How old is too old (regarding restrooms and kids)?

[luvsJack]

What about, if both adults have a cell, just hand him one of the cells and stand outside the bathroom door. That way he can yell and be heard or just push a button and call your phone (that ring would be a signal that there is a problem)?

Too, I don't know about the men's room but every ladies' room I have been in at wdw usually had a CM in there or close by cleaning; so that would give another level of protection for him.

 

[MouseLover]

I would have him use the companion restrooms.

My daughter & I have both been "peeked at" by boys in the ladies' restroom several times at various places. It makes me uncomfortable for them to be in there. One boy actually crawled on his hands and knees going from stall to stall peeking under.

Have you asked the boy what he would prefer?

 

[momofrrr]

As the mom of two teenage girls...NO, I don't really want a 10 year old boy in the bathroom with them whether I am with them or not. I don't think it is appropriate.

 

[averysmom]

10 is too old. My ds is 7, and I don't take him into the ladies anymore if I can help it. If there is no family washroom available, then he uses the single stall companion washroom.

 

[MouseLover]

about the 2 cell phones.

There usually are restroom attendants at WDW (at least in the ladies room). I had forgotten that.

 

[Zeebs]

I am sorry to those who were victims of crime or abuse. It *does* happen. However, it doesn't happen every time a child uses the restroom and is more likely to happen in secret - by someone that you know - than in a public place - like a theme park restroom filled with dads.

The chances of this happening to your son are very, very small. Lots of boys, lots of decent men in the parks and restrooms, statistically very few perverts, and the odds are so slim of this happening. I believe we have become a paranoid society when we stop letting our older boys even use the restroom on their own.

Your child's risk of being molested in the bathroom at WDW is very small. The fact that you expose women and girls to a violation of their own privacy is 100%. Find a family/companion restroom; find a dad to take your kid into the men's; wait outside the door; empower your kid to yell "don't touch me" or "I need help" - there are all kinds of things moms can do to minimize the already-minuscule chance of molestation.

I work in this sector - prosecuting child sex abuse among other felonies - and even I think that dragging older boys into the ladies room is ridiculous and over-the-top paranoid.

As a victim of such abuse (by someone we knew) I refuse to let my children grow up in a paranoid state that everyone out there is out to get you. We will take precautions, they will be taught stranger danger etc I hope to have an open relationship with them, empowering them, and we have a no secrets policy because there should be nothing you can't tell your parents about.


Standing outside a mens room, loudly stating to your child that you are waiting and to get a move on would ensure that no body touchs your child.

People seem to forget that sex offenders aren't normally stupid they are cunning, manipulative people looking for the right opportunity. And grabbing someone in a Disney bathroom, where I would be very surprised no one is waiting outside or someone inside doesn't do something isn't very smart.

Can anyone show me a record of a child being molested while in a Disney Park bathroom?

I have stated before it doesn't bother me if a boy is in the bathroom but blimey if I catch him looking under the door, I will certainly have something to say to him and his parent. My almost 2 year old gets growled at for doing that and he is just interested in the gap between the door.

Kirsten

 

[PaddingtonBear]

We have a whole generation of young adults who have never come to realize that the world doesn't revolve around them and their feelings. I blame the whole "I'm Okay, You're Okay" movement of the 70's. We spent a lot of time building up self esteem in the children of the 70's and 80's- The term "Me Generation" didn't just happen.

Hypocritical, much? When your "parenting" your child the way you want controvenes social norms and invades the privacy of those around you, then you- not the people you've made uncomfortable- are the entitled obnoxious one.

A tween girl made uncomfortable by seeing a boy her own age in the bathroom does not need therapy. No FEMALE should be made uncomfortable by MALES in the FEMALE ONLY bathroom.

In my opinion 10 is too old for the women's room. In addition, the recent instances of molestation at WDW were all out in the open, in very wide-open public place, not in the close confines of the restrooms. Its interesting that there's all this paranoia about bathrooms when molestation is so unlikely to happen there, surrounded by dads and other adults.

 

[jaminmd]

Not to add fuel to this fire....but I think that everyone here should be aware that boys (yes even 10 year olds) are often preyed upon by sick men in public restrooms. This is not typically an issue with young girls in women's public restrooms. Theme parks are locations where these sick men would know that they could find or target young boys. I have an 8 year old and a 5 year old boy and I am very conscious about this! Read James Dobson's Bringing Up Boys and you will understand some the statistics here...we must protect our children!!!!! Having said that, I will say that they usually go in with their dad into the Men's room...However, if they are with me (and dad is not along) and there's no family restroom....I take them with me in the women's. Luckily, when this has occurred the restrooms have been empty (at the mall, etc....we've never faced this at Disney) However if I were a single mom or put in a situation where I had no other choice, I would die if another young girl yelled out..."there's a boy in here...." or something like that in front of my two boys...that is just teaching a child to be rude!!!!!! We are very careful to consider others and I teach my boys this....I just wish others would do the same!!!!

It is NOT being rude. My daughter deserves her privacy when she uses the restroom! I certainly wouldn't send her into the mens room to use a stall while your sons are at the urinals! That remark is ridiculous!

We all want to protect our children but you have to cut the cord at some point. We do our children a disservice when we don't teach them about dangerous situations & allow them to develop the skills they need to recognize them.

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

Now here is a question:

what does Flordia law say about men (or boys) using a womens restroom?

or is there any law concerning it.

I would think a "peeping tom" law MIGHT apply.

 

[MSSANDRA]

It is NOT being rude. My daughter deserves her privacy when she uses the restroom! I certainly wouldn't send her into the mens room to use a stall while your sons are at the urinals! That remark is ridiculous!

We all want to protect our children but you have to cut the cord at some point. We do our children a disservice when we don't teach them about dangerous situations & allow them to develop the skills they need to recognize them.

while I agree that most 10 year old boys are fine in the rest room I remind people,that what you see is not what you always have. Our friends have a beautiful 5 year old little boy. When you see him he looks just like any other child but he is not. He has autisim. At 10 he will not be going into a restroom alone. His parents are VERY respectful but with a child ,waiting till you find a handicap bathroom just can not always happen. Having a girl scream at them is just adding more hurt.

I had a girl about 8 "freak" out when I was changing my DSG at the pool this week. He is TWO.

I have had many moms of girls tell me after having boys they think in a much different way.

If a mom needs to take a boy into the bathroom she needs to be sure that he is well behaved and stands exactly where she tells him too.

BTW-I have had more little girls look under the stall at me than little boys and the only freaky part of it with either sex is that filthy floor they are touching.

I have also encounter a grandfather in the womens bath because he did not know what to do when his young granddaughter had to go. Did not bother me at all. Better than her being alone in there. We were all in stalls!

 

[disneyjunkie]

It is NOT being rude. My daughter deserves her privacy when she uses the restroom! I certainly wouldn't send her into the mens room to use a stall while your sons are at the urinals! That remark is ridiculous!

Your remark is just as ridiculous.

We aren't doing anything outside the stalls that require privacy.

I wouldn't take a 10 year old boy into the ladies room. However, it would not bother me if I saw one in the bathroom.

I would feel differently if the stalls didn't have doors.

 

[jaminmd]

while I agree that most 10 year old boys are fine in the rest room I remind people,that what you see is not what you always have. Our friends have a beautiful 5 year old little boy. When you see him he looks just like any other child but he is not. He has autisim. At 10 he will not be going into a restroom alone. His parents are VERY respectful but with a child ,waiting till you find a handicap bathroom just can not always happen. Having a girl scream at them is just adding more hurt.

I had a girl about 8 "freak" out when I was changing my DSG at the pool this week. He is TWO.

I have had many moms of girls tell me after having boys they think in a much different way.

If a mom needs to take a boy into the bathroom she needs to be sure that he is well behaved and stands exactly where she tells him too. I agree.

BTW-I have had more little girls look under the stall at me than little boys and the only freaky part of it with either sex is that filthy floor they are touching.

I have also encounter a grandfather in the womens bath because he did not know what to do when his young granddaughter had to go. Did not bother me at all. Better than her being alone in there. We were all in stalls!

I don't condone "screaming" that there is a boy in the restroom but I would never correct my daughter for making a statement about it. After all, one wouldn't expect a 10 year old boy in the women's room.

You make very valid points. The posters who made remarks about young girls needing therapy or being rude were out of line.

 

[jaminmd]

Your remark is just as ridiculous.

We aren't doing anything outside the stalls that require privacy.

I wouldn't take a 10 year old boy into the ladies room. However, it would not bother me if I saw one in the bathroom.

I would feel differently if the stalls didn't have doors.

Yes, it was just as ridiculous! Did you ever think that some little girls may be embarrassed with a boy outside the door "listening"?

Don't tell me a little girl is rude for pointing out a boy in the girls bathroom. That is ridiculous!

ETA: And, BTW, some women will do things in the ladies room, outside of the stalls, that they wouldn't do in public. So, again, not an appropriate place for boys.

 

[MSSANDRA]

Another twist on the situation:

At what age do you allow little girls to go alone to the women's bathroom when out alone with dad?? When is too old to take her to the mens??

Do we consider women's bathrooms safer than men's?????

 

[disneyjunkie]

Yes, it was just as ridiculous! Did you ever think that some little girls may be embarrassed with a boy outside the door "listening"?

I think those girls would be embarrassed no matter who was outside the door.

 

[Leajess99]

Not to add fuel to this fire....but I think that everyone here should be aware that boys (yes even 10 year olds) are often preyed upon by sick men in public restrooms. This is not typically an issue with young girls in women's public restrooms. Theme parks are locations where these sick men would know that they could find or target young boys. I have an 8 year old and a 5 year old boy and I am very conscious about this! Read James Dobson's Bringing Up Boys and you will understand some the statistics here...we must protect our children!!!!! Having said that, I will say that they usually go in with their dad into the Men's room...However, if they are with me (and dad is not along) and there's no family restroom....I take them with me in the women's. Luckily, when this has occurred the restrooms have been empty (at the mall, etc....we've never faced this at Disney) However if I were a single mom or put in a situation where I had no other choice, I would die if another young girl yelled out..."there's a boy in here...." or something like that in front of my two boys...that is just teaching a child to be rude!!!!!! We are very careful to consider others and I teach my boys this....I just wish others would do the same!!!!

Actually that is not teaching the child to be rude it is called observation by the child who is only 6 and knows that boys belong in the boys bathroom when they are as big as her sister. My daughters do not appreciate their privacy in a bathroom meant for them to be ignored and put at risk. At what point does the consideration of others stop being appropriate. What about the girls who have been victims of sex crimes?? I guess they should just live with having to see boys in a place that should be private for them. I also guess you don't let your kids go to waterparks and swim away from you or be babysat or play sports or go to church, etc because there have been cases of child molestation there as well and it is not just done by adults. Better not let your kids go to school either since there have been incidences at school as well. I am not saying that we shouldn't protect kids but kids need to be taught because situations do NOT just happen in bathrooms.

 

[jaminmd]

DH has never had to take DD into the mens room. Fortunately, our DD has a bladder of steel & it has never been an issue. We've always found family restrooms or she's gone in with me.

I understand mothers of boys wanting to protect them. I also understand them bringing them into the ladies room, even if I think they are too old for it. It just really ticked me off that some mothers of boys think that girls or women have no right to be upset seeing them in the bathroom.

They don't want to be questioned on their parenting or be judged for being overprotective. Well, some women are very uncomfortable with older boys in the restroom & you need to be just as respectful of that.

 

[Leajess99]

I don't condone "screaming" that there is a boy in the restroom but I would never correct my daughter for making a statement about it. After all, one wouldn't expect a 10 year old boy in the women's room.

You make very valid points. The posters who made remarks about young girls needing therapy or being rude were out of line.

Funnny thing is I never said my daughter screamed at a boy or screamed it out period. She does make a loud comment (not yelling loud but as a child she will say it loud enough to be heard) about a boy (bigger boy not toddler or preschool size) in the girl's bathroom. As I said I do have a son who is older and he was not using female bathrooms older than 7 and we have been to may theme parks, museums, etc.

 

[Disneymommy2006]

while I agree that most 10 year old boys are fine in the rest room I remind people,that what you see is not what you always have. Our friends have a beautiful 5 year old little boy. When you see him he looks just like any other child but he is not. He has autisim. At 10 he will not be going into a restroom alone. His parents are VERY respectful but with a child ,waiting till you find a handicap bathroom just can not always happen. Having a girl scream at them is just adding more hurt.

I had a girl about 8 "freak" out when I was changing my DSG at the pool this week. He is TWO.

I have had many moms of girls tell me after having boys they think in a much different way.

If a mom needs to take a boy into the bathroom she needs to be sure that he is well behaved and stands exactly where she tells him too.

BTW-I have had more little girls look under the stall at me than little boys and the only freaky part of it with either sex is that filthy floor they are touching.

I have also encounter a grandfather in the womens bath because he did not know what to do when his young granddaughter had to go. Did not bother me at all. Better than her being alone in there. We were all in stalls!

Thank you....that was my point about being considerate!!!! We don't always know or understand everyones' circumstances. My boys do go with their father into the Mens' room the majority of the time but if I were in a different situation (single mom, etc...) I would hope that others would be a little more understanding.

 

[jaminmd]

Funnny thing is I never said my daughter screamed at a boy or screamed it out period. She does make a loud comment (not yelling loud but as a child she will say it loud enough to be heard) about a boy (bigger boy not toddler or preschool size) in the girl's bathroom. As I said I do have a son who is older and he was not using female bathrooms older than 7 and we have been to may theme parks, museums, etc.

I got that. I think I used the word scream but the PP said yelled.

Your DD has every right to point out what she observes!

Wow, I usually don't join in the bickering. This one got to me.