I Didn't Know Vacations Were So Stressful

[tlprice]

I love the planning process. As I plan, it is like the whole vacation is playing out in my mind. Sometimes I think the planning might be more fun than the actual vacation (Nah!). My sister and I were just talking about how it's nice to have a vacation planned for the future to look forward to.

 

[lbus42]

I see the same thing. I've always said that I am glad I knew nothing about DISboards or any of the other cruise boards before my first cruise, or I'd have been a basket case. Worrying about whether I've gotten the "right" room, dining rotation, serving team. Even if it was the right cruise to take.

I did what research I could using travel books and the DCL website, made our plans and said "OK, here we go". If something unplanned happened, we were prepared to just go with the flow. Often that's how great memories are made.

I think that there have been so many postings that in order to have a perfect vacation that you must get the AHOD and Mickey Bars from room service, you must get a Cabana on CC, you just have to get stateroom XXXX aft (because of the oversized balcony), you must drop off pillowcases at guest services to get signed by the characters, etc.. that some people believe that MUST do or get these things to have a perfect vacation. They then stress if something gets discontinued or they are unable to book something. In the past year DCL discontinued the pillowcase thing. They also dropped the AHOD for a short period of time. There were numerous message threads about how DCL ruined their families vacations. People still ask about the pillowcases and a lot of them seem to be quite upset that they cannot get this done now.

Its Ok to plan a vacation. I do it too, I also realize that I may not be able to do, see, or get everything that I want. Or stuff may happen and I need to be flexible.

 

[tinkerone]

I think your perceived stress of others is stressing you out, lol.

I just don't see or read what your reading. Were people unhappy about not being able to drop things off, yes but I didn't read anyone being stressed out by it. Do people want stateroom XXX, yup but again I don't see the stress. Do people hope/watch/wait for cabanas, again yes but so what? I sometimes read unhappiness, I'll give you that, but I don't read any stress. Let people plan the way they want and don't worry about their disappointment cause it will not do you any good and I think some enjoy the hope that goes with a posting when there could be a solution to their issue such as taking the pillow case to each character to be signed. They may not have known about this if they hadn't posted about their issue. While it may sound like a stressful post its more than likely blowing off steam and waiting to hear what others have done.
JMO

 

[wcw57]

I see what the OP sees. We (meaning us DISers) sometimes create an unrealistic "perfect" picture of what the cruise experience will be IF you only have THIS server at THIS rotation and have THIS type of stateroom and get an early PAT and you carry on your bathing suit....you need a certain lanyard, a separate card for the lights, a PERFECT FE group and PERFECT gifts to give out.....Book EARLY for mixology/whatever or you're gonna miss out.....People are going to hog pool chairs, theater seats, be unkind at dinner, noisy in the halls, pushy on elevators, rude at the buffet....

IF I were a first time cruiser I think I would be intimidated....
There are many time when ignorance is bliss......
One doesn't want to be uninformed, but.......

 

[YayDisney]

I understand what the OP is saying. I too have marveled at times at the level of minute detail of some of the concerns voiced on here. BUT we are all different and our perception of what is "very important" is different. I can't imagine why a cabana is so important, but I am from Florida and it's easy for me to find a quiet beach. Not so much for some people, who have maybe never been to a beach. Plus, as a planner myself, I agree 100% that this is not stress for me and it doesn't really seem like it is for the vast majority of people on here. All of this planning is part of the vacation for me - it adds to the fun. I love learning about all the stuff that is available and am so grateful that this site exists and that I learned about it before my first DCL cruise. We pay a lot of money for these vacations and I think this board and the posters/questions/responses have helped us maximize the value we reap from it. So, there are many things I would never have known about were it not for people on this board asking their questions and the great people that take the time to answer them.

 

[Kuzcotopia1]

I am not talking about those that are planning and researching. I am talking about those who post stuff like they couldn't get the specific cabin they wanted, or they are freaked out because their favorite cruise director is now on a different ship, or something like that.

I'm a planner but I agree 100% with this. My cruise will not be stressful or lacking in fun because I got the wrong waiter or cruise director - I don't even know (or care to look up details on) what a cruise director does. If I'm stuck with a normal sized verandah what's a girl to do? Oh right, drink wine on it.

I see the same thing. I've always said that I am glad I knew nothing about DISboards or any of the other cruise boards before my first cruise, or I'd have been a basket case. Worrying about whether I've gotten the "right" room, dining rotation, serving team. Even if it was the right cruise to take.

I knew about DISboards before my first cruise but I really only used it to plan my arrival and to understand boarding the ship at Port Canaveral. Now I use it to ask random questions about bringing a kid since I didn't have one the first few times I sailed (and ignored all the kid things).

VACAAAAATION!

 

[shh]

I also think it's just the tone of how we write some of our postings - many of us are a melodramatic bunch - and I say that with the utmost love! Most spouses, friends and family have no idea of the work that goes into making a vacation look so "effortless"...they just enjoy the end results and have no desire to know how the sausage was made. So we come on here where we know people will understand us.

We can be a little - emotional shall I say - in how we express our first world problems - I could see that it comes across as more panicked or stressed than the person probably is.

"OMG!!!!! I AM FREAKED OUT... I JUST LOGGED ON AND SAW THIS DISASTER..." along with a million crying, frustrated, angry, freaked out, head hit against the wall emoticons is just another ordinary post on DIS!

It'a all part of the fun - whether I'm on DIS, Cruise Critic or other forums. But I could see where a person new to the boards or someone very understated in the way they write and speak would be a bit surprised by the intensity and assume the person must be in the midst of an anxiety attack.

 

[belac]

Ha! I was also apparently a "bridezilla"

Right there with you on this. Did it all on our own and I learned not to ask opinions quickly. We didnt have the luxury to have family help with either, except the dress and some jewelry.

As far as the vacation planning goes, it not stressful to me to plan, I like it. I get old navigators ect... before. Look up the POC, and choose what we think we would enjoy.

The only stressful part is Online. As far as staying up to get a PAT that works with our schedule and get the excursions we would like, yes that is stressful, not for the way it is done but, for the simple fact that the DCL Website sucks, plain and simple.
They know exactly when the system is busiest, midnight (EST). They should have it running well and be prepared for such. That is what is stressful. Knowing that you have a limited window to actually get what you think you want then spend a couple of hours staring at that wheel turning on your screen, simply put awful.... and their fault. With all technology Disney has they could a have website that is functioning at midnight, or come up with a different system all together.

 

[Club Disney Chandler]

The only stressful part is Online. As far as staying up to get a PAT that works with our schedule and get the excursions we would like, yes that is stressful, not for the way it is done but, for the simple fact that the DCL Website sucks, plain and simple.
They know exactly when the system is busiest, midnight (EST). They should have it running well and be prepared for such. That is what is stressful. Knowing that you have a limited window to actually get what you think you want then spend a couple of hours staring at that wheel turning on your screen, simply put awful.... and their fault. With all technology Disney has they could a have website that is functioning at midnight, or come up with a different system all together.

I think this quote is exactly what the OP is referring to, for me reading this, it completely comes across, to me, like you're cruise is going to suck if you can't get all the reservations you want at midnight. That could be 100% the opposite of what you are saying in your post, but once again, to me, that's how I read it, and I realize that is a me problem not a you problem.

 

[rantnnravin]

Most spouses, friends and family have no idea of the work that goes into making a vacation look so "effortless"...they just enjoy the end results and have no desire to know how the sausage was made.

^This ^
Hello my name is rantnnravin and I am a planaholic...

Every vacation we take is painstakingly stitched together ahead of time. Yes, I choose my stateroom - because I know the floor plans, room sizes, and where i will want to be in relation to other attractions on and off the ship. I choose our port arrival time carefully. I know exactly what we are doing when we get on the ship and I have a basic itinerary grid filled in with pre-booked and probable activities that are then dovetailed with those activities that can only be booked onboard. (And without the careful planning and research, I wouldn't be able to juggle and rearrange on the fly.) I also plan what outfit I am going to wear each night and what pictures I want with that outfit - as well as knowing what my daughter and DBF are bringing so we're all coordinated. And I have even requested a specific dining rotation in order to be in a specific dining room on a certain theme night while wearing that outfit. So what?


Being an introvert, I don't care about knowing or befriending cruise staff, the CD or even our dining team. But I do not begrudge those who feel that those people and their relationships with them enhance their enjoyment of their vacation.

And if I am not able to get what I consider the perfect scenario, I don't sweat it - because I have options for all contingencies. For me, planning is never stressful, in fact it's the opposite. I love puzzles, so getting all the pieces to fit together is like a game. In the end, our resulting vacation is a carefully woven tapestry of (stress-free) memorable moments.

 

[belac]

I think this quote is exactly what the OP is referring to, for me reading this, it completely comes across, to me, like you're cruise is going to suck if you can't get all the reservations you want at midnight. That could be 100% the opposite of what you are saying in your post, but once again, to me, that's how I read it, and I realize that is a me problem not a you problem.

Oh no, not how I meant it. Sorry for confusion, didn't mean the whole cruise would suck at all, to clarify...trying to get what you "think" you may like and get your PAT and you are all excited staying up to midnight, you put in your info and then "BAM" that darn wheel (have a few better choice words for that wheel) OR better yet... Stitch, saying he ate the page. So very frustrating, and I super love Stitch.
That is the most stressful part..... dealing with their website, it sucks, and especially so when your in your all happy mood yea I can book stuff, yea going on vacation euphoria, shot to hell, with a wheel. A bummer Yes, ruin the Vac, no way.

I see that as totally frustrating to have to redo in the AM or on the phone the next day.
It certainly won't ruin the cruise if we didn't get to do "x" or get a super late PAT (don't think we ever made an early PAT in 6 cruises) but it will put a damper on that night for me for sure. That is why after the first 2, I log on with a glass of wine in hand, it helps to say goodnight to Stitch.

 

[Sytrace]

I consider myself a low maintenance kind of planner for myself and family.
Here is what a perfect Disney cruise looks like for my family;
1. Early PAT (but not a deal breaker if we don't get it)
2. Cabin that we like from prior experience or that is in a location we prefer and has a verandah. ( Any size verandah will do) We prefer Starboard but will take a Port if that is all the have in the location we like to be in.
3. Excursions that we find interesting and worth the price. We live in Florida about 45 minutes from the beach so we tend to choose a more educational/cultural excursion than others who may not live near a beach.
4. We use the Navigator to figure out what we want to do and if we do something else, that is okay too. (That comes from being 35 minutes from Disney World with Annual passes)
5. The husband and kids don't bring their phones but I bring mine, turn it off and leave it in the safe for the length of the cruise. (I need to have it in case of transportation issues to and from the port but that is all)
6. I wear a watch only on excursion days and never around the ship.
7. I am actually thinking of NOT booking excursions since it requires us to be awake (like a typical work/school day) and then herded like cattle off the ship at a certain time, onto a bus at a certain time etc. Still pondering this one though...there is a certain comfort level in being herded.
8. Dining together every night as a party of 4. I don't want to sit with other people and make small talk with them. I applaud those who enjoy sitting with other people and are able to talk a blue streak for a couple of hours at a time though. We don't go to Palo or Remy because that would mean that we wouldn't sit with our kids at dinner. (and I don't care for Palo at all and don't like French cuisine)
9. If we are celebrating a birthday or special event, I will purchase amenities to enhance that event.

I plan, but I plan at a level that is specific to knowing my family vacation needs and wants and going at it from there.
I don't stress about anything. (Okay, except for forgetting the passports and ID at home and not realizing it until we pull up to the terminal. But if I check my wallet every few miles we are good to go.

 

[Bree]

Some people are just natural born worry-warts and drama llamas. I have family members like that and I have learned to just ignore it. Now with the invention of the interwebz they can blast their worries and freak outs globally. I would find it tiresome to always be freaking out and worrying about everything, but people are how they are and you can't change them. I swear my MIL makes up crap to be worried about. She's worried because she has nothing to be worried about LOL!!!

I'm just an organized person by nature and because of that it extends to vacationing. I don't plan with complicated spreadsheets or 5 inch thick binders, but I do plan and enjoy it for the most part. I've got a kid with ASD so it matters to us what cabin we have, MDR seating time, MDR private table, what we can do for excursions and our port arrival time. Beyond that I don't give much thought to our days onboard the ship.

 

[BuzzLightyearInTampa]

I'm a believer that one can have a wonderful, magical, fantasy-and-dream-come-true time on a DCL cruise any number of ways. This includes booking lots of shore excursions or booking no shore excursions, booking lots of special dining or booking no special dining, spending lots of extra money on board or spending no extra money on board, and planning every minute of every day or planning nothing and just doing whatever you feel like at the moment. That's one of the great thing about being on a cruise. You are all on the same ship, but no two people are having the exact same experience. In the end, it's your cruise and you are the one responsible for enjoying yourself.

 

[Ofinn]

Ive booked all of our cruises less than 3 months out. Ive never chosen my room, server, dining rotation, or booked an excursion. Ive always had a great time. I get what OP is saying. I find a lot of people on here a little obsessive about their planning. I think booking a cruise a month out would stress a out a lot of people out on these boards because the couldnt obsessively plan every detail for a year. To each his own were all different. I like spontenaity. I think waiting a year to take a trip would stress me out. I dont like to think about it until I have the money, and Im ready to go.

 

[JustCallMeMommy]

I'm a planner, and it makes me happy. While I can't imagine requesting a particular server, I find that the process of planning the details stretches my vacation. The room picking makes sense as you typically choose your stateroom when booking. I think most people who aren't using a travel agent spend at least some time looking at deck plans and trying to decide what category of room to book.

I booked the only cruise we have been on pretty last minute, but even then, I wanted more stuff to plan! Once we picked a room and booked excursions, there was little else to do.

 

[Club Disney Chandler]

Oh no, not how I meant it. Sorry for confusion, didn't mean the whole cruise would suck at all, to clarify...trying to get what you "think" you may like and get your PAT and you are all excited staying up to midnight, you put in your info and then "BAM" that darn wheel (have a few better choice words for that wheel) OR better yet... Stitch, saying he ate the page. So very frustrating, and I super love Stitch.
That is the most stressful part..... dealing with their website, it sucks, and especially so when your in your all happy mood yea I can book stuff, yea going on vacation euphoria, shot to hell, with a wheel. A bummer Yes, ruin the Vac, no way.

I see that as totally frustrating to have to redo in the AM or on the phone the next day.
It certainly won't ruin the cruise if we didn't get to do "x" or get a super late PAT (don't think we ever made an early PAT in 6 cruises) but it will put a damper on that night for me for sure. That is why after the first 2, I log on with a glass of wine in hand, it helps to say goodnight to Stitch.

Everything is better with a glass of wine in hand!

 

[mommy2allyandaveri]

Not everyone that obsesses over their vacation planning is actually stressed about it. Some enjoy the process of researching all the little details as they count down the time until their vacation begins - I know that I do! I am also willing to do a little more work on the front end if it increases the enjoyment or experience when the vacation actually comes - nothing wrong with that! I do agree that even with minimal planning people can have a great time but sometimes people come back upset that they missed something that a quick bit of research could have avoided. I do agree though to not strive for total perfection - nothing is ever so but that's okay too!

Aby

This! For me the constant researching and reading just adds to the anticipation and excitement of the trip. I love, love, love it and it doesn't stress me out in the least.

 

[lbus42]

I also think it's just the tone of how we write some of our postings - many of us are a melodramatic bunch - and I say that with the utmost love! Most spouses, friends and family have no idea of the work that goes into making a vacation look so "effortless"...they just enjoy the end results and have no desire to know how the sausage was made. So we come on here where we know people will understand us.

We can be a little - emotional shall I say - in how we express our first world problems - I could see that it comes across as more panicked or stressed than the person probably is.

"OMG!!!!! I AM FREAKED OUT... I JUST LOGGED ON AND SAW THIS DISASTER..." along with a million crying, frustrated, angry, freaked out, head hit against the wall emoticons is just another ordinary post on DIS!

It'a all part of the fun - whether I'm on DIS, Cruise Critic or other forums. But I could see where a person new to the boards or someone very understated in the way they write and speak would be a bit surprised by the intensity and assume the person must be in the midst of an anxiety attack.

You hit the nail on the head. That is exactly what I was talking about, especially with your "OMG!!!! I AM FREAKED OUT" bit. Thanks for helping to clarify what I have been trying to get accross.

 

[RedSox68]

Planning ahead is what provides the relaxing atmosphere once on board. What appears to be a seamless string of entertainment, activities, and R & R is due to the careful orchestration ahead of time.

Yes, THAT. My obsessive pre-cruise planning is actually fun for me (like a hobby), and a great stress reliever because once we head out for our trip, I know that everything is in place and done.