I am totally and utterly depressed *Update 4/4/10*

[Pooh_Friend#1]

I wish their was something I could do for you. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[snapppyd]

Hope they are alright today. I know she is busy, but I hope she checks in here soon.

 

[Jennasis]

Oh dear...Jen we all hope you're doing ok today!! Please post a quick something when you can. I'm worried about you.

 

[Jenvenza]

Hey guys! Sorry it took a while to post. When I got home last night, my husband left pretty quickly, so there wasnt any time to say anything. I played with G all night and got her to bed. I had insomnia, but finally fell asleep. My husband was home when I got up this morning, so it seems nothing got accomplished. I did speak with my parents again and they said they can have someone come move me and all of my stuff out anytime I want them to.

I seriously didnt speak to my husband at all yesterday or this morning. I got ready for work and G didnt want me to leave again, so it was another rough morning. Even though my husband and I arent fighting at all in front of her, she seems to know something is wrong. She never wants me to go to work, but she never cries two days in a row when I do.

I was all ready to confront him last night. Maybe he sensed it. I dont know. Today I feel better though. I feel better about my decision. But I have another long day before I can go home and talk to him again.

 

[glitterkittyy]

Hey guys! Sorry it took a while to post. When I got home last night, my husband left pretty quickly, so there wasnt any time to say anything. I played with G all night and got her to bed. I had insomnia, but finally fell asleep. My husband was home when I got up this morning, so it seems nothing got accomplished. I did speak with my parents again and they said they can have someone come move me and all of my stuff out anytime I want them to.

I seriously didnt speak to my husband at all yesterday or this morning. I got ready for work and G didnt want me to leave again, so it was another rough morning. Even though my husband and I arent fighting at all in front of her, she seems to know something is wrong. She never wants me to go to work, but she never cries two days in a row when I do.

I was all ready to confront him last night. Maybe he sensed it. I dont know. Today I feel better though. I feel better about my decision. But I have another long day before I can go home and talk to him again.

I'm glad you're okay. I don't know about anyone else, but I'm worried about your baby girl. I hope that her crying and not wanting you to leave is because she senses something wrong and not because she dreads staying home with daddy. I'm not saying he's doing anything wrong, but it troubles me just the same. It's my nature to worry though. Anyway, thank you for checking and letting us know what's going on.

 

[chisnpeke]

Hey guys! Sorry it took a while to post. When I got home last night, my husband left pretty quickly, so there wasnt any time to say anything. I played with G all night and got her to bed. I had insomnia, but finally fell asleep. My husband was home when I got up this morning, so it seems nothing got accomplished. I did speak with my parents again and they said they can have someone come move me and all of my stuff out anytime I want them to.

I seriously didnt speak to my husband at all yesterday or this morning. I got ready for work and G didnt want me to leave again, so it was another rough morning. Even though my husband and I arent fighting at all in front of her, she seems to know something is wrong. She never wants me to go to work, but she never cries two days in a row when I do.

I was all ready to confront him last night. Maybe he sensed it. I dont know. Today I feel better though. I feel better about my decision. But I have another long day before I can go home and talk to him again.

The fact that your daughter is crying two days in a row for you not to go is somewhat concerning. I know you said your husband loves your little girl but are you sure he is capable of taking care of her? The crying would set off red flags for me that something he is doing is off.

 

[Poohgirl]

The fact that your daughter is crying two days in a row for you not to go is somewhat concerning. I know you said your husband loves your little girl but are you sure he is capable of taking care of her? The crying would set off red flags for me that something he is doing is off.

I third this...continued

 

[ols386]

The fact that your daughter is crying two days in a row for you not to go is somewhat concerning. I know you said your husband loves your little girl but are you sure he is capable of taking care of her? The crying would set off red flags for me that something he is doing is off.

That's a pretty big assumption to make.

I think children can sense alot of things that we adults don't realize they can, and I bet the little girl does sense that things aren't right between her mom and dad, but to insinuate that he is doing something wrong where the child is concerned, is taking a pretty big leap.

 

[claudia]

The fact that your daughter is crying two days in a row for you not to go is somewhat concerning. I know you said your husband loves your little girl but are you sure he is capable of taking care of her? The crying would set off red flags for me that something he is doing is off.

I third this...continued

red flags here too....

 

[Jenvenza]

I am not very worried about him watching her, but I can understand your concerns. By the time I get home she is in a great mood and tells me all about her day and everything she did with daddy. They really are wonderful together, and that makes this harder as well. He has always been good at watching her when he isnt working - he just isnt good at doing anything else there. Like keeping up with the house.

I had calmed her down before I left and made sure she was happy and not crying. So I was a little late for work! But there were some tears and her clinging on to my leg for a while. And I am not one who can just say, sorry, I have to go! And leave while she is upset. It breaks my heart to see her upset.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Uggh, this thread is upsetting to me. I have to walk away.

Good luck OP, I'll be praying for your DD.

 

[glitterkittyy]

I am not very worried about him watching her, but I can understand your concerns. By the time I get home she is in a great mood and tells me all about her day and everything she did with daddy. They really are wonderful together, and that makes this harder as well. He has always been good at watching her when he isnt working - he just isnt good at doing anything else there. Like keeping up with the house.

I had calmed her down before I left and made sure she was happy and not crying. So I was a little late for work! But there were some tears and her clinging on to my leg for a while. And I am not one who can just say, sorry, I have to go! And leave while she is upset. It breaks my heart to see her upset.

That's good to know, and I get that. My daughter doesn't like to see me go to work either, and she's nearly 10. lol It's not that she doesn't like her dad watching her. She'd just prefer for me to be there too.

Just please keep asking your DD how her day went so you can make sure there aren't any issues that come up. Yes, I'm still worried. lol

 

[claudia]

That's a pretty big assumption to make.

I think children can sense alot of things that we adults don't realize they can, and I bet the little girl does sense that things aren't right between her mom and dad, but to insinuate that he is doing something wrong where the child is concerned, is taking a pretty big leap.

don't think it is a leap at all since he just flung a sippy cup at mom. he is not taking his meds and for anyone who is familiar with bi-polar that can be a big problem. his behavior may be strange to his daughter and that is what is upsetting her.

 

[Jenvenza]

Uggh, this thread is turning my stomach. I have to walk away.

Why?

 

[Jenvenza]

That's good to know, and I get that. My daughter doesn't like to see me go to work either, and she's nearly 10. lol It's not that she doesn't like her dad watching her. She'd just prefer for me to be there too.

Just please keep asking your DD how her day went so you can make sure there aren't any issues that come up. Yes, I'm still worried. lol

I know you are worried! I think a lot of people are right now! But even my family knows how much he loves our DD and how much she loves him.

And she has done the same thing to my husband before when he used to work at night. She would cry when he would leave and I would be there. I think she just wants us both there at the same time!

 

[ols386]

I am not very worried about him watching her, but I can understand your concerns. By the time I get home she is in a great mood and tells me all about her day and everything she did with daddy. They really are wonderful together, and that makes this harder as well. He has always been good at watching her when he isnt working - he just isnt good at doing anything else there. Like keeping up with the house.

I had calmed her down before I left and made sure she was happy and not crying. So I was a little late for work! But there were some tears and her clinging on to my leg for a while. And I am not one who can just say, sorry, I have to go! And leave while she is upset. It breaks my heart to see her upset.

Well, you are a great Mom. Very loving and concerned.

 

[glitterkittyy]

I know you are worried! I think a lot of people are right now! But even my family knows how much he loves our DD and how much she loves him.

And she has done the same thing to my husband before when he used to work at night. She would cry when he would leave and I would be there. I think she just wants us both there at the same time!

It's also common at her age so I should stop worrying, I suppose. But I know I won't.

I also know you'll keep a watchful eye on her for any signs that you need to be concerned.

 

[Jenvenza]

It's also common at her age so I should stop worrying, I suppose. But I know I won't.

I also know you'll keep a watchful eye on her for any signs that you need to be concerned.

I worry about everything, so I understand!

She tells me everything! Her great-grandma came over last week to watch her for a few hours. This is my husband's grandmother. i dont care for her all that much, but she loves our daughter. When I got home, G told me "Grandma fell asleep!" I asked her what she did and she said "I woke her up!" She has also been known to tell you your birthday presents ahead of time if she has seen them! She is only 2.5, but she can communicate really well.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Why?

Because love alone does not make a good or safe parent. Children should not cry to the point of requiring assistance at the idea of one parent leaving them in the care of the other parent. It's just not right, something is wrong. Your DD is trying to tell you something in the only way she knows how. She can't articulate trouble, and even if she could she probably would not want to betray her Dad, and this is her Dad we are talking about, not a Grandparent. ALL kids want to protect their parents and at that age they are incapable of distinguishing good from bad, they accept everything just as it is. You just have to read the behavior in a child that young and her behavior is plainly not right.

I'm being honest, your story is very disturbing to me, the only good thing you say about him is that he loves her and she loves him, but those are just words. Nothing else you say even remotely resembles a loving situation.

 

[glitterkittyy]

I worry about everything, so I understand!

She tells me everything! Her great-grandma came over last week to watch her for a few hours. This is my husband's grandmother. i dont care for her all that much, but she loves our daughter. When I got home, G told me "Grandma fell asleep!" I asked her what she did and she said "I woke her up!" She has also been known to tell you your birthday presents ahead of time if she has seen them! She is only 2.5, but she can communicate really well.

My worrying nature is a gift from my mother. She used to worry about the dumbest thing like if the braclet she was wearing would somehow get caught on the bus driving down the road. <--She seriously worried about that!

I'm glad you had some time to come to terms with your decision. Your posts show that you are more at ease today, and I am happy to see that.