Hairdressers or Barbers for teen son's haircut?

[tvguy]

What If they cut it way too shirt though

And also he has never been to a barbers

Same thing as if the hair dresser cuts it too short.

 

[NotUrsula]

I'd say that he probably should not go to the barber at this time *if* he and his father get into conflicts over his hair length; this is a tactic sometimes used by men who want their long-haired sons to get short haircuts -- they hope to use the peer pressure of the all-male atmosphere of a barber shop to get the kid to cave under pressure to cut it short. (Also, some barbers simply don't do scissor cutting, so clippers are the only choice there.) If this is the scenario, there is bound to be resentment picked up when the long hair is left on the floor.

If, however, his dad doesn't actually have any issues with son's hair length, then I'd say it's up to the son to choose for the experience, but if he needs a scissor cut and your DH gets a clipper cut, do check in advance that scissor cutting is available.

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

They are just as professional as the hair stylist. They aren't going to cut his shirt

Like others, I say ask him and let him decide.

Sorry that meant to say short not shirt.

I'll edit the post now

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

He probably feels it time for your son to become a “man.” But there’s nothing wrong with going to a salon if they do a good job and your son feels comfortable there.

Tell hubby to let his son decide when, if ever, it’s time to go to a barber.

That's exactly what's happened, my Husband has just started randomly saying our son "needs" a change. My son hasn't said he feels uncomfortable going to the salon and he hasn't said that he doesn't want to go again

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

I’ve been debating the same thing. I’ve been taking my son to the barber for several years, but he’s gone longer shaggy hair look in the last year or so. I feel a hairdresser is more suited to what his hair is now vs the barber shop. The barbers I’ve taken him to have been predominately male stylists with clean cut shaved looks, I rarely see scissors being used which is what we need now. So I’m no help, but see your predicament!

This is exactly my thought process over this

 

[Karin1984]

It doesn't really matter if it's a barber or a hairdresser, he/she has to be good at the job.

Near my home is a barbershop, it's always filled with men of all ages and haircuts. And I can imagine at this age it's a transition into adulthood. A barbershop is a place for adult men, a hairdresser is (mainly) a place for women and kids. Let him try a few and look what he is happy with. If they mess up a hair cut, that's not the end of the world.

A friend lives with his family on the other side of town, they travel to the barbershop near me, because he's that good. He has two young boys, he is the one taking them not the mother. It's a quality time moment with his kids.

Fun story, this family is not big on what is for boys or girls when it comes to clothes or toys. So they played with dolls as well as cars when they grew up. When the eldest went to school of course there were other children pointing out that certain toys were for boys and others for girls. My friend sits the boy down and asks some questions if he thinks that is for boys or for girls. Then they came to professions. He asks: "A police officer, boy or girl", the kid answers "girls." and hairdresser? "Boys."
It took them a while to figure out: He only knew male hairdressers, and they were watching Zootopia a lot which stars female cop Judy
(Disclaimer, in Dutch we can use the same word for barber and hairdresser)

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

It doesn't really matter if it's a barber or a hairdresser, he/she has to be good at the job.

Near my home is a barbershop, it's always filled with men of all ages and haircuts. And I can imagine at this age it's a transition into adulthood. A barbershop is a place for adult men, a hairdresser is (mainly) a place for women and kids. Let him try a few and look what he is happy with. If they mess up a hair cut, that's not the end of the world.

A friend lives with his family on the other side of town, they travel to the barbershop near me, because he's that good. He has two young boys, he is the one taking them not the mother. It's a quality time moment with his kids.

Fun story, this family is not big on what is for boys or girls when it comes to clothes or toys. So they played with dolls as well as cars when they grew up. When the eldest went to school of course there were other children pointing out that certain toys were for boys and others for girls. My friend sits the boy down and asks some questions if he thinks that is for boys or for girls. Then they came to professions. He asks: "A police officer, boy or girl", the kid answers "girls." and hairdresser? "Boys."
It took them a while to figure out: He only knew male hairdressers, and they were watching Zootopia a lot which stars female cop Judy
(Disclaimer, in Dutch we can use the same word for barber and hairdresser)

I'm not big on certain stuff just being for girls and certain stuff just for boys either to be honest.

I'm just worried that the barbers won't be experienced with his longer hair.

 

[Karin1984]

I'm not big on certain stuff just being for girls and certain stuff just for boys either to be honest.

I'm just worried that the barbers won't be experienced with his longer hair.

I am normally not either, but when it comes to anything that has to do with the body, there are differences. And that includes hair for me.

Go to a couple of barbershops and ask, have a look. You can just walk by and look through the window to see if you see men with longer hair. It's much more common for men to have long(er) hair nowadays than 40 years ago. Most important: Your son has to be happy with it. From this age, your opinion on his hair is going to matter less and less to him and maybe it's time for you to take a step back. Let him make mistakes with his hair. It will grow back.
No barber or hairdresser will give you a pixie cut if you tell them just trim the edges.

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

I am normally not either, but when it comes to anything that has to do with the body, there are differences. And that includes hair for me.

Go to a couple of barbershops and ask, have a look. You can just walk by and look through the window to see if you see men with longer hair. It's much more common for men to have long(er) hair nowadays than 40 years ago. Most important: Your son has to be happy with it. From this age, your opinion on his hair is going to matter less and less to him and maybe it's time for you to take a step back. Let him make mistakes with his hair. It will grow back.
No barber or hairdresser will give you a pixie cut if you tell them just trim the edges.

My husband is saying he needs to go to his barbers and no where else

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

I'm going to the salon for my hair this morning, so might ask my hairdresser if she thinks a barbers would be able to manage his long hair properly

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

I'd say that he probably should not go to the barber at this time *if* he and his father get into conflicts over his hair length; this is a tactic sometimes used by men who want their long-haired sons to get short haircuts -- they hope to use the peer pressure of the all-male atmosphere of a barber shop to get the kid to cave under pressure to cut it short. (Also, some barbers simply don't do scissor cutting, so clippers are the only choice there.) If this is the scenario, there is bound to be resentment picked up when the long hair is left on the floor.

If, however, his dad doesn't actually have any issues with son's hair length, then I'd say it's up to the son to choose for the experience, but if he needs a scissor cut and your DH gets a clipper cut, do check in advance that scissor cutting is available.

This is something else that I worry about

 

[kymom99]

My niece works in a salon and cuts both men and women. She cuts my adult son’s hair. Not sure why some people think only women go to salons. My son is an adult now but he got his hair cut wherever we took him. He didn’t care and still doesn’t. He’s 22 now.

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

My niece works in a salon and cuts both men and women. She cuts my adult son’s hair. Not sure why some people think only women go to salons. My son is an adult now but he hit his fair cut wherever we took him. He didn’t care and still doesn’t. He’s 22 now.

Glad it's not just me who thinks this. My husband mentioned this morning that he thinks it'll make him "more of a man" if he goes to the barbers and that he thinks the salon will "make him a girl"!

Yes he has longer hair than most boys but that was entirely his choice

 

[Miffy]

OP, I realize this has already been said several times on this thread, but I'm going to say it again anyway: Ask your son what he wants. Do not assume anything. Just because he doesn't complain about the hairdresser and/or ask for a change doesn't mean anything.

Ask him directly: Son, what do you want to do about your hair? Hairdresser or barber or something else?

And then abide by his decision, no matter what you or your husband thinks of it.

At 13, your son's feelings and opinions about his own hair should be honored.

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

OP, I realize this has already been said several times on this thread, but I'm going to say it again anyway: Ask your son what he wants. Do not assume anything. Just because he doesn't complain about the hairdresser and/or ask for a change doesn't mean anything.

Ask him directly: Son, what do you want to do about your hair? Hairdresser or barber or something else?

And then abide by his decision, no matter what you or your husband thinks of it.

At 13, your son's feelings and opinions about his own hair should be honored.

I have asked him and he's said he doesn't know

 

[Miffy]

I have asked him and he's said he doesn't know

I see. Yet it's still up to him. Maybe this would be a good opportunity to encourage (not force) him to make a decision for himself, especially about something as significant as his hair.

ETA: If he really doesn't want to decide, then make sure he's happy with the way things currently are. If he is, then it seems like you should continue to go to the hairdresser. There's nothing "unmanly" about that at all.

 

[RedAngie]

After reading all of OP’s replies, I get the impression that her husband is more concerned about what HIS friends, co-workers, or father might say or think about the son still going to a “Beauty Parlor.”

Most salons have male customers of all ages and hair lengths. The stylists there are trained enough to do everything from a buzzcut to a perm for men.

Ask hubby why he is so adamant about your son switching to a barber. I bet he can give no good reason and might try to avoid answering.

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

After reading all of OP’s replies, I get the impression that her husband is more concerned about what HIS friends, co-workers, or father might say or think about the son still going to a “Beauty Parlor.”

Most salons have male customers of all ages and hair lengths. The stylists there are trained enough to do everything from a buzzcut to a perm for men.

Ask hubby why he is so adamant about your son switching to a barber. I bet he can give no good reason and might try to avoid answering.

I will ask my husband and see what he says

 

[Amyisalwayshappy]

After reading all of OP’s replies, I get the impression that her husband is more concerned about what HIS friends, co-workers, or father might say or think about the son still going to a “Beauty Parlor.”

Most salons have male customers of all ages and hair lengths. The stylists there are trained enough to do everything from a buzzcut to a perm for men.

Ask hubby why he is so adamant about your son switching to a barber. I bet he can give no good reason and might try to avoid answering.

Just spoken to him and he refused to answer and walked away saying he had "something else to do" and then just sat down on his phone

 

[RedAngie]

Just spoken to him and he refused to answer and walked away saying he had "something else to do" and then just sat down on his phone

Just as I suspected. Can’t give a valid reason.