Homeschool Thread---you can debate, but BE NICE!!

[brermomof2]

I used to have a negative view about homeschooling. I was an educator - have taught 8th grade language arts, third grade and first grade. About 15 years ago, my uncle's wife decided to homeschool their children. She had a HS degree and I was fresh out of college teaching, and I think I felt offended that she thought she had the ability to teach her children as well as a "real" teacher. Well, she did an exceptional job. Her children graduated early and earned scholarships for college. What I was most impressed with was what good kids they were. This may have been the case regardless, but there are so many influences at public and private schools to protect your kids from. I remember many in the family saying those kids wouldn't be prepared for the "real world". Absolutely not true. They are functioning extremely well. My other uncle's kids, in the same small Wisconsin town, went to public school. One girl got pregnant in HS, got married and is now a beautician, but wishes she could have gone to college with the rest of her friends. Another girl ended up doing drugs. The youngest girl is doing OK. Their son has turned out well and is a pilot. I think the two older girls gave into a lot of the peer pressure kids experience. I think there are good and bad examples of homeschooling, just as there are good and bad examples of public or private schooling. I am glad we have the choice. If a parent is really committed to doing it for the right reasons, and is prepared for the responsibility and hard work, then it can be a wonderful experience. For selfish reasons I wanted to keep my DS(6) home with me. While I thought I could teach him just as well, if not better because of one on one, I wanted him to have the chance to make friends and experience being in a classroom. He is in kdg and loves school. Now with my DD(15), a freshman in HS, I have thought about homeschooling because of all the crap she tells me goes on there. I just keep praying that she continues to make good choices. There is so much offered at her HS that I could not give her. She wants to be an architect and they have excellent drafting and engineering classes offered at her HS. Good luck to all you homeschoolers.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I guess I'm just shocked this one hasn't turned into a fight yet

What path and why did you choose your desired path of education for your child?

I guess I homeschooled my kids for awhile up until Kindergarten, given the number of Homeschooled Preschoolers I see on the DIS. I must admit I don't get it. Around here I don't know of anybody who would consider my 2 year old Homeschooled. We just call it "coloring with Mommy."

My other kids have been in mixtures of Private and Public schools. They are both in Private schools right now (5th and 9th grades). When my youngest reachest Preschool age I will most likely sign him up for a Montessori type Preschool and then enroll him in Private Elementary School.

Right now I wouldn't send either of my older kids to our local Public School. Especially my 5th grader who would have a 20% chance of ending up in the 5th Grade classroom that has been relegated to a windowless room that used to be a storage closet off of the cafeteria. The classrooms are overcrowded, discipline is non-existent, and the teachers in that building are mostly the ones who were unable to get jobs in other schools. Test scores are plummeting. In all honesty I would Homeschool him before I would send him there. Thankfully, I got him onto the waitlist at the local Private School early last year and a spot opened up for him.

Do you consider yourself against the other options? If yes, then why?

I'm not against other options, but I do know of some people that I don't feel are doing their kids any favors. In all fairness though I also know of a few Homeschoolers who are succeeding quite well.

Do you support the choice to pick an option?

Partially. I would like to see States do more to require testing to ensure that kids are progressing at acceptable rates. My son's Private school allows Homeschooled kids to come in and take the Terra Novas during the testing week. My personal opinion is that most reasonable Teaching parents should participate in some kind of benchmark check, just to insure that their children are on the right track.

As far as a degree. I think that most people with a High School education can probably teach their kids in younger elementary school fairly decently. Beyond that, I guess everybody has the right to do make the decision for their own children, but I would never allow anybody without a college degree the responsibility of teaching my kids.

 

[Jenn Lynn]

Hi,
I'm reading these threads for future reference as I've always thought about homeschooling my kids in the future. One quick question, would one of you please explain what "tumbling" is when you refer to it as a socialisation activity? I've never heard of it before, maybe we call it something different in the UK? Thanks!

Tumbling is kind of like gymnastics for little kids. More like the floor exercise you see in competitions.

We are probably going to send DD to parochial school. DH went to public school his whole life and I went to parochial through 8th and then public HS. I felt the school I went to kept us on track academically. They offered advanced math classes. I found my 9th grade Bio. class to be the same as what I learned in 8th. I never felt behind academically. Socially I had a harder time adjusting, but I think it was mostly my personality.

We have decided on parochial school for the class sizes and the learning environment. I also think less BS is tolerated in the school and problems are delt with in a more timely manner. Not all of the hoops to jump through. This school does have sports teams although they are small. And they have art classes and choir. I'm not sure about band though.

For me homeschooling would be a last resort because it is not something I really WANT to take on. But I know I could if it came down to it.

 

[MommyPoppins]

Playing devil's advocate: Why shouldn't homeschooling parents be required to have at least a bachelor's degree and take continuing education courses if teachers are required to do so? It couldn't hurt.

Shouldn't homeschooling kids be subjected to social worker visits to ensure that they are meeting school requirements, instead of waiting until the end of the school year to submit work samples? If the work is not being done, a whole year could be lost.

There are just some places in life where "big brother" just doesn't have a right to be. Subjecting your children and family to visits from a social worker is just asking for trouble. No one should have the right to tell you that you can't teach your children yourself unless you are educated to do so. Thank God this is America and this isn't a issue. It goes against American's "rights".
American's have rights and you can't start taking those rights away from people.
I have the right to an attorney, I have the right to have as many children as I'd like, I have the right to bear arms(I have two of them. ) and thank goodness I also have the right to decide which type of education is best for my own children who nobody else knows but me.

I was homeschooled from 2nd grade through graduation. I chose not to go to college, I wanted to marry my love and have a family. Which we have sucessfully done. Now I am going to homeschool my own children. My oldest will be starting this school year. I turned out socialized and purdy smart. I begged and begged my parents to let me go to school and they never gave in. I am SOOOOOOOOO thankful for that. I am going to homeschool for the same reasons my parents homeschooled me. # 1 is because I am their mother, and if they are with someone else most of the day whose influence is teaching them. It sure isn't mine. Do you realize the kind of language that highschool teachers use in front of your children! I guess that's THEIR right, but I'm not subjecting my children to that. I look at my boys and then I look out the window at the kids who go to school. They are screaming down the street at their parents, saying words my husband and I don't even use and they sure aren't acting like 5,6 and 7 year olds. I DO NOT want that for my kids. Our biggest reason for not sending our children to school is for religious reasons. What they would be taught in school would go against what we try and teach them at home. And again, I have the right to be religious...and by golly I don't even have to hide in the closet to teach my children God's Word. Besides, where we live my kids would have to learn spanish just to survive in school because no one speaks english.

 

[Crankyshank]

. Do you realize the kind of language that highschool teachers use in front of your children! I guess that's THEIR right, but I'm not subjecting my children to that. I look at my boys and then I look out the window at the kids who go to school. They are screaming down the street at their parents, saying words my husband and I don't even use and they sure aren't acting like 5,6 and 7 year olds. I DO NOT want that for my kids.

Children can pick up curse words and naughty phrases from lots of other places other than school. I picked up choice ones from the kids at the Y.
I have never heard a teacher use inappropriate language in front of a child. Not in my experience, nor has it happened to any of my friends or family members, so please do not state that it is a common occurrence as your statement implies.

 

[Planogirl]

Children can pick up curse words and naughty phrases from lots of other places other than school. I picked up choice ones from the kids at the Y.
I have never heard a teacher use inappropriate language in front of a child. Not in my experience, nor has it happened to any of my friends or family members, so please do not state that it is a common occurrence as your statement implies.

I agree. Our son has picked up a few choice words from fellow classmates but I expect that. I do not expect it from teachers and have never heard of such a thing.

 

[danacara]

I'm going to snip out one of the more vanilla things I said yesterday and paste it here. I think it's pretty much objective and in the spirit of non-meanness.

I'm sure homeschooling parents care about their children very deeply. I'm sure they are generally very good parents. But I think in parental arrogance, or perhaps in a search to supplement one's parental identity, they mess with fire, because I don't think the average homeschooling mom does as worthy a job as the average accredited teacher. Are there exceptions? Plenty. There are stratospherically good homeschooling moms, and there are crappy accredited teachers, but there's also a safety net with formal schooling - the kids get new teachers every year. And if mom is blowing it - and if mom is too arrogant or too out of it to tell that she's blowing it - the kid inherits a lifetime of educational damage. This is especially true in math, where - let's face it - you can't teach it if you don't know it, and most homeschooling moms don't know it. To stay "one lesson ahead" is grossly insufficient. Would you be alright with a professional teacher who was just one lesson ahead, if you knew about it?

Are there exceptions? Absolutely. There's one lady on this board who teaches advanced chemistry to homeschoolers, she impresses the heck out of me, in all honesty. But I just think the possibility for abject failure with homeschooling is dangerously, dangerously high, and when you combine that with the "I am the devoted mother I know, I am backed by the love of the Lord, and I homeschool because I am superior to moms who do not" ego trip --- it's nearly impossible for that woman to see when things are going off the cliff.

 

[dturner]

This is the 3rd year of homeschooling for us.

I happen to live in probably one of the most relaxed states for homeschooling -Texas. We are only required to teach reading, writing, math, spelling and good citizenship although I teach everything a normal PS would teach using a secular curriculum. There are no end of year exams, no paperwork to turn in (although I do keep everything we do in a binder and keep grades in the computer).

I'm glad that we have the right to teach our children at home.

I plan on homeschooling through HS, although I may sign DS up for one of those charter schools on the internet once we get to the HS level.

 

[meandtheguys2]

OK...what the heck is good citizenship?

 

[dairyou]

We have been homeschooling now for 4 years. The reason why started with my youngest. His second grade teacher pulled me aside and said he had ADD. This is in private Christian school. I was a regular mom in his class and didn't understand why she was saying this. There were many other kids that were far worse than my son. After speaking to previous teachers, teachers that knew my son on a personal level, and more importantly his doctor, they all said no he didn't. I went back to this particular teacher and she didn't believe me. A week later I stayed in his class and she started to treat my son on a meaner level. We pulled him out right then and there. We didn't want her comments on my son's school records so future teachers could prejudge him. My oldest son decided he would homeschool also.

Fast forward to now. We homeschool for different reasons now. Protecting their innocence as long as possible. My oldest would be in Jr. High. I think this is the hardest year to send back to school. It's just difficult to be a teenager!

My kids are doing well. Both are 2 grade levels above the school system. They socialize more than they did before. The level of socialization they have is mostly all good.

Believe me, there are times I want to send them back. It is a year to year decision. Any time they want to go back they are free to. I am not against public school. I think both sides have good and bad. It comes down to what is best for YOUR family

Deb

 

[MommyPoppins]

Children can pick up curse words and naughty phrases from lots of other places other than school. I picked up choice ones from the kids at the Y.
I have never heard a teacher use inappropriate language in front of a child. Not in my experience, nor has it happened to any of my friends or family members, so please do not state that it is a common occurrence as your statement implies.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to be a universal thing. I only know from my experince with famliy and friends HERE that it happens and it shouldn't. And yes, kids can pick up bad words from other places and it's every parents right to let their kids be a part of things(activities, TV, whatever the case may be) or to not let their kids be a part of things. We let our children play with the neighborhood kids(If we didn't bad things would mysteriously start happening to our home) and everytime they play with them we have issues. That is not to say that we hide our children in our home and not let them out.

 

[Crankyshank]

To answer the OP:

What path and why did you choose your desired path of education for your child? I haven't any kids yet, but this is something DH and I have discussed.
I plan on sending my child to public elementary school because the local elementary school is top notch. DH is adament about not wanting his children to go to parochial school. He's not Catholic and that would probably give his mother about 10 cases of the wiggins if her grandchild went to one. since the local elementary school is ranked an A-, I'll give in.
I want my child to go to Moses Brown or Providence Country Day, which starts at 6th grade and goes through 12th. Moses Brown is a quaker school. PCD is a prep school. If that's not an option, then it depends on the child.

Do you consider yourself against the other options? If yes, then why? other option as in regular public school? My child will not be homeschooled. Period. I don't think I'm capable of educating my child full time better than local schools. I will supplement my child's education though, because learning doesn't end with the school bell

Do you support the choice to pick an option? Yes, but I personally think there should be much stricter guidelines when it comes to homeschooling.

 

[dturner]

OK...what the heck is good citizenship?

Copied from the Texas Homeschooling Wesbite:

The Tarrant County judge who ruled in the Leeper v. Arlington ISD case that home schools were indeed legal in Texas also required that students who were taught at home use a curriculum from any source that covered the “basic educational goals of reading, spelling, grammar, math and a course in good citizenship.” He used the language of good citizenship because it was in the compulsory attendance statute that exempted students from public school if they were going to a private school. The judge determined that such a course was a civics course or a study of government.

 

[JennyMominRI]

"I am the devoted mother I know, I am backed by the love of the Lord, and I homeschool because I am superior to moms who do not" ego trip --- .

There are homeschoolers out there that are like this..I know.I've dealt with them,but please don't think that most of us are religious fanatics with one goal..Indoctrinating our kids in our beliefs.
I'm a non-Christian homeschooler and I'm not alone.
As for the Math issue.. You are right..Math is NOT my strong suit..This is why I used a very strict Saxon curriculum.. I must have done something right because one of my kids who is back in school is in the advanced class and the other is in the average one.
I am not confident that I could teach my kids high school level academics. This is why 2 are back in school this year,and the other 2 will go back next year..Some parents may be more than capable. I *know* my own limitations

 

[Becky2005]

What path and why did you choose your desired path of education for your child? I send my kids to the local public school

Do you consider yourself against the other options? If yes, then why? Nope, I'm not against any option. Each child is different and what works for one may not work for another.

Do you support the choice to pick an option? Yes, although I'm not 100% sure of all the regulations but each choice should be held to the same standards (I guess that would have to include standardized testing somehow then) so that people can't just *say* they are homeschooling but aren't. KWIM?

I had actually considered homeschooling since I had heard so many horror stories of public schools in general (even though I went to a public school and had no problems), DH went to a Christian private school and basically told me in no uncertain terms, our kids would NOT be doing that (and he's a Christian even but the curriculium wasn't good for him - he was kind of a smart mouthed teenager who was a bit advanced in some of the classes and was bored! He had 1 year at public school and loved it!).

This was all debated when DD was little - THEN I tried to teach her to tie her shoes and that was when I decided there was no way I could teach my own kids. I get *way* too frustrated with them and have no patience among other reasons. So, off she went to the local public schools. Ours is really good, community oriented it's like a big extended family.

My DD is a pretty average student so the regular set-up of school is fine for her. Then along comes her brother and the set-up for school is hard for him in general but there are also some extra issues along the way. He has an IEP and they have done great with him. Not to mention we had some family issues a few years ago and the school secretaries were Godsends - they really helped us out a LOT!!! (OK, so that doesn't really have to do with education per se but I know I wouldn't have found out about a lot of the stuff if it weren't for them!).

Our church has a school attached to it (just started a couple years ago) and as members we could get a discount to go, etc... but even so I won't send them there for a couple reasons. One they don't have the resources my son needs plus it's a bit farther away than I would like to have to drive every day. LOL!

I have another one going off to Kindergarten next year and he will be going to the public school. He is actually already in preschool via special ed through the school system, so he will already have adjustments in place when he arrives in Kindergarten. (It's different issues than my older DS! LOL!!! One of them is speech therapy though and both my boys needed that! The older DS graduated out in 1st grade but I think my younger one is going to have a much longer time in speech!).

There's my oh about $1's worth. Everyone has to do what works for them. It's just one of those parenting decisions like everything else that can be debated (I've been on pregnancy boards and *every* decision seems to get debated (how to feed your child, how to diaper your child, how to put your child to bed (i.e. crying it out or not), work/stay-home, etc...))

 

[JennyMominRI]

To answer the OP:

.
I plan on sending my child to public elementary school because the local elementary school is top notch..

<waving> Two of my kids are in the Warwick Public School district..I'm very pleased with it so far
I'm not an anti-PSer,and I think that most teachers do a wonderful job.
I was simply not happy with the Public Schools in my school district in California

 

[cats7494]

I went to a private school from 1st grade through high school in Kansas City, MO. I know my mom and dad thought that was the best option but there were fewer opportunities for college scholarships. Let’s be honest….college sport scouts rarely go to private high school games.

I do not homeschool my DD11. Before I placed her in her current public school, I researched the school and it’s results… and I stand very proudly by my decision to place her there. The school is one of the highest in the state for test results; the teachers are required to attend many training sessions to continue their education; and they have wonderful activities for the students. (Sports, and other activities like… dd was chosen to be on a Leadership team this year, they have Kindergarten buddies that they read with once a week, they discuss social/current events … etc…)

I do understand why people homeschool their children but I do not believe that it is better than the education my dd11 receives. It is tiresome to hear people who do homeschool their children put down public education. Not all public school are equal...there are some excellent schools and there are some awful ones. I know many homeschooling parents do not put down public schools. Parents need to appreciate and respect the opinions and decisions of other parents.

We all want our children to be educated and we all believe we are doing what is best for our children...we all need to respect that!

 

[pamlet]

Now my questions:
What path and why did you choose your desired path of education for your child?

Do you consider yourself against the other options? If yes, then why?

Do you support the choice to pick an option?

Let me preface this by saying how you choose to have your children educated be it public, private or home is your choice. I have researched all options.

Well we had two paths for two boys... well one's a "man" now...
... DS (20) went to public school through 6th grade... started out there in 7th grade as well... Suddenly our VERY gregarious, social, school loving, happy boy was quiet, withdrawn, HATED going to school... generally TOTAL negative.. this happened within 1 month of starting middle school.. we talked to him... "nothing's wrong"... we talked to the school... "he seems fine while he's here - he's very bright, and seems to have friends"... I worked earlier than DH - and he dropped DS off at school every morning. He started noticing every morning DS was harrassed by "older kids" as soon as he was dropped off.. they seemed to surround any 7th grade boy as they were dropped off... clustering around them until the 7th graders got to the stairs to go down to where the 7th grade kids were to wait until the bell rang. Well to make a long story short - it comes out from DS friends that the group of "surrounders" are 8th graders shaking the younger guys down for their lunch money. DH goes to the vice principal who LITERALLY throws up her hands and says... "Look I've got 900 kids here, how can we watch all of them?". DH says - how 'bout if I volunteer to patrol in the mornings? Her response .. I'd have to take it to the board. Well suffice it to say .. DS didn't go back - we put him in a small Christian school where he BLOOMED! We never once have regretted taking him out of public school. We had talked of homeschooling, but I was working at a job that I loved, did NOT want to quit and the Christian school was such a wonderful fit for our son.

DS 15 - now that's a different story.. public school through 2nd grade.. moved him over to the Christian school. He was doing pretty well - but in 6th grade he was diagnosed with epilepsy. We've had a tough time getting his seizures under control. We LOVE our Christian school, but between DS having seizures, and being incredibly on again/off again "with it" due to medications... school work was VERY tough. If he had a seizure in class... he was shot for the next few hours... he was missing things left and right - he was in school all day.. then we were "re-doing" everything at night. He wasn't getting sleep because we would be up so late 're-teaching'. SO a year ago last Thanksgiving we pulled him out, I quit work and we embarked on our homeschool adventure! We're pretty "non traditional" in that school work is done afternoons, evenings and weekends. Also we may do a couple chapters over one weekend in order to have time to do other things during the week.

In no way would I ever question someone's choice in the way the educate their children. Some kids flourish in public school - some kids flourish in private school... my youngest is well I don't know about "flourishing" but he's certainly doing better at homeschooling than he was doing in a traditional school environment.

As to homeschooling an older child... Grammar/Lit are my strong suits.. I have a strong Biology curric. that I'm using.. DH does Math and History in the evening with him. To be honest this year my son does the Bio and health a lot on his own - with my checking, correcting. I'll follow up if he doesn't seem to "get it" but for the most part do not have to. The curric. I use for Bio also has a "lab" section ... we've done some labs here at home - some our Christian school has graciously invited him to join in. I don't know if I COULD have taught the basics.. laugh.. but at the upper levels there is SO much support out there it makes it much more enjoyable. I will say - no matter WHAT the subject I find myself "relearning" a lot .. lots of reading, researching on my part so I can teach where I need to. We're starting Romeo and Juliet ... anyone have any suggestions?

 

[jenfur]

#1- People calling for more reglation of homeschooling should check up on the regulations that are already in place. There are plenty. Its legal in all 50 states, but you do have a few hoops to jump through.

Here are the requirements for VA:http://www.vahomeschoolers.org/law.html
There is nothing about homeschooling that requires social worker visits, so unless it is advocated that DSS make random visits to all children in public, private and homeschool, it makes no sense.

do understand why people homeschool their children but I do not believe that it is better than the education my dd11 receives. It is tiresome to hear people who do homeschool their children put down public education. Not all public school are equal...there are some excellent schools and there are some awful ones. I know many homeschooling parents do not put down public schools. Parents need to appreciate and respect the opinions and decisions of other parents.

I understand where you are coming from. I respect your decision completely! My sister has all of her kids in public, she did homeschool one of her sons for part of the second grade, but that was it. My D-stepson wanted to be homeschooled by his mom (and she was going to do it because it wasn't fair that my kids didn't "go to school" and he would have to) but we begged her not too. Thankfully she listened.

If I were still living in the school district where my DD attended K, my kids would be in public school and I would homeschool starting 6th grade, but we moved to Henry County VA, and the schools are very lacking here, not to mention my daughter learned a fair amount of racism and sexual comments from other 3rd graders there. I don't put down on public education, it may come across that way at times because everyone wants their decision to have some acceptance. That may be why some homeschoolers go overboard, most of of are used to criticism so we have a list of "Why I Homeschool" memorized.

 

[pearlieq]

The idea of homeschooling as always appealed to me, to the horror of just about everyone I've ever met. If we have kids I would strongly consider it as an option.

I went to fabulous public schools--some of the best in the nation and I feel I got a decent education and a lot of opportunity from them. Still, I spent a lot of time being very, very bored and feeling like I needed to conform to some norm for the teacher's convenience. I would love to be able to provide a more enriched, child-directed education for my child. I am well educated and feel I would be able to provide compentent instruction to my kids, but if there were ever a topic I couldn't handle, we have several local tutors available. Also the local community colleges will let younger students enroll for classes. If they needed subject-based instruction I think that would be more helpful.

All of that being said, I have no beef with public or parochial education. Whatever works best for your family is right. I don't even mind funding the public education I won't be using, but I do wish the schools would be a bit more cooperative with homeschoolers. It would be nice if they would leave extracurriculars open to homeschooled kids. Hopefully we can make some progress on that front.