I am so angry - need your opinions !!!

[wils]

This just isn't right - what (in the school's opinion) should your DS have done in that situation?!

I'm sorry but I think you have to take this further.

Thinking of you

 

[Snowy-girls]

Jackie,how terrible for Lewis .I hope his neck is not as sore today.x.

 

[Cyrano]

Jackie, given your employment status at the school, you've been put in a very difficult position, but I do think you need to have a conversation with the Head Teacher about what appears to be an overly-zealous interpretation of school policy by an individual teacher. There's a clear distinction between fighting and self-defence. What's the school's stance, for example, were an adult to pin your son to the ground? Do they still advocate non-retaliation? It's human nature, not to mention good sense, to defend ourselves against attack and I don't think any school should have the right to teach otherwise.

This would be my thoughts also.

Given the potential conflict I would say to the head teacher that you do find this uncomfortable. Therefore as a parent you should raise this with the local education office.
Good luck in getting a resolution in Lewis's favour

 

[gilld]

Perhaps you should speak to the Chairman of Govenors, but tell the Head why you are going above her - because of the conflict with your job.

 

[cap'njack.]

Hi Jackie

Sorry to hear about Lewis.

Personally I would go back to the teacher initially and speak to her about the incident and see if she actually had the full facts before making her decision to punish Lewis as well.

I agree that maybe, due to your conflict of interests, this actually needs to go higher than the Headteacher...I've not got school age kiddies so I don't know who it would be though.

 

[BRobson]

I have had a horrible morning

Lewis was sobbing in the line because he didnt want to stay in at lunchtime

Thought I would speak to the teacher first and tell her what Lewis had told me about what had happened. She was told in class by the boy that attacked Lewis that he had beat him with a stick first. I know my son and I know this is not true. SHe has said she will ask some of the other kids but Lewis did pick up a stick so he will be punished

I am off to work now so will let you know the developments later

Thanks for all your support guys xx

 

[Booknut]

Sorry your son had to go through this. I think its totally out of order that they gave them both the same punishment. Bullying seems such a huge problem in this country, why don't the schools do anything about it? I keep hearing about initiatives etc on bullying but stories I hear from people are that it is still a huge problem. Just sad really. If they were two adults the police would be involved but because its two kids nothing really major happens, that really makes me

If this is what school is like here i'm moving back to Canada or homeschooling

 

[Chilly]

I hope you get it sorted out soon

 

[PoppyAnna]

I've only just seen this thread Jackie.

Firsly, I'm so sorry this has happened to your son the injuries look awful and it's clear he was being attacked and defended himself the best he could, attack comes "naturally" to an agressive out of control child, self defence comes naturally to any normal child.

I don't think you have a conflict of interests, I think you are a parent first and regardless of your position in the school if you keep a professional attitude towards your child (which it sounds like you do) whilst at work, other staff, including the Head Teacher should do so to, the Head duty of care is to protect the children.

This happened to my DD last year in year one and the child's older sibling actually came running down the playground to pull her own sister off my DD along with some other children, this also happened around the corner, slightly out of sight. When I was first told I asked if my DD retaliated and I was told that they didn't know for sure but they didn't think so (it wasn't important to the teachers and Head, my DD had been pinned to the ground for an insignificant reason and that was all they were interested in). The "other child" was made to apologise face to face and by drawing a picture saying sorry to my DD as well as being punished by losing her "golden time" in class for the rest of the week.
I was happy with the punishment given, I would have been livid if my DD had been equally punished.

to you Jackie, it must be hard, especially with DH away.

I must say I have previously taken issue (due to equal ops) knowing that my Head has an unofficial policy not to employ parents in the small school that my DD attends. I'm sure now it's because of incidents like this so that *she* doesn't feel awkward when punishing children. Your head may feel the he/she has to punish your son so that it doesn't look like your child is getting special treatment due to you being a member of staff - if that makes sense

 

[tennisfan]

I hope this get resolved soon Jackie & I hope Lewis feels better too

I think the teacher acted in a rash way, self defence was needed & she is punishing him for it.

 

[Joanne UK]

Sounds like your school has the same lily-livered approach to discipline as ours. Happy to unsuitably punish those that don't really deserve it because they want to appear as though they won't tolerate bad behaviour, but failing miserably when it comes to punishing the main and perpetual offenders.

Was the punishment the same for your son and the other boy?

 

[Lizzy Lemon]

I had this a lot at school. My youngest DS is a black belt karate and you would think he could stick up for himself. Not so, he had some trouble at his junior school. He was in a special needs unit where his problems were mainly speech but some of his peers had behavioural problems and while I tried to make him understand some things they did to him were not personal but just the way they behaved his teacher would tell him he was in no way to use any defensive moves as it was their job to intervene and stop any trouble. The trouble is they didn't see everything. He often got hurt and I told him to defend himself, we were expected to allow anything to happen to him without him looking out for himself, I don't think so. Its taken a lot to make him look after himself and one day when he came home from mainstream senior school where someone had taken a swipe at him he'd kicked them where it hurts and this child approached him the next day and said hello to him. Sometimes you just have to hit back at a bully regardless of the school policy.

 

[Ware Bears]

Sorry I missed this Jackie, loads of for both you and Lewis.

 

[mandymouse]

How has school been for you both the last couple of days Jackie ? I hope it's been OK

 

[A Small World]

Just caught up with this. Hope you are ok and Lewis as well - its not a nice situation to be in

 

[buzz for boys]

only just seen this.
I hope you have it resolved and that Lewis is on th mend - for what its worth im shocked at the schools approach to this.
Hugs to you all x x x

 

[BRobson]

Sorry being late in updating - tbh I am washed out with DH being away

In the end the teacher withdrew Lewis punishment as she spoke to some other kids and a clearer picture was painted.

The other boy was punished and his mother told

The boy appoligised to Lewis and Lewis is happy so rightly or wrongly am going to leave it at that

All my colleagues in the playground are watching now

 

[A Small World]

Glad the teacher saw sense

Hugs to you all

 

[Ware Bears]

Glad it's now resolved but it's a shame the teacher didn't speak to the other children first.

for you, hope you can sleep better tonight.

 

[PoppyAnna]

Sorry being late in updating - tbh I am washed out with DH being away

In the end the teacher withdrew Lewis punishment as she spoke to some other kids and a clearer picture was painted.

The other boy was punished and his mother told

The boy appoligised to Lewis and Lewis is happy so rightly or wrongly am going to leave it at that

All my colleagues in the playground are watching now

I'm glad to hear you're much more settled about it now Jackie