Frustrated and sad

[jodifla]

It's not a matter of parents wanting more for their children than others. We have a special education law in this country that dictates that EVERY child is entitled to a Free and Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) in the least restrictive environment. This is a federal law named "IDEA", you can research it so that you learn the facts about special education. As a parent of a special needs child, I have spent thousands of dollars on evaluations so that my child can get the services he needs to be able to be a contributing member of society. What are we supposed to do, say oh too bad, so sad, you'll never graduate and become a drug addict and probably end up in jail because in elementary school you never had education presented in a format that was accessable to you? And believe me, typical kids are not going without. With "No Child Left Behind" there is testing to ensure that everyone is learning. This is our childrens' lives and future.

To the OP, I have been where you are. My son now has an out-of-district placement and is completely thriving. Maybe just bringing a lawyer to a meeting will cause the school department to change their tune? I wish you luck and support.

And thank goodness we have this law! You can see what would happen to special education by comments on this thread.

 

[DizBelle]

It's not a matter of parents wanting more for their children than others. We have a special education law in this country that dictates that EVERY child is entitled to a Free and Appropriate Public Education (FAPE) in the least restrictive environment. This is a federal law named "IDEA", you can research it so that you learn the facts about special education. As a parent of a special needs child, I have spent thousands of dollars on evaluations so that my child can get the services he needs to be able to be a contributing member of society. What are we supposed to do, say oh too bad, so sad, you'll never graduate and become a drug addict and probably end up in jail because in elementary school you never had education presented in a format that was accessable to you? And believe me, typical kids are not going without. With "No Child Left Behind" there is testing to ensure that everyone is learning. This is our childrens' lives and future.

To the OP, I have been where you are. My son now has an out-of-district placement and is completely thriving. Maybe just bringing a lawyer to a meeting will cause the school department to change their tune? I wish you luck and support.

I don't think anyone is questioning what is best for any child. Of course, the best thing for any child is an environment in which they can thrive. What is in question is what should be paid for by public tax dollars. We cannot spend an excessive amount on one child relative to others and expect that to be beneficial to society as a whole.

You can't feed all the food to one person out of 30 and expect the others to not be hungry.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

I don't think anyone is questioning what is best for any child. Of course, the best thing for any child is an environment in which they can thrive. What is in question is what should be paid for by public tax dollars. We cannot spend an excessive amount on one child relative to others and expect that to be beneficial to society as a whole.

You can't feed all the food to one person out of 30 and expect the others to not be hungry.

Bravo!!

 

[jodifla]

I don't think anyone is questioning what is best for any child. Of course, the best thing for any child is an environment in which they can thrive. What is in question is what should be paid for by public tax dollars. We cannot spend an excessive amount on one child relative to others and expect that to be beneficial to society as a whole.

You can't feed all the food to one person out of 30 and expect the others to not be hungry.

IDEA has standards that are applied to determine the proper amount of support and money spent and whether children should be in a mainstream classroom or elsewhere. It is NOT a free for all for special education.

There are tons of things my tax dollars go to that I'm not fond of either. Education should be the least of people's concerns when it comes to tax dollar waste.

 

[Nancyg56]

I must say that the OP is not asking for much IMO and that I feel fortunate that our town supports special education for our children. With that said, I have to agree with the poster who sited an example where the child is transported in an ambulance becasue the parent insists that is the best transportation for her child. I cannot even begin to imagine the expense and this is exactly the unreasonable expectation that sends parent like the OP fighting for resources for their kids.

I believe that children deserve an education and would expect all reasonable avenues to be pursued in order to ensure that this happens. However, and again I am not suggesting the OP is one of these parents, the opposite in fact, there are some cases where the town is bankrupted and I wonder where the common sense is in those cases. We have all heard horror stories and it is unfortunate because these few can tarnish the opportunity for all of those others who would benefit from additional services.

Our town supports special programs for children, provides aides and paraprofessionals for children who need them, thank goodness. I have never heard that parents are forced to fight for reasonable assistance for their kids but I think that there will come a time where the cost of one individual's education will wipe out programs that so many children are using. Once this happens the entire program suffers as taxpayers who passed budgets now vote NO, forcing more and more budget cuts. These cuts will not stop special ed but there will be a lot of ill will towards those children's needs............just look at come of the responses on this thread.

I don't know where the line gets drawn when determining a reasonable accomodation and I pray we never find out in my town, but I can understand why some parents resent exhorbitant costs when their kids classes adn programs are cut.

I am 54 so I remember when children were not mainstreamed, no accomodations were made. My neighbor's Mom fought tooth and nail to change that so her son would be able to attend the same classes as his peers and thank God for that. I never wnat to see those days again.

 

[Carly_Roach]

I don't think anyone is questioning what is best for any child. Of course, the best thing for any child is an environment in which they can thrive. What is in question is what should be paid for by public tax dollars. We cannot spend an excessive amount on one child relative to others and expect that to be beneficial to society as a whole.

You can't feed all the food to one person out of 30 and expect the others to not be hungry.

Amen.

 

[SaraJayne]

I don't think anyone is questioning what is best for any child. Of course, the best thing for any child is an environment in which they can thrive. What is in question is what should be paid for by public tax dollars. We cannot spend an excessive amount on one child relative to others and expect that to be beneficial to society as a whole.

You can't feed all the food to one person out of 30 and expect the others to not be hungry.

Mainstreaming is typically beneficial for only one child ~ the one that is getting all the extra resources.

 

[horseshowmom]

Mainstreaming is typically beneficial for only one child ~ the one that is getting all the extra resources.

I understand the perspective many are coming from. I know of a situation where a severely autistic child is mainstreamed at the parents' request. He is accompanied by a paraprofessional at the family's expense (the school offered placement in a classroom devoted to autistic children). In this case, the family is absorbing the cost.

If we were discussing a situation similar to this where the parents were offered one option (the classroom with individuals specially trained to work with autistic students) but refused and wanted a paid aide (paid by the district) to accompany their child so the child could be mainstreamed, I would support the dissenting viewpoint. However, I just do not see where the OP is asking for anything extraordinary by asking for an additional 30 minutes a week and the flexibility to use methods recommended by specialists in the field.

 

[belle&beast]

Mainstreaming is typically beneficial for only one child ~ the one that is getting all the extra resources.

I disagree with this statement. In my experience there are very few children who cannot benefit from being included in some capacity with their peers. I have also seen great compassion and understanding being learned by typical peers and they no longer fear or tease kids for being different due to exposure to differences.

I am not saying that mainstreaming or inclusion is the only way- that's why we develop an Individual Education Plan. It is individualized to ensure that the child's needs are being met.

 

[bluesaturn]

And thank goodness we have this law! You can see what would happen to special education by comments on this thread.

I was a special education minor and I never understood why they focused on IDEA at the beginning of every class. It all seemed very common sense. Seeing some opinions in this thread makes me realize why they actually had to make this a law. It's kind of scary.

 

[Holly]

Mainstreaming is typically beneficial for only one child ~ the one that is getting all the extra resources.

What do you propose as an alternative?

Do you really think it's any cheaper to open a bunch of specialized schools?

I was a special education minor and I never understood why they focused on IDEA at the beginning of every class. It all seemed very common sense. Seeing some opinions in this thread makes me realize why they actually had to make this a law. It's kind of scary.

Agreed.


OP this site has a lot of good info: http://www.wrightslaw.com/


Good luck

 

[castleview]

What do you propose as an alternative?

Do you really think it's any cheaper to open a bunch of specialized schools?




:

I'm guessing she's referring to children who shouldn't be mainstreamed and are a disruption to the class either verbally or physically.

 

[SaraJayne]

I'm guessing she's referring to children who shouldn't be mainstreamed and are a disruption to the class either verbally or physically.

Yes, that is what I am referring to.

The needs of one should not outweigh the needs of many.

 

[belle&beast]

I'm guessing she's referring to children who shouldn't be mainstreamed and are a disruption to the class either verbally or physically.

Yes, that is what I am referring to.

The needs of one should not outweigh the needs of many.

I'm guessing neither of you have ever been part of an IEP meeting. There is a specific portion regarding behavior- in fact we have to specifically check off that the child's behavior does not affect his/her learning or the learning of others. If there are behaviors that would affect ANYONE's learning, there is a process to develop an individualized behavior plan that must be implemented.

 

[castleview]

I'm guessing neither of you have ever been part of an IEP meeting. There is a specific portion regarding behavior- in fact we have to specifically check off that the child's behavior does not affect his/her learning or the learning of others. If there are behaviors that would affect ANYONE's learning, there is a process to develop an individualized behavior plan that must be implemented.

Really? So the kid who hit and spit in my kid's class a few years ago, should be given time to adapt to a new plan that would make him less disruptive to the class while all the other kids have to deal with getting hit or spit at? Sorry, that might be the rule on paper, but it takes a long time to actually do anything about it. Most mainstream parents are nervous about doing it too because then they are accused of not having any compassion.

 

[snarlingcoyote]

If you'd go back and look at the adjusted dollars per capita spent on educating children 60 years ago vs. the money spent today, you'd find that the dollars are about the same.

What has changed in those 60 years is, well. How the pie is distributed and, in some cases, how it is collected (for example, private school tuition vs. taxes).

Whether the changes to how the money is budgeted is good or bad is a matter of an individual's beliefs and views, but that the change to limited funds has occurred is fact.

 

[daughtersrus]

Yes, that is what I am referring to.

The needs of one should not outweigh the needs of many.

I don't think that this answers the question. Do you want specialized schools opened for these children? If so, where is the money going to come from to fund them?

Really? So the kid who hit and spit in my kid's class a few years ago, should be given time to adapt to a new plan that would make him less disruptive to the class while all the other kids have to deal with getting hit or spit at? Sorry, that might be the rule on paper, but it takes a long time to actually do anything about it. Most mainstream parents are nervous about doing it too because then they are accused of not having any compassion.

How do you know that the child has an IEP?

By mainstream parents, do you mean the parents of the child with the IEP?

I never understood why people think the school system should be required to pay for things insurance companies would never do.

Because insurance pays for things that are medically necessary and school districts pay for things that are educationally necessary.

At the risk of sounding harsh, isn't that part of your job as parents? You chose to become parents. Why is it everyone else's (who had no say in the choice) responsiblity?

Isn't that true of all children? Parents choose to have children but yet the taxpayers are responsible for paying for the public schools needed to education them. My neighbors never had children and never will but yet over 60% of their property tax bill goes to the local school district.

Agreed. But there is no way the public can provide for ALL of the needs of ALL children. There are just not enough funds for that. The line has to be drawn somewhere. Public education should provide the best bang for the buck (so to speak). That is what is best for society as a whole.

So then should parents of SpEd students be allowed to divert their tax money away from the public school system and into the education for their child? Parents of these children are already paying huge amounts of money and to now ask them to continue to fund an education system that their child is being excluded from while at the same time having to pay to educate their child just doesn't seem right.

 

[Nancyg56]

Mainstreaming is typically beneficial for only one child ~ the one that is getting all the extra resources.

I totally disagree with this. I went to school when children were segregated from the mainstream classrtoom if they had any special requirements and it was not good for anyone. This carried over into the workplace, no one was gie accomodation for physical challenges at that time. By the time my own children were in school things had changed and they learned more than academics because they were educated alongside children who previously were not allowed to attend the same classes thay they were attending.

Once you start to exclude one child it will be easier to exclude another and where does it stop? I understand the problem about disruptive children and how that affects the other kids but I know that in my DGD's school those children have a plan in place to address the issue and ensure that the classroom is not a playground. I wonder why that is not the case in every classroom. Hitting and spitting is not tolerated in he school and is addressed when it happens. I am sure that for some children that lesson takes longer than for others but I do know that disruptive kids have an aide to assist them and the teacher as they learn more appropriate ways to interact with the others. The other children learn tolerance and how to handle situations that may be uncomfortable.

I also have read the stories of the unreasonable expectations a parent has placed upon a school system but I feel that those cases are really few and far between. Most people want the best for their kids and want a fair and honest effort to educate their children. How is that not a good thing?

 

[arminnie]

Because insurance pays for things that are medically necessary and school districts pay for things that are educationally necessary.

True - but even if the decisions of what is medically and educationally necessary are left to qualified medical and educational personnel there WILL be variations in what is deemed "necessary".

That's what it sounds like is happening here. The school district has designated personnel as "qualified" to make these decisions and the OP disagrees with these qualifications. That's the real issue.

You can go to one doctor for high blood pressure and get a totally different treatment plan from a different doctor. The hard part is when you as an individual do not get to choose who is making these decisions.

 

[Aristomommy]

I totally disagree with this. I went to school when children were segregated from the mainstream classrtoom if they had any special requirements and it was not good for anyone. This carried over into the workplace, no one was gie accomodation for physical challenges at that time. By the time my own children were in school things had changed and they learned more than academics because they were educated alongside children who previously were not allowed to attend the same classes thay they were attending.

Once you start to exclude one child it will be easier to exclude another and where does it stop? I understand the problem about disruptive children and how that affects the other kids but I know that in my DGD's school those children have a plan in place to address the issue and ensure that the classroom is not a playground. I wonder why that is not the case in every classroom. Hitting and spitting is not tolerated in he school and is addressed when it happens. I am sure that for some children that lesson takes longer than for others but I do know that disruptive kids have an aide to assist them and the teacher as they learn more appropriate ways to interact with the others. The other children learn tolerance and how to handle situations that may be uncomfortable.

I also have read the stories of the unreasonable expectations a parent has placed upon a school system but I feel that those cases are really few and far between. Most people want the best for their kids and want a fair and honest effort to educate their children. How is that not a good thing?

I personally don't think that segregation is the best answer. In the end, I would think that all children would benefit from interacting with children of all levels of abilities. DS5 has a girl in his classroom who is severely handicapped, in a wheelchair and unable to speak (she verbalizes with high pitched "screams"). While she is in the classroom part of the day and participates with modifications, there are times when she goes to therapies during tasks that would not be appropriate for her. Also the other children had a hard time initially with her screams and their focus would go from teacher to her. Our school did a fantastic job in including this child in mainstream classroom while also considering the other 20 children in the classroom. her parents are also wonderful and not at all demanding in their expectations. They do 99% of her therapies after school hours (without insurance paying for it after 20 visits/year) and do not expect everyone to step aside to make the classroom appropriate for one child.