How exactly to say "I do"

[helloirishkitty]

Hey ladies!

What are you all doing for vows? Are you writing your own, sticking to the traditional ones, or a little bit of both?

I know I don't want VERY traditional vows, but I'm not comfortable spewing my soul in front of 200 people.

I'd love to know how everyone is saying their vows. And even see some examples

 

[alissa2008]

Our officiant wrote ours for us. they're beautiful. Who do you have? and what kind of ceremony -- some religions don't allow for self-written vows.


OUR VOWS:

From this day on, I, Alissa, choose you, Tim, to be my husband, to live with you and laugh with you, to stand by your side and sleep in your arms, to communicate with you, labor with you, and encourage you to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I am. I promise to always love you, to hold you, and to adore you in good times and in bad, enjoy you, console you, delight you, astound you when I can, to work with you to build our love, to speak openly and honestly and maintain the respect and trust that has grown between us. Give thanks to you always and to die with this love that I have for you. This is my solemn vow.

 

[perla75]

Our officiant wrote ours for us. they're beautiful. Who do you have? and what kind of ceremony -- some religions don't allow for self-written vows.


OUR VOWS:

From this day on, I, Alissa, choose you, Tim, to be my husband, to live with you and laugh with you, to stand by your side and sleep in your arms, to communicate with you, labor with you, and encourage you to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I am. I promise to always love you, to hold you, and to adore you in good times and in bad, enjoy you, console you, delight you, astound you when I can, to work with you to build our love, to speak openly and honestly and maintain the respect and trust that has grown between us. Give thanks to you always and to die with this love that I have for you. This is my solemn vow.

Wow, that's so pretty! Do you have to memorize all that or can you bring a card? I can definately see myself being so nervous up there and not being able to remember all that!

 

[lurkyloo]

Do you have to memorize all that or can you bring a card? I can definately see myself being so nervous up there and not being able to remember all that!

I didn't like any of the many many sets of sample vows I found by Googling "wedding vows" (hint, hint ), so we wrote our own. No way were we memorizing them, though. We wrote them out and brought them with us.

DH kept his in his suit pocket. I realized too late that I had no pockets, so I had to improvise...

 

[alissa2008]

That is the best face ever, Carrie!!

Well, I think the officiant says them first and you repeat after - at least in our case...its like the "to have and to hold" traditional vow type.

 

[perla75]

I didn't like any of the many many sets of sample vows I found by Googling "wedding vows" (hint, hint ), so we wrote our own. No way were we memorizing them, though. We wrote them out and brought them with us.

DH kept his in his suit pocket. I realized too late that I had no pockets, so I had to improvise...

LMAO Carrie! That photo is priceless!!

 

[PhilHarMaestro]

I'm going very traditional... the "with this ring...blah, blah." I want all the "thee's" and "thou's" and of course the I Do (NOT I will). I work in a church, so I've asked the pastor there to write down all of the traditional stuff, exactlly as it was originally interpreted and I'm sending it to our officiant! I'm boring, I know!

 

[Ember]

We wrote our own. We actually wrote our whole ceremony so it was very personal and meaningful to us.

We had a statement of intent, which is where we said "I do":

Steven, Do you take Brandy to be your wife? Do you promise to love her, honor her, inspire her, protect and
provide for her above all others and to be with her through all of life’s challenges, chaos and joys?

And then we had our actual vows that were repeated:

I, Steven, take you, Brandy, to be my wife from this time onward. To join with you and to share all that is to come. To be faithful and honest, to give and to receive, to speak and to listen, to inspire and to respond. A commitment made in love, kept in faith, and eternally made new.

 

[MainStMandy]

Our officiant wrote ours for us. they're beautiful. Who do you have? and what kind of ceremony -- some religions don't allow for self-written vows.


OUR VOWS:

From this day on, I, Alissa, choose you, Tim, to be my husband, to live with you and laugh with you, to stand by your side and sleep in your arms, to communicate with you, labor with you, and encourage you to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I am. I promise to always love you, to hold you, and to adore you in good times and in bad, enjoy you, console you, delight you, astound you when I can, to work with you to build our love, to speak openly and honestly and maintain the respect and trust that has grown between us. Give thanks to you always and to die with this love that I have for you. This is my solemn vow.

That is beautiful! Gave me goosebumps!

 

[MainStMandy]

Our officiant wrote ours for us. they're beautiful. Who do you have? and what kind of ceremony -- some religions don't allow for self-written vows.


OUR VOWS:

From this day on, I, Alissa, choose you, Tim, to be my husband, to live with you and laugh with you, to stand by your side and sleep in your arms, to communicate with you, labor with you, and encourage you to bring out the best in you always, and, for you, to be the most that I am. I promise to always love you, to hold you, and to adore you in good times and in bad, enjoy you, console you, delight you, astound you when I can, to work with you to build our love, to speak openly and honestly and maintain the respect and trust that has grown between us. Give thanks to you always and to die with this love that I have for you. This is my solemn vow.

Sorry double post. Love the pic Carrie!

 

[Sleeping_Princess]

Good Morning..

My DF and I have decided to write our own vows, I am an English teacher and he is a musician. So I figured between the two of us, we could come up with something..

We also are not going to memorize them, I think I am going to give them to the officant the night before at the rehearsal (the pastor is a friend of ours) and then have a mic set up so that we can read off the paper as the pastor holds it..

Good Luck on whatever you decide! -- there are so many sites out there if you want to write your vows, there are even sites that have worksheets where all you need to do is add your own personal information!

Happy Planning

 

[purplegirl247]

I did a bit of research online first. We opted for a non-religious ceremony, but there's lots of help with that as well, like lukyloo said. The way I figure it, there's three ways to exchange vows: where you and your DH read your own vows, where the officiant asks you to repeat after him, and where the officiant asks you a question and you answer "I do." Since we knew we'd be nervous, we went with the latter two, so we didn't have to memorize anything.

I think my vows might be on the shorter side, and they're definitely more irreverent than most, but hopefully it'll help you at least a little:

I, <full name>, take you, <full name>, to be my lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, for as long as we both shall live.

Do you, Steven, pledge to support Christine in all things, to love her above all others, to listen to her when she needs comfort, and most importantly, to buy her milk because she’s too lazy to get it herself?

Christine, please repeat after me.

I, <full name>, take you, <full name>, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, for as long as we both shall live.

Do you, Christine, pledge to support Steven in all things, to build him up when he feels down, to comfort him when he is sad, and most importantly, to think about buying him video games and Guinness beer, as long as the timing and budget are appropriate?

{Look to audience} Can you tell who wrote these vows?

Do you, Steven and Christine, promise to encourage each other professionally, socially, and emotionally? To guide each other, through dark times and bright? And that only one of you will freak out about finances at any given time?

And now for the rings.

Steven, repeat after me. “I give you this ring, as a visible and constant symbol, of our wedding vows. Please don’t remove it, in times of anger, for they are fleeting, and our love is steadfast. With this ring, I thee wed.”

Christine, repeat after me. “I give you this ring, as a visible and constant symbol, of our wedding vows. Please don’t remove it, in times of anger, for they are fleeting, and our love is steadfast. With this ring, I thee wed.”

We also threw in a reference to Princess Bride because, well, I wrote the vows so I could do whatever I wanted. *grins* I think the full vows are in my planning journal, if you want the whole effect...

HTH!

 

[PrincessBrideKatie]

I'm going very traditional... the "with this ring...blah, blah." I want all the "thee's" and "thou's" and of course the I Do (NOT I will)

Thats interesting, because our minister was very insistant on promising "I Will" because I do is more of a statement in the now. It made sense that its more a promise of forever, as opposed to right now.

 

[lurkyloo]

Thats interesting, because our minister was very insistant on promising "I Will" because I do is more of a statement in the now. It made sense that its more a promise of forever, as opposed to right now.

Just to play devil's advocate, you could also look at it as "I do" meaning that you are promising right then and there, not promising you "will" do it eventually some day in the future.

I just didn't like the sound of "I will" - it struck me as being different for different's sake. But then I'm also the nut who thought that repeating our vows after the pastor instead of reading them straight through would sound insincere and brainwashed!

 

[sungela]

Just to play devil's advocate, you could also look at it as "I do" meaning that you are promising right then and there, not promising you "will" do it eventually some day in the future.

I just didn't like the sound of "I will" - it struck me as being different for different's sake. But then I'm also the nut who thought that repeating our vows after the pastor instead of reading them straight through would sound insincere and brainwashed!

I agree with Carrie about repeating after the officiant. I think it sounds like the pastor/rabbi is saying the vows. I memorized mine, and Angela had the rabbi prompt her in a whisper.

Ours were from the Book of Hosea, in Hebrew and in English:

I betroth you to me forever. I betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in loving-kindness and in compassion. I betroth you to me in faithfulness.

I figured if I wrote my own, I'd be a soppy mess, and it sucks when people can't understand the bride because she's crying too hard.

 

[alissa2008]

and most importantly, to think about buying him video games and Guinness beer, as long as the timing and budget are appropriate?

OMG I almost peed!

To guide each other, through dark times and bright? And that only one of you will freak out about finances at any given time?

Please don’t remove it, in times of anger, for they are fleeting, and our love is steadfast.”

I love that part too!!

I figured if I wrote my own, I'd be a soppy mess, and it sucks when people can't understand the bride because she's crying too hard.

hahaha Sunny - I hear ya on that one!!

 

[purplegirl247]

Well, you know, we wanted to make the vows *ours*.

As for the rings reference, I wrote that specifically because we know a married couple who takes their rings off WHENEVER they aren't getting along (which, as an aside, is like twice a week. *sighs*). It struck me as really disrespectful because when you're married, you're married. Period. It isn't something you're trying out. You're not test-driving your spouse. You can't return him to the Husbands 'R Us store for an upgraded model, y'know? Leave your freaking ring on!

P.S. I love "delight" and "astound" in your vow, alissa!

 

[alissa2008]

Well, you know, we wanted to make the vows *ours*.

As for the rings reference, I wrote that specifically because we know a married couple who takes their rings off WHENEVER they aren't getting along (which, as an aside, is like twice a week. *sighs*). It struck me as really disrespectful because when you're married, you're married. Period. It isn't something you're trying out. You're not test-driving your spouse. You can't return him to the Husbands 'R Us store for an upgraded model, y'know? Leave your freaking ring on!

P.S. I love "delight" and "astound" in your vow, alissa!

haha, thanks! And I know EXACTLY what you mean-- good analogy too! I don't even take my engagement ring off - unless I'm using heavy cleaners or playing with raw meat... seriously, you're committed to each other - taking your wedding ring off makes me sick!!

 

[Ember]

haha, thanks! And I know EXACTLY what you mean-- good analogy too! I don't even take my engagement ring off - unless I'm using heavy cleaners or playing with raw meat... seriously, you're committed to each other - taking your wedding ring off makes me sick!!

And when your eczema acts up on your hands.... I hate not wearing my rings, and always feel bad, but the rash is made worse by my rings when it happens.

 

[chell]

We wrote our own but we will be doing more traditional vows during the usual part of the ceremony. After the pronouncement we will do our special vows. That's what our Pastor recommended. I think that was his nice way of saying my vows were WAY too long.