Going to Kindergarten w/o preschool experience

[WeLoveLilo05]

DD did not go to preschool but will be going to K in the fall. Was wondering if anyone else had this experience with their little one, and how did he/she do? DD knows her alphabet, shapes, colors, can identify numbers, can count to 20, she can write her first name. We are working on writing letters and phonics. The program here is only half day.

 

[Silly Little Pixie]

As a kindergarten teacher for 6 years (now a 3rd grade teacher), I think she'll be fine. It sounds like she has some basic skills. Be sure she is comfortable with being left there, without you. If she has any neighborhood friends who will be attending as well, be sure to have some playdates before school begins. That will help a little with first-day jitters to have a familiar face! It's also important that she knows how to share, (or at least has some experience with it!) and listen to an adult other than family. You'd be surprised how hard that is for some kids! VBS, Sunday School, city arts or rec programs, etc can all provide that. If you can make it sound so exciting and fun, your DD will look forward to it. Don't say things that might scare her, or worry about how she will fare where she might overhear. Meet the teacher on any preview days, or just walk around the school in the day or two before school starts. Take the time to see if she can see the classroom before "the big day". That helps the anxiety for a lot of kids.

I wouldn't worry too much about the lack of preschool experience. I taught kindergarten and I sent my own kids only to 2 days a week of preschool, the school year before they started K. I just wanted them to have some socialization in a bigger group, listening to the teacher, etc. They were fine and I'm sure your DD will be too!

And don't let her see you cry!!! You can commiserate with all the other parents in the parking lot. Best wishes for both of you!

 

[Mom-to-2-Princesses]

My child's best friend in Kindergarten didn't go to preschool. She did great and now in 8th grade has had a 4.o all semesters. It sounds like your child is very bright and has the basic education stuff down.

Like SillyLittlePixie said, the social and classroom rules will be the biggest "learning curve" for her. My daughter's friend was rather shy at first and afraid to talk to the teacher -- she wasn't as comfortable with teachers as some of the other kids. A teacher is *very* different than a mom in their eyes! But she adjusted very quickly. With half day K you and your daughter will do fine.

 

[SnowWhite607]

As a kindergarten teacher for 6 years (now a 3rd grade teacher), I think she'll be fine. It sounds like she has some basic skills. Be sure she is comfortable with being left there, without you. If she has any neighborhood friends who will be attending as well, be sure to have some playdates before school begins. That will help a little with first-day jitters to have a familiar face! It's also important that she knows how to share, (or at least has some experience with it!) and listen to an adult other than family. You'd be surprised how hard that is for some kids! VBS, Sunday School, city arts or rec programs, etc can all provide that. If you can make it sound so exciting and fun, your DD will look forward to it. Don't say things that might scare her, or worry about how she will fare where she might overhear. Meet the teacher on any preview days, or just walk around the school in the day or two before school starts. Take the time to see if she can see the classroom before "the big day". That helps the anxiety for a lot of kids.

I wouldn't worry too much about the lack of preschool experience. I taught kindergarten and I sent my own kids only to 2 days a week of preschool, the school year before they started K. I just wanted them to have some socialization in a bigger group, listening to the teacher, etc. They were fine and I'm sure your DD will be too!

And don't let her see you cry!!! You can commiserate with all the other parents in the parking lot. Best wishes for both of you!

I teach K also and I would have to agree with the above. I have taught children who have neve rbeen to school before and although it takes them a little longer to catch on to the rules and such, they are none the worse for wear. She should do fine!

 

[golfgal]

I agree that it won't really be an issue as long as she knows how to behave. Just curious, why didn't she go to preschool?

 

[java]

I have a preschooler heading off to Kindergarten. Sounds like she is along the proper line with what she should know going in. My son is doing a bit more but he's been in school for 2 years.
Really it was more of the socialization for him. He was VERY attatched to me. And I am sure she will too once she gets there. Don't worry. I'm sure she'll do fine.
My older son has a friend that didn't go to preschool- he was a little quieter in K. Not as social. Had a harder time sharing. But now in 1st he's right in line with everyone else.

 

[PollyannaMom]

A girl in DS's class back in K had not gone to preschool, and she did just fine - very good student, and no problem adjusting to being away from home. Her Mom just took her to storytime at the library and stuff to get her ready to be in large group of kids.

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

my DD12 did not go to pre-school and is now on the honor roll! She did go to a half day summer program for a couple weeks each year at the elementary. She did start out a little behind, but had no trouble catching up.

 

[NY Disney fan]

DD knows her alphabet, shapes, colors, can identify numbers, can count to 20, she can write her first name.

I have heard other kindergarten teaachers say the best things a small child should know are not what you mentioned above. The most important things that parents take for granted are teaching their kids to:

- use the bathroom
- wash their hands
- tie or velcro their shoes
- put on a jacket
- know their address/phone

Make sure she knows the basics of these too!!

 

[HelenePA]

another thing they should know is how to use scissors in preschool they use them a few times a day here. She'll be fine. I didn't send my girls to preschool. My first grader is straight A's and is student of the month this month

 

[skuttle]

One of the kids in DS's K class last year didn't go to any type of preschool or even daycare. He really struggled and needed a lot of extra help. I don't think his mom worked with him at all from what she told me. I think they all (her and her two sons) just stayed at home and played all day. Our K is all day, so it was probably even worse for him. Sounds like you have been working with your DD so I bet she'll be fine.

 

[puffkin]

I have heard other kindergarten teaachers say the best things a small child should know are not what you mentioned above. The most important things that parents take for granted are teaching their kids to:

- use the bathroom
- wash their hands
- tie or velcro their shoes
- put on a jacket
- know their address/phone

Make sure she knows the basics of these too!!

I agree I think the biggest thing they learn in Preschool is how to be independent. I would add to that list being able to feed themselves without assistance (ie opening lunch packages, no need to cut up food, etc) and cleaning themselves up (putting things away, wiping up messy hands, etc). My son is also very adaptable to changing conditions (different teachers, kids etc). The day is very structured, but there are a lot of variables that he has learned to adjust to.

I would also work on counting higher. My DS just turned 4 (so still in the 3 year old room) and they are working on counting up to 50. By kindergarten he will be up to 100. They also do basic math (addition, subtraction). He knows all the shapes, including octagons and crescent circles and things like that. They are starting to work on basic word recognition. They use scissors daily. They are expected to start coloring in the lines (within reason). He can easiy write his name and most of the letters and numbers. It is amazing how much he can do now and he has another year of preschool to go. I would say he is already about on par with what I did in Kidnergarten 25 years ago.

 

[Pikester]

It all depends on the kid. My older son (DS12) did not go to preschool. We would have had to pay for that and could not afford it at the time(I was a SAHM so only DH was working). He had no problems with the academics(does very,very well in school) or the social aspects of Kindergarten. He's also very independent so no crying for him when I dropped him of for the first day. It was "Bye Mom!"

My younger son (DS8) has speech and hearing issues so he attended preschool based on an IEP and it was paid for by the school district. Academically he's average but socially he had a hard time with transitioning and listening to teachers so preschool was a good thing for him. He is a clingy child so there was no "Bye Mom!" for him.

There was no mandatory Kinder for a long time around here(until 2009) so many kids first experience with school was 1st grade. You can see the difference in the children mostly with listening to the teacher and following the rules. It depends on how involved the parents were in teaching their kids the basics as to how equal they will be with their classmates.

Sounds like you are doing a great job with your daughter and she will do fine.

 

[jfranklyn]

My son has a little girl in his 1st grade class who didn't attend preschool. She's a disaster. But not educationally, I don't think. I think she knows her "stuff". But she can't listen to rules, stay in her seat, stop touching other kids, stop stealing other kids stuff and taking it home with her, talking while the teacher is talking, etc.

She "boasts" to the other kids in class that she was "preschool homeschooled".

Assuming that your child knows how to obey the rules of a classroom, he/she should do just fine with the skills they have so far.

 

[4nana]

Lots of great advise here!

I agree, if your DD has the basics down she adjust fine . I’ve had my little DGS since he 2 mos old and he just started pre school 3x full days a week this Jan. Altho he has older siblings, kids classes at church, story hour at library, he’s enjoying the pre school social interaction and adjusted well to his teacher and new rules.

Like your DD, we don’t anticipate any problems in KG. We also do hooked on phonics, altho it is not a requirement for pre-school, he is having fun reading basics. I am also glad we exposed him to educational activities on computer, as it is introduced in our preschools.

BTW ~ back in the day, none of our 4 kids went to pre-school.... imagine that !
They were all in Honor Society and graduated in Top 5-10 of their HS classes and also with honors in college.

Trust she'll do fine, it all begins at home with caring, loving, attentive parents and you've got a great start!

 

[buckler]

A girl in DS's class back in K had not gone to preschool, and she did just fine - very good student, and no problem adjusting to being away from home. Her Mom just took her to storytime at the library and stuff to get her ready to be in large group of kids.

If we lived in the same state I'd think you were talking about my kids
We went to a lot of activities such as library story times and moms' club playgroups to get some socialization. Otherwise, their first day of kindergarten was their first school experience. They are both doing fine academically and socially. My oldest was reading at a 2nd grade level by the time she started kindergarten (I never TRIED to teach her to read, I just read to her a lot and one day she shocked us by starting to read 1st grade level books on her own!). My younger child wasn't as interested in reading and learned to read in kindergarten. Now she loves reading too.

 

[FoundMyPrince]

Our children didn't attend pre-school and did just fine in elementary school. I have stayed home with our children until they attend public school and have taught them the skills you (OP) mentioned. I'm sure your child will do very well.

 

[disfan07]

As a PP said, its not as much about academics. That's what a lot of parents seem to be pointing out here. How their kids have straight As, Top of the class, honors, etc.

In being prepared for kindergarten, academics is very important now, but learning to be independent and to socialize is more what the benefits of preschool are.

As other people have said...

Can she take directions from adults other than family?
can she tie/velcro her own shoes?
can she put on her jacket?
is she completely independent in the bathroom?
can she clean up her own mess (art supplies, snacks, lunches, etc)
wash her hands
can she pay attentionfor an extended period of time (stroytime, classroom instruction, etc)

At home, you can obviously work on most of these but if she does not take directions well from other adults, or she cannnot pay attention for an extended period of time, she might have more problems because those are 2 of the biggest things we emphsize in preschool.
Where I used to work, we were a play based preschool adn we said the biggest things we emphsized were:
sharing
listening
independence
patience

 

[WeLoveLilo05]

I agree that it won't really be an issue as long as she knows how to behave. Just curious, why didn't she go to preschool?

There were various reasons why she did not attend preschool, sorry if this is TMI:
the major one being potty issues, she would not go #2 and refused the undies! She was getting constipated (this lasted a very long time, she was constantly on miralax), we ended up at GI Drs b/c she wouldn't even go #2 at all even in the diaper! It was terrible, I felt so bad for her! So sad to go through. We laid off the whole potty thing, and finally 3 weeks ago she decided she just wanted undies and was fully potty trained and knock on wood, hasn't been constipated.

She also has a peanut allergy, I hope the school will be able to accommodate.

Preschool is not free here in NJ.

And finally....everyone is going to laugh, but I just finished student teaching...with a kindergarten. I asked b/c my co-op teacher CONSTANTLY stressed the importance of putting her in some kind of preschool. She said to put her in January, she needs it. It really got me stressed and upset. She would constantly label those who did not go to pre-k that were in her class as her "low" ones. The reason I stress the peanut allergy thing too is b/c my co-op teacher was ALWAYS using foods in the classroom! We had a lil one with peanut and milk allergies and everyday someone was bringing in something and she couldn't have it, which was sad. One day co-op teacher handed her a cheddar cheese ball and I quickly ran over and said to the little girl, "Honey I am not sure if you could eat that" and I read the label and it contained milk. I told co-op teacher and she said Oh I'll put it in her bookbag to go home, I don't really think her allergy is that severe anyways. They also used foods as math manipulatives (m&ms, which are a no no for milk and peanut allergies, and other junkie foods that I am surprised would even be allowed in the school). It was just sad to watch.

I did not go to pre-K, but a lot has changed in 20 years. When I was student teaching there was also students who were having a hard time with writing their letters and my co-op teacher just couldn't believe it. I think she expected A LOT from them.


Sorry, rant over lol.

 

[kpm76]

There were various reasons why she did not attend preschool, sorry if this is TMI:
the major one being potty issues, she would not go #2 and refused the undies! She was getting constipated (this lasted a very long time, she was constantly on miralax), we ended up at GI Drs b/c she wouldn't even go #2 at all even in the diaper! It was terrible, I felt so bad for her! So sad to go through. We laid off the whole potty thing, and finally 3 weeks ago she decided she just wanted undies and was fully potty trained and knock on wood, hasn't been constipated.

She also has a peanut allergy, I hope the school will be able to accommodate.

Preschool is not free here in NJ.

And finally....everyone is going to laugh, but I just finished student teaching...with a kindergarten. I asked b/c my co-op teacher CONSTANTLY stressed the importance of putting her in some kind of preschool. She said to put her in January, she needs it. It really got me stressed and upset. She would constantly label those who did not go to pre-k that were in her class as her "low" ones. The reason I stress the peanut allergy thing too is b/c my co-op teacher was ALWAYS using foods in the classroom! We had a lil one with peanut and milk allergies and everyday someone was bringing in something and she couldn't have it, which was sad. One day co-op teacher handed her a cheddar cheese ball and I quickly ran over and said to the little girl, "Honey I am not sure if you could eat that" and I read the label and it contained milk. I told co-op teacher and she said Oh I'll put it in her bookbag to go home, I don't really think her allergy is that severe anyways. They also used foods as math manipulatives (m&ms, which are a no no for milk and peanut allergies, and other junkie foods that I am surprised would even be allowed in the school). It was just sad to watch.

I did not go to pre-K, but a lot has changed in 20 years. When I was student teaching there was also students who were having a hard time with writing their letters and my co-op teacher just couldn't believe it. I think she expected A LOT from them.


Sorry, rant over lol.

I feel your pain on the constipation issue! My 2.5 yr old had major issues as well and believe it or not, they ended when she decided to do #2 on the potty. Strange, I know, but for some reason wearing the diaper contributed to the constipation issue......

As for the teachers telling you she NEEDS preschool, I think the issue is that many (most?) kids are in daycare/preschool these days so are trained to listen, follow directions etc from an early age. By the time they reach K, the teacher usually does not have to worry about the "typical" K behavior. Consequently, I think early elem teachers have been conditioned to have certain expectations because of changing times (i.e dual income homes where daycare is the only option). I am not criticizing teachers at all.....they have simply adapted to the new norm. When you get a kid who has had no structured experience, never been away from mom etc, I imagine it can be a nightmare for some.

DD will attend preschool for 2 days/week in Sept and I think she will really benefit. I am not doing it at all for the academic aspect as I feel DH and I have done a good job working with her and will continue to do so, but there are things I cannot teach her like taking direction from another adult who is not family, share with you friends without mom hovering over making sure you do it, sit and listen to the story etc. DD is going to Catholic school and they have full-day pre-K and K so I think putting her in that situation without any preschool would be a complete nightmare for her and the teachers.

I think your DD will be just fine though and I think you had very valid reasons for not sending her