Girls Trip~OLD THREAD (see first post for link to new one)

[VintageDisneyRules]

, because my computer crashed last year and I lost EVERYTHING! I did get some photos uploaded to Photobucket, so I'll look and see what I have.

There are sites that can retreive lost photos. They cost but I heard that they are sucessful.

When are you going in December? We're possibly going to be there December 9 and 10.

Is that Candlelight weekend? I'm hoping to get a trip in in Dec. but want to avoid that weekend. I've seen it twice and the crowds are just unbearable.

 

[grumpyvet]

Amy I don't have any pics of the party that night although we DID attend. I just didn't have my camera at the time they were taking the group shots of all of us. I know Melody got some great pics. I DO have a really nice pic of Dawn and Sally with the rest of the group at our Trattoria lunch if she would like that pic. It is on my facebook and no longer on my computer because it was on my old one and I didn't get the pics transfered over but if someone can copy it off facebook they are welcome to it. I don't know how to do that LOL but I am sure Beth or someone could or would know. Just let me know.

Thankyou Kelly. Sally expressed interested in the Halloween party pictures with Dawn as the White Rabbit particularly, but I will let you know if she has other interests. But thank you ever so for the offer....

Amy! - I'm in contact with Sally too, and what do you know, I have pictures from that night...but not many, because my computer crashed last year and I lost EVERYTHING! I did get some photos uploaded to Photobucket, so I'll look and see what I have.

Thank you also Wendy. If you check Little Churro's wall, Sally sounded so plaintive, tore out my heart.

Dawn springs into my mind here and there, as I am sure she does yours.

Love and light ladies.


AmyOkratheDisgracedSue

 

[DizNee Luver]

Hi Ladies, yesterday was rough at my stepmom's memorial. For those of you that have step-parents or you're a step-parent/grandparent.......a question??

Do you look at the step as family?? Do you look at the child/grandchildren as being your partners kids & grandkids or do you see them as "your" children/grandchildren.

My stepmom always introduced us as Roy's (my dad) kids & grandkids. It always bugged me....my kids always knew her as grandma.

We went to the memorial & my step-sisters almost seemed surprised we came to her service. She had been married to my dad for 37 yrs......that's a huge chunk of my life & all of my kids lives. Of course we would be there. But it became very obvious that our side of the family didn't really exist/matter in her life. Not one picture, not one slide, not one mention.....it's like we weren't part of her life. My kids were devistated by the loss of their grandmother but when they talked about grandkids......ours weren't included.

I took this very hard & it made a lot of emotions really raw.....37 yrs and all we were to her & her kids were Roy's family.......so sad!!

Just wondering if that's how others view the step issue??

 

[BC Disney Lover]

Mom and I will be there the 3-5. It's CP weekend, so I'm expecting crowds. But that's the only time we could make it work. If your plans change, please let me know.

Tina, We're going that same weekend. It's the only time that would work for DH's work and it's my sons birthday on the Friday. Have you been there during the CP before? We're expecting crowds but would love any other tips or suggestions you have for getting the most out of that weekend. I'll be keeping an eye out for you!

 

[sierranevada]

Hi Ladies, yesterday was rough at my stepmom's memorial. For those of you that have step-parents or you're a step-parent/grandparent.......a question??

Do you look at the step as family?? Do you look at the child/grandchildren as being your partners kids & grandkids or do you see them as "your" children/grandchildren.

My stepmom always introduced us as Roy's (my dad) kids & grandkids. It always bugged me....my kids always knew her as grandma.

We went to the memorial & my step-sisters almost seemed surprised we came to her service. She had been married to my dad for 37 yrs......that's a huge chunk of my life & all of my kids lives. Of course we would be there. But it became very obvious that our side of the family didn't really exist/matter in her life. Not one picture, not one slide, not one mention.....it's like we weren't part of her life. My kids were devistated by the loss of their grandmother but when they talked about grandkids......ours weren't included.

I took this very hard & it made a lot of emotions really raw.....37 yrs and all we were to her & her kids were Roy's family.......so sad!!

Just wondering if that's how others view the step issue??

Laurie - so sorry that happened. My thoughts, as I also have an extended blended family - sister, brother, step-mom, step-sisters, half-sister, half-brother, step-nieces & nephews and an adopted nephew for 30+ years. I think blended families always have a little of the yours, mine and ours feeling, no matter how much everyone loves each other. But I think that the ability to overcome that and make it truly work is a testament to the good in all of us. Sometimes it is hard to remember all that in the wake of a tragedy.

My father died very unexpectedly last Feb. And in the shock of it, all the phone calls, emotional support, etc. was with my siblings and half-sibs and, of course, my step-mom. We didn't consciously leave out step-sisters but in the first few days/week circled the wagons out of grief for "our" father. I put it in quotes because he was as much a father to my step-sisters as he was to us. We definitely included my step-sisters and their kids in the planning of the small family memorial but didn't realize the impact he had on them until one incident that opened my eyes. We were preparing some memory boxes with stickers of things that reminded us of my dad when my step-sister burst into tears over an ice cream sticker. She was remembering all the times my dad took her for ice cream after school. It made me ashamed that I had felt my grief was more important than theirs.

My step-mom also use to introduce us as "Dick's kids" but I knew she always loved us. After my father's death, she actually put into words that she considers my sister, brother and I to be her kids. Sometimes it takes a tragedy to make people think.

What I really want to say is that I don't think your step-mom's biological family meant to exclude you but was just thoughtless. I know it doesn't make the pain any less, but know in your heart that your step-mom loved you.

My thoughts are with you. The loss will always be there but it does fade. Hold onto your memories and let the hurt go - believe me, I know how hard that is. Memorials are so emotional and don't always bring out the best in families. Just be the great person that you are and make sure that your kids know how much their grandmother loved them.

 

[DizNee Luver]

Thanx Bridget!! I appreciate having another view of things. I think what really bugged me was them being surprised I would go to the memorial.....why wouldn't I?? I really feel they all (including my stepmom where they learned this behavior) just looked at us at Dad's kids/grandkids...that's just sad. I told one of my stepsister's that my older boys (who spent the most time with them) where devistated in losing their grandma....she looked at me like...ok?? Kinda surprised that my boys would have feelings for her. Just a very strange dynamic. I'm pretty sure not one of them will be there for us when our dad passes....since they view things very differently.

Just need to work thru all this & move forward....I can't change things but it did really open my eyes that our family was definitely divided on that side & we'll probably not see them again. So I not only lost my stepmom, but also 4 stepsisters & 1 stepbrother....all at once.

Thanx again!!

 

[sierranevada]

Thanx Bridget!! I appreciate having another view of things. I think what really bugged me was them being surprised I would go to the memorial.....why wouldn't I?? I really feel they all (including my stepmom where they learned this behavior) just looked at us at Dad's kids/grandkids...that's just sad. I told one of my stepsister's that my older boys (who spent the most time with them) where devistated in losing their grandma....she looked at me like...ok?? Kinda surprised that my boys would have feelings for her. Just a very strange dynamic. I'm pretty sure not one of them will be there for us when our dad passes....since they view things very differently.

Just need to work thru all this & move forward....I can't change things but it did really open my eyes that our family was definitely divided on that side & we'll probably not see them again. So I not only lost my stepmom, but also 4 stepsisters & 1 stepbrother....all at once.

Thanx again!!

Yes, it is a strange dynamic. We always did Christmas at my house here in CA every other year. When my dad died, my sister and I were wondering if we would still do Christmas here and if my step-family would come. We did do it last year - honestly, it was a little odd since my Dad was the glue that bound us. But it was really cathartic and brought us closer together. Not sure how it will play out in the future. It does take a conscious effort to keep in touch and I can see that it would be easy to just let it slide.

Hang in there, lady!

 

[LisaCat]

We went to the memorial & my step-sisters almost seemed surprised we came to her service. She had been married to my dad for 37 yrs......that's a huge chunk of my life & all of my kids lives. Of course we would be there. But it became very obvious that our side of the family didn't really exist/matter in her life. Not one picture, not one slide, not one mention.....it's like we weren't part of her life. My kids were devistated by the loss of their grandmother but when they talked about grandkids......ours weren't included.

Wow....

I went to my step-dad's memorial and he had only been married to my mom for 4 years, 1996-2000. I can't imagine them thinking you wouldn't come and to leave your kids out is really sad.

My family isn't close AT. ALL. but still.... I've got a sister you can have..... she even lives in OR..... and my Mom would LOVE some grandkids..... just sayin. LOL

 

[DizNee Luver]

Wow....

I went to my step-dad's memorial and he had only been married to my mom for 4 years, 1996-2000. I can't imagine them thinking you wouldn't come and to leave your kids out is really sad.

My family isn't close AT. ALL. but still.... I've got a sister you can have..... she even lives in OR..... and my Mom would LOVE some grandkids..... just sayin. LOL

Thanx Lisa!! They really made us feel like outsiders. Wasn't expecting it to be so cut & dried.....hers & his!!

 

[lulubelle]

On step families....it's hard. Very hard. When the family member who bonded the two families together dies, it's difficult to redefine relationships, isn't it?

I am the step mother. DH had two children before we married and they were never like my children. His DD is only 11 years my junior and his son is 15 years younger. His DD moved out the first year we were married and we never got along. Ever. I helped raise his son and we had a good relationship but it was always "Chris' son" and I was "Chris' wife". I love my stepson, but not as a son, does that make sense? When my DH passed away last year, we talked and cried together, I felt closer to him than I had in years. I have invited them to my house a few times and they have never come. He has never collected any artifacts or items from his childhood that we saved over the years. I have them ready for him and thought he would like to have them. He told a mutual friend it's too "weird" to come to my house without his dad here. I did have dinner with his son and family at Christmas time. It was kind of awkward, but I am glad I made the effort. And no, I do not consider his grandkids my grandkids. It's just the way it always was and still is. His kids were always jealous of Bree and never liked her. Like I said, it is very hard and we all do the best we can do.

I also had a step mother who passed away (she and my dad were married 35 years). Both sides of the family got together for the service and we reminisced like we were kids again, but we don't keep in touch now. They rarely contact my dad. It's a divided family.

So, don't be upset Laurie. Every family member feels differently and we all adjust somehow. You and your family loved her and are mourning her loss. You cannot be responsible for their feelings. Hugs and pixie dust to you. I am so sorry for your loss.

 

[lulubelle]

On a happier note....Beth's birthday weekend was a blast!
The birthday girl was beautiful as usual and her dinner party was a success. It was so nice to see everyone (especially my twin Capri ) and the Halloween Party was fun.

I am home and exhausted but really enjoyed my time with friends.

Amy, so nice to see you here. I know Bree has a few pictures for Sally. I don't own a camera so I am of no help, but I will ask Bree to send them to her. We had a blanket made and sent to Sally when Dawn passed and I know some of the Halloween pictures were on it. It turned out really cute.

I hope everyone enjoys the rest of their weekend.

 

[DizNee Luver]

On step families....it's hard. Very hard. When the family member who bonded the two families together dies, it's difficult to redefine relationships, isn't it?

I am the step mother. DH had two children before we married and they were never like my children. His DD is only 11 years my junior and his son is 15 years younger. His DD moved out the first year we were married and we never got along. Ever. I helped raise his son and we had a good relationship but it was always "Chris' son" and I was "Chris' wife". I love my stepson, but not as a son, does that make sense? When my DH passed away last year, we talked and cried together, I felt closer to him than I had in years. I have invited them to my house a few times and they have never come. He has never collected any artifacts or items from his childhood that we saved over the years. I have them ready for him and thought he would like to have them. He told a mutual friend it's too "weird" to come to my house without his dad here. I did have dinner with his son and family at Christmas time. It was kind of awkward, but I am glad I made the effort. And no, I do not consider his grandkids my grandkids. It's just the way it always was and still is. His kids were always jealous of Bree and never liked her. Like I said, it is very hard and we all do the best we can do.

I also had a step mother who passed away (she and my dad were married 35 years). Both sides of the family got together for the service and we reminisced like we were kids again, but we don't keep in touch now. They rarely contact my dad. It's a divided family.

So, don't be upset Laurie. Every family member feels differently and we all adjust somehow. You and your family loved her and are mourning her loss. You cannot be responsible for their feelings. Hugs and pixie dust to you. I am so sorry for your loss.

Thank you so much Linda!! Its good for me to hear how others that are blended families look & feel about things. I guess to me, family is family no matter when they joined. But I'm very sentimental, emotional & family oriented. Eventhough I lived with my mom, when I visited, I respected my stepmom as a 2nd mom when I was a kid. My kids didn't get too interested in the "step" aspect. When they were born, both my parents were remarried, so they all were grandparents.

I appreciate everyone that's commenting on this, as it really is helping me put things in perspective. Linda, your comment on not being responsible for their feelings was spot on. I shouldn't lose sleep for something I can't be in control of......as the song says "I can't make you love me....if you don't".

Thanx again!!

 

[Happy 2 B Me]

Laurie, such a shame that happened. Unhappy souls do mean things. Not sure I would want or miss any interaction with the step-family. Poor little Addy . It is also a shame for your 3 oldest were ignored. Hope karma comes to bite them in the tooshies, big bites . Stay strong .

 

[DizNee Luver]

Laurie, such a shame that happened. Unhappy souls do mean things. Not sure I would want or miss any interaction with the step-family. Poor little Addy . It is also a shame for your 3 oldest were ignored. Hope karma comes to bite them in the tooshies, big bites . Stay strong .

I don't wish any ill-will on them......things just became very clear.....all these years I thought it was something else....now I know!!

 

[MrsPinup]

Good morning!!
He should be ok. This weekend we were in the 90's, but today and the rest of this week we are supposed to drop down to low to mid 80's. Way better than the triple digits found over summer!

It was way too hot for us! lol Vegas was a blast despite the heat, but I am bummed we didn't get a chance to meet up Saturday night my friends Malissa and Kendall took us to dinner at The Foundation Room in Mandalay Bay where we had a private room for dinner - probably the fanciest and best food I have ever eaten - and two bottles of champagne, and more pineapple upside down cakes (a shot) than I should have had. Kendall kept making the drinks keep coming. Sunday morning I was not feeling too good and we had to check out by 10am. ugh! Luckily, a walk down the strip, saltines, and a lot of water had me feeling much better by lunch.

I hope all of you Diva's are having a blast! I wish I could have been there! Next year!!!! This past week was Homecoming week at my school and we had some awesome dress up days. Tuesday was Tacky Tourist day so I put on my minnie shirt, zebra mouse ears, all my lanyards and pins, a disney backpack with my hidden mickey book and mouse ears books, and a fanny pack with park maps and an autograph book. The students kept harrassing me because Thursday was Disney Day. That day I wore my Sleeping Beauty costume. It was a lot of fun.

 

[DizNee Luver]

WELCOME HOME DIVAS!!!

Enjoyed seeing pics pop up on Facebook from what looked like a fantastic weekend!!!! As you can see on the thread.....we missed you....it was way to quiet in here!!

Looking forward to hearing about all the fun stuff you did!!!

Hope everyone has a good week!!

 

[VintageDisneyRules]

Hi Ladies, yesterday was rough at my stepmom's memorial. For those of you that have step-parents or you're a step-parent/grandparent.......a question??

Do you look at the step as family?? Do you look at the child/grandchildren as being your partners kids & grandkids or do you see them as "your" children/grandchildren.

We have no step's or halves in my family but I've never cared for the terms. When ever I hear someone refering to a child as their step child it just bugs me. If you are in a blended family why use those terms? Just my feelings but it seems like it would make a child feeling like they arent 100% part of the family.

 

[DizNee Luver]

We have no step's or halves in my family but I've never cared for the terms. When ever I hear someone refering to a child as their step child it just bugs me. If you are in a blended family why use those terms? Just my feelings but it seems like it would make a child feeling like they arent 100% part of the family.

I feel that way too.....but I'm touchy on things like that with all our adopted kids & me being adopted too. Family's is family in my book. My boys never felt any different about the "step" grandparents.....to them, they were just grandparents.

 

[BillyFan]

Tina, We're going that same weekend. It's the only time that would work for DH's work and it's my sons birthday on the Friday. Have you been there during the CP before? We're expecting crowds but would love any other tips or suggestions you have for getting the most out of that weekend. I'll be keeping an eye out for you!

We'll have to plan to meet up, Angie! I think we might have a couple of other girls around that weekend, too. I haven't been during CP weekend in a few years, but I do remember it being really crowded near the front of the park in the evening. We just avoided that area, used FP wisely, and went on our merry way!

Laurie~I just wanted to say that my dad's parents divorced and both remarried while I was young, so I grew up with an extra set of grandparents. My dad's mom has since passed, but my grandpa still has dinner with my parents every week, celebrates holidays with us, etc. I'm sorry you don't have the same relationship with your extended family, but you are lucky to have the large family you do have. Love and enjoy them, and don't worry about the way others act.

 

[DizNee Luver]

We'll have to plan to meet up, Angie! I think we might have a couple of other girls around that weekend, too. I haven't been during CP weekend in a few years, but I do remember it being really crowded near the front of the park in the evening. We just avoided that area, used FP wisely, and went on our merry way!

Laurie~I just wanted to say that my dad's parents divorced and both remarried while I was young, so I grew up with an extra set of grandparents. My dad's mom has since passed, but my grandpa still has dinner with my parents every week, celebrates holidays with us, etc. I'm sorry you don't have the same relationship with your extended family, but you are lucky to have the large family you do have. Love and enjoy them, and don't worry about the way others act.

Thanx Tina!! I'm very fortunate to have a wonderful family...just thought it was a little bit bigger.....lol We'll just move forward & know we loved freely!