Head Table or Sweetheart?

[Princess SarahK]

We have a somewhat large bridal party and I am struggling with the decision of a sweetheart table or a head table. Our total Maids and Groomsman is about 16..I feel like thats a little overwhelming for a head table. And if we do that, are the couples that are BMs and GMs not allowed to sit next to each other? Do they like that?(Im not sure if I would) We are estimating our guest count to be around 85 right now but that could be higher or lower..and thats such a huge party to be at one table. DF thinks its stupid to sit by ourselves and eat "like were on a pedestal and everyone has to watch us eat" I get his point but Im not sure thats what it wouldbe like..Im so lost.

I really have no opinion at this point, I just want someone to tell me what to do and what is best! Please and thank you!

Oh and if someone has pictures of their GF reception I would LOOOVE to see it! Thanks!

 

[april2011bride]

We have a bridal party of 20 including DF and I. I feel the same way. So my planner came up with a Roman table for us. Its a long rectangle table. everyone will be seated all around it, just not directly infront of us.....that way we can still see everything that is going on! HTH!

 

[SaidYes]

We are doing the roman table as well! We have 16 in our bridal party including us and we are going to have the dates of our attendants sit at the head table as well so they are not left to sit with strangers. It won't be as big as it was going to be with one long head table. We've always thought the sweetheart table was a little corny too, and we'd like to get to enjoy our guests while we still can. We'll have our honeymoon to be alone anyway.

 

[katel]

We're just going to sit at another round table, probably with our parents/families - although we do have a small bridal party so we might fit with all of them. We aren't a fan of being on display.

 

[lurkyloo]

For a smaller venue like Whitehall, Ariel's or the Attic, a sweetheart table is nice because you can be tucked into a corner for a more private and intimate dinner, with guests at their own tables close by. But in a ballroom they seem to always put the sweetheart table on display on top of a riser like you're the main event. A Roman table sounds like a good compromise, especially if you can fit all your attendants' partners so they don't have to sit alone.

 

[Disney845]

And if we do that, are the couples that are BMs and GMs not allowed to sit next to each other? Do they like that?(Im not sure if I would)

Feedback from the guest side...I have been on both sides of this. SO is one of 4 sons and has been a groomsman for two of those brothers within the last 7 years that we have been together.

The first wedding had a bridal party of 10 (I think). The bride's party sat at one table with their date/spouse, and the groom's party sat at another table with their date/spouse.

The second wedding had a bridal party of 14 (I think). The bride and groom and their bridal party all sat at one long head table (bridesmaids flanking bride, groomsmen flanking groom) facing the rest of the guests who were at round tables. FWIW, as soon as the speeches/eating was over, the entire bridal party left their long up-front table, and moved their chairs to be around the other round tables to interact with their friends/family anyway, so it seemed kinda silly to have had that table set up.

Despite the fact that SO and I are not yet married, I have been a "member-of-the-family" for longer than the second wedding couple had even known each other, so I was very comfortable sitting at one of the family tables with other family (including sister-in-law from wedding #1).

However, if I was just the "date" of a random (non-relative) bridal party member, who may or may not know other people they might be seated with, I think I would have felt uncomfortable.

Of course it is up to you, but I vote letting the bridal party sit with their dates/spouses.

 

[*Pixiedust1438*]

We were having the same issue, and recently decided to go with the sweetheart table for two reasons; comfort of our bridal party, and also because our bridal party and guest list are kind of disproportionate. I feel like having our large bridal party all up front will be kind of weird since we don't have a very big guest list.

The second wedding had a bridal party of 14 (I think). The bride and groom and their bridal party all sat at one long head table (bridesmaids flanking bride, groomsmen flanking groom) facing the rest of the guests who were at round tables. FWIW, as soon as the speeches/eating was over, the entire bridal party left their long up-front table, and moved their chairs to be around the other round tables to interact with their friends/family anyway, so it seemed kinda silly to have had that table set up.

This is exactly what happened at my sisters wedding. Me and DF were both in the bridal party, and after dinner we felt so weird because we were the only two sitting at the huge head table. Everyone else in the bridal party went and sat with their dates, and my sister and her hubby were busy mingling with everyone.

 

[minniebride]

We are having a head table. I don't like the idea of a sweetheart table-it's just too isolating for me.

 

[mjshorses]

We have a bridal party of 20 including DF and I. I feel the same way. So my planner came up with a Roman table for us. Its a long rectangle table. everyone will be seated all around it, just not directly infront of us.....that way we can still see everything that is going on! HTH!

We are doing the roman table as well! We have 16 in our bridal party including us and we are going to have the dates of our attendants sit at the head table as well so they are not left to sit with strangers. It won't be as big as it was going to be with one long head table. We've always thought the sweetheart table was a little corny too, and we'd like to get to enjoy our guests while we still can. We'll have our honeymoon to be alone anyway.

I think theses are good ideas!

We're just going to sit at another round table, probably with our parents/families - although we do have a small bridal party so we might fit with all of them. We aren't a fan of being on display.

This is exactly what i'm thinking about doing for my own.

 

[elleinad16]

Just wanted to share! I found this image of a HUGE bridal party in ADH seated at a roman table.

It looks really good, actually.

 

[lpizzuro123]

Wow - where did everybody dance at that ADH wedding.

Our reception was at ADH and we had 50 guests and 6 in our bridal party. My DH and I sat at a Sweetheart table and our bridal party sat at a round table with their guests. Only 3 from our bridal party are married and we felt we wanted them to sit with their spouses.

Honestly we hardly sat so I did not feel like we were separated from our guests. We had a buffet so we went up and got our food and ate and then I think we dance and mingled the rest of the day.

Here is a photo of our dance floor. We had the sweetheart table and then 5 tables of 10 around the dance floor.

Where is your reception going to be?

Linda

Hey Danielle, our wedding date was 11/10/08. I love your date. I would have loved 11/10/09 but did not want to wait another year to get married.

 

[princesswendy720]

Just wanted to share! I found this image of a HUGE bridal party in ADH seated at a roman table.

It looks really good, actually.

I think that is just a really loooong head table. A roman table would be wider and would have people sitting on either side of it (so some people's backs were to the rest of the room). That table looks like it couldn't accommodate people sitting on the other side of it.

 

[Stephie77]

What room are you in at the GF? We were in the WHR&P. I had a sweetheart table and then 5 rounds of 10 but I did not have a bridal party just a maid of honor so instead we had our parents at the tables to the right and left of us.(There are some pictures in my PJ on pg 37) However at all my friends weddings that I have been in or gone to usually they have the sweetheart table and then just have the bridesmaids and their significant others at a table on one side of the sweetheart and then the groomsmen and their significant others at a table on the other side of the sweetheart. I know I would not want to sit at a wedding without my husband.

Honestly, you really don't sit down for very long (too much going on) and when you actually sit down for you may want to be able to eat or talk to your DH without everyone screaming over each other. Also it is easier for guests to come talk to you guys if you are sitting at a sweetheart table then a long table. That is my opinion. Ultimately, it is yours and your fiancee's decision what you want to do but that is an idea. Let us know what you decide.

 

[elleinad16]

Hey Danielle, our wedding date was 11/10/08. I love your date. I would have loved 11/10/09 but did not want to wait another year to get married.

Thanks! Yeah, we've been waiting quite a while, but it's almost here now!

I think that is just a really loooong head table. A roman table would be wider and would have people sitting on either side of it (so some people's backs were to the rest of the room). That table looks like it couldn't accommodate people sitting on the other side of it.

Oops, you are right! I guess I don't know my tables. Oh well...