**Holiday DRAMA** (b/c of budget or otherwise ;)

[mafibisha]

So I just read the other thread on *re-gifting* and had a good laugh been there, experienced that We're all looking to save a buck (budget related! )

People, *family* are a hoot, especially at Christmas, so share your best Christmas drama. It'll make us all feel like we're in good company

Our drama is certain to be coming later today, when we get together with the other side of the family. O. M. G.

 

[MinnieForMe]

Hi:

Budget Problem: SIL trying to pass a Target doll off as American Girl.

Let me preface this by saying my daughter is American Girl obsessed. She watches the movies, loves the catalogs and has been to the store. She knows all of the dolls names. She has also spent time at Target and checked those dolls out too!

She is only five year's old. My niece shows up with her new American Girl doll from Target and my daughter says "that's not an American Girl doll, it's the one from Target that I saw". My SIL pipes in that it's American Girl. Of course, I quickly say "It's a new one that you don't know from AG". I was so embarassed and had to speak to her about keeping your mouth quiet so as to avoid hurting other's feelings. Unfortunately, it then lead to a conversation that she was only telling the truth that Auntie was lying and what's wrong with having a Target doll anyway. She doesn't know prices yet and wasn't being snobbish at all.

How do you handle situations like this?

 

[Eastern]

How do you handle situations like this?

I would have said, "It doesn't matter, go play with your dolls." Done.

My kids didn't even know that Nike was a brand until they were in their mid- teens. Teacher gave one of them an assignment where he had to list brand names of various things and he didn't know how to do it.

I never made a big deal about brand names and I'm glad I didn't. They are now adult/nearly adults and they really don't care one way or the other.

 

[beansmom]

we are fortunate here...drama free.

 

[MinnieForMe]

I would have said, "It doesn't matter, go play with your dolls." Done.

My kids didn't even know that Nike was a brand until they were in their mid- teens. Teacher gave one of them an assignment where he had to list brand names of various things and he didn't know how to do it.

I never made a big deal about brand names and I'm glad I didn't. They are now adult/nearly adults and they really don't care one way or the other.

Why didn't I think of that? It's so simple but I was so taken aback that my daughter said something in the first place. Seriously, she wasn't being mean.

 

[hffmnheidi]

Kids at that age just say whatever is on their mind, but I do think your sister in law(who probably knew your daughter is AG crazy would know the dolls well) is partially to blame for that little bit of drama.

Wouldn't it have been better to just be honest with her own child about the doll?

Some people just don't get it and I'm sure your sister in law's daughter will find out that the doll isn't an American Girl Doll from her friends very soon.

 

[ceecee]

I would have said, "It doesn't matter, go play with your dolls." Done.

My kids didn't even know that Nike was a brand until they were in their mid- teens. Teacher gave one of them an assignment where he had to list brand names of various things and he didn't know how to do it.

I never made a big deal about brand names and I'm glad I didn't. They are now adult/nearly adults and they really don't care one way or the other.

This is how it should be! Unfortunately, it's not. My Girl Scout troop went to an AG Tea Party when they were in 3rd grade and could bring their dolls. One girl brought her "our generation" and the other girls quickly told her it was a fake, I felt so bad for her, she wouldn't take it. DD gave her one of her AG dolls to take instead. We had a long talk at the next meeting and "abby...the fake" was suddenly welcomed.

 

[denecarter]

My mom's side of the family has been doing a Chinese Christmas on Christmas Eve for years... and over the years there has been a LOT of drama. This year, one of my aunts brought gifts for her and her husband to play with. They ate dinner and then left, saying two of my nephews could play in her place.

Long story short... one of the gifts was a plastic tablecloth and a bag of fresh turnips, dirt included.

We have NO idea what the heck she was thinking. My husband even had me Google "Christmas turnips" to see if there was some meaning. Nope.

After getting to my parents' house, my mother tried to tell me and my brothers that we needed to drop it and would never mention this incident again... no, Mom, this "gift" will live in infamy!

 

[fakereadhed]

LOL about googling Christmas Turnips!

Family drama yesterday was DD 16 telling me my SIL walked up to her DD(also 17) and said taste this wine. According to my DD she told her mom she didn't like alcohol. She supposedly made her try it, then said she would buy some sweeter wine so she would be able to drink it. This after my other SIL had let her DD drink hard lemonade at Christmas dinner at age 14(she's now a heavy drinker at 21) and also asked my then 10 yo why she'd never done jello shots.

Love the holidays with DH's family. Makes me feel normal and makes the kids appreciate us as parents more.

 

[Mom2Ben02]

Love the holidays with DH's family. Makes me feel normal and makes the kids appreciate us as parents more.

Soooooo true.

Our drama happened a few months ago...but it included Christmas. My MIL was not happy that I did not accept her friend request on Facebook, so she "never wants to see me or THOSE CHILDREN OF MINE ever again". (There was a lot in between the two things, but that is the short-short story. And, yes, she said this multiple times, AND to DH as well.) Fast forward to yesterday - and she was mad that I would not bring over the kids.

 

[SILLYANDI]

MIL lost it when DS opened his present from her and said "Oh I have this one!" (in an excited tone like he's won the nerf lottery because he now has 2 monster guns). She starts ranting "I paid a lot of moeny for that. I wish someone would have told me you have it already. Why would you write that on your list if you have it already! I'm just going to take it back, that was a lot of money" (um, You are a millionaire- not kidding. He got it from Santa a few hours ago so he didn't write down something he already had and why wouldn't YOU ask Santa what she planned to get the kids BEFORE you went shopping instead of snooping at the Christmas lists and other papers on our counter then trying to one up her?!).
Then the exact scene was repeated as DD6 opened her GoGo my walking pup and said "Santa got me this too".
Seriously, these were the #1 item on both of their lists, did she think Santa was going to skip over them?
The icing on the cake is when DD10 asks me why I didn't get anything to open from Grandma and I'm being all kinds of nice saying "Oh I don't need anything" and "it's more fun to watch you guys". Grandma says, "I saved the best gift for last!" and hands me an envelope. I open it and it's a gift certificate for my husband's favorite restaurant written out to him. My turn to be passive agressive so I say, "OH WOW! I love Miyako. I'm going to eat lunch there tomorrow for work!". Grandma promptly tells me," Well that's actually for DH for HIS lunches".
Luckily DH has a step mom whom I adore that makes up for all this drama.

 

[EllenFrasier]

Our drama for Christmas day: I should have known that things were going too smoothly. We ate breakfast before presents this year which has never happened before. Everyone loved their gifts, kids helped pick up wrapping paper, I got to relax and watch the Disney parade with Dh and dd12. All was well. Then we got ready to go to my Mom's house for dinner. That's when things got complicated.

Ds17 was told to get ready to leave about 30 minutes before departure time. Everyone was out in the van and we were waiting for him because he waited until the last minute to get ready. He came slamming out of the house all mad about something and flung the van door open throwing it off the track! I didn't even know the van doors could come off the track. He was angry because he dropped one of the gifts he had purchased for his aunt and it broke. Still no excuse for handling the van door that way. So Dh and I and other ds21 are out in the driveway freezing trying to get the door shut. We could not get it back on the track, so we shut it as far as it would go and we were off. All the way to my Mom's Dh is fuming about the van door and ds is feeling bad about the present and the door and says he's not getting out of the van when we get there. Of course, he did when he calmed down a little.

Then at my Mom's, we were trying to eat dinner a little earlier but her squash was like petrified or something and was not getting done. So I switched it tot he bigger oven and turned it up - no big deal, but it was taking forever!

The phone rang and my sister went to answer the extension in the livingroom and when she turned back around she tripped over same ds17 shoes and fell on the floor! Her whole body! Quite the site and I did very well not laughing (I have that reaction sometimes.). She has a bad knee and we were all worried that she hurt it, but it was not her knee it was her leg. Guess who was on the phone? It was my other sister calling to let her know that there was a bottle of wine in the fridge if anyone wanted any! My sister's like "no thanks, I'm already on the floor!"

Guess that was about it. The food tasted great once that darn squash got done, but it was kind of weird otherwise!

 

[jacksmomma]

Drama runs in circles over here! I have 2 stories to share...

The first is just funny...my aunt is not a book person at all, the only thing I have seen her read in 10 years are tab. magazines! Her boss always gets her a $30 gift card to...wait for it...Borders! So, she "re-gifts" the card to me. This year she left it in the opened Borders envelope. She scribbled out her own name on the front, turning the scribble into a Christmas tree and stuck it in my Christmas card! I love it and her...she is so funny!

Story #2: My grandmother has always been completely unfair with her affection, attention, and gifts with her kids and grandkids. We have all grown to accept it. Well, now that her favorite has moved far away she has "adopted" her neighbor families. (She uses the term adopted, not us.) She gets them gifts that are better than the ones her kids get. So during our visit this year she gives us a family gift of money. DS is a preschooler, he does not understand the concept of a check. So when the "adopted kids" get gift bags of toys he promptly says, "Grandma, where is my present?" Yikes! I quickly tried to explain things to him. I am not sure if he got it though.

 

[dfchelbay]

MIL lost it when DS opened his present from her and said "Oh I have this one!" (in an excited tone like he's won the nerf lottery because he now has 2 monster guns). She starts ranting "I paid a lot of moeny for that. I wish someone would have told me you have it already. Why would you write that on your list if you have it already! I'm just going to take it back, that was a lot of money" (um, You are a millionaire- not kidding. He got it from Santa a few hours ago so he didn't write down something he already had and why wouldn't YOU ask Santa what she planned to get the kids BEFORE you went shopping instead of snooping at the Christmas lists and other papers on our counter then trying to one up her?!).
Then the exact scene was repeated as DD6 opened her GoGo my walking pup and said "Santa got me this too".
Seriously, these were the #1 item on both of their lists, did she think Santa was going to skip over them?
The icing on the cake is when DD10 asks me why I didn't get anything to open from Grandma and I'm being all kinds of nice saying "Oh I don't need anything" and "it's more fun to watch you guys". Grandma says, "I saved the best gift for last!" and hands me an envelope. I open it and it's a gift certificate for my husband's favorite restaurant written out to him. My turn to be passive agressive so I say, "OH WOW! I love Miyako. I'm going to eat lunch there tomorrow for work!". Grandma promptly tells me," Well that's actually for DH for HIS lunches".
Luckily DH has a step mom whom I adore that makes up for all this drama.

Your mother in law sounds like a real bitc$%&*

 

[hffmnheidi]

This is why kids do/should make lists for everything they want and then "Santa" can divide the list between what he buys/grandparents/aunts and uncles...so no one gets duplicates of toys. But you always get that one family member that just won't listen and thinks they can out-do everyone else.

 

[Leader of the Club]

Christmas Eve was supposed to be just the five of us...DH, Me, DD22, DS13 and DS6. In-laws call at 3:00 and want to know if they can come to Christmas Eve service with us at 5:00. Sure, no problem. But we live right behind the church and they know we always come home to soup after Christmas Eve service, so I invited them over. No big deal...increase soup.

My DD22 calls. Can her boyfriend and his fam come to Christmas Eve service and over for soup and cookies after? Okay, sure, no problem. Increase soup pot and soup!

Thank goodness for a well-stocked pantry and freezer. What started out as a quiet dinner for 5, turned into a party for 14!

Ok, not really drama...except I had to clean up the house and make a lot of soup on very short notice!

 

[kelleyrn2000]

Our drama always seems to include my FIL. In many years past we would run around to both his house and my mom's house on Christmas Eve. A couple hours here and a couple hours there. A few years ago, we decided that since my mom was no longer able to host Christmas Eve, we would have her and my dad over (they are divorced) to our house, along with anyone else on either side who wanted to come over (including FIL).

In past, FIL would totally ignore us on Christmas Eve at his house, except to come into the room for gift opening, yet it apparently was "so important to him" to celebrate Christmas Eve. Nevermind the fact that he is not a Christian, he doesn't even believe in God. But for Nostalgic reasons, he likes Christmas Eve in his farmhouse that he grew up in.

So this year, his gf sent us an email before Thanksgiving with a whole 4 hour itinerary of Christmas Eve at their house. No invitation, just this is what we have planned. Apparently we were expected to be there. I emailed back that we would be having Christmas Eve with my parents (also divorced) at our house, they were welcome. At the time I was expecting my brother to come from out of town (he didn't make it).

Fast forward Christmas Eve, we ended up doing brunch at their house. That wasn't good enough for them. After shocking me, DH, SIL, BIL with proposing to his girlfriend (he just got divorced a few months ago), he then turned to me and basically demanded that I commit to spending next year's Christmas Eve at his house..."no later than 7 oclock." I was in shock, and dh was no help. I had no idea how to even respond. Then next day, Christmas Day at my MIL's house, I openly discussed this with family, and expressed that I felt manipulated and offended by it. SIL said FIL was angry with me and that he thinks it was my fault that DH doesn't spend Christmas Eve at his house anymore. Now I am fuming mad!! But at least we have a whole year to come up with a good reason not to go over there at all...what an *&(*!

BTW this same manipulative FIL decided it would be a good idea a couple of years ago to find out who is real friends were. He asked each of them separately if he could borrow 5,000.00 if he needed it. If they said no, they were no longer friends. If they said yes, they were good enough to be friends. He didnt need 5,000.00, it was just a test, he said.

 

[cheshireqt]

No real drama, just got a huge laugh out of this...MIL and FIL had a conference call Christmas day with their two sons (one in Ohio and my DH here in VA) and the grandkids. SIL and are excused, oh I mean excluded from this, b/c they have not been talking to either of us DILs for several years now, (b/c we fail to get with the program and let them dictate and micromanage all aspects of our parenting, finances, vacations, etc, etc. Even when they pull out all their best manipulation games, so sad).
Anyway, back to the story at hand, we of course are having a grand chat on our cell phones and hearing parts of the conversation taking place in our respective houses b/c MIL speaks at a decibel level that almost shatters the windows. She was apparently very excited about it snowing in Alabama and remarked that they always have a white Christmas in Huntsville, (huh?) My daughter and one of the nephews in OH point out that it is snowing in their neighborhoods as well. MIL impatiently huffs "yes, that's great, but our snow is really white and much fluffier than the snow you are getting in OH and VA."

SIL will have fun for years with her snow being whiter and better than ours

 

[Hannahsmom]

Unfortunately, our Christmas drama will have long lasting repercussions. MIL insisted we attend church services with them on Christmas Eve, even though we are NOT the same religion. And knowing that I have serious objections to her churches policies and politics, she continued to bully us into attending. In a nut shell, we were to Shut Up, Show Up and Smile.

But Karma came to the rescue....she has a nasty stomach bug today.

 

[ktlm]

Unfortunately, I'm the drama this year. It started a few days ago when I went to wrap the shirts I got DH for Christmas. I had bought them and then run in the house and hid the bag without taking them out or looking in it. I got the bag out to wrap, and one of the shirts...the Ralph Lauren ...was missing. It was on the receipt, but apparently the clerk forgot to put it in the bag with the rest (at least I hope it was an innocent mistake and her husband isn't wearing it right now). Obviously, no bother even trying to go to the store and prove that one. At least it was on sale, but it still wasn't cheap. Then, we get up Christmas morning and open gifts. There is only one thing (other than what DD (4) picked for me) that I asked for, that I didn't buy myself and hand someone to "give" me because everyone was too busy to shop, or that DH didn't buy right in front of me (we had an extremely busy fall, so I told DH I would make it easy on him because he buys the gifts for me from himself, my Mom, and his parents). I wanted the Lancome beauty box. I made clear the "cool colors" which are the "purple and pink colors", as I can't wear the others. So I get the Lancome box yesterday, and I'm all excited and I open it and....yep all browns and golds...my skin is pretty much as pink and pale as you can get so there is not one item in that box I can use. My Mother (who insisted to DH she was buying it herself), flips out and grabs the box to insist it says "colds", before we can stop her, she scrapes off the little return sticker into tiny irretreivable bits...and of course, it says "gold". Not that it matters, because of course, they are sold out everywhere and there is no way to get the right one. Then, because everything is all about her, she proceeds to go on a rant and rave about the evil store clerk and carry on, as I'm trying to tell her it is just a make-up box and not to flip out (but she can see I'm disappointed so she is putting on a huge show), and my poor four year old got upset and yelled at us to quit arguing and ran out of the room. Poor kid. My DD has been telling me for a month what she picked out for me, and only half of it was there. Apparently, she forgot to tell DH both things she was getting me so he could order the other part! No big deal. My sweet darling MIL offered to make Christmas dinner, so we could travel the few hours down there at a decent hour instead of having to cook first, and the poor thing thought she got a real turkey breast, but it turned out she had accidently bought pressed meat. We're talking rubber turkey spam. I think FIL must have "helped" with the mashed potatoes and spilled half a bottle of pepper in them too. The grown ups were trying to be polite (I think I managed to swallow 2 bites of turkey before I hid the rest and I took 2 bites of the potatoes, but I started coughing each time on those, so I had to give it up), but DD is not so gracious. She took one bite and then refused to eat any of it, and there was nothing else in the house for her to eat, and of course nothing was open. So DD got cookies and pie for dinner, which of course led to a sugared up kid. Then, I go to get ready to go to our annual Christmas lunch at a nice restaurant today, and I go to my hanging bag to get my absolute favorite dressy sweater...and something on a wire hook hanger had slipped while we were traveling and torn a hole in my sweater and ruined it. Then, my Mom had left her shoes out in the living room, but they were partially obscured so of course I tripped over them and fell flat on my face. Not. My. Weekend. At least the kid had fun, which is the most important thing anyway.