I hate my job!

[T16GEM]

I have been working for the same company for two years now and I absolutley hate it!!!! I am a buyer in construction, which actully isn't that bad. My main problem is the people! My boss appears to dislike me for no apparent reason, I can't think of anything that I could have done to upset him, I knew when I came aboard that I was entering a male dominated environment and at the time that didn't bother me, I now feel that I am being singled out for being the wrong sex.

This week I have felt that he wants me to fail in what I am doing and if he makes my life a misery that I will eventually cave in and leave (I feel like just walking out today!). I get on really really well with everyone else in my department and have no problems with them. I keep getting given work to do and I don't get it explained to me, and when I ask questions he huffs at me as if to say "Well you should know that" .

I just don't know what to do! I don't want to air my views with him as I think it would make it worse but still I can't go on like this, every day that I get up and know that he is going to be in the office a dread it. I really don't want to leave but I hate being treated differently.

 

[signtalker]

I know how you feel, Ive spent over 2 years being subjected to workplace bullying!

I had a stretch off with stress, but have now taken control, and reduced my working week to that of 16 hours to cover my contract with this firm.
I am working freelance for myself (at times), so I can please myself and only answer to me

I have now also taken a job as a disney cast member, pays not that good, but for the first time in ages im happy, and less stressed.

Dont let them grind you down

 

[KayleeUK]

{{{{HUGS}}}}

Don't know what to say really, is there anyone else at work who could help you??

 

[Terry&Janet]

Is the construction company one of the big ones ?

If so, maybe there's a personnel dept you could get in touch with?

I imagine if the company is a small privately owned one that it might be more difficult to sort things out.

One other question I have is.... have you dare I ask, spoken to the Boss concerned ? It might be that he would be horrified to see the words on this thread and is unaware of what he's doing to you.

Good Luck.

Terry

 

[Claire44]

Sorry to hear you are so unhappy at work. A similar thing happened to my daughter, she felt her boss was pulling her up for things which were exactly the same as others were doing but only her getting told about it - in front of the others as well. She decided she had either got to leave or confront her boss, when she explained to her boss how she felt her boss couldn't have been more apologetic and said my daughter should have spoken out before if she was so unhappy - things have now improved tremendously and my daughter is now happy at work.

It may be worth you having a quiet word with your boss and explaining how you feel, with the sounds of things it is hardly going to make things any worse. Whatever you decide don't let it make you ill - it's not worth it.

 

[scousemouse36]

LIFE IS TO SHORT

LEAVE

 

[hyzdufan]

Originally posted by scousemouse36
LIFE IS TO SHORT

LEAVE

Word to that, you can do better somewhere else.

 

[Sue & Co.]

Once upon a time (before children) I also suffered problems at work but because I had children and took a career break they resolved that way so {{{HUGS}}}} to you.

I am so lucky now, I have a job that I enjoy, which lets me work from home 70% of the time so school holidays are not a problem and which is comparatively well paid (for part time work from home).

I hope you can resolve this because it makes your whole life miserable having a bad time at work.

Sue

 

[T16GEM]

Thanks for your feedback and hugs! I think I might try and talk to him about it, although plucking up the courage to do it will be difficult! I know that I can't go on like I am at the moment and need to do something about it.

I think I will just try to keep smiling! and think of my November trip!

 

[KayleeUK]

Keep smiling and think of Disney

 

[WDWfan uk]

Do you have specific instances you can raise with him or is it just a general atmosphere? I'd think carefully so that if you do raise this problem with him, you can give him specific occasions where you have felt that he was treating you unfairly.

You will need to be in a frame of mind where you will be sounding constructive and conciliatory so that it doesn't come across as if you are maknig him an ultimatum.

Is it at all possible that he sees you as more capable than the others and so gives you more work to do?


I'm really sorry that you feel this way - but since it is somewhere where you spend so much time in the working week, it is important that you try to remedy the situation - good luck.

 

[Madjock]

I had a very similar situation a few years ago with a female boss. She and I just didn’t click and she made my life very difficult. I decided to face the situation head on and have a word with her but, and these are her exact words which I still remember to this day, she told me “if you don’t like it you know where the door is”! The stubborn side of my nature made me determined that the witch wasn’t going to win but in the end I was so miserable it was affecting other areas of my life. Finally I realised that by staying and being so miserable I was cutting off my nose to spite my face so after 6 months of misery enough was enough and I left. I got another job within a week and have now been there for the last 8 years and couldn’t be happier!

I would say speak to him first, like others have said he may not realise but if he does and its intentional and nothing changes then I would say just leave because no job is worth the misery, the work day is too long and life really is too short!

Annmarie

p.s. Good luck whatever you decide to do

 

[T16GEM]

Well here's an update on my job situation:

I went to a meeting the other day and after it my boss sat down with me and asked me what was wrong, ( I Hadn't been feeling too well) I expalined how i felt and that I felt as though I was being treated unfairly and that his attituide towards me appeared to be different. Much to my amazement he said that he hadn't meant to upset me and that he was pleased with the work that I have been doing of late.

I feel now as though the air has been cleared and that I have a little bit less to stress about - I have my exams next week for my post grad course, So I am worrying a bit about those too.

Thanks for all your advice and kind wishes.

Gems

 

[SidB]

Two words.

Constructive dismissal.

 

[T16GEM]

do you think sidB?

 

[Hilary]

Well done for having the confidence to tell your boss what was upsetting you - it would have been very easy to pretend everything was okay when he asked you, but still feel the same on the inside. You have made a major step forward by airing your unhappiness.

I hope that hearing your boss tell you he is pleased with your work will either allow you to continue in this job in a happier atmosphere, or give you the confidence to apply for another job, knowing that you're perfectly capable at what you do.

Good luck, whichever course you choose.

 

[SidB]

Originally posted by T16GEM
do you think sidB?

I'm not the person to give you legal advise. I'd be straight down to the Citizen's Advise Bureau though. From my personal experience most companies would rather pay compensation than go to law.

If the stress is effecting your health, and it sounds like it is, see your GP. I saw mine and he advised me to buy a certain book and try the relaxation techniques in it. They only partially worked, but at least I'd put it on my medical records, just in case. In the end I got a small pay-off and some of my self respect back. I'm now earning much more and enjoying my life.

Personally I'd rather be broke and stress free than be in that position again.