Wow, what a slacker I am on the PTR.
Life has been so, so, so busy. Between work, back to school, therapies for the kids, sports, ballet, birthdays & other summer events... who has time for even sleep? Craaaaazy.
But today is a special day. One year ago today we held our youngest daughter for the first time.
She was so, so scared. She had spent 4 years so neglected that she couldn't speak, wasn't potty trained & rocked herself constantly to self-soothe. Her own hands were the only touch/love she had ever known.
Sweet, scared little girl- one year ago today:
What a difference in the course of 365 days of having a family. She went from neglected & abused in life to LIVING her life. From orphan to daughter. From unwanted to LOVED. She conquered her fears, she walked on grass, she swings, she runs, she climbs, she talks, she sings, she laughs (oh how she laughs!!!), she hugs, she LOVES. And she is so, so loved.
Happy 1 year family day Sweet Girl! I am so incredibly blessed to walk this journey with you- you helped me grow & changed me in ways you can never imagine. We are so lucky to have you in our family. LUB YOU!!!
There, did that make you cry? Made me cry. I'm an emotional mess today just remembering how far we've come & how scared we all were just a year ago. I could have never imagined she'd accomplish what she has! She's amazing!
Other life stuff... fun stuff first.
Like the Princess's FIRST CONCERT EVAH!
And what a great first concert it was! We love you Taylor Swift!
And we had a family reunion. Where I made these totally NON-DISNEY cupcakes. Oh.... for shame on me!!!
And we took this pretty nice family picture. We have very (VERY) few of these as I refuse most often to be in pictures!
And more importantly, we had a big FIVE birthday that will be a post of it's own as it was Princess theme! Little Girl waited A LONG time for this day- it was all she could talk about & it was very special for her! She was so excited she even sang happy birthday to herself.......
And last but not least. 1/2 Training. Well. I took all of July off. By 'off' I mean, complete and total lack of motovation. At the tail end of July with my 12 week 'window' quickly approaching, I had to sit down and face some hard facts.......
My current plan was not working. I was de-motivated, unsuccessful & just dreading the run. I was not going to be ready in time. See, I am very, VERY stubborn and I do not like to fail. I can push myself unbelievably when 'failure' is in my future so I don't end up failing. For instance, when I sat for my CPA- pass rate for all 4 parts at the time, first time around was like 15%? I was GOING to be in that 15%. I was. When I walked the 60 miles (with little to no training) for the Komen 3-Day.. I lost my walking partner early on & it was over 100 degrees each day. I suffered food injury and heat stroke. I threw up all over the medic tent. I still walked EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THOSE 60 MILES. I could have used a sweep car. Could have..but I'm stubborn. And I did it.
So for me to get this point was HARD. I felt defeated admitting defeat. My goal was I was going to run ALL 13.1 miles of the 1/2. And I know now that my body just can not handle it. I'm not there... won't be there. Don't want to be there. And so, I had choices to make.
After 'attempting' to get back in the game for 2 weeks with poor running results. I sat down and re-evaluated. How could I complete this? My answer came in the form of I needed to move myself to a run/walk 1/2 marathon. For me to come to that conclusion was so hard. I felt like I let myself down. But it was my choice- so I found one to use (Jeff Galloway) and began this week doing it.
First off, I maintained my workout for five days straight ( I never do that) . Second, It's harder than I thought because he runs you at a FAST run (9:40 mile) I usually run at a 11:30-12 mile. So I actually feel challenged still but not bored. Because the change in run/walk ratio keeps the time moving MUCH quicker and my mental game is better. I'm exhausted at the end of my workouts and that makes me feel good because it makes me feel like I'm still FIGHTING for this 1/2.. and for the first time, I'm MOTIVATED to keep going & doing it.... and so I have hope! 12 weeks starts tomorrow. I hope this gets me there.
Me, in the gym, after doing 3.1 miles!
And that's all she wrote folks. Time to get back work. It's overflowing my desk.