Help me think through this (good) problem

[aprilfoolwed]

Background info - Prekids, I worked full-time in a large public library. Went part-time after 1 kid, and left my position when I was expecting my 2nd. Been a SAHM for 10 years, working various p/t jobs over the years to make ends meet. In November, I secured a part-time job in a small, subburban library. I am happy in my current position, but very recently discovered my old will be available in a few month. This morning, when speaking with my old boss, I was told that if I am interested the position is mine (although I still have to jump through the application and interview hoops, but my old boss is doing the actual hiring and wants me back).

So, having TWO good job options is a very good thing - no complaints about that. But I am not sure what to do here.

Part-time Job - Pros - Super close to my home (6 minutes away!), beautiful subburban location, co-workers are nice, part-time schedule allows me to be both employee and mom with ease.

Part-time Job - Cons - Although co-workers are nice, they are a bit micro-managing, which can be frustrating, low pay, no benefits, nearly no opportunity to move into full-time work/higher pay/different responsibilities, duties (although perfectly fine) do not make best use of my talents (I used to do youth programs, and do not get to do that at all in current position).

Full-time Job - Pros - Salary (although not high, on par with the industry. And I would be making 3x what I make now, and working less than 2x more hours), Would be doing youth programs, bigger library system = more opportunity, full benefits (health, retirement, vacation/sick days), already know my co-workers (worked with them for years already) and enjoy them very much.

Full-time Job - Cons - Full-time hours require finding (and paying for) childcare for my 2 youngest (and spending some time worrying about my oldest being home alone after middle school), full-time hours prevent me from doing my current level of volunteer work in the schools, longer commute (although not LONG at all - 15-20 mins), urban location is not as cozy as the subburbs and requires me to pay for parking.

Both positions require me to work 2 nights/week and 2 weekends/month.

i am sure there are some other moms out there that have faced this decision - what did you do and how did you feel about it?

I feel blessed to even be considered for this position after being out of the industry for 10 years!

 

[indimom]

If it was me, I'd take the full time job.
The day care situation seems like the only drawback and that will only last for a couple more years. You know you love it there and you will be happy there.
In the long run, it seems like the better option to me.

 

[mikey20]

I would take the full time. The childcare would only last a few more years.

 

[Darcy03231]

Here's another vote for taking the full time job.

 

[angierae]

Take the full time gig. Your younger ones are only going to need daycare a little bit longer (and it looks like it would be afterschool care during the school year, yes? That's even cheaper) If you had little ones in full time daycare I might not think it was the best idea, but with older kids, the cost shouldn't be too bad, and it might be much harder to get back into your field 3-4-5 years from now.

 

[stsomewhere]

I was just offered full time position out of the blue. I have been a stay at home mom for 12 yrs. My kids are in 8th and 5th grade.

I enjoy volunteering at my kids school, etc.

After discussing it with my husband, we decided it would be best for me to continue to stay home.

 

[Skatermom23]

Do you need the money? If so, take the full time position. If you don't need the money, then I would stay part time. As an emptynester, I can tell you that those years that you have your kids home will go so quick.

 

[jennyjinx3]

That is a hard call. I too am a SAHM who works part-time. I also volunteer at kids school. I keep saying to myself that I will work more hours or get a full time job when they are all in school full time. BUT I know I will miss volunteering and having that connection with them and their school.

Your kids are a bit older, and your oldest is 10 so for you, maybe going back full time is the right choice. It sounds like a wonderful job (I've always thought it would be so nice to work at a library). Whatever you decide, you sound like a great mom for really thinking it through. Good luck!

 

[mjhd]

I vote full time since you know you'll enjoy it...unless you were considering doing the pt long term to be with your kids more. How many hours would they need to be in childcare? After you pay that and parking, figure in the extra costs of a longer commute (tangible and intangible), would you still come out ahead?

 

[aprilfoolwed]

To answer a few questions, we don't NEED the money, but it would be helpful (especially since we are about to list our house for sale and buy something bigger).

Kids would only need childcare afterschool (which would be for 90 mins a day except for Wednesdays - which would be 3 hours - early dismissal every Wednesday. Ugh!). There is a possibility (depending on where we find a new home) that they could go to family's house after school (at no cost). Or, there are several teens that I could employ, so costs would not be too much.

The extra commute would add little cost, and parking is reasonable. I would still be ahead with the full-time job.

I do a lot of volunteer work with the kids' schools, and I know I would miss that. However, the kids are getting older. My older two kids' teachers do not have parents helpers in the classroom anymore. I am in my youngest's classroom weekend. In addition, I also run the Drama Club before school (however, I have fully trained a teacher volunteer at this point, so someone else is ready to step in to my role next year). But I will miss that time at home. I love the flexibility of working part-time. I also love working in my own neighborhood - I see a lot of friends while I work and it's a nice, friendly environment.

However, I miss doing youth programs a lot. ANd there is something special about knowing you are bringing literacy into the lives of kids who may not be exposed any other way.

Thank you all for the input. I guess I will send in the resume and see what the interview brings. My old boss did not have full salary and benefits info (although she will be doing the hiring, she does not control the budget).

The new position would start in June, and I do have family available to watch the kids over the summer, so we would have a nice transition period available to us before the new school year starts.

 

[ilovemk76]

I would take the full time. The childcare would only last a few more years.

This

 

[ilovemk76]

Do you need the money? If so, take the full time position. If you don't need the money, then I would stay part time. As an emptynester, I can tell you that those years that you have your kids home will go so quick.

OP - This is not about you, just a general comment.


This is not a simple, "We are paying our bills, so we don't need the money" question.

Paying your bills maybe just paying the minimum payment on your CCs and just staying current on other bills but not saving for the future. This person can say they don't need the money but.....

1) That money could pay off the CCs.

2) Then it could be used to shore up or start the retirement savings.

3) Then it could be put into a 529 for the kids. I am sure the kids would prefer mom to work than come out of college with all that debt.


----

OP - Would the FT job bridge your previous service WRT vacation time, retirement and the like?

 

[elaine amj]

What do you want for your future? Do you plan to keep working forever? Do you hope to move to full time at some point? In your ideal scenario, if you plan to move to fulltime at some point, when is that point be?

I would start with painting your ideal scenario over the next few years. How would you LIKE your career to progress? Once you know what you want, then you can consider your options in the light of how well it will help you get to where you want to be.

So if your ideal scenario is that you work full time in 1-2 years, then you should consider this opportunity carefully. Yes, its a little earlier than your ideal, but not too much earlier and you will have the extra income to cover childcare, etc. And yes, you won't have as much time to volunteer, etc.

The other thing to keep in mind is that many families have a transition period when a SAHM becomes a working mom. I was a WAHM (part time work running my own business) for many years. When I started working in an office full time when my youngest entered kindergarten, it was a tough transition for all of us. For a while, both my kids quarreled nonstop the moment I walked in the door. They were angels before I got home. That lasted several months (I kept thinking I should just move out!).

At the end of the day though, it's proven to be the best decision for us for me to return to work fulltime. The extra income (while not necessary) has made things like WDW vacations possible. This has also helped me progress in my career.

For some families, its a better decision to be a SAHM forever. And that's fine too. You might decide part time work is best for you for the long term.

For us, we made the conscious decision for DH not to consider/work towards promotions when our babies were born. It is now many years later that they are older that he is taking his Masters and will work on advancing his career. It would have been hard for him to have a hectic job in my early fulltime work days as I worked a lot of extra hours at that time. We needed him home and stress free with the kids. Now, my work is more stable so he can work on that promotion in the next 1-2 years after getting his Masters.

 

[aprilfoolwed]

OP - This is not about you, just a general comment.


This is not a simple, "We are paying our bills, so we don't need the money" question.

Paying your bills maybe just paying the minimum payment on your CCs and just staying current on other bills but not saving for the future. This person can say they don't need the money but.....

1) That money could pay off the CCs.

2) Then it could be used to shore up or start the retirement savings.

3) Then it could be put into a 529 for the kids. I am sure the kids would prefer mom to work than come out of college with all that debt.


----

OP - Would the FT job bridge your previous service WRT vacation time, retirement and the like?

I totally agree about "needing the money," but we've always put value on having a stay-at-home parent too. So while we could certainly always use more income, we've been okay with the income we're used to as well. But certainly more income would open some new opportunities for saving/retirement/college/etc.

I would not get any credit for prior service, as it was 10 years ago that I was there, and I was not vested in the retirement program at that time. However, I am only 35 years old, so getting a f/t job NOW with good retirement benefits gives me a lot of time to save up. The PTO was quite generous from the start - everyone got the same PTO (not a program where the longer you are there, the more time you get).

 

[aprilfoolwed]

What do you want for your future? Do you plan to keep working forever? Do you hope to move to full time at some point? In your ideal scenario, if you plan to move to fulltime at some point, when is that point be?

I would start with painting your ideal scenario over the next few years. How would you LIKE your career to progress? Once you know what you want, then you can consider your options in the light of how well it will help you get to where you want to be.

So if your ideal scenario is that you work full time in 1-2 years, then you should consider this opportunity carefully. Yes, its a little earlier than your ideal, but not too much earlier and you will have the extra income to cover childcare, etc. And yes, you won't have as much time to volunteer, etc.

The other thing to keep in mind is that many families have a transition period when a SAHM becomes a working mom. I was a WAHM (part time work running my own business) for many years. When I started working in an office full time when my youngest entered kindergarten, it was a tough transition for all of us. For a while, both my kids quarreled nonstop the moment I walked in the door. They were angels before I got home. That lasted several months (I kept thinking I should just move out!).

At the end of the day though, it's proven to be the best decision for us for me to return to work fulltime. The extra income (while not necessary) has made things like WDW vacations possible. This has also helped me progress in my career.

For some families, its a better decision to be a SAHM forever. And that's fine too. You might decide part time work is best for you for the long term.

For us, we made the conscious decision for DH not to consider/work towards promotions when our babies were born. It is now many years later that they are older that he is taking his Masters and will work on advancing his career. It would have been hard for him to have a hectic job in my early fulltime work days as I worked a lot of extra hours at that time. We needed him home and stress free with the kids. Now, my work is more stable so he can work on that promotion in the next 1-2 years after getting his Masters.

This was a really helpful post. Thank you.

This year has really been an adjustment for us. I have been working p/t for years, but never daytime hours. I always worked when DH was home to watch the kids. Now I am working 20 hours/week - and have my youngest (kindergarten) in day care half days because of that. So we know all about the adjustment when mom starts working day hours!

If I take this new position, it really is making a choice to restart a CAREER rather than just have a part-time job. It will likely require some continuing education for me in the future, but otherwise will not require take-home work. My DH has a fairly flexible position and is a great help with the kids and household responsiblities.

Also, all three of my children will be in full-day school next year - which does make a difference (at least in my Mommy mind!). I wouldn't be seeing them all day long anyway!

I knew I would get some great advice from the DIS!

 

[HM]

I think the full-time position sounds like a winner. Benefits, more pay that can be saved for a rainy day, actually using the skills you have and enjoy, a way to move up in pay and position. Paying for daycare won't last forever and your added pay will cover that for now. Finding an after school option for your middle school child is really the only con I see for you. That age is particularly important to keep busy and out of trouble. Does his/her school offer anything? (ours had a very inexpensive extra two hours and bus option after school for homework with tutors and activites).

 

[angierae]

I think the full-time position sounds like a winner. Benefits, more pay that can be saved for a rainy day, actually using the skills you have and enjoy, a way to move up in pay and position. Paying for daycare won't last forever and your added pay will cover that for now. Finding an after school option for your middle school child is really the only con I see for you. That age is particularly important to keep busy and out of trouble. Does his/her school offer anything? (ours had a very inexpensive extra two hours and bus option after school for homework with tutors and activites).

It's also a great age to look around and see if there's a Boys and Girls Club that is in your area. The one near us charges $25 a YEAR and the school district provided a bus from the middle school to the B&GC. Now, they insist they're not a 'daycare' and the kids aren't stopped from leaving, but my DD always knew she was to stay there until someone picked her up. She played all sorts of sports through them (coed baseball, floor hockey and basketball), got homework help, had video game/computer time as well as art classes. It was an amazing experience and I wish we'd discovered it sooner.

 

[aprilfoolwed]

Finding an after school option for your middle school child is really the only con I see for you. That age is particularly important to keep busy and out of trouble. Does his/her school offer anything? (ours had a very inexpensive extra two hours and bus option after school for homework with tutors and activites).

There are afterschool activities. She is in band, and I know that takes one day a week for afterschool practice. I am sure she would get involved with other things. I just don't know if there is a late bus to take her home, since we wouldn't be able to pick her up.

If I had a teen coming to care for the other two kids later, then she would only be home an hour by herself each day. If we can find a house closer to my parents, then she could go there after school too. That's my option I hope would work out, but we need to find a house! Nothing for sale in that neighborhood now!

 

[yoopermom]

Librarian here, who lost her f/t job due to layoffs 9 years ago (when DS was 8), now working p/t (with him 17). I have a few (contradictory) thoughts...

With the way libraries are transitioning, I would say JUMP at the f/t one if you think there's any way possible that your family can deal with it. So much of our industry is "who you know", and obviously you know someone.

OTOH (!!!)....

Children are only young once, and it's not only preschoolers who need a mom around. My layoff was a blessing as well as a curse, because, as you've said, I could work p/t, plus volunteer, plus be there when he needed something, etc, etc, etc. You still have your finger in a library pie, it's just a p/t one. Your skills are going to stay current, obviously your personality is great that they all love you , and it's not like this is a lifetime decision. Really talk long and hard with your spouse about who's going to do all those "little" things that you do now (and we all know there are tons of them!). Sometimes that extra $$ ends up going to takeout food because no one has time energy to cook, a house cleaner cuz who has time to clean, extra childcare help (and what happens when that help calls in sick, etc?).

I'm hoping to go f/t once ds is off to college, but I don't regret being a p/t librarian AND f/t wife/mom right now.

Good luck with whatever you decide!!

Terri

 

[MrsPete]

I'd go for the full-time job because

- within a year or two you're going to hit some expensive kid years. Your oldest is going to hit braces and driving soon. We're in the middle of those things right now, and even though we were well-prepared, it's a lot of money to see going out the door.

- you're not far from college. We're just about to hit that timeframe, and -- again -- even though we're prepared, it's daunting.

- I personally think that libraries are going to undergo some changes in the next decade or so (ereaders, economic cut backs, and more), and I think you'll be "safer" in a larger library. You said the larger facility offers more advancement.