Have/would you leave your kids sleeping alone in the room and go f/swim? *SEE #159*

[nchulka]

Would I do it? No. Even if you could see the door; what if there was an emergency in the room? The only time I have ever left my children "alone" was to sit directly outside the door while they were sleeping to have a glass of wine with my DH. Would you leave them alone at home to go to the neighbors house where you could still see your front door?

I'm not the OP but I would have no problems with leaving a sleeping baby or children to go to a neighbors house. Why would this be a problem? By neighbor I'm assuming someone within sight and walking distance of your own home, not a friend across town. When I was a baby my parents left me sleeping in my crib to get together with all the other neighbors in their court.

I wonder how far things will end up going. First we're afraid to go a house or two away from our babies because think of Madeline McCann, anything can happen. Well what about we should never leave our pre-teens asleep in their own bedrooms, think of Polly Klass or Elisabeth Smart. 20 years from now will there be post about negligent parents who went into their own kitchen without lugging their 6 year old with them, or a mom who threw on a load of laundry in the basement while leaving her 10 year old all alone in the living room, where of course anything could happen. 30 years ago there wouldn't of even been a question, every parent would be out in the pool after getting the little ones to sleep, I really fear where we will be 30 years from now.

 

[dancin'girl]

On our last trip my husband returned to the room with the kids and I stayed behind at the pool. When I returned a little later I realized I had no key. I knocked on the door but couldn't get in (kids were sleeping, hubby in bathroom). A maid happened by and just let me in the room, no questions asked. This was helpful, of course, but my husband and I both remarked that it was scary, too. I'm sure she wasn't following protocol. Just throwing it out there that if someone wanted in, they may be able to under the right circumstances.

 

[MelanieMichelle]

I'm not the OP but I would have no problems with leaving a sleeping baby or children to go to a neighbors house. Why would this be a problem? By neighbor I'm assuming someone within sight and walking distance of your own home, not a friend across town. When I was a baby my parents left me sleeping in my crib to get together with all the other neighbors in their court.

I wonder how far things will end up going. First we're afraid to go a house or two away from our babies because think of Madeline McCann, anything can happen. Well what about we should never leave our pre-teens asleep in their own bedrooms, think of Polly Klass or Elisabeth Smart. 20 years from now will there be post about negligent parents who went into their own kitchen without lugging their 6 year old with them, or a mom who threw on a load of laundry in the basement while leaving her 10 year old all alone in the living room, where of course anything could happen. 30 years ago there wouldn't of even been a question, every parent would be out in the pool after getting the little ones to sleep, I really fear where we will be 30 years from now.

I totally agree. If more parents were sitting on their front porches, or sitting on their neighbours' front patios, in the evening hours instead of inside our homes next to our baby monitors, our streets would be safer for everyone, and any potential kidnappers would be spotted before they entered the neighbourhood.

Sadly, most childhood accidents occur while children are bike-riding, eating, swimming or doing any of the common activities we allow them to do, and when they are abducted or abused it is more likely to be by their own family members, baby sitters, teachers or coaches and not a stranger. I find these risks more of a concern as a parent than the idea of a random fire spontaneously combusting in our hotelroom or a kidnapper lurking in the bushes nearby.

It is impossible to prevent all risk for those we love. Our children are a thousand times more likely to be killed in a car accident on the way to the park than by any other cause and yet we drive there everyday. We can't live our lives imprisoned by fear of what might be.

 

[Dustykins]

I'm not really over protective. I let my 6 year old play in our (fenced) back yard while I'm inside. I leave my (almost) 3 year old in the house while I walk across the street to wait for the bus with my son. I leave my daughter buckled in her car seat in the closed garage with a baby monitor if she falls asleep in the car (not over night) and I have been known to do stuff in my yard while the kids are asleep (with a monitor). Heck, I've left the kids asleep in the camper with the monitor and walked across the road to a neighbor's campsite. I'd probably feel comfortable sitting right outside my room with my kids asleep, but I don't think I'd be comfortable with being in the pool at a hotel while my kids slept. I don't think it's awful that anybody else would, but it would be outside my comfort zone. (dangling my feet in would be a different story, but that's not what the OP was describing, to my understanding). Getting out of the pool takes too long, honestly. Even if you could see the door of the room, could you get out and to the room in time if someone decided to run in and grab a kid? That kind of thing only takes seconds. Plus, hotel rooms aren't child proofed at all. A two year old can be pretty quiet when they're doing something they know they shouldn't be doing. Yeah, the chances of them getting seriously injured while you're a few steps away is remote, but what are the chances they'll destroy something in the room that you'll have to pay damages for? Nah, not something I could do!

 

[DeniseinNS]

I'm wondering if this is regionally based. I'm Canadian and it's quite common for parents in our area to do this. My nine year old also walks to the local library by himself and goes to school on the city bus alone. We don't live in a small town either, and as a child I also did these things and I lived in Toronto.

I'm Canadian as well and it's defiantly not the norm here for a 9 year old to take the city bus. I just recently started letting my 9 year old go to the next block to her friends house on her own but that's as far as she can go.

I remember we were allowed to run all over town when we were kids but there's no way I could let my kids do that and be comfortable about it. When I was 8 or 9 I was walking from the store with my friend and my brother (who is 2 years younger) a man grabbed my brother and put him in his car, thankfully he was able to get away. I think this is part of why I am so overprotective but better safe then sorry.

 

[minandmick]

This question is ridiculous.

No, don't leave your kids alone in a closed room (esp a 2 year old). You are NOT at home so it is not the same...end of story. If you want to do something like this, pay to bring a family member or a trusted babysitter with you on your trip.

Make up all the excuses why you think it's ok, but that's the bottom line.

However, it is very apparent that the OP is going to do whatever she feels like doing in the first place.

Here's the real question, if you weren't going to seriously consider the negative responses to your question, why even post the question at all?

Stuff like this drives me crazy.

 

[mrssmith06]

I personally would not do it, not with a 2 year old, no way.
My kids will be 7 and 4 when we go and I would not leave them in the room alone and go to the pool, no matter how close it is. Maybe around 10 years old I would feel OK with it. JMO

 

[bumbershoot]

Just FYI, that is CSR not CBR, and it is really lovely. We have stayed there twice and really enjoyed it.

Just a little FYI, that picture is of CSR (Coronado Springs Resort) not CBR. Didn't want you to book a regular room at CBR and be disappointed that the area looked nothing like the picture.

Edit: princessmom29 and I must have been posting at the same time!

Thank you, both of you. I was copying it to send to DH, and I saw "casitas" in the name and thought "whoopsiedaisy" but had something else to do (and felt embarrassed that I'd skipped the S and saw a B in between the C and the R!

So now it's added oomph to my thought that I would love CSR...

Although, despite theoretically being "for" the OP's plan (assuming all the "ifs" are taking care of), I highly doubt that I personally would/could do it. I remember when DS was tiny, I would pull up to our apartment complex's bank of mailboxes, and I would take him out to walk the sidewalk depth (3 feet? 4?) to check the mail, because the one time I left him in the car I was nearly panicked by the time I got the mail...and I could be back to the car in two steps!

That said, once he was 4 or so I started to go outside to my brother's hot tub on visits there, with no baby monitor (never had one, but we had/have a family bed so no need other than naps..future baby I'll get a monitor b/c I kept waking him up from naps while checking on him LOL)....so I'm all over the place in woulds coulds and shoulds on this issue!

IF something were to happen, anything, really that would bring attention to the fact that the parents left the kids alone in the room...........what would it look like to the public, to your family?

The best, most rational things, can be spun to look any which way we want. Look at the stuff in the news, lawsuits and the like. McDonalds is still seen as an innocent victim taken by someone who spilled her coffee. People don't even understand that they had been KNOWN to serve their coffee SO HOT that it required *skin grafts* on this woman! I have NO expectation that coffee is going to be served that hot, and there's no real need for it, either. They lost b/c they SHOULD have lost. OR people who bring up "the woman that called the cops b/c she didn't get her chicken nuggets". Yeah, they took her money and wouldn't give her her food OR a refund...she was being robbed...calling the police was perfectly fine to do.

But those have been spun so they look bad, so all people remember is the headline. For those of us who read beyond the headline and beneath the fold (aka "scrolling down" on a computer screen), spin doesn't matter one single little bit.

So to wonder how it would look to others so weak-minded that they believe the headlines? I just can't live my life that way.

 

[MomNeedsVacay]

my favorite part of renting a beach house in the OBX was when the kids were tucked away in bed and the adults go out on the deck and enjoy a glass of wine or a cocktail in the hot tub or pool. I've never thought twice about it. and I think comparing this situation to the "Madeline" story is extreme. Those parents were not near the room and were not within visual contact with the doors and windows...
Everyone has their opinions, but I unpopularly side with the OP.

 

[Cinderella94]

Um...staying away from the actual question here, I'll say that you'll have a very hard time finding a room at POP "10 feet from the pool" and there are no quiet pools there.

 

[crashbb]

Just a little FYI, that picture is of CSR (Coronado Springs Resort) not CBR. Didn't want you to book a regular room at CBR and be disappointed that the area looked nothing like the picture.

Edit: princessmom29 and I must have been posting at the same time!

That and the fact that OP's ticker says that they'll be at POP

 

[Danibelle]

I mean this as an honest question without judgment...

You seem certain that it wouldn't be a problem under the right circumstances. So why did you post the question?

???

 

[maxiesmom]

If everything went perfectly as the OP posted, I don't see any difference between this situation and swimming in the pool in our backyard after our kids are asleep. However, I also agree with the PP who said there are few if any rooms at POP that would meet the OP's requirements.

Not even the fact that resort pools are typically noisey? So much so that I doubt the OP would hear a baby monitor, unless they had it somehow strapped to their ear while they swam.

And I would think that if one of the children woke up and didn't see a parent in the room they would be fairly apt to leave the room and try to find them. It would be very scary for someone that young to wake up somewhere strange and not see mom or dad.

I'm sorry, but I am squarely on the side of it is a very selfish thing to think of doing, and a all around bad idea. One of the worst I have ever read on the Dis.

 

[arihillfarm]

Not even the fact that resort pools are typically noisey? So much so that I doubt the OP would hear a baby monitor, unless they had it somehow strapped to their ear while they swam.

And I would think that if one of the children woke up and didn't see a parent in the room they would be fairly apt to leave the room and try to find them. It would be very scary for someone that young to wake up somewhere strange and not see mom or dad.

I'm sorry, but I am squarely on the side of it is a very selfish thing to think of doing, and a all around bad idea. One of the worst I have ever read on the Dis.

Most baby monitors now have lights as well as sound so you don't have to actually be able to hear it, only see it. Ours also lights up bright red and beeps loudly if there is any interruption in signal, such as being out of range or if someone turns off the base unit and ours is hardly a top of the line unit. I think we paid around $35 for it.

FWIW, we also bring along baby proofing items when we go on vacation. We usually have a 2-3 bedroom condo and with kids sleeping in separate rooms, it's just as necessary as at home. Would I leave JUST a 2 year old in the room by themselves, not a chance unless said 2 year old was still in a Pack N Play. But with an 8 year old and a 6 year old, absolutely. BUT, I would also not treat this as a "sneak away and the kids will never know" type of thing. I'd let the older two know that we were going to be at the pool while they were sleeping so if there was an issue, they would know where we are.

-Astrid

 

[deedeecee]

Answering the OP questions . . . Have I done it or would I feel OK doing it?
No and no. I would not feel comfortable leaving my child alone in a hotel room while I went for a swim. While the edge of the pool or deck chair might be ten feet away from the door, I doubt I would just dog paddle near the edge the whole time in order to remain ten feet away.
If my daughter were to wake in a strange room, and not see the familiar face of myself or her dad, she would panic. I couldn't, I wouldn't, run the risk of that happening just for the sake of a quick swim. Not worth it.

 

[*Seanaci*]

OP, you're staying at POP...as other posters have already mentioned, you must have not stayed at a value before. NONE of the values pools are within distance of kicking a chair INTO the pool. (We stayed at ASmu and there was actually a garden/low bush barrier between the walkway for the hotel rooms and the sitting area for the pool. With the pool about 12 feet from that barrier.) While you may be able to see the door, it doesn't mean it's THAT close to the pool.

Now. Would I leave my child in the room so I could go take a dip in the pool with my husband? Not personally. Especially at a value resort.

 

[tonums]

I don't have an opinion about what the OP asked, since I haven't stayed at that hotel, and can't say what I would think if I did. I think people are overreacting. Fires? Really? Abductions? I am pretty sure DRIVING to the resort presents far more dangers then what the OP has asked. We have only ever stayed at POP after having kids, so you can't really go anywhere outside your room. PLUS, you gotta be a guest and present ID just to get into the POP property. Can someone sneak in that HUGE complex with the intent of abducting YOUR child the 20 minutes you're wetting your feet 10 feet from your door? Maybe theres a possibility. Alot more probable that someone can snatch them away in a department store, or car jacking. Someone would have to be watching YOUR room, with the idea of breaking into YOUR room, all while you are RIGHT THERE.

I love the Madelyn Mccaan references. Google Jessica Lunsford. Abducted from her BEDROOM in the middle of the night by her NEIGHBOR. We can't cover all the bases.

 

[brockash]

I don't have an opinion about what the OP asked, since I haven't stayed at that hotel, and can't say what I would think if I did. I think people are overreacting. Fires? Really? Abductions? I am pretty sure DRIVING to the resort presents far more dangers then what the OP has asked. We have only ever stayed at POP after having kids, so you can't really go anywhere outside your room. PLUS, you gotta be a guest and present ID just to get into the POP property. Can someone sneak in that HUGE complex with the intent of abducting YOUR child the 20 minutes you're wetting your feet 10 feet from your door? Maybe theres a possibility. Alot more probable that someone can snatch them away in a department store, or car jacking. Someone would have to be watching YOUR room, with the idea of breaking into YOUR room, all while you are RIGHT THERE.

I love the Madelyn Mccaan references. Google Jessica Lunsford. Abducted from her BEDROOM in the middle of the night by her NEIGHBOR. We can't cover all the bases.

Just wanted to say this is completely NOT true. You don't have to be a Pop guest (although I'm sure there are criminals that stay as guests at WDW) or show any kind of ID. All you have to do, is jump on a Pop bus. You can do it from any of the theme parks or DTD. I'm sure plenty of ppl. get on Pop property without being a guest.

 

[Wadecool]

I'm hoping we can see our room door from the pool so dh and I can go for a swim with the baby monitor nearby after the kids are asleep. I wouldn't feel comfortable unless we could see the door and hear with the baby monitor. Anyone else do this or feel okay doing this? Our kids will be almost 6 and 8, and a 2yo.

ETA: I'm talking a few feet from the door, not 100. In clear view of the door at all times.

Is this some kind of joke? If not, wow.

 

[MistressMerryweather]

No, I wouldn't leave my children alone in a hotel room to swim regardless of how close the pool was. But I have to ask, why bother asking the question if you have obviously already made your mind up?

As I already posted previously , I am curious. I figured there would be different views and wanted to hear them. I never asked for advice to make a decision.

I would not feel comfortable with it. I don't think you would either...otherwise you would not have even posted this question. I am a pretty laid back mom. I have used in room babysitting at disney as well as the kids clubs. Unless I was on the ground floor and only a few steps away from the room, I would not leave them. Yes I will sit on the patio while the kids are sleeping but I am basically connected to the house...not really the same thing.

Again...I posted out of curiosity because I am completely aware of the black and white differences of opinions I have seen on here and wondered what the group consensus would be.
I am an overprotective parent for the most part, but I trust my mama instincts above and beyond. If I feel okay about this, I know it is okay.

Just wondering how you can allow a complete and total stranger *into* your room to watch your kids, yet you can't sit at a pool table 5-10 feet from your hotel room and facing the door? Really? Because I couldn't even imagine doing anything remotely similar to that. How do you know what type of person is sitting in the dark hotel room with your kids? How will you ever know what went on while you were away. How scared would your children be when they woke up and found a complete and total stranger trying to comfort them? (((shudder)))

I'm not shocked at all & I have to say I agree with the majority that this is not a good choice. I see on your ticker you are staying at the Pop and the rooms are not very close to the pool, even if you paid for a preferred pool location. There is no way you could be in the pool while listening to the monitor with your eyes glued to the door at all times. At that point why even bother, it certainly doesn't sound relaxing or enjoyable to me

I disagree. Completely feasible to stand in the pool facing the door, hanging on the edge facing the room, chatting with dh.

Having children sleep at home in their own beds and home in familiar settings is totally different than sleeping in a hotel room in a strang place that is unfamiliar to them. All it would take is for one of them to wake up and slip out of the room to look for you in the split second that you take your eyes off the door and blink. Pop is a huge resort and they could wander off and become lost in an instant. I don't think kidnapping or something like that is a huge risk, but having them take a wrong turn around a corridor could become very disorienting, particularly if they are half asleep and it is at night. I now I have gotten turned around trying to find my room at Pop! It would not be a risk I would be willing to take.

(bolding is mine) With two people being aware of the door and with a monitor in our face, I highly doubt we would miss hearing the door close.

Look at this picture from CSR.

If I was in one of those ground floor rooms, I would have no problem with being in the pool while my kids were asleep in the room.

Thank you! The only difference between this CSR area and the CBR area is the shape of the building. If I hadn't know it was CSR, I would swear it was CBR. Leave it to someone on the DIS to have the exact picture I am meaning of a tiny nook and cranny spot at one of the resorts.

I have a dumb question but could you not take turns with Dh . One night you could go to the pool and take a quick dip the next night he can go first . For me I would not be willing to take a chance that a one in a million freak thing could happen. If you are comfortable were not going to change your mind anyway. Are you sure your older child would not open the door if they said they were room service, housekeeping maintenance or public service agent . Mine would and his dad is a 911 dispatcher he knows better but when your in a different environment they don't always remember safety first !

(bolding above mine)Of course we would do that(and have) if we were not attempting to spend some quiet time *together*. Kind of defeats the purpose, don't you think?

(bolding above mine)Why would I not be aware of someone knocking on the door if I were feet away? Did you read any of my other posts?

Before she edited to clarify (what she had already said), this was the info given. IF these things were done, THEN she'd go forth. It's too bad so few people noticed it.

Exactly.

IF something were to happen, anything, really that would bring attention to the fact that the parents left the kids alone in the room...........what would it look like to the public, to your family? Imagine if they told the story in a Lifetime movie? (LOL). Would it be considered sufficent for the safety of the kids or negligent?



Pretty much anything is fine as long as nothing bad happens....most people count on that and we do get lots of 'freebies'. As you get older you start to realize the bad stuff can happen to you and you try to head it off whenever possible.

My family knows full well what a protective freak I am. They would have my back 110%. Every post I have made on every board I frequent screams of my concern for my kids...researching everything, trusting few, and highly protective, to a fault. My family and friends would trust that if I thought it was fine, then it was. As far as what the public would think. Who cares. See above sentence.

Believe me, I know the bad can happen. I'm not a 20 year kid. I'm nearly 40 with 3 kids and one on the way. I've been through a lot in my life and am fully aware of how colorless life is when all you do is over-think all the bad that *could* and sometimes happens.

OP you seem like you have a have a good head an your shoulders and can effectively weigh the potential risks with the potential outcomes. Enjoy dipping your feet in the pool.

Thank you so much for that.

No, Not Ever, Not Once, Not even considered

.....Ever hear about Madeline McCann?

Yes, obviously you haven't or you would know that there are no similarities at all with this situation...or you haven't read an ounce of this thread.

This question is ridiculous.

No, don't leave your kids alone in a closed room (esp a 2 year old). You are NOT at home so it is not the same...end of story. If you want to do something like this, pay to bring a family member or a trusted babysitter with you on your trip.

Make up all the excuses why you think it's ok, but that's the bottom line.

However, it is very apparent that the OP is going to do whatever she feels like doing in the first place.

Here's the real question, if you weren't going to seriously consider the negative responses to your question, why even post the question at all?

Stuff like this drives me crazy.

(bolding 1 mine) It is a matter of opinion.
(bolding 2 mine) Here, let me make this a little bit larger since you obviously haven't read my posts on this thread. If you have, you must have missed it several times...
I WAS CURIOUS! I WASN'T TRYING FOR ADVICE! I AM AWARE THAT THERE WOULD BE OTHER OPINIONS AND I WANTED TO HEAR THEM OUT OF CURIOSITY AND AT THIS POINT, PURE AMUSEMENT!

Not even the fact that resort pools are typically noisey? So much so that I doubt the OP would hear a baby monitor, unless they had it somehow strapped to their ear while they swam.

And I would think that if one of the children woke up and didn't see a parent in the room they would be fairly apt to leave the room and try to find them. It would be very scary for someone that young to wake up somewhere strange and not see mom or dad.

I'm sorry, but I am squarely on the side of it is a very selfish thing to think of doing, and a all around bad idea. One of the worst I have ever read on the Dis.

Okay, you obviously haven't read any of the posts either.
I stated, "right circumstance" or we wouldn't do it. I stated that the CBR quiet pool we stayed near last time was dead in the evening and we were there peak season. I stated that we would *NOT* be swimming around the pool, but hanging on the edge chatting, facing the door with monitor sitting in front of us, and spending time together.

If I were facing the door, even 25 feet away, why would I not see one of my children leaving the room???

Thank you, both of you. I was copying it to send to DH, and I saw "casitas" in the name and thought "whoopsiedaisy" but had something else to do (and felt embarrassed that I'd skipped the S and saw a B in between the C and the R!

So now it's added oomph to my thought that I would love CSR...

Although, despite theoretically being "for" the OP's plan (assuming all the "ifs" are taking care of), I highly doubt that I personally would/could do it. I remember when DS was tiny, I would pull up to our apartment complex's bank of mailboxes, and I would take him out to walk the sidewalk depth (3 feet? 4?) to check the mail, because the one time I left him in the car I was nearly panicked by the time I got the mail...and I could be back to the car in two steps!

That said, once he was 4 or so I started to go outside to my brother's hot tub on visits there, with no baby monitor (never had one, but we had/have a family bed so no need other than naps..future baby I'll get a monitor b/c I kept waking him up from naps while checking on him LOL)....so I'm all over the place in woulds coulds and shoulds on this issue!



The best, most rational things, can be spun to look any which way we want. Look at the stuff in the news, lawsuits and the like. McDonalds is still seen as an innocent victim taken by someone who spilled her coffee. People don't even understand that they had been KNOWN to serve their coffee SO HOT that it required *skin grafts* on this woman! I have NO expectation that coffee is going to be served that hot, and there's no real need for it, either. They lost b/c they SHOULD have lost. OR people who bring up "the woman that called the cops b/c she didn't get her chicken nuggets". Yeah, they took her money and wouldn't give her her food OR a refund...she was being robbed...calling the police was perfectly fine to do.

But those have been spun so they look bad, so all people remember is the headline. For those of us who read beyond the headline and beneath the fold (aka "scrolling down" on a computer screen), spin doesn't matter one single little bit.

So to wonder how it would look to others so weak-minded that they believe the headlines? I just can't live my life that way.

Bumbershoot, if I am remembering correctly, I usually agree with your posts about 100% of the time.
Wanted to mention that the CBR rooms by the pool that I am speaking of are identical to the CSR picture posted, except that the building shape is different. Same set up, same distance to the pool, etc.

In reference to all the questions regarding my sig. and staying at POP. I haven't ever been there before. I have stayed at value resorts long ago, but not POP. We have only stayed at moderate resorts in the past lots of years which is why I referenced those. I thought to scope out the rooms to determine if it was possible at POP to be feet from our room.
Like I said previously, I would have to walk around and check out the layout and rooms before checking in. If all they have are what I remember from music and movies, my "check-list" wouldn't be met. Even the preferred rooms are a bit too far from the pool edge and the main pools are extremely noisy and crowded at all hours of the night. Someone early on *did* say that they had a room at POP where the pool was "steps away from their door". So I would have to check that out. I have considered upgrading to a moderate. I haven't made up my mind about that yet. I am a serial "day adder" and "resort changer" so my ticker isn't always accurate. At the moment, it is.

Thanks for sharing your opinions with me. The good, the bad and the ugly. LOL