How do you handle stress?

[linnylu]

I am just so stressed out right now. My oldest is graduating from high school and wants a large grad party. I just look at all the work involved-cleaning the house, readying the yard, planning the menu........ My 8th grader has a huge project due Wednesday. He hasn't started and left all notes needed for the assignment at school. He has track and baseball tomorrow evening and a track meet Tuesday. I told him he can't go to those but then he is letting down a team. Our house is a mess. My marriage is a mess. Sorry for the whining, but really I just want to know how to deal with the stress.

 

[Uncle Remus]

I am just so stressed out right now. My oldest is graduating from high school and wants a large grad party. I just look at all the work involved-cleaning the house, readying the yard, planning the menu........ My 8th grader has a huge project due Wednesday. He hasn't started and left all notes needed for the assignment at school. He has track and baseball tomorrow evening and a track meet Tuesday. I told him he can't go to those but then he is letting down a team. Our house is a mess. My marriage is a mess. Sorry for the whining, but really I just want to know how to deal with the stress.

Have the grad party at a local park, make it a picnic.

Eighth grader is outta luck, let him hustle to get his assignment done Mon 'n Tues nights.

Clean a li'l of the house, make good use of that senior 'n 8th grader.

And

 

[MushyMushy]

Better living through chemistry. I like Xanax and wine.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I am just so stressed out right now. My oldest is graduating from high school and wants a large grad party. I just look at all the work involved-cleaning the house, readying the yard, planning the menu........ My 8th grader has a huge project due Wednesday. He hasn't started and left all notes needed for the assignment at school. He has track and baseball tomorrow evening and a track meet Tuesday. I told him he can't go to those but then he is letting down a team. Our house is a mess. My marriage is a mess. Sorry for the whining, but really I just want to know how to deal with the stress.

1) No grad party for child unless he/she cleans the house.

2) 8th grader has to suffer the consequences of doing work at the last minute. Yes, he is going to be letting the team down. That is called consequences. School work comes first.

3) If your marriage is a mess and you want to sort yourself out, pick up the phone and make an appointment to see a counselor tomorrow.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

It sounds like you have too much going on in your life to even consider throwing a big party. How about making it a potluck at a local park? Have your son type up a flyer to give to his friends with the date, time and list of items/dishes needed. Let him coordinate the replies. Let your son and his friends scout around for a good picnic spot, or maybe a local pool or cabana club. If it needs to be reserved, you could help him with that. Otherwise, leave the details to him and take the load off yourself.

As for the 8th grader, it's time for some tough love. He was the one who procrastinated so he'll have to figure out how to the get the project done and take the consequences if he doesn't.

It's very difficult to take the focus off of our kids sometimes and focus on ourselves. But you need to do it once in a while to make yourself an even more effective parent.

 

[Disney Doll]

When I hit a busy period, I generally take some time to sit down and write down everything I have to do. Then I look at the list and decide what is "imperative" and what can slide.

 

[wdwmom0f3]

I'm with you on the stress thing. I have one about to graduate and I am throwing her a small party just before graduation, and we are leaving for Disney right after. On top of that, I have two others involved in cheer & soccer plus DD18 is stressing me to the max.

What I have been doing is trying to do things for me. I have been working in the yard, having a glass of wine, and planning this Disney trip. If I focus on all of the stresses in my life I would be dead. I have realized that I am not in control, God is, so I turn it all over to Him, and I just do what I can.

As for the party thing, I took the stress away by having some of it catered. I will do the simple things, and I have a friend coming to help me as well as my mother. We are having a simple get together, nothing fancy. Now with the cleaning, I would make a list and divide and conquer. Give each person a responsibility and have them do it. When I am in a pinch, this is what I do. Then I go behind them and make sure it's done.

As for the school work, that comes first to me. He would be missing whatever it was to get that finished especially since he had plenty of time to do it.

to you! Maybe a night out alone or a weekend away after graduation is just what you need to get your marriage back on track. We do this a lot, and it really does help.

 

[daisyduck123]

First, calm down, take a breath, & try to relax.

1) About a grad party....DD16 is graduating too. We are going to do a party with close family & friends....no large party here. It's just too much work. Our house could easily hold over 100 people, but that doesn't mean I have to invite everyone she knows. I would just worry about cleaning the main level of the house. Mine is quite large, but I can get it cleaned in one evening if I work at it. I think you should get your DD to help you.

I am planning to have DH at the grill, & having a barbecue...burgers, dogs, etc. The menu is rather easy.

Another idea is to have it catered. We actually may end up going that route. In January, when DD16 was released from a 9 week hospital stay, we had an open house so that friends/family could come visit with her. We catered that for only about $400.00.

2) I have a middle schooler too. He is on his own with projects.

Good luck & happy graduation to your DD!

 

[marcyinPA]

Short answer: I eat.

 

[Magic Mom]

Better living through chemistry. I like Xanax and wine.

I perfer Celexa and Corona....but the end result is the same.

 

[Art 1]

Rum and Coke.

But on a serious note, you need to pick yourself and and get the house cleaned up for a start. All that clutter does you no good and brings you down. Get confident, do what needs to be done and get going. Get some goals, make a list and check it off. Turn the computer and TV off and get going.

 

[malibuconlee]

Well, the 8th grader needs to figure out how to manage their commitments. Tell him to figure it out.

The senior wanting a party, it's getting a bit late to plan, isn't it? Can still happen tho. Pick a time and get the invites out. He's responsible for helping to get ready and clean up. Otherwise, no go. Or see if you can get a community center, or church basement/hall?

Make a list of what HAS to be done, and number it by date/importance it needs to be done. After that add to the list things you want to do. Just keep plugging away at it. This is what my DH does every day at work. It works for him.

 

[powellrj]

For the graduate, we just did an open house at our church. It was easy because I just made deli trays and hot sandwiches in crock-pots and pulled it off for not very much money. Costco cakes are great budget/time savers too!

8th grader is on his own. He needs to learn time management now!

For the house, divide it up and assign tasks. I told my middle DS if he had a yard sale he could keep all the money so he is really wanting to clean out the attic and garage. DH and I cleaned out our closets so that little job is done and hopefully he will have his yard sale soon the garage and attic are clean too!

Everyday housework can just be assigned and kept up that way. Make a certain time house cleaning time, ours is Friday night and everyone pitches in.

 

[frijolefrito]

CHIN UP bright eyes! Look you are doing an awesome thing throwing a grad party. I wish I had mom who would do that!!! It's hard work and even if you kids don't say it they appreciate it and will look back on these memories fondly. If you need menu ideas Pizza, BBQ hot dogs, or sandwiches.

We all got highs or lows in our marriage. Why not plan a Friday night just you and him. Go out to eat or do something cool like go to a pool bar. You can even find a bar on a Wednesday night and get some wings, drink some beer, maybe watch a sport you could care less about. If it's something more serious go to counseling but if your husband’s anything like me you'll take that as insult. If he does than talk to him about what's going on and have him talk to you. Make some compromises move on.

Your son is doing something typical of summer fever. He's already dreaming of vacation it's natural he messes up. If he lets down his team that's a lesson he's going to have to learn. You do school first! None of this is your fault and your kid(s) are humans and can forget thing.

Either way you'll live through all of this and no matter what happens you'll be ok.

 

[low-key]

Sounds like you got a lot on your plate. I like a real hard work out or brew a pot of coffee and just relax in front of your computer

 

[jlewisinsyr]

I let it roll off my back, I don't get stressed, I look at a problem or situation and think through all the ways to work through it and put my head down and get it done.

I've had major projects dropped on my desk at 5:00 PM due by 8:00 AM the next morning, and I'll just take a deep breath, analyze what needs to be done and just put my head down and do it (I normally work 8:00 AM - 4:30 PM).

Impossible is not an answer although failure is always a possibility. But you cannot fail if you never try, and you will never succeed if you fear failure.