Guests paying to attend birthday party. Is this a growing trend?

[ang]

Is the admission fee instead of a gift? I guess I don't see a difference between buying a gift during elementary school and paying towards admission in high school. BUT, I wouldn't do both. You get the same $10-$15 from me (us) either way, however you want that $15 is your choice. Now the parent who is asking for $20 either needs to scale down the party or contribute more.

This is my line of thinking...pay addmission but should not have to pay for snack...
Ok I had a birthday for me...lol my 40th, asked everyone if they wanted to go to laser tag with us they would have to pay their own way and please no gifts.. I also provide all the food and snacks.( I come from a family of 10) Everyone loved this idea. We had a blast.

 

[LuvCuteBoys]

Why are the parents not teaching their children this is rude??

Because not everyone feels it IS rude.

I guess I kind of look at as similar to a group of friends taking someone out for their birthday. I don't know about everyone else, but I do this all the time. We might treat a coworker to lunch, or my sisters and I go out for one sister's birthday and pay for her, or a group of friends meet for dinner and we cover the birthday person's cost. I don't get why this is different because it's teens.

Also someone mentioned these are "expensive parties". Other than the aquarium sleepover I think things like movies or going out to a place like Chili's or TGIF are normal teen weekend activities. The kids just treat their friend for their birthday.

Also a lot of the responses have been about younger kids, people mention calling the parents, etc. I would be interested to know if other parents of high schoolers organize their kids' weekend activities.

I don't think what the OP described (going to the movies, a $10 bowling night, etc.) qualifies as a big party. Do you? Especially as it is probably a reciprocal type of thing, where the group goes out for each person's birthday so each person gets treated to a night out. I actually think it's kind of nice for teens to get together socially and celebrate someone's birthday.

Does a group of friends treating another friend to dinner for their birthday really create a sense of entitlement?

I agree with you on both posts.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

I think the bolded part is what rubs me the wrong way. I'm one of the weird ones that think you shouldn't get married unless you are financially stable. I give money when my relatives and friends graduate college, to me that's when you are really starting out in life. I rarely ever give cash or gift cards, otherwise. I enjoy choosing the perfect gifts for people.

I have to say I love the fact that I have a full set of china, silver and crystal, received from my wedding registry. I do use them at dinner parties, holidays, etc.

Most brides here get nearly everything from their registry prior to the wedding (engagement and shower gifts). Monetary wedding gifts are not used to pay for the wedding itself, either the parents pay for the wedding or often the couple pays for the wedding if they are financially much better off than their parents.

The money is usually put in the bank.

 

[chloelovesdisney]

I agree:

I guess to me, it depends on whether a gift is still expected.

When I got to high school, kids would stop having "birthday parties," but we'd often get together to celebrate someone's birthday. Usually everyone would pay for themselves, and maybe kick in a couple of bucks to cover the birthday person's cost...but no gifts were given.

Usually, it was a friend of the birthday person who organized it, not the birthday person him/herself... and usually we had to find our own way there (rides not provided). The fact that the birthday-person's parents are providing transportation is pretty nice.

If it's a true "birthday party" (gifts expected) then I agree it's tacky, but if it's a teen get-together (come celebrate with me), then I don't have a problem with it.