I don't know what to do? School related

[ntburns22]

So my DD's first year of school is about to come to a close. Well, she is no more advanced in her academics then she was on day one. She went to preschool at 3 1/2 and the teachers commented on how quick she was pick up on things. She was a bright little girl at that time. The following year we moved so we just kept her home and did workbooks and such during the day. This past year she started school and I am not impressed. They just finished their last letter of the week. This is stuff she learned 2 years ago. They are not reading yet.
Today I called the 2 private schools in town. One told me normally if a student is not reading level ones on their own by the end of the year they would be held back. So there is a chance that DD would be held back if we sent her there. The other school would take her but said she would be behind but if she was a hard worker she would be OK. They have had a lot of transfers from the public school in the past few years so they know where she is and how to help her.
DH and I don't know what to do. I feel like I let my DD down. Atleast I know not to send DS to the public school when it is his time.

 

[jenks0718]

My ds is in public school and by the end of Kindergarten he was beginning to read. He is now leaving 1st grade and he is reading like a champ and also doing math that sometimes makes my head spin. Is she coming out of Kindergarten right now?

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Are you against holding her back?

I suppose my thought would be..I would rather hold her back 1 year now and go to a better school than remain in a school where the kids were not taught to be able to read by the end of K.

Even in Missouri they would have made you go to summer school to learn and then if you did not advance they would have you repeat K.

That is certainly a dilemma.

 

[ntburns22]

My ds is in public school and by the end of Kindergarten he was beginning to read. He is now leaving 1st grade and he is reading like a champ and also doing math that sometimes makes my head spin. Is she coming out of Kindergarten right now?

She is finishing up Kindergarten. Her last day is June 1. I just don't seem them picking it up now.

 

[ntburns22]

Are you against holding her back?

I suppose my thought would be..I would rather hold her back 1 year now and go to a better school than remain in a school where the kids were not taught to be able to read by the end of K.

Even in Missouri they would have made you go to summer school to learn and then if you did not advance they would have you repeat K.

That is certainly a dilemma.

Holding her back is the main dilemma I guess. She is already a good 5 inches taller then most of her classmates and she knows it. DH doesn't want her held back at all. I really am unsure of how I feel. I just want the best for her and feel I have failed her.

 

[daisyduck123]

1st grade teacher here....I'm wondering why your DD hasn't begun reading this year anyway. Many times, bright Kindergarteners pick up on reading anyway (by being read to often at home) even though they have not been formally taught in school yet.

We get many students entering Kindergarten who can read a little. Then, by Christmas or so, are reading at a pp.2 or pp3, even though their in-class instruction is not at that level.

 

[golfgal]

How old is your DD? Reading at the end of kindergarten is nice but not all kids are ready to do that. Reading isn't really something that is "taught" at this age, yes, they learn the letters and sounds and whatnot but reading comes when their brain is developmentally ready to read. Basically a switch goes on in their brains and they can read, slowly at first but they can read.

Most schools aren't even concerned about kids that can't read until 2nd grade. Starting to read young has NOTHING to do with how smart or advanced a child is. Some children develop physically faster then they do mentally and your child may be riding a bike before her friends and her friends may be reading a book first. They are both right on schedule.

Most kids in our twins' class were not reading at the end of kindergarten but they were ALL reading by Halloween of 1st grade. Give it 6 more months and I bet she will be reading like a champ.

Now, if she doesn't know all her letters, upper and lower case, can't count to 100, doesn't know the colors, shapes and can't write her name, then holding her back in kindergarten might be in her best interest. If she can do all of those but just can't read, holding her back may be a mistake.

 

[tw1nsmom]

Just to throw in a different point of view...

Reading isn't all instructional. It's also developmental. Some children just aren't ready to read independently until as late as seven years old. Once they begin they quickly catch up.

I for one am glad that our school doesn't rush the reading process. Children aren't expected to read independently in our school until first grade. You may want to talk to the public school about their overall curriculum philosophy.

 

[cleo]

A 4 year old has to be a 'hard worker' to make it in their school? That breaks my heart. I'd run miles from any school that said something like that.

I have a friend whose son couldn't read until well into 2nd grade. He didn't walk until he was over 2 years old. He's now an attorney, he reads just fine, and he can walk, too!

Your daughter isn't behind, regardless of what the schools might be teaching her or telling you. She's just a few minutes past being a baby, for heaven's sake! Give her a minute and she'll learn what she needs to learn.

 

[ntburns22]

My DD is 6 with a January b-day. We read with her all the time. She can pick out sight words. But when it come to sounding things out and putting it together is where she has the problems and she doesn't want to hear it from mom and dad. She responds better to other adults. She is behind her cousins that go to school in other districts.

She can identify her color words, count to 200 ( that is as far as I have taken it by ones), we have started simple math at home and practice writing. I would love to hear what else I can do with her.

 

[Daxx]

Kdg. teacher here. Find out what the 1st grade teacher's expectations for her students are. If they're expected to read, then you will have something solid to base your decision on.

Does your DD know her letter sounds? In order to read, you have to be able to recognize your alphabet letters randomly (not rote - A, B, C). She also needs to know the sounds the letters make including the short vowel sounds. Is she able to recognize letter sounds in words? For example, can she pick out the b, the u and the g in the word bug? These are the things she needs to do before she can learn to read.

From there, you can work on sounding out the letters and blending them together (ie: start w/easy endings -at, -ot, -an, -ap, -et, -up, etc.). Get her to blend those sounds and then add the beginning letter sound (ie: c-a-t) and have her sound and blend those letter sounds to form words. Also, sound the letters out (ie: make the b sound, the u sound and the g sound)and ask her to blend those sounds together out loud and ask her what word you're trying to say.

Is her school sending home sight words for her to learn? A Kdg. student should recognize 100 sight words before going into 1st grade. You can find these on the internet. These are words your child needs to know by looking at them rather than sounding them out (ie: me, he, she, the, my, that, and, etc.).

Right now, my students are sounding out words and reading them. They are also taking home a "sight word journal" which is a tablet containing 10 words for them to learn each week. I started off w/5 words a month ago and built up to 10. Note -- not every word is a sight word -- about half of the 10 words are words they can sound out. Parents are expected to help their child learn these words. We use them every day in class, so the journals are extra practice.

I am not sure about your child's program at school ... they may do more beginning to read in 1st grade. I know that, in my school, it is my job to have them sounding out and blending sounds into words and actually reading small sentences (The bug is in the rug.). However, every school and school system differs. You could always ask the 1st grade teacher what she expects of your child.

As for holding a child back ... I find it preferential to hold a child back in Kdg. over an upper level. If you hold back in the upper level, I find that's when the "failure chain" starts -- they think they're stupid, they wonder why they should bother, they feel like failures.

Why don't you also talk to the Kdg. teacher about why she's not started to read. Maybe there are some good answers.

As for my students, we just started our unit on Geometry (solid shapes - cone, sphere, cube, cylinder and fractions) and I'm worried that they're not going to get to the addition and subtraction portion of math before the end of the year. I have, through various other exercises, taught some addition and subtraction ... but I'd prefer if they had some more of it. I know that the 1st grade teacher will start where I left off, so if I don't cover the entire unit of addition/subtraction, I know she will start off w/that. This year, the students have a good grasp on the Reading/LA/Phonics and a not-so-great grasp on the math. Some units have taken longer for them to understand, so we're working at a bit of a slower math pace w/this group.

Good luck to you ... you can always work on teaching her to read over the summer. But, remember, in order to read, she needs to know that alphabet randomly, as well as the letter sounds!

***ETA -- Everything I've stated goes on what my school expects of its students and of me, as their teacher. I am not saying that every kid in the USA who is in Kdg. should know their 100 sight words or s/b ready to read going into 1st grade -- it's just what my school expects of its students!!!! ***

 

[Snow Brite]

I would not hold her back at all! No way. My youngest had a terrible Kindy teacher. She was pregnant at the beginning of the year, had a complication and left after only two weeks with no preparation done. The substitute was FABULOUS! The kind of Kindy teacher you want for your child. Funny, loving, firm, and fun. The kids adored her and learned all their letter and sounds, combos (sh, ph, st), and numbers. Then the regular teacher came back and felt she had to reassert herself. She was strict, mean, and controlling. She did not feel the sub had done a good job, so she started all over again, even though it was freaking February. They never got to reading, forming letters properly when writing, or most of the math beyond simple adding.

I was most upset as my son is very bright and all of his siblings had been reading by Christmas vacation in Kindy. We were also moving schools, so while the 1st grade teachers would be prepared for the incoming class there at that school, he was going to another school where he was going to be considered behind. Over the summer I didn't make a big deal about it, but we did read together a lot. All of a sudden (like it has always happened for my kids) a switch flipped, and he "got it". Now, at the end of First Grade he is reading at an almost 5th grade level when they test him and loves to read! Thats right, in less than a year he went from barely reading to reading at a 4th grade, 8th month level. He understands math better than his classmates and is doing just great. And he is handsome and friendly too. And yes I am biased.

So don't hold her back. Given the right tools, she will catch on really fast if she is bright. Maybe get her those BOB books my kids all loved to practice reading with. Don't forget to talk about it at home all the time. I would stop and say..."Hmmm....What letter do you think B-b-b-b-bananas starts with?" as I hand him a banana for snack.

I would also go talk to the principal and explain your concerns. It is possible that there is a terrific First Grade teacher there at the public school and you just got a dud for Kindy. The NCLB does force schools to work harder to get kids reading and fast, so I am surprised there hasn't been more of an emphasis, but in First Grade for sure.

 

[ntburns22]

Is her school sending home sight words for her to learn? A Kdg. student should recognize 100 sight words before going into 1st grade. You can find these on the internet. These are words your child needs to know by looking at them rather than sounding them out (ie: me, he, she, the, my, that, and, etc.).

***

Thanks for your whole post. Her teacher has never sent anything home. I have even sent in notes asking what I could be working on with her at home. The reply I always got was work on the letter/color of the week. SHe can identify her letters out of order and the sounds she just can't put them together.

Any websites you use would be a great help.

 

[PlutoPony]

Could you get a good K or 1st grade teacher (not necessarily one from her school) to work with her in reading this summer and see how she does? There are a few very good 1st grade teachers in my neighborhood who "tutor" over the summer, especially in reading, and the one on one work can be really helpful to kids who just need a little more time to get started reading. If she doesn't make enough progress by the end of the summer, it will be clear at that point that she just needs another year to mature and holding her back will obviously be the right option....

 

[chris1gill]

Welcome to the public system...

Here's the thing, go with your gut right now... your daughter has only lost a year of academic progress... that trend will continue if you keep her where she is... If she is motivated to learn, I would move her to the private school, and work with her over the summer to prepare her to be challenged...

We let DS go four years in the public system before we pulled him out... those were four lost years... actually, it was worse than just being lost, it taught him he could sit back and coast for the rest of his life... it was the worst dis-service we could do to him...

 

[Hannathy]

Unless you planned on putting her in the private school I wouldn't worry about it. She will be as prepared as all her classmates at her current school. My Son didn't make any progress either in Kind. and went into 1rst not reading and I wasn't thrilled But like others said something clicked and he went up 5 reading levels by Christmas. Could he have been reading earlier probably but what difference would it have made he would have been in the same room doing the same things. He has great comprehension skills which is more important than the rote reading and continues to gain "reading skills" daily. Another thing I go in and read with students every week and most of the kids who entered 1rst reading at higher levels HAVE NOT progressed that much more and alot of the kids including my son have caught up and are all within the same level. Like others have said as long as she has the ground work in place, and is mature enough for 1rst gr. don't sweat until next year.

 

[PlaneJoy1]

Thanks for your whole post. Her teacher has never sent anything home. I have even sent in notes asking what I could be working on with her at home. The reply I always got was work on the letter/color of the week. SHe can identify her letters out of order and the sounds she just can't put them together.

Any websites you use would be a great help.

Get "Teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons" - you can find it on Amazon.com or other book retailers.

It is a very easy to work through book that will get her where she needs to be for 1st grade (especially for the private school you mentioned). You can probably do 2 or 3 lessons in one sitting to begin with since she already knows her letters, and she primarily needs the phonics.

Good luck!

 

[Disneyrsh]

Had my older daughter in a very prestigious private school here in Atlanta, by the end of kindergarten she was not reading at all and they were telling me she needed to repeat kindergarten.

Well, my husband's 6'4", I'm 5'9", and there's no way our daughter's not going to stick out like a sore thumb if she's a year older than everyone else.

However, and more importantly, I strongly felt it was the teacher who was lacking in ability, not my daughter.

We switched over to the best public elementary school in the state (top 10% in the nation, as well), and boy, did she struggle for the first month, trying to catch up.

But catch up she did, and by the time the first graders took the ITBS tests in late october, she nailed them. She's now reading like crazy, on the honor roll, in the gifted class, and happy as a clam at what she can do.

So, my advice is to follow your gut and find a place where she can learn and that fits her better. Her abilities will not be served well by simply repeating the class that failed to teach her anything the first time around.

 

[dizagain]

Another Kindergarten teacher here...

I have taught both public and private kindergarten classes. The public curriculum did not include formal reading beyond blending sounds and sight words. The expectations for first grade included knowing all letters/sounds backwards and forwards and recognizing simple sight words.

My private school curriculum was TOO intense imho and I scaled it down with the director's blessing. Not all 5-6- year-olds are ready to read and there is NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT! In my class we reviewed (the children already knew their letters for the most part upon entering K) the alphabet, stressing the sounds and we spent extra time with the vowels. Then we moved on to blends and simple sight words. We had a set of readers that I went through with very small groups...this was very low-key and I did not pressure the children at all. From February on, I sent a reading folder home with each child that had a level-appropriate book inside. The children read with/to their parents and then returned the folder for a new book. By the end of the year all of these children could read SOME words, but they were not all fluent readers by any means.

Kindergarten is so important for so many reasons that have nothing to do with academics. In my class alone, two children repeated Kindergarten due to social immaturity, not academics - they could both read, add/subtract, etc. It sounds like your daughter will be FINE to me. Speak with the principal and find the right teacher for her and give it a chance! Good luck!

 

[disykat]

I am so glad to see others who don't believe in pushing kindergarten kids. I've seen many bright kids who didn't read in K - my two kids included. I always tell the story about my dh, who didn't read until 3rd grade - but was high school valedictorian, brain bowl champ, etc.

If you are worried that the schools might not be adequate - check out the older grades, junior high, and high school. THAT is where you will be able to tell if the kids are getting what they need.

My kids K teacher was not particularly good. While it was disappointing, I didn't sweat it because I knew that overall my kids were lucky to be in their school/district.

I always sort of roll my eyes when people (not saying anyone here, just in general) brag about how advanced their preschooler or young child is. In my experience, it doesn't necessarily mean they'll be doing well on their SATs.