I called the cops, would you have

[Hannathy]

A little girl who is 8 or 9? I would have opened the door to make sure she was all right! So, no. I don't think you did the right thing.

ETA: It's really sad that some of us are so fearful that they see the boogieman everywhere ... even in the body of a 8 year old girl.

I agree.

I certainly would have opened the door enough to find out what in the heck was going on.

If someone was chasing her and grabbed her while I was waiting on the police-can be 30 minutes or more in a non-emergency call, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

we can't afford to have enough police to handle all the things that could be dealt with by any adult. Real crimes or people who really needed help have to wait while they are on calls like this.

I hope if my kids ever need help someone wouldn't be so callous to ignore them.

 

[robinb]

I merely stated kids have been used as bait. You can wager bets all day long. It doesn't dispute the fact it has happened. What you choose to do with that fact is your determination to make. For better or worse, reading about crimes of this nature (crimes against Samaritans) does impact people.

I don't fault the OP for being cautious. IMO, the extreme you suggest about not going to work is not analogous to being startled at one's home.

Asking questions through the door would have been a good starting point. The OP was startled and fearful. She was wondering if she handled it right.

Good grief.

Good grief indeed! Name ONE case in recent history in the US where a child was used as "bait". I think you are pulling examples out thin air to support your paranoid position.

 

[Magpie]

I merely stated kids have been used as bait. You can wager bets all day long. It doesn't dispute the fact it has happened. What you choose to do with that fact is your determination to make. For better or worse, reading about crimes of this nature (crimes against Samaritans) does impact people.

I don't fault the OP for being cautious. IMO, the extreme you suggest about not going to work is not analogous to being startled at one's home.

Asking questions through the door would have been a good starting point. The OP was startled and fearful. She was wondering if she handled it right.

Good grief.

Do you happen to know when and where kids have been used as bait? We know it happens in Chile because a previous poster said she knows two people it happened to personally.

But I've been searching online and I can't find anything like this for Canada or the US. I did find plenty of grownups fraudulently asking for help, though. Snopes has a good list...

http://www.snopes.com/crime/prevent/doorpound.asp

Personally, I live in a place where people don't lock their doors. More than once I've been canvassing, gone to knock on a door and had it swing open under my hand, so I'm sticking my head in and shouting "HELLO? ANYONE HOME?" Once someone even left a kit for me to pick up on their inside table! That kind of crossed my comfort zone, a bit. I didn't like having to take something out of someone's house when they weren't there, even though they'd told me to do it.

But I can see where "talking through the closed door" would be good advice if you live somewhere else.

FWIW, I think the wealthier neighbourhoods around here do have more security measures in place. We live in a more working class neighbourhood, with not so much to steal.

 

[BCDisneyFanatic]

If you've personally known TWO people who have fallen for a "child asking for help at the door" scenario, then Chile is a LOT more dangerous than most of Canada. Because I can tell you I've never heard of such a thing in all my time living here. It just doesn't happen.

That's why I assumed Chile was closer to Pakistan. Because the "child asking for help at the door" scenario leading to people getting tied up would be all over the news here, coast to coast. It would be that shocking!

That said, there are definitely parts of Toronto that I'm happy not to have to live in.

Well, part of it is that the ex-pat community in Chile (and likely most countries) is targeted more frequently than other groups. Also, my kids go to a very expensive school (which, trust me, we couldn't afford if DH's company wasn't paying for it ) so the population I associate with is at a greater risk than average because of their economic status. These incidents did make the national news here, and it was considered 'shocking'.

Caution and clear-thinking are important in any crisis. I think the OP should have talked to the child through the door to try to find out what was going on, but I think calling the police was a also reasonable action under the circumstances.

 

[DVCisME]

Hi! OP here. I did indeed talk to the girl through the door. I asked what she wanted, and told her I did not know her. Also why she was jumping up at the window of the door she had a weird grin on.

I did the right thing. If the girl need help or if something was not right the police would need to be called anyway.
Also the neighbor's house she said she going to looks nothing like me and she clearly saw me.

Thanks to everyone for their input.

 

[Magpie]

Well, part of it is that the ex-pat community in Chile (and likely most countries) is targeted more frequently than other groups. Also, my kids go to a very expensive school (which, trust me, we couldn't afford if DH's company wasn't paying for it ) so the population I associate with is at a greater risk than average because of their economic status. These incidents did make the national news here, and it was considered 'shocking'.

Caution and clear-thinking are important in any crisis. I think the OP should have talked to the child through the door to try to find out what was going on, but I think calling the police was a also reasonable action under the circumstances.

I agree with you 100%. Calling the police was completely reasonable.

Here's a case where a young child was persistently knocking on strangers' doors in Winnipeg, only to get repeatedly returned to his parent's custody. Thank goodness the last neighbour he approached took him in and noticed he had a broken arm!

http://www.winnipegfreepress.com/op...ky-he-wasnt-neglected-to-death-103509324.html

 

[DaParkers]

I merely stated kids have been used as bait. You can wager bets all day long. It doesn't dispute the fact it has happened. What you choose to do with that fact is your determination to make. For better or worse, reading about crimes of this nature (crimes against Samaritans) does impact people.

I don't fault the OP for being cautious. IMO, the extreme you suggest about not going to work is not analogous to being startled at one's home.

Asking questions through the door would have been a good starting point. The OP was startled and fearful. She was wondering if she handled it right.

Good grief.

And I merely stated that it doesn't happen often. And, reading about ANY crime impacts people, not just the one you're trying to make a point about. Now, tell me where I faulted the OP for being timorous. Read my first post in this thread. Having a contrasting viewpoint does not mean I was attacking the OP. I understand that part of my assessment of the situation is due to the fact that I a man and she was a woman at home alone.
Good grief.

 

[torinsmom]

Two cases of children being used as "bait". These were on the first page of a google search. It may not be that common, but it does happen. I still say if the child was not in distress, opening the door would not really accomplish anything. By her talking to another person, she was not alone.


http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/108416/toddler_used_as_bait_in

http://abclocal.go.com/ktrk/story?section=news/local&id=7332268

 

[Magpie]

Two cases of children being used as "bait". These were on the first page of a google search. It may not be that common, but it does happen. I still say if the child was not in distress, opening the door would not really accomplish anything. By her talking to another person, she was not alone.


http://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/108416/toddler_used_as_bait_in

http://abclocal.go.com/ktrk/story?section=news/local&id=7332268

Interesting! And I'm sure glad I don't live in Texas - it sounds rough!

My Google is set up to show Canadian links first. I got child safe bait for fishing, an abusive mom feeding her child cockroach bait (oddly enough from South Africa), and this photo titled "Falconry - Child Bait!":

OTOH, from what the OP described (the child not appearing in distress, talking to someone outside, grinning through the windows), and the fact that she DID talk to the child. I think she handled things okay. Certainly I understand why she acted that way!

On the other hand, I can kind of see the officer's perspective. Here they've got a goofball kid and a freaked neighbour and no crisis they can see. So I can see the officer being a bit snippy about it, and thinking that this could probably have been sorted out without involving the cops.

The kid may have some kind of hidden disability - low IQ, hyperactivity, autism spectrum, etc...

I think the OP should get to meet all her neighbours and their kids, so she can recognize them on sight. Maybe an open house neighbourhood BBQ is in order?

 

[Liberty Belle]

I would have thought the poor child was in trouble and would have opened my door.

I suppose it could have been a ploy to get me to open my door and there could have been an adult with her who was wanting to break in to my home, but I answer my door when someone knocks on it, so what's the difference. I'd never forgive myself if a child was in danger and I didn't do something to help her.

That's just me. I don't think it was wrong of you to call the police.

 

[RitaZ.]

I live in a city that either is or is always close to having the highest murder rate in America and I still would have tried to help. You don't have to open the door to ask "Are you ok" or "What do you want"? In the U.S., there is a very small chance of that little girl being used to commit a crime. What if it was your child that was possibly in danger? I'm sorry to those that disagree, but I believe in helping if I can, especially children.

I see where you're coming from. My husband would have done the same thing. One time he gave a ride to a salesman that came to our door. It began to storm and the guy had parked his car in the next street. So, DH offered the man a ride to his car. I thought DH was insane for doing so, but he was totally comfortable with the situation.

The way we react to a situation has a lot to do with our perceptions.

 

[Green Tea]

Honestly, if there was a little girl throwing herself at my door i would probably have opened the door to be sure she was all right. My first thought would have been that she was fleeing from somebody.

me too

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

I would have thought the poor child was in trouble and would have opened my door.

I suppose it could have been a ploy to get me to open my door and there could have been an adult with her who was wanting to break in to my home, but I answer my door when someone knocks on it, so what's the difference. I'd never forgive myself if a child was in danger and I didn't do something to help her.

That's just me. I don't think it was wrong of you to call the police.

Ditto

 

[jodifla]

Call the police? Over an 8 year old? No way!

I would have done the adult thing, which is to open the door, and try to help the child.

No wonder the police acted the way they did.

You are now "that" neighbor.

 

[MichelleVW]

Interesting! And I'm sure glad I don't live in Texas - it sounds rough!

I live in Texas...it's not rough where I live...

 

[clh2]

I hate to jump into an even somewhat controversial theard. I have called the police for far less than what the OP described. And...oddly enough...DH was out of town both times.

One time - Boy Scouts were "supposedly" selling wreaths door to door. At 9:30 at night. While I realize they were wearing winter coats...I didn't see any Boy Scout apparel or insignia. And, they were not with any adults. I don't know - this just seems like they stole a wreath from someone's house and were trying to get money for it. If it would have been earlier in the day, they would have realized we already have a wreath. The most disturbing thing about this...Boy Scouts take orders in September or October for wreaths - it generally isn't a door-to-door selling function.

To the OP - I would have called the police too!

 

[DaParkers]

You are now "that" neighbor.

 

[EMom]

I live in Texas...it's not rough where I live...

Most of Katy (where the TX home invasion took place) is fairly upscale, so I'd guess the criminals targeted their victims wisely.

As for the OP, she's just moved in and doesn't know the neighbors. Her DH isn't home. Some strange kid is throwing herself against the door, demanding to be let in, all the while telling (what is assumed to be) and adult nearby that the OP won't let her in. So the child is not alone, but is in the care of someone else. Someone else who thinks it's perfectly okay to throw yourself against a door and demand entry.

Seriously, "bait" would have entered my head and I'd have called the police. This didn't scream "child in danger" to me. It would have made ME feel more in danger than the kid. I say follow your instincts. You have them for a very good reason. So what if someone thinks you're "that neighbor"? I'd be that neighbor too if some kid (with what seemed to be an adult nearby) was slamming against my door demanding I let them in. That's just STRANGE and strange makes me uneasy.

Goodness knows I have helped dozens of lost kids/kids in need over the years, but this would have set off my radar.

 

[Magpie]

I live in Texas...it's not rough where I live...

So you're not worried about little girls knocking on your door, in order to stage a home invasion?

I really worry about the kind of mindset that sees every person at our door - even a child - as a threat. It reminds me too much of the kind of thinking that led to an acquittal in the case of the Japanese exchange student, shot by a man in Louisiana. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yoshihiro_Hattori)

I don't want to live that way, and if I ever thought my town was heading down that track, I'd move.

 

[Mimi1965]

I think the OP should have spoken to the kid thru the door, before calling the police