How do you feel about this?

[BamaFan121s]

You understood perfectly. I do see the other point though and that is, we all eat in public, but we don't pee in public. So that can be an argument to my point. Of course I know what the primary function is. But basically, some people feel uncomfortable seeing it. I am a person who thinks basically it is okay, but still when I see it I am uncomfortable. I feel the need to "look away". What if the mom thinks I am staring. Heck, a breast that might be partially exposed is almost asking for men to look. We can't help it. We know it's out for feeding a baby but it is an innate reaction and so we have to feel wrong when we happen to see it. That's really all there is too it. I don't want to feel uncomfortable. If there is a good place provided, then use it. If not, then be discrete.

You and I are on the same page...well, except for the whole 'being a man' part.

 

[Princess Amy]

DisneyNewBee, I couldn't agree with you more.

Nursing is just that, nursing your infant. Using the breast for any other reason, i.e. comfort or to keep quiet, is quite sick and wrong. If that was the case, my fiance would love to do that to be comforted I understand you get a bond with your child from the closeness. But once they reach a certain age children could care less. They are up and about bouncing around. I think the parents get too attached to that bond and try to hold onto it for too long.

 

[frayedend]

You and I are on the same page...well, except for the whole 'being a man' part.

I have an idea for a new rule that will help me out. It will at least minimize the amount of breast feeding to only the necessary (screaming hungry kid, 3 lands away from baby center). What do you think...

"Each party found breastfeeding in public areas will be charged one Child Credit on the Disney Dining Plan."

 

[vatmark]

Using the breast for comfort is no different then using a bottle for comfort. I have seen plenty of bottle feeding mothers give their kid a bottle to quiet them down. I have seen plenty of 2 and 3 year olds walking around with a bottle...not using it for nourishment but using it for comfort.

Annie

 

[CowboyCO]

My DW BF both our boys until until about 18 months. DS1 was a preemie, born at 30 weeks and DS2 was a regular term baby. I have no problem with public BF of babies and infants.

BF of Kindergartners, however, or pre-schoolers is a little much. After 18 months, the Mother is getting more out of breastfeeding than the kid is. I'm not judging, I just don't want to see it.

Let's face it, if a child can ask for it using a complete and well-structured sentence, that it a little much!

 

[frayedend]

Using the breast for comfort is no different then using a bottle for comfort. I have seen plenty of bottle feeding mothers give their kid a bottle to quiet them down. I have seen plenty of 2 and 3 year olds walking around with a bottle...not using it for nourishment but using it for comfort.

Annie

I'm not advocating breastfeeding a toddler. I think it's just messed up. But I guess something that backs up your point here is a pacifier/binky. Many kids use them up to 3 or so.

But then again, I got my kids off of it by saying...yes you can buy that toy but it costs your binky. My sons both gave the cashier the pacifier and they never seemed to miss it.

 

[vatmark]

But then again, I got my kids off of it by saying...yes you can buy that toy but it costs your binky. My sons both gave the cashier the pacifier and they never seemed to miss it.

I did the exact same thing with my son. I thought it would be a fight for him to give it up. He even remembers giving his pacifier up to get the fire station to his wooden train set.

Annie

 

[frayedend]

I did the exact same thing with my son. I thought it would be a fight for him to give it up. He even remembers giving his pacifier up to get the fire station to his wooden train set.

Annie

I was so amazed at how well it worked. They did ask for it later that day and I said, no, here is your toy you bought with it. They were fine with that. I was so expecting a long hard battle. That was one of the few things that was easy with both of my boys.

 

[BamaFan121s]

Geez....I've heard horror stories about parents trying to get pacifiers away from their kids. DD never had one, so I lucked out on that one. But I'll make you really jealous...we got her off a bottle at 13 months in 1 NIGHT and she NEVER wanted one or cried for it again. Luckily for us, she thought drinking out of a straw was the coolest thing in the world and far preferred that.

 

[BamaFan121s]

oops..double post

 

[vatmark]

DD was a thumbsucker. I knowthey say that some kids just stop on their own. Not her. When she was 5 I said enough was enough. They actually make this thing that kids wear on their thumb and then part of it goes around their wrist and you use one of those hospital type bands to secure it this way they can't get it off. Cost me $65 but worked like a charm. She would not wear it to Kindergarten because she would not suck her thumb in front of other kids for fear of mocking but soon as she got home she had to put it on and also wear it to bed. She could still do most everything with it on except suck her thumb. Didn't take long at all for her to stop.

Annie

 

[robinb]

Nursing is just that, nursing your infant. Using the breast for any other reason, i.e. comfort or to keep quiet, is quite sick and wrong.

You act as if the breast is just a substitute bottle instead of the other way around. You are entitled to your opinion, but many people in world would disagree with you. Obviously, I don't feel it is "sick and wrong" and such judgmental words can get you in trouble here on the DIS. Such talk is treading very close to a personal attack.

And for those of you who wonder about the independence of a child who nurses past the magic age of 6-18 months ... you don't need to worry about my DD on that front! She is Ms. Independent. Children of parents who practiced Attachment Parenting (google it) are usually very independent.

Lastly, I want to address the issue of exactly who gets the most out of nursing after a certain age (fill in your favorite). I believe that nursing is a two person agreement that can be stopped when either the mom or the baby wants to stop. You can't force a mom to nurse and you can't force a child to nurse.

 

[Bird-Mom]

You act as if the breast is just a substitute bottle instead of the other way around. You are entitled to your opinion, but many people in world would disagree with you. Obviously, I don't feel it is "sick and wrong" and such judgmental words can get you in trouble here on the DIS. Such talk is treading very close to a personal attack.

And for those of you who wonder about the independence of a child who nurses past the magic age of 6-18 months ... you don't need to worry about my DD on that front! She is Ms. Independent. Children of parents who practiced Attachment Parenting (google it) are usually very independent.

Lastly, I want to address the issue of exactly who gets the most out of nursing after a certain age (fill in your favorite). I believe that nursing is a two person agreement that can be stopped when either the mom or the baby wants to stop. You can't force a mom to nurse and you can't force a child to nurse.

Well said robinb! My older dd weaned when she was 2 (although she did ask to nurse a few times after her sister was born). She is incredibly independant. She ran off to school on her third birthday without so much as a goodbye, let alone a tear. She is very well adjusted and independant. My 2 year old (26 months and going strong) is even more independant. Everything is "Ronnie do it!!!"

To those who say is it sick, disgusting, offensive...if you haven't done it, you truly do not understand. It is fine to have your own opinions, but it is not fair to be judgemental of others who disagree with those opinions.

 

[disneynewbee]

Using the breast for comfort is no different then using a bottle for comfort. I have seen plenty of bottle feeding mothers give their kid a bottle to quiet them down. I have seen plenty of 2 and 3 year olds walking around with a bottle...not using it for nourishment but using it for comfort.

Annie

I just want to say I don't think offering a bottle or breast to comfort an injured child is ok. I stated in my first post that being a bottle feeding mommy I do not offer my kids bottles when upset, I offer them hugs. Whether it is breast or bottle I don't think it is ok to offer either for comfort. Now if you are giving it to them to quiet them down because they are hungry that is different that is what the breast and bottle are for. My argument is kids should not be offered food simply for comfort reguardless if it comes from the breast or bottle.

 

[Disfan3]

why are there so many people with the words 'discreet' and 'whipping it out there"
in the posts??

I would conclude these are people who have never nursed or even knew a nursing mother. Whipping it out never came to mind when I would feed my children at home or anywhere else.

 

[kvogel11202]

Oh my goodness! First let me say that I weaned my first breast-fed baby at 12 months of age and am currently bf a 6 month old. I plan to bf him until he's 18 months old or until he self-weans. I've never bf a child after my milk was gone but...... LOL! Nursing a child for comfort is NOT A SEXUAL ACT! I've never heard of anything so far out there before in my life!! I'm not sure whether to laugh or to feel bad for people with such views. Sure - I find the idea of bf a 3 year old uncomfortable for me to do personally but to accuse the mother of getting sexual satisfaction out such an act proves your ignorance beyond a doubt!!!!


Let me clarify this- I don't care how long you breast FEED your child, but if you are no longer FEEDING the child, just letting them suck away like it was a pacifier, that is what is sick. Feed away, feed till the cows come home, but if you are no longer producing any milk that is "nature" telling you enough, and after all, isn't that the rally cry of the "Breastfeeding Brigade"? It's the "natural" way to go? please, exercise some reason. So as far as my being sick for asking about this- that's too bad, it is sick to have a child attached to you for no reason other than a mother can't let go and just give the kid a hug.

 

[Bird-Mom]

And I am sorry if you feel it is your business how I raise my child and what I tell them. Who are you to tell me that is all my 5 y.o. needs to hear?!?

Maybe you missed my post where I said that if I wasn't comfortable around it, I would leave instead of causing a scene (regardless to who was right in the situation). Preaching from others as to how I should feel isn't going to change my mind, sorry. I thought walking away from it if I wasn't comfortable was better than being an a** about it.

I'm not telling you how to raise your child. I just really do not understand why you would feel uncomfortable with a simple explanation which is all any 5 year old needs to hear. If you feel more comfortable with a book to teach her, that is fine. If you feel better skipping the whole thing, that is your choice. As an educator, it is my experience that it is very effective to take advantage of life situations as great teaching tools, tailoring the explanation to the age level. Five year olds are great with simple explanations; they will tell you if they want more.

Just wondering how you, or any mother who is uncomfortable with breastfeeding, will feel if your daughter or daughter in law breastfeeds? (And I am the daughter of a woman who felt like this, so it is completely possible)

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

Wow! I think that a 2 year old bf child still "needs" to bf. 2 year olds are still so young. Yes, they aren't going to starve if they aren't bf every 2 hours like an infant, but they still NEED to be bf. It's more than a hunger thing when the child gets to be about 24 months.



I have NEVER seen a bf 4 year old "clamouring and making a scene trying to pull mom's boo-bah out". Unless you've experienced bf a 4 year old (and I have), then please leave ridiculous comments like this out of this (almost) respectful bf thread. A 4 year old can wait to bf, and usually prefers to bf in private. I don't know where people get this idea that a child over the age of 15 months runs over to mom, pulls her shirt off, unhooks her bra, and demands to nurse. Yes, a young toddler will sometimes get demanding to nurse if it's naptime or there's been a problem (like getting hurt). But a 4 year old who still nurses has learned the give-and-take of nursing and will not assault mom at any given moment just so he can nurse!

Mary

Sorry not so ridiculous Mary.

My moms friend refuses to go anywhere in public with her Daughter in law and granddaughter. The child is almost 5 and will nurse ANYWHERE! When she says she is thirsty, its not a juice box that she wants.

If the mother says not now, she pulls at the moms shirt and yells I'm thirsty until she gives in. It's embarassing for the grandma. She had no problem when the child was younger, but I have to agree that if I seen this in a public place I would stare and shake my head too.

I also have no problem BF'ing in public an infant or small toddler and I bottlefed both my children. But when the children are older it should be done in private.

JMOP!

 

[Bird-Mom]

Let me clarify this- I don't care how long you breast FEED your child, but if you are no longer FEEDING the child, just letting them suck away like it was a pacifier, that is what is sick. Feed away, feed till the cows come home, but if you are no longer producing any milk that is "nature" telling you enough, and after all, isn't that the rally cry of the "Breastfeeding Brigade"? It's the "natural" way to go? please, exercise some reason. So as far as my being sick for asking about this- that's too bad, it is sick to have a child attached to you for no reason other than a mother can't let go and just give the kid a hug.

Why is it sick? What are you afraid of? I can only go by my own experience which is that my milk, to the best of my knowledge, dried up sometime around 17 weeks of pregnancy. Maybe I am wrong and I still did have milk; my dd has speech problems and could not tell me although I did ask her. My dd nursed until 28 weeks of pregnancy. I was certainly producing colostrum, which is still nutrition, and it was my wish for my child to decide when she was done nursing. Believe me when I say it was uncomfortable and really hurt sometimes, but it was important to her, so I let her decide. I refused to start a pacifier for her at such a late age. I actually did attempt to give her a pacifier at 6 months old when we took her first plane trip, and she spat it out, looking at me like what the heck is that? Children have sucking needs way past infancy, so what is the problem if it is sucking at the breast? I can tell you what the problem is...it is a puritanical streak in our culture where people make judgements that we are sick, digusting, offensive, dirty, -insert your favorite adjective here- for nursing past the age of -insert your comfort level here- months.

Many years ago I was a language teacher. I also taught the culture of the languages. Because some of the traditions were unheard of to my students, they would often say things like, gross, stupid, weird, wrong, offensive, sick, disgusting. I would not stand for that in my classroom. Just because it is not familiar to you or within your comfort level does not make it gross, stupid, werid, wrong, offensive, sick or disgusting. Let's just call it different.

So, if you don't like my extended breastfeeding and doing it in public, just call me different. Let's have some tolerance for those who do things differently than you would choose.

Edited to add that with the exception of milk drying up while pregnant due to hormonal changes, most mothers do have milk even when they think it is gone. Making milk is a supply and demand process. It doesn't just dry up if the demand is still there. The breast goes through many changes, and when nursing just a few times/day and the demand is lessend, the breast may shrink, not feel as heavy, not leak or have a let-down sensation. Since we are so used to our breasts doing these things, when we don't have let-down, leaking or notice we are shrinkning, we may think nothing is there when indeed it probably is.

 

[flortlebap]

After 18 months, the Mother is getting more out of breastfeeding than the kid is. I'm not judging, I just don't want to see it.

I'm curious as to what you base this opinion on. There has been extensive research proving the benefits of breast milk until 2 years plus (which is why the WHO recommend AT LEAST TWO YEARS BREASTFEEDING!) and proof that humans are designed to be fed for 4 or 5 years.