How long do you give your guests to decide to go?

[FreeTime]

We have invited a family to go with us later this year. They seemed gung ho and we even agreed to change the week we were planning to go to accomodate them (I haven't changed the ressie yet). Well 2 weeks ago they asked how much it was going to cost them (we are charging them nothing for the room) and I haven't heard them mention it since. Should I ask them what their plans are or just assume that they aren't going? I don't want to put them in an embarrasing spot if they don't think that they can afford to go, but I don't want the time to come and them ask where their room is. How much longer should I wait to hear from them?

 

[crisi]

Now.

Call them up and say "hey, I was just about to switch our reservation to that week that works for you guys and wanted to make sure you were still planning on going."

 

[sgtdisney]

If you are concerned, I would ask them now too. I agree with what crisi suggested. Call them up and just let them know you are about to change the reservations and wanted to make sure that was the week that worked best for them. You can even stress that the reservations are harder to switch as the time for the trip gets closer and you just want to make sure that those days work best for them.

 

[Cruelladeville]

Call the family now to get a decision. However, you need to consider what you will do if they decide not to go after you do all this planning and changing of ressies that you are doing to accommodate them. Will you still be ok with the new ressies if that should happen? Just think about it. You will need to be quite clear that you want a definite answer, if they hem and haw around, plan a vacation without them. Maybe they can go some other year.

 

[tinkerbee]

I would just call them up a point blank ask them if they are going or not. I ran into this problem, where I asked DF family to go they all said yes now his sister is like"how much is it going to cost me?" This really upset me since we are staying in a two bedroom at OKW so that isn't costing them anything. I paid for her two childrens 5 day hopper tickets. And I'm also paying for food and gas. So the only thing she has to pay for is her ticket and souviners. To me that is a bargin. Ask them one more time and if they dilly dally about it go and have a wonderful time with out them and try again next time:

 

[InstImpres]

Originally posted by tinkerbee
This really upset me since we are staying in a two bedroom at OKW so that isn't costing them anything. I paid for her two childrens 5 day hopper tickets. And I'm also paying for food and gas. So the only thing she has to pay for is her ticket and souviners. To me that is a bargin. A

Tinkerbee - can I be your friend - that's a great deal

 

[cgcw]

When we returned from our last trip, we were out to dinner with some really close friends. We started talking about our trip and said "next Christmas, maybe you want to go with us". They got very excited and DH and I started to make plans (fortunately, on paper and in our minds only). The next thing, they start talking about they don't know whether their older daughter would be able to get out of school. They are still giving us the impression they are interested in going. We start talking about how they will need a 2 bedroom as there are 5 of them, and we'll stay in a 1 bedroom (4 of us). We're trying to figure this out on our end and next we hear from them that their travel agent is working on a June trip and can we give them advice as to where they should be staying. We're like...........excuse us, what about December? They have since not made any plans for June. We have decided to not go in December -- so we're hoping they are not planning on going either. Will we ask again?? NO!

Sorry for the rant -- To answer your original question, I'd call!

 

[anniet]

While I do think it is rude for people to not give an answer in a timely manner, I also think sometimes it may be hard for some people to accept so much generosity. I mean if a friend of mine said come down and spend a week in my timeshare with me and you don't have to pay a thing, I think I'd feel like I was taking advantage of them, even if I really wanted to go. If someone invited me for a week in Disney with them, I personally would insist on paying in some way right from the beginning, but then again, I'm not known for holding back and I know there are people out there who are not as straightforward as I tend to be.

Perhaps these people are grateful for the invitation, but feel awkward accepting it.

I know others in my family would feel the way I do, so I'm planning a vacation for family in 2005 and told them that $100 per night, per family will cover my costs. I'll be booking at least a grand villa and two studios (unless I add on) and it will take 3 years worth of points for me to do so. I think they expect to pay at least that much for a decent hotel, and this way it cuts way down on the awkward feeling factor.

I don't think our friends mean to be rude, I just think some of them don't know how to accept a generous gesture like a trip to WDW.

Little do they know, we extend the invitations for a somewhat selfish reason;because we want to share the magic with everyone we care about!

 

[crisi]

And for some people the incidentals are significant.

In addition to the room, the significant budget lines of our vacations include:

Park tickets (not cheap)
Food (you can apply strict budgeting here, particularly in a multiroom DVC unit, but as guests of a member, you may feel embarrassed not to spend)
Airfare (or gas, which nowadays isn't a bargain)
Souveniers

A family of four is probably not going to get by for less than a couple thousand bucks if they need to fly. Thats a hell of a lot of money to a lot of people

A lot of people don't realize how expensive this is going to be - and may have other places to put their money. In the first invitation, it sounds like a lovely idea, and then they get in the car and DH says to DW "you know, I wonder how expensive this will be?, I was really looking forward to putting on the deck this summer." Park tickets, in particular, come with sticker shock, espeically for a six or seven day trip for a family.

No one likes to admit that they can't afford it. And they don't want to sound like you aren't being generous enough. So they hem and haw. It helps to be able to give them an out.

 

[WDWguruDH]

We had this same situation, invited extended family and offered to book and cover the room (DVC of course). We explained the other costs in detail so they would have the total picture. We set a deadline by which they had to let us know - told them it was the reservation deadline, it was. We then callled on the day of the deadline and they indicated they couldn't at this time, but wanted to try again. We discussed new dates and set a new deadline for their answer. They appreciate our efforts and don't mind the deadline, they understand why we must know.

 

[FreeTime]

Well I took your advice and left them a message explaining that if they don't want or aren't able to know that I understand. Well they are still emailing me about other things but ignoring the Disney topic! I have decided that I am just going to make my own plans, at this point what else can I do? So my family and I will be inviting someone else. I hope they don't get too mad!

 

[ClarabelleCow]

I wouldn't have left the info on the machine. Who knows, maybe a kid deleted it and said, hey so and so called, or they never got the message. I would call back and say please call me. If they havent mentioned it in e-mails, they may have not gotten the message. Or really didn't think you were serious in the first place like someone else said, that they don;t know how to respond to such a huge invitation.

 

[reneesam]

I have invited some friends and family to stay with us in the past. My problem was that they took the offer sort of casually, and didn't feel we needed to know for sure. I realize now that this was MY fault. I don't think I was specific enough to them about what our needs and deadlines were. These days I

-ask at least 1 yr in advance
-ask again before I book the ressie
-try to get them their own accomodations (a lock off is ideal as my immediate family only needs a 1 BR)
-confirm well ahead of cancellation deadlines
-inform them (nicely) about the point system. Many folks think we are inviting them for a stay at "our place" at Disney. It's not a wide open house, and I let them know that we rent specifically based on their ability to come and that it will affect our next year of vacations based on how many people we need to accomodate.
-inform them of other costs (it's best to travel with folks who've been there before so they aren't shocked)
charge a nominal fee...I agree it helps to "save face" and also helps them to commit