybe 12, I'm thinking. If they wanted me to go in, like with a broken bone, I would. And the ER, I stayed with my 17 year old!

I just wanted to comment that I don't really believe kids "do better" without their parents around. They may seem to "behave better" because they are scared not to behave, and they may suppress their emotions (not crying or complaining) because they don't feel safe to express them. But when researchers measure the child's stress hormones, they are MUCH, MUCH higher when the parent isn't there. So the child isn't really "doing better."

The first dentist my children went to ALWAYS had the parents come in with the child. His office was set up with a chair for the parents right beside the child's chair - or you had the option of holding the child on your lap. He also had things set up so that parents being treated could bring their children, and the child could sit beside you and watch you getting your teeth cleaned or filled - he even had a little table with crayons and crafts where kids would sit and play right beside the parent while the parent was having work done. He did this to help the kids feel relaxed and at home in the dentist's office and boy it worked. My kids never minded going to the dentist at all - they were used to seeing me get work done and it was a relaxed and happy place for them.


Teresa

 

[EpcotBeauty]

I wonder where the Op went now that they got everybody in a frenzy

Still here. Sometimes it is best to let the "frenzy" feed on itself. No matter what I say now, it will be twisted and turned, so believe whatever you will.

 

[minniecarousel]

Yeah - mine were never fearful at the dentists' and I NEVER went back with them. I think too many parents throw "dentist anxiety" onto their kids.

I've never read any studies on this, so ya got me there.

 

[kirbsam]

Harping? She just told us what happened. If this story isn't believable then neither are another 75% of the stories people tell on this board.

i agree with that actually at least from the fact that most stories we hear are very, very slanted.

 

[npmommie]

Plenty of doctors open on Christmas day...They are Jewish doctors in religious neighborhoods...with mainly Jewish Clients...yes...they are open on Christmas Day. Just go to Boro Park Brooklyn, Lakewood NJ, and many others. Yeshivas are open on Christmas Day..unless it coincides with their Chanukah break.

ahh yes, I didn't think of that. It just isn't common in the medical community I am accustomed to here.
I worked in practice with a Jewish doctor, we closed on christmas day and for the jewish holidays. but our patient base was not predominately Jewish either.

 

[RNMOM]

Still here. Sometimes it is best to let the "frenzy" feed on itself. No matter what I say now, it will be twisted and turned, so believe whatever you will.

EpcotBeauty, I'm still here also. I can't/don't understand negativity. Ah well. I do hope your circumstance gets a great resolution. Thanks for letting us know you are here.

 

[disneymyway]

Yeah - mine were never fearful at the dentists' and I NEVER went back with them. I think too many parents throw "dentist anxiety" onto their kids.

I've never read any studies on this, so ya got me there.

So you would be OK with a preschool that didn't allow you in the classroom?

With a preschooler, no one is going to tell me I'm not allowed to be with them ever.

Like I said, if I know the dentist, I might not have a problem, but with strangers, sorry, I am cautious. I don't get parents who aren't concerned with this, but I can only worry about my own.

 

["Got Disney"]

The man must be an idiot if he doesn't want parents in the room with him, he stands the risk of being accused of inappropriatly touching a child and how does he disprove that?

As long as there is a nurse in the room at all time they do not have a problem.....as for the law that is. I have always been expected to be in the Peds office when bringing in my boys.....could not imagine being told I cant.

We actually had a pediatric dentist that discouraged parents from going back with the kids. Needless to say..he is our former dentist.

My pediatric dentist never has parents back with them when they are there. It is a large practice and when they are getting there teeth cleaned there are also others next to them getting there teeth cleaned. And when they are working on there teeth for other reasons there are also others getting worked on. I dont know many other Ped dentists that have the parents sit there and watch while there kids are getting there teeth filled or cleaned. Maybe if it was a one Dentist practice with one child in there at a time..

They call the names the kids go back on there own and when done the Dental Assistant calls ya back and the Dentist talks to you on what is going on wiht there teeth.

they also go back by themselves with there braces...same thing same pracatice but with there Orthodontist.

 

[minniecarousel]

So you would be OK with a preschool that didn't allow you in the classroom?

With a preschooler, no one is going to tell me I'm not allowed to be with them ever.

Like I said, if I know the dentist, I might not have a problem, but with strangers, sorry, I am cautious. I don't get parents who aren't concerned with this, but I can only worry about my own.

I know the OP was talking about a physician, but dentists were brought up.

NO - I would not be OK with a preschool or day care provider who didn't have an open door policy!

So, do you intend to stay with your child at preschool all day?

 

[lisadr]

EpcotBeauty, I'm still here also. I can't/don't understand negativity. Ah well. I do hope your circumstance gets a great resolution. Thanks for letting us know you are here.

I am not being negative-I just have a bad feeling that this post has an ulterior motive and the OP might be trying to push our buttons. That's why I asked for more info because I am trying to make 2+2=4, but it's just not.

If this is really happening like the OP says then I apologize and hope it all gets better for them-but right now I still have doubts.

 

[chris1gill]

Nope, they belong to the "practice". He is demanding about NO Holisitic medicine at all, NO PARENTS can come back with the children and payment must be made in full up front. Just such a huge change from what we did before.

Uh, I just walked into the MRI room with my kid last night. There is no way my daughter is going into any doctors office without me, period, end of discussion. I am sure I am not the only parent to feel this way. Honestly, if this is the business he wants to run, perhaps it's for the best for you to find someplace else more accommodating.

 

[MELSMICE]

With a preschooler, no one is going to tell me I'm not allowed to be with them ever.

This is OT, but do you mean in all aspects of life, including when they go to a preschool class setting of any kind.

I ask, because I teach dance to preschool students. Parents are allowed to walk their child in to class, however, they are required to leave the room. The folding door is shut during class & parents are allowed to view the class through our viewing window.

Having parents in the room in this setting is distractive to everyone in the class including the other students, the student of the parent that wants to stay & the teaching staff.

In some situations, parents do need to step back and allow their children to become independent. If a child can not be left alone then they are not ready for that setting.

Sorry to get OT in this thread.

 

[disneymyway]

This is OT, but do you mean in all aspects of life, including when they go to a preschool class setting of any kind.

.

I would never have put my preschooler in a situation where I was literally not ALLOWED in the room. Call me paranoid, but I just wouldn't.

I didn't hang out at her preschool but I knew that if I wanted to drop in I could. We weren't barred from doing that. It's about being open and above board to me, not about having to be there. If they aren't willing to let me in the room as a matter of policy I have a problem with that.

I have better things to do than hang out at a preschool dance class, but if I knew that I could poke my head in and see what was going on, that's all I'd require.

 

[disneymyway]

So, do you intend to stay with your child at preschool all day?

My child is all grown up and I rarely was in her preschool class. But I knew that I could if I wanted to because the school told us were welcome to drop in any time. None of us did very often, because that time was too valuable to get things done without them!

But just knowing I could made all the difference. I remember preschools that didn't have that open door policy getting in trouble at one time. They were accused of child molestation because they didn't let the parents even see what the kids were doing. I don't know if they really molested the kids or not, but they really left themselves open to the accusation by having the clandestine classroom policy.

 

[teacups]

I ask, because I teach dance to preschool students. Parents are allowed to walk their child in to class, however, they are required to leave the room. The folding door is shut during class & parents are allowed to view the class through our viewing window.

Having parents in the room in this setting is distractive to everyone in the class including the other students, the student of the parent that wants to stay & the teaching staff.

.

This is why my daughter hated dance class and we didnt go back after the first class (This was years ago). We watched thru the glass like we were told, and I'm sorry but three and four year olds WANT to know their parents are watching "See what I did Mommy?" When she turned to look at the window and wave she was scolded. Come on... that is just not cool at that age. Sorry. OT of this thread....

 

[MELSMICE]

I have better things to do than hang out at a preschool dance class, but if I knew that I could poke my head in and see what was going on, that's all I'd require.

At my studio, the parents can view the entire class through a viewing window. We have nothing to hide. "Poking your head in", whether anyone believes it or not, is disruptive to the class.

I have had parents "poke their heads in" to "say hi" or snap a photo. I have kindly asked them to "please close the door, the students will be done soon & all pictures can be taken before or after class."

I just don't think it's fair for one parent to disrupt an entire class of children because they choose not to follow the rules (not speaking of you in particular, just in general). That is why we installed a viewing window years ago.

 

[MELSMICE]

This is why my daughter hated dance class and we didnt go back after the first class (This was years ago). We watched thru the glass like we were told, and I'm sorry but three and four year olds WANT to know their parents are watching "See what I did Mommy?" When she turned to look at the window and wave she was scolded. Come on... that is just not cool at that age. Sorry. OT of this thread....

We actually encourage the children to wave to their parents through the window. The children can't see their parents, however, we tell them we know that "all the mommies & daddies" are watching & we can wave to them any time we want to.