How important were your wedding photos?

[Ember]

This is a spin off from the wedding board about a bridesmaid getting a tattoo prior to the wedding, but it's a sentiment I've heard many times. Brides want their photos to look perfect and this seems to trump common sense sometimes. It's normal to expect to have to buy a dress and maybe shoes when you're a bridesmaid, but I've personally heard of brides insisting their bridesmaids loose weight, dye their hair, whiten their teeth, get tans, etc. There was even a Boing Boing story of a bride demanding her bridesmaids have breast surgery!

http://boingboing.net/2008/07/25/brides-demand-breast.html

These demands are always put forth under the same guise of being "so the pictures look good!" This trend also seems to be getting more common... How much do you think is asking too much for the sake of photos?

 

[coolbeans]

if the bride is paying to enhance my bust... i'm all for it!!!

 

[luvmy3]

I picked my bridesmaids because the were my best friends and family who I love and wanted them to be a part of the most important day in my life. I wouldn't have cared what they looked like in my photos, and if you could see some of dh's groomsman you would know I'm not lying . If I was in a wedding and the bride put those demands on me, I'd tell her that she could find another bridesmaid.

 

[golfgal]

We spent more on wedding photos than anything else for our wedding but even then I wasn't paying for enhancements for anyone . These Bridzilla's REALLY need to get a life. There are far more important things in life then worrying about your bridesmaids having big chests. I do know some people like this though.

I would have been upset with members of my wedding party if they had gotten a mohawk like the best man did at the wedding we attended a couple weeks ago (just in time for the wedding) but then again, I wouldn't have asked anyone to be in my wedding party that would have intentionally gone out of their way to do something like this for our wedding either.

People have to realize that there is no such thing as perfect and the more you TRY to be perfect the less perfect things will be.

 

[Mrs. Charming]

I think the whole "perfect" wedding thing is becoming absurd. People who normally don't look like models suddenly want their wedding pictures to look like they're right out of Modern Bride. Ugh. I remember one episode of My Fair Wedding w/ David Tutera, one heavily tattooed brides was all airbrushed for her ceremony and pictures. REALLY?! Her pictures weren't "her" then... imho. That also reminds me of all the stories that a good friend or sister wasn't chosen to be a bridesmaid because of her weight, and would "ruin" the pictures... seriously?? Breast surgery for a bridesmaid is just obscene. C'mon.

It's funny, looking back, I have a few of our wedding pics in frames around the house, but my favorite is a really silly shot of us... I love it. I'd seriously run back into a burning building to save it.

Oh, and our wedding photos that we have displayed are outnumbered 5:1 with pics of our DD!! LMAO. There are pics of her *everywhere*!

 

[marlynnp]

not that important.

Granted we still have one wedding photo displayed on my piano. But the fact is after you're married you hopefully enjoy a lot more experiences which also get photographed and the wedding picture move out of the way for those.


I think it's very sad that so many couples, most often the brides, get wrapped up in having a perfect WEDDING instead of spending their time and energy working toward a perfect MARRIAGE.

 

[Luvchefmic]

I saw a commercial recently that was about a show (don't think it was Bridezillas but could have been) and one person refering to a demanding bride said "If there was a peacock in the room it would have tried to mate with her"! seems like all sense & sensibility goes out the window with self-centered types Its all about them and we just live in their world

 

[RayaniFoxmur]

The only pictures we have up from our wedding anywhere are just ones of the two of us together. Our parents have us and them in their homes.

Other than that our pictures are just sitting on a digital CD for if I ever wanna make a book out of them or something, or for our Scrapbook. We don't even look at our pictures.

I chose my girls and he chose his guys based on our relationship to them. Not on how they looked. What did we care? We loved them for who they were!

 

[AKL_Megs]

I am glad we have photos, but I would be fine with keeping only two or three of the HUNDREDS that we had taken.

I have two collages hanging in our bedroom hallway, a photo in our bedroom, and another in our guest bedroom, but only because we don't have kids, pets, or take exciting vacations to put any OTHER photos up!

 

[disykat]

Looks had nothing to do with choosing who was in our wedding. But it was it was important enough to make DH go in for a fresh haircut and to make sure the clothes were flattering on everyone, but no trying for perfection. I do think it's important for everyone to try to look nice though. It would never have occured to me to try to dictate hair, makeup, or anything like that, nor would I have been in a wedding where a bride did so.

DH likes his hair short, but he's too cheap to get it cut often enough to keep it that way. His hair was growing out, but he "thought he could get another month out of the cut." ERGH! I told him he could, of course, do what he wanted but I was disappointed that I was going to a lot of effort to look my very best for him on our special day - all the way down to new underwear - and he couldn't be bothered to get a haircut. He got it cut. Honestly, if I hadn't said anything it wouldn't even have occured to him to try to look his personal best.

 

[Shyvioletisme]

well I didn't ask much...heck I even let my BMs pick out their own dresses. I was there, but let them have the final say.
as far as the perfect thing...clearly doesn't matter to me as I myself got 2 new tattoos on my front shoulder area about 6 months before our wedding, so clearly what my "girls" did before the wedding didn't care. I let them pick their own hairstyles and makeup and shoes. I was REALLY laid back.

 

[MM27]

I think some of these brides are lucky that the whole bridal party and their future husband, doesn't walk out on them. Yes, it's your special day, but it doesn't give you a free pass to be a ***** to everyone.

If you pick a person to be in your wedding party that you know has tattoos, you have no business telling them to cover them. If you pick someone that is overweight, it's very nervy to give them an ultimatum to be in your wedding they must lose weight. You knew ahead of time what their size was. If their chest is not large enough for you, same thing.

Some of these brides need to get over themselves.

I saw one episode of Bridezillas where the bride was telling all her bridesmaids that they needed to lose weight, and she was very large herself.

 

[powellrj]

I'm not even sure where mine are at. I think they are upstairs in a closet, or they could be in the kids storage area or maybe the attic. I guess I need to look for them!

 

[TheZue]

The photos didn't matter to me. Having my best friends I grew up with standing beside me along with my soon to be sister in law mattered more than anything. I didn't care what they looked like. Two of my brides maids cut off all their hair in the months before my wedding, and one was pregnant with a large visable tatoo on her arm. I didn't care, I would rather have real friends who were free to be who they were. I can't imagine being that concerned about their apearances.

 

[shortbun]

We took family photos at our wedding and some traditional wedding photos. I would have photographed ANY getup/outfit/tattoo my friends and family came up with. I love them for who they are and besides, it makes for good laughs and conversation later!!!

 

[Disney Doll]

We picked our attendants because they were important friends or family to us. We had all shaped, sizes, colors, hair colors etc. The pictures were important to capturte our day with our loved ones, not to capture our day with our airbrushed-to-perfection loved ones.

I was a pretty low key bride though.

 

[aristocatz]

I read that thread and I am currently planning my wedding.

My wedding photos are VERY important to me-I want to capture my special day and I want it to be just perfect......

But, I should clarify a little.....I don't mind if my 2 BM have tattoos, pink hair, whatever. Neither do, but I wouldn't mind if that's who they are. I love them and it's most important to me that they are standiung next to me in those photos so I can remember it always.

But I would be mortified if *I* did not look pretty or *perfect* on my special day. If I did not look my best (as defined by me!), I would be sad about my photos.

 

[maslex]

Oh does this thread strike a nerve with me....

I got married back in '93. My Dh's sister was one of my bridesmaids as was my sister and 3 of my closet friends. Now keep in mind, I am overweight (big time LOL) and all of my bridesmaids were of normal size.

Anyways, fast forward 10yrs and SIL is getting married (she has no sisters) She asks her DH's cousin, her cousin and her friend to stand up for her. I'm thinking OKAAAYYYYY, I was kind of hoping she was going to ask me. I mean we've been family/good friends for 15 yrs now. But nope!!! Then to top it off, her husband asks HER BROTHER (which is MY husband) to stand up for him because he thinks of him as his brother. And then the groom has SEVEN people stand up for him with the bride only having the three. Till this day I still don't know why I was never asked (I mean I could have been paired up with my husband who stood up). And she IS the type that wants everything perfect, plus all the girls were these little tiny things. So it's always been in my head that she didn't want me in the wedding because of my size and that I would have "ruined" her pictures. But whatever, it just baffles me.

 

[golfgal]

I read that thread and I am currently planning my wedding.

My wedding photos are VERY important to me-I want to capture my special day and I want it to be just perfect......

But, I should clarify a little.....I don't mind if my 2 BM have tattoos, pink hair, whatever. Neither do, but I wouldn't mind if that's who they are. I love them and it's most important to me that they are standiung next to me in those photos so I can remember it always.

But I would be mortified if *I* did not look pretty or *perfect* on my special day. If I did not look my best (as defined by me!), I would be sad about my photos.

Just some advice, your day will not be perfect, you will not be perfect but you can have a lovely wedding still. If you want perfection you will only be disappointed. Relax and enjoy your day and don't sweat the small stuff-like flowers arriving an hour late so most of your photos are sans flowers or your musicians almost missing your wedding because they wrote down the wrong time. In the long run it really doesn't matter.

 

[englishteacha]

My pictures are important to me. We didn't hire a photographer, though. We were 22 and paid for our wedding ourselves. Our wedding and reception came to $1500, including our attire and one of my bridesmaid's dresses (she was more broke than we were). A friend of the family took photos, and all our guests sent us copies of their pictures, so we have over 400 photos of our wedding.

One of my bridesmaids is almost 6' tall, a bit plump, and the other is 5'2" and had just had a baby 2 months before and was still tiny. They looked lovely just as they are, in their $40 off the rack dresses. I can't imagine asking my friends to change their appearance for a wedding, other than asking them to look nice. I got my hair done that day at a salon, as did one of my 'maids; the new mom didn't have time to go to the salon so a friend of mine did her hair for her in a quick up-do. We all looked great, we had a great time, and we are still friends. Isn't that what it's about? Oh, and DH and I are about to celebrate our 8th anniversary.