monuv8im,
Please remember when reading this post that I am only the messenger here and have nothing to gain either way.
I have now been in contact with the owner, who had never heard of disboards. Some of the key points you raised in your original post differ from their version. It is also slightly worrying that you have now changed your original post yesterday to remove key paragraphs and added in a new paragraph.
Every owner deals with bookings differently but it is common that once a guest states they are wanting to book then the dates are 'held' for a short period whilst the deposit is made. You can imagine the fall out if a guest states they wanted to book and then gets disappointed due to the fact that another guest beat them to paying the deposit.
Your biggest problem seems to be that the owner cashed your check. From the information he has given me it was impossible for him not to cash the check, because whilst he was in the UK, the booking form which you completed and returned via email, requested the check to be sent directly to Suntrust's processing center in the US, so on receipt it was automatically processed. The terms and conditions did state that the deposit was non-refundable, but on cancellation this would be refunded less $100 admin fee once the dates are rebooked. Some owners don't refund any deposit if the booking is cancelled even if they manage to rebook the period.
The owner has already re-confirmed the money will be refunded (less admin fee) once the dates are re-booked, as you have now added to your original post, this is a busy period and therefore a booking should be forthcoming in due course.
It is obvious that there has been a breakdown in confidence but from talking to the owner, I am not sure if this was the reason for cancelling. I think it would be best to open up a dialogue with the owner, to ask that he keeps you updated when he issues booking forms for your dates. This way you can at least understand that they are actively marketing your cancelled dates in the attempt to obtain a new booking to refund your money.
I really hope that the owner finds a booking so that he can then refund you, so that from your position the problem goes away. I cannot see what else I can do to help and hopefully I won't be flamed by other readers of this post for making this reply
Paul