How Much TV do your Kids Watch?

[vhoffman]

I have 2 children, ds9 and dd10. I really think their tv watching has gotten out of control.

Over the summer I didn't have any real restrictions on the tv watching, other than blocking certain channels. We do allow them to watch Disney, Animal Planet, Discovery, Cartoon Network, and the standard line up. Restricting tv to certain times, or a certain amount of time per day/week just never really worked. The two of them could never agree on which shows to watch when, and it seems there's always something on tv they want to watch.

Well, like I said, I didn't make too much of an effort to restrict it during the summer. However, now that school's in session, its becoming a problem. Big time! Seems they have developed certain favorites they want to watch, but that's in between everything else on the tube. When they come home from school the first thing they do is run to the tv. At first I let them have some down time, after all, they have been in school all day, let them unwind awhile. But I literally can't yank them away from the tv to do their homework. Well, I do, but its a constant battle. Dinner time is also a battle against the tv. I do understand having a favorite show, or being right in the middle of a show, and do try to work around it if I can. I don't always have dinner at exactly the same time. But it seems there's always something on the tv, no matter what the time. I can't be expected to wait dinner forever on a tv show!

I've tried going through the tv guide, asking them what their favorite shows are, and allowing them 2 hours per week of tv watching. That became impossible to manage! Each one had a different schedule which overlaps, then I get the whining "..he get's to watch his show!" etc. Even getting them to bed on time is a battle with the tv.

Also, even though I've chosen certain channels for them, I'm appalled at what comes on those seemingly appropriate channels. They're picking up smart mouth attitudes and body language (sigh, roll eyes, etc) from shows like That's So Raven, Cheetah Girls, etc. (not knocking any particular show, just some examples). The last straw was when I discovered they sneak out of bed at night after we've gone to sleep and watch the tv! I caught dd watching tv late one night (this was during the summer) and she saw that Girls Gone Wild ad. That is the most disgusting thing!!!!!!!!They barely shadow out the "bad" parts, anyone can see what they're doing! I did have a discussion with both kids that that is NOT normal or acceptable behavior, only the lowest of the low do things like that, and just because they saw it on tv doesn't make it ok. However, I can't filter out everything they watch.

We're in the middle of a financial setback right now and I'm looking for ways to cut the budget. One way is the cable. DH wants to keep the package we've got, because he says it helps him unwind late at night. I do enjoy watching tv some, but I could take it or leave it. I'm really thinking of just canceling our cable altogether, or just getting basic antenna type service, just something to watch local channels. I would like to get CNN, perhaps A&E. But I simply find I can't keep control of what they're watching when, at least not all the time. If it were just my decision, I'd just unplug the darn thing!!!! However, it is somewhat necessary for dh, at least right now, to have some sort of entertainment (no, I don't mean staying up all night to catch the Girls Gone Wild ad!) . I think everyone around here would benefit from going cold turkey on that thing, at least for awhile!

So, how do the rest of you handle tv watching?

 

[lovesmurfs]

We cut off cable in May 2002 (I think) and never looked back. Yeah, yeah, the history channel and discovery channel are educational. It was withdrawal for the kids (now DS12 and DD7), but they made it through, and know NOTHING of the new toys coming out for Christmas (nor do I have to explain ED to my 7 year old).

Our library has an awesome collection of videos and DVDs (even the shows the kids like), and now I'm in control, not Nielsen. We have joined Blockbuster online ($15.95/mo) so that the grownups can see back episodes of the shows we like (without commercials!).

While your husband is the one needing to wind down, I was the one kicking and screaming away from the cable shut off. Again, an adjustment, but it's really been the best thing for the whole family. We'd tried to control the TV watching XX hours per day/week, but we could never stick to it (because there were always "reasons" for needing to watch "just this once"). Turning off the cable completely worked much better.

 

[jennieb]

I know exactly what you are talking about. I have 4 kids - ages 19, 17, 13, 9. A few years ago I decided that our family's time was absorbed completely by TV and I hated it. I discussed it with my husband and he agreed to try lessening the tv with me. We set the rule that there was no tv in our house from Monday thru Thursday. The tv could come back on when they got home from school on Friday and we turned it off on Sunday when we went to bed. We did not restrict during school holidays.

I absolutely loved it. We found so much more time together as a family. We started playing board games as a family. We would read a chapter book outloud to the whole family. We took walks and the younger ones would do "shows" for us at night. We turned on the stereo and danced in the family room. It was great.

The year before last when my oldest was a Senior in High School they had a mutiny so to speak when school began again. Basically there was a meltdown and everyone told me how unfair I was because they didn't know what the cool shows were, etc. I caved and said they could watch tv again.

Last year I said no tv until after homework is done.

This year I'm changing again and saying that we will not turn our tv on until after dinner and the dishes are done. Homework must be completed right after school so it will be done before dinner.

There are lots of good things on tv - but there are lots of not so good things too. Once the tv is turned on it just sucks you in and you can't get away from it. In our house if the tv is on when they get home from school it just keeps them mesmerized as they watch junk that they really don't care about.

I hope that helps.

Jennieb

 

[hidmickey:myantidrug]

Here at my house (It's me, 16, and my mom, 37) we have the tv on from the time we wake up to the time we go to bed. I do hw in front of the tv that I start as soon as I get home. I work better with noise, silence makes me paranoid-ish for some reason so it's easier to work for me in noise, I don't know why. I do very well in school, straight As, all advanced classes. I am active in after school clubs and take part in sports so it's not as if I go home, plop on the couch and never get up. TV watching doesn't affect me in that way. We watch tv during dinner, too. I know people say that dinner at a dining table is better for family time but my mom and I communicate well anyway but we still talk during the show and we can also communiate about what is on the tv and start conversations about that. We no longer have a dining table; we converted our dining room into a family room. I know there are a lot of people against this but it doesn't hurt us and it's how we live but I can certainly understand why parents would want to restrict it.

In your situation, cutting cable out may be the best to wein them from the channels that you won't get without it but I'm sure you won't want to deprive yourself or DH of it as well. It's a tough case.

I'm also totally with you when it comes to kid's shows straying away from being good, quality shows teaching good behavior, etc.. As an example, I babysat my cousins (6, 4, 3) all summer and the older 2 asked to watch Spongebob Square Pants (which my aunt and uncle do not allow them to watch so they must hear from school or another such place) and I absolutly would not allow it. I hate it with such a passion. Talk about no manners, rude, talking back, etc.! It's unbelievable. It's no wonder your kids are sneeking out of bed (no offense to you here), preteen/kid shows that they show on Disney shows show kids doing these actions! When I was their age, I was watchin Barney, Sesame Street, Blue's Clues (which you may still find me watching now ) and the worst thing on (which I still happened to love) was Rugrats with Angelica which I wasn't allowed to watch until I was 8 or 10 (I can't remember which). I'm with you in seeing a decline in what is stressed in children's shows.

 

[Barbers2005]

We have dish network at our house and with the DVR can record two channels at once. This has actually helped to cut down on tv watching for dh, dd and myself. Our "can't live without it" shows are recorded automatically each episode, and we do a search on our favorite tv stations once a week for any movies/shows that we really want to see. Now we only turn the tv on to watch shows that we already recorded and we get to fast forward through all the commercials. Dh and I especially used to turn the tv on b/c we felt like watching something but not be able to find anything we really wanted to watch. Somehow, instead of turning the tv off, we would just veg out and watch whatever was on. Now when we feel like watching tv, we play one of the recorded shows that we already planned on watching.

 

[vhoffman]

We're thinking of cutting back our cable package to something more basic,but that won't stop them from watching it. Seems just about every basic package has Cartoon Nretork and Disney Channel. And dh still does some tv before going to bed, much the same way I like to read before bed. We've decided to cut down our cable package, but literally unplug all the tv's in the house except the one in dh's office room, from Sunday night until Friday afternoon. Tomorrow starts it officially, they can leave it on Fri-Sun, but come Monday nothing! I'm sure it will be hard at first, but they will find other ways to pass their time--like doing homework! Also, I plan to let them get videos from the library. That way they can watch something, but I have more control over the content. The way both kids climg to that tv, our electric bill might just go down, too!

 

[Waggy182]

Five years ago we enacted the following:

No TV on school nights.

Chores finished upon arrival home from school, then snack if desired, then homework.

Family meals every night if no sports/activites.

Usually a board game of some type (30-45 min.).

Bed by 9:30 PM. (Up at 6 AM)


The first day of no TV there was minor grumbling, then no complaints after that.

 

[kaysmommie]

My kids watch about and hour a day or maybe a movie in the evening. DS 2 loves the Wiggles and little Einsteins. DD6 loves the Cheetah Girls and Raven. Also she love Lizzie too. She does have a little attitude these days but I think more from the girls at school.

 

[tricia]

I just posted the school year rules in my place for DS9 and DS5. It contains rules such as dinner in the dining room. Homework to be done right after the dishes are cleared and MAX of 2 hrs of TV per day. The older one easily finds other things to do, but that little one would just stay glued to the tube if I let him.

 

[solgent]

We have never had cable and my kids do not watch any TV. They are 8, 12 and 12. They watch a movie on DVD, either rented or one that we own, once or twice a week.

They also know that, on occasions when the three of them have to agree on something, if it turns into an argument, nobody gets it. This makes our lives more pleasant, but I also think it is wonderful for them to learn how to negotiate and compromise. And often, when one has finally agreed to let the others get a movie she doesn't want, she finds that she likes it after all. That is a good lesson, too, to try something based on someone else's recommendation.

You are the parent!

 

[Longsx3]

DD(10) doesn't watch a lot of TV and when she does it is only after Homework is done. Homework is typically done right after school, especially on soccer days.

 

[vhoffman]

We really need to cut down our tv cable bill, just for the financial aspect--$53 month is wayyyy too high. However, just cutting it out altogether penalizes us. DH really does use it as a stress relief. He does enjoy a few shows right before bed to help unwind. The way I figure it, he works hard, he deserves some relaxation. But ist so out of hand with the kids.

Here's what we've decided--

Change our cable package to one with fewer options, would lower our bill to $39 month. That's a savings of $14 month. Then, unplug all the tv's in the house, from Sunday night at 6 pm, throught the week until Friday night, about 6 pm. That gives the kids the weekend for tv watching, but I'm still going to restrict the content then. During the week, dh has a tv in his home office where he usually likes to watch it. The office is usually kept locked, anyways, so the kids can't get into sensitive materials. So after the kids are in bed dh can watch his tv (provided he's done his homework, brushed his teeth, picked up his toys and clothes, and packed his back backpack for the next day......oops, those were the kids' rules! Might as well set an example!).

I imagine there will be some adjustment problems at first, but they'll get used to it. I will allow the kids to watch videos from the library, Netflix, etc during the week, but that's something we have to work out. The videos will be pre-approved by Mom, and they won't have the Girls Gone Wild clip or other ads! Maybe a video for getting a 100 on their spelling test? Something like that.....this will take some time and head scratching to work out. I really don't want to be the meanie here, I do realize that certain shows are important to a person, but when its gotten as out-of-hand as it has here, something has to be done. The kids both are just glued to that tv!Those constant cartoons are irritating, it gets on my nerves!

When I was a child I watched my share of tv, but the children's shows werent' as constant as they are now. I remember liking a few children's shows when I came home from school, then there really wasn't much to interest a child from about 5 pm on......there were those sappy family programs, like Donna Reed, Leave it to Beaver, etc., we usually watched, but I remember disctintly they came on 8-8:30 pm, maybe one per weeknight. A good time because dinner was through, homework was done, it was just one half-hour and didn't interfere with the household routine. We had just one tv per household back in those days, so it became more of a family shared activity rather than a way to isolate everyone, each with his own tv, in seperate rooms, like it is now. Also, sappy as those shows were, they did teach values, standards, and set an example of proper conduct (yes ma'a'm/sir to teachers and parents, homes kept neat, mother's who behaved like ladies instead of white trash............). Well, that was then, this is now. Best to get control over that thing!

 

[disneymagicgirl]

i don't allow my dd7 to watch tv at all on school nights. there is just too much to do...homework, straighten up the house, dinner, bath, etc....after all that gets done, if there is time left over, she reads. On weekends, i do not restrict the tv watching at all, but we are often not home due to errands, etc.

 

[Dontgel]

One way to control the TV is with the TiVo KidZone. You can record what you want your kids to watch and keep it in a special section. They can't get into the rest. The system is free if you're a TiVo subscriber. It also gives you lists of suggested good programming for kids. The lists are produced by child advocacy groups both liberal and conservative. Although I sometimes do work for TiVo (full disclosure) I'm posting this as a parent who's been through some real TV battles and think this is a great solution.

 

[vhoffman]

Hey, thanks for the TiVo suggestion! I'll have to look into the details, but it sound perfect. I don't want to take everything away from them, and I realize some of those shows are important, at least to them. Sounds like this way we can control the timing and amount of time spent, which is my biggest problem, along with the content. Thanks again!

 

[jennieb]

I forgot to mention in my earlier post that we have Tivo. I love Tivo. I agree that we watch less tv because of Tivo. We can skip the commercials and we have prerecorded things that we like that are great for the whole family and we have things that only my husband and I watch - the Sopranos for example - totally inappropriate for the kids, but you need the code to watch it. So it works out for us.

We also decided years ago that our kids would not have a tv in their room. When my hubby was growing up he had a tv in his room and he just camped out in there as a teenager. In my house we only had the family room tv and we all watched together.

In our house we only have the tv in the family room. Everyone watches together and we always know what is on the tv. Everyone sits together and we love to have "movie fests" particularly on rainy or snowy cold yucky days.

I think you will be very happy with your decision to turn off the tv. It really has made a huge difference in our family. Let us know how it goes. The first week might be tough but have some good ideas up your sleeve for you and your kids to do for the next few weeks. Get some craft supplies and borrow some craft books or whatever from the library. Dig out the board games and get some good books to read out loud to them.

Hope that helps.

Jennieb

 

[emma'smom]

What do you do about times when the children are not really watching TV, but the adults are (and I don't really mean inappropriate things). I will often turn the Today Show on in the morning while we are getting showered and dressed. Does this count as "kids watching tv"? They are really paying attention, but they are around.

In the summer, my children really don't watch any television at all except for Mickey Mouse Playhouse on Saturday morning. Once it gets cold and they can't play outside any longer, they tend to watch a 1/2 hour or so while I get dinner ready (usually Sesame Street since this is the time when it comes on).

However, they do watch DVD's in the car when we go on car trips longer than four hours or so (Dora, Elmo, Max and Ruby, Arthur). It keeps us all sane!

 

[vhoffman]

We'll look into a more basic package. Unfortunately the all have Cartoon Newwork! I really can't just unplug it--it really is a source of needed entertainment around here. Just today, a Saturday afternoon, dh and the kids are gathered around the tv with a good movie on. It helps fill time. I'm just tired of competing with those shows during the week and juggling homework, dinner, and bed around it. But those shows are important to dd. Its a bonding thing with her friends, they discuss certain shows, the characters, etc.

I really like the TiVo idea. We can let the kids pick out what to record, then perhaps give them a time each day to watch a show. By filtering out the commercials its less time, and we don't have the influence of them. I can't just totally pull the plug on something that is important to them. Also, many of those shows are educational. My ds especially likes How Things Work, and they both love Animal Planet, which is both educational and teaches compassion for living creatures. I just need to get control over how the tv viewing is done. Great idea, the TiVo!

 

[hoosiergirl7]

We have DirecTV with TiVo and it allows us to record TV and watch after our DS 2.5 is in bed. We do allow him to watch TV a few times a week. We TiVo Little Einsteins and occasionally Sesame Street for him and sometimes he's allowed to watch while they're on. He's learned some stuff from these shows. However, we spend most of our time encouraging him to use his imagination and playing with Lego's, Trains, etc. I also spend time teaching him things he'll need to know (colors, shapes, alphabet - which he knew at 22 months, states, presidents, etc.) I know some people think I'm pushing him to be an overachiever, but when your son's favorite phrase is, "what's that?", you tell him. Our son loves to be read to and could have you read the same book to him 5 times in a row. Both DH and I are readers and are constantly reading during our down time or before bed.

I grew up in a house, and I'm not faulting my parents for this, but we had TV's in our bedrooms and were allowed to watch TV whenever we wanted to as long as our everything we had to do was done, homework, chores, etc. Luckily I did spend a lot of time reading back then too, but my siblings didn't and all they do in their down time is watch TV. And that was one thing we decided we were not going to do is give our kids TV's in their rooms. We want them to find other things to do and to learn that TV is a priviledge, not a given.

I know a good friend of mine give her kids tickets (like the kind you can buy in giant rolls at Party City and Office Supply stores). She gives each of the kids a certain number of tickets a week. And each ticket is good for 30 minutes of either computer time, TV time or video game time. Once they use all of them, that's it for the week. I don't remember the number she gives them each, but she says they have learned to choose their activities wisely since they know they are limited and once the tickets are gone, that's it. I really like the idea and hope to start it when my kiddo is old enough. I guess about age 5 is when she started with her's.


April 1986 - off-site
Sept 2004 - Port Orleans
Sept 2006 - off-site

 

[JVL1018]

Okay, I'll admit it...my kids watch a lot of TV, and I don't limit their TV time.

They are active, play with their dolls, Legos, Lincoln Logs, HotWheels, etc. They color and draw all the time, read a lot and would rather be outside running around or riding their bikes most days. DD does 2 dance classes once a week and they both play softball/baseball in the spring.

Sooo..I am not concerned about them becoming couch potatoes. TV is not a big treat, it is just there, if they want to sit in front of it for hours at a time one day, I am fine with it because I know the next they will be so busy
it won't even get turned on.
The ONLY time I would limit it is if they started wanting to watch it constantly instead of doing all their fun non-TV stuff.