funeral thank you cards question..

dis2cruise

Long Island, NY
Joined
Aug 21, 1999
Messages
3,433
My father in law passed away suddenly last week :sad2:I know I send a thank you to the following people...

1. people who attended the wake/funeral
2. people who send flowers/donations in his name/people who send or bring food to my house.

however...do I send a thank you to people who just send a sympathy card to my house?
 
I didn't send thank you cards to people who sent a sympathy card only. You have to draw the line somewhere!
 
You know, I always feel badly when someone sends me a thank-you card for anytime I have sent, done or attended a funeral. I know how difficult of a time it is for the survivors and I don't want them working on a thank you card for me. Having said that, I know it is proper etiquette to send notes for flowers, food, or memorials; however, I don't think anyone expects a thank you note for attending or sending a card. Do what you can, but I am sure most people are holding you in their heart and don't expect a written note.
 
For my Dad's we sent thank you's to those that sent flowers, food, or cards and to some extras that did some really helpful or special things. not to everyone who attended the wake and funeral. So, I guess it would be done the way you feel would be most appropriate.

I am very sorry for your loss. I know how hard all this is to deal with.
 

My father in law passed away suddenly last week :sad2:I know I send a thank you to the following people...

1. people who attended the wake/funeral
2. people who send flowers/donations in his name/people who send or bring food to my house.

however...do I send a thank you to people who just send a sympathy card to my house?

My grandma just passed away in May and we did thank you cards for those who sent flowers/donations in her name and those who brought food to the house.

I don't think anyone expects a thank you card (OK, well some people do), but I know when I've sent sympathy cards or attended wakes/funerals, I don't expect a thank you for that.
 
I've never received a thank you for going to calling hours, attending a funeral, or sending a sympathy card.

I don't send flowers, so I can't tell you about that.

I have been thanked for making a donation in someone's memory. When I make a donation, I always send a letter to the charity with my check. In the letter, I give the address of the deceased person's family. If I don't do that, the family might never know that I made the donation, because the charity would have no way to notify them. (Maybe if it's a small town, a local charity might know the family - but if it's a national charity of my choice, they probably won't know the family.)
 
When each of my in-laws passed away, we didn't send thank you notes to people who sent food. We had the receptions at their house so every person who came brought food. We also didn't send thank you notes to people who attended the memorials. We suggested donations to a specific charity in lieu of flowers and the charity notified us each time a donation came in. We did send thank you notes to those people. I never expect a thank you note from a family after I attend a funeral. The family usually thanks people for attending in person and they have enough to deal with without adding thank you notes to the mix.
 
We sent thank you's to everyone who atended the wake and funeral, those who send flowers, those who sent food, those who made donations and those who sent mass cards but tnot the people that just sent sympathy cards. Even with just the others it was well over 300 to send out when my godson died. We got lots of family together and each took a page of the guess book at a time and just wrote and wrote, ate pizza, wrote and wrote, drank beer and wrote and wrote! Got them all done in one long night.
 

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